One of the ideas you have that I find most interesting is this concept of a G-Spot Self Massage. What exactly is it and how does it benefit women?
The G-spot is located inside of the vagina. If you slip your finger inside and just up a little behind the pubic bone, you will feel an area that swells with excitement. Massaging this area will increase your orgasm. You’ll have an orgasm that comes from deep inside and rises all through the body. It’s a much deeper and longer orgasm than a clitoral orgasm.
Now the G-spot is just one area. There are other spots, called inter-vaginal points. This energy has been understood and used for thousands of years in all cultures around the world. Much of it can be traced back to the roots of Tantra, Taoism, the Shamans, Kahunas and healers. It is the most powerful energy we have and when directed it can increase a women’s overall wellness. During the ’70s and ’80s, chiropractors, osteopaths, body workers were all familiar with these points but due to the controversy of these points, few practitioners worked on people. It’s obviously controversial for someone to be working on these points. Practitioners I used to refer to do [vaginal massage] no longer exist, so for the last 20 years, I have been teaching women to do these points on themselves.
Talk to me about penetration.
Many women believe that penetration is not necessary for a healthy sex life; this seems to be especially true in the lesbian community. This belief is not true. These inter-vaginal points are extremely powerful, in terms of orgasm and women’s health and wellness. Lesbians could potentially have better orgasms and be healthier if they would learn to incorporate vaginal penetration into their sex lives. Healthy inter-vaginal points cause a healthier pelvis, spine elongation, which results in better posture, better energy, less discomfort of pain, better organ function so you have less menstrual and menopausal cramping, better bladder and bowel function, and it allows the pelvis to be in a better position for more fulfilling sex.
Where are these inter-vaginal points?
The inter-vaginal points line the walls of the vagina; you can have harder areas and softer areas. Much like your shoulders are probably tight because of stress, and the back of your arm, your triceps, is soft due to lack of tone.
Massaging these areas gently decreases the tightness and tones the areas that lack integrity, bringing an equal balance to the tissue.
How do you do a G-spot massage and how do you know if it’s working?
The easiest way to do this is with a G Spot stimulator. Gently explore the tissue, you may or may not feel or understand how the tissue feels or how it is changing but you will still notice a difference in your overall well-being. Look for changes in your posture, your attitude and how you feel. For those of you wanting to really practice and understand that, you [should look] for tissue changes. When you find a spot that feels like it does not let you sink in gently, do not push hard; instead just gently hold the G-spot stimulator over the spot and allow it to melt into the area. If you find areas that seem overly soft, then again hold the G-spot stimulator over the area pressing very gently and you will feel the tissue begin to gain firmness.
What’s the usual reaction when you tell women to do the G-spot self massage?
Many women are embarrassed at first and then they realize that it feels good to have a place to tell their story and ask questions. I find most women feel a bit isolated around these topics, and usually feel that everyone else understands but they do not. Having understanding and control over your own body makes a woman feel powerful and confident which of course leads to enthusiasm and fun. You can do this alone or with a supportive partner. Your healthcare practitioner will not be the one to do these points with you. It really comes down to legalities, which is why no one I know does these points on their clients any more.
Many women come into my practice by referral or, often, sent by their partner. I am doing bodywork on these women, working on them through the external muscles and energetically. I let them and the partner know that if I work on them they will start to feel—and is that OK? Women often say there body just doesn’t work anymore and they are not interested in sex. As we know this happens often in long-term relationships, but way too often in lesbian relationships. As many have said, It is not that I don’t want sex, I do not want the sex I am having. So by taking control of their body, they take control over their lives.
Do clients report back to you?
Women who have practiced these points usually come back with glowing reports. They speak of having experiences of less back pain or no pain, more control of their bladder, they have a swing back in their walk. They also begin to feel better about themselves, which leads to a better sex life. Many women begin to work out because they start to feel better resulting in weight loss and tone. I could tell you stories all day long. It is very rewarding to see the transformation in these women, their relationships and their lives.
Notes from Kendal:
The G-Spot as well as the internal vaginal walls are important focus points for women to open up to and heal from sexual trauma as well as many other life issues and blockages. In my Female Genital Massage Workshops and G-Spot Healing Workshops both men and women can experience a Live Demo. They can get questions answered by the instructors and learn in a safe and sacred space. This form of Show-N-Tell Sex Ed is a fundamental empowerment tool for many people on their path of sexuality and healing.