Beauty in COVID-19.

There is great beauty in awareness.
There is gratitude if you have knowledge.
There is compassion if one let’s themself become educated.
There is hope if we pull together and allow TRUTH be shown without FEAR.
 
 
The question truly falls if we the people of planet earth are willing to do these things though.
 
The beautiful thing about the COVID-19 outbreak is that it is pulling us together as a world society.
 
It is showing our most brilliant aspects but it is also revealing our darkness.
 
And at the end of this plaugue we will be witness to our TRUTH.
 
Now what that truth is,
we currently do not know.
It will only come about when we reach the end of the swing of this pendulum,
and see if the masses focused on FEAR and destruction or if there were enough who chose to focus on love, gratitude, community, healing, courage, passion for life, and pulling back the curtains of the ego.
 
It is being said that we are at the end of days.
It is being said that it is all according to prophecy.
It is being said that it is a conspiracy of leaders to take over the world once and for all and enslave all of humanity.
It is being said that mother nature has had it with us.
It is being said….
and what over and over agian is stated is fear mongering.
The focus and attention to fear,
the belittlement of our greatness,
your greatness.
The threatening of your lives, your well-being, your everything.
And it is so focused upon by ALL,
that if we are not cautious then it will be for certain for many that this will become a tragic world event.
 
As I type this very musing to you,
our child abuse rates are increasing due to this panademic.
Our domestic violence rates are increasing and between these two alone,
our murder tolls are going up.
Suicide is on the rise.
And this is just the start.
 
Not to be a Debbie Downer right now,
but awareness and education show’s these facts.
 
In the face of this horrible panademic,
we are loosing countless thousands more because of our focus on FEAR.
 
It is education that we need.
Not fear.
Fear has never been a good solution.
It has never supported healing or growth.
Fear does not move you through a challenge.
It causes one to flee, hide or fight.
Which is what we are seeing.
 
Abuse increase.
Crime increase.
Alcohol and drug usage increase.
And we are not applying any attention to it.
 
Right now we have an opportunity.
As we sit in our states of isolation,
we have an opportunity to grow ourselves.
To ask the questions of our leaders, our selves and our communities that matter.
We have an opportunity to look at what has not been working,
and explore what could.
 
The answer is certainly not to crash the economy.
Causing our childrens children to suffer from this panademic 100 years from now.
The answer is to not shut down the world and our existance the way we know it, and instill fear into each and every soul, ‘creating a greater seperation.
No, seperration only results in all the above negativity.
The solution….
is AWARENESS.
EDUCATION.
FACTS.
Looking at ALL evidence, not just what media chooses to share.
Really looking at the numbers.
All of them, not just the death numbers.
Remember that statistics can be whatever you want them.
A person who wants to be aware, looks for ALL the facts.
This means,
age.
other issues/disease.
What the COVID-19 virus is really doing in our world – its natural swing,
remember that with all things you can only go so far up in numbers before there is a drastic decline.
Have you looked at this?
Whats the real percentage of people who even get COVID-19?
Have you gone to CDC.com or Worldometers.info and explored? (ALL the numbers)
 
If you claim to say that you are concerned for your health,
the worlds state,
the economy,
THEN DO YOUR PART and get educated outside of media.
 
We don’t have to agree.
We can have vastly different views,
thats awesome actually.
But if you are just blindly listening to media and what is being fed to you,
then know that you don’t have education or awareness on your side.
You are allowing yourself to be brainwashed.
 
And my point is two fold:
1) If you are going to be brainwashed at least CHOOSE what you are ingesting.
2) Fear NEVER fixed anything. And what we have on us right now is a FOCUS on FEAR with this crazy idea that it will be some part of the solution.
 
Its time we focus on something better then FEAR if we are to save our world and create a safe and prosperous planet for our youth.
 
And it is time to find beauty again in the lesson that we are being given from God and Mother Nature.
 
It is not a lesson to seperate and hide from the truth, to toss our hands up and let someone else deal with the solution and pray that they have our best at heart…
 
No.
 
It is a lesson to find gratitude for the life that you were given,
the planet that you were born on,
the world family of humans that ARE smart and creative,
who when they desire to truly come together and find a healthy path,
 
CAN.
 
I for one believe in humanity.
I believe in TRUTH.
I believe in shining a light in the darkest of days.
 
Are you willing to become aware enough to have an actual educated opinion?
 
Or will you continue to ignore and be a victim to this day?
 
Sending you all my love sweet reader,
with many prayers of gratitude for you and this world.
 
Let your light shine.
And as always,
 
Stop Existing & Start Living
 
“Coaching for Grwon A*s Believers”
 
Now accepting applications for 1:1 coaching.
 
Learn how you can let go of that that causes you stress and fear and truly create the life that you’ve always wanted for.
 
Plus inquire about my group coaching for ways to reduce anxiety and stress with a 5 week mastermind on the vagus nerve.

TRAUMA GREW MY ROSE GARDEN AND GRATITUDE WATERS IT.

TRAUMA GREW MY ROSE GARDEN AND GRATITUDE WATERS IT.

Today is a really interesting day for me.
It marks my one year of one of the most traumatic events I have had happen in a relationship so far. It also marks my one year of a massive transformation period, new growth and opportunity blended with trauma and needed healing.

Today I sit here at Starbucks after dropping my youngest son off to his father ( the man I fell out of relationship a year ago today).
It was brutal to drop him off today.
My heart actually still hurts from this mornings exchange.

Our son age four, ran to the back seat of my car as we pulled into daddy’s driveway and he screamed, “I don’t want to go to daddy’s house.” he got so frustrated, clung to the rear seat with all the force his little body could muster and screamed, “No Mommy.”

I grabbed him up, hugged him. Told him that I loved him and that I would see him later today and then he would be back at mommy’s house on Wednesday. He clung to my neck and fought profusely to hold on to me as his father took him out of my arms.

I never wanted any of this for my baby.
I don’t believe that any of us parents ever want this sort of emotional pain on our children. I don’t believe that my ex desires this trauma to come up on our son either.
And yet it still falls here.

Today, I find myself sitting here upset at my son’s pain.
Wishing I could do more for him.
Wishing that us adults who have brought this on him could have communicated better about what we wanted from each other and how we wanted out of our relationship before it came to violence as it did and a nasty, terrorizing breakup that will last a life time for our children emotionally not to mention the physical repercussions that are still being dealt with for myself.

I sit here still wondering how I could not have realized more so as to where my ex was at.
Wondering why he had to act out in violence and rage the way he did one year ago today.
Why it was so important for him to push me and all the children away with such extreme measures.
Why could he just not simply say that he wanted out and we move onto separate paths in peace and harmony, working together for the greatest good of all the children and each other.

I knew he was unhappy in our relationship.
I knew he wanted out.
He did not even desire to want to spend 30 minutes a week with me alone even though this had become a consistent request and desire of mine. He could not stomach to sit by me and watch TV, he wanted nothing to do with cuddling or sex that was two sided, only wanted to get off and be done. Would roll away in disgust after pushing me away like trash after he had reached climax.
He became rageful with friends and emotionally and physically aggressive toward his step-children. He was hateful and I told myself that he was stressed about work, money, health, anything but the truth was what I proclaimed.

The signs were there.
They were in front of my blind eyes and desire to make it all work for us.
The more committed I became to our relationship and requested time and connection,
the more he pushed away in anger.

And now,
a year later I see the truth.
I see his pattern that he had to enforce.
I see the pain that he must be in.
And I am grateful that even though that was a brutal time and experience,
even though there is still much healing that needs done for self and children.

I am grateful that I never lost who I was,
I never lost love,
I never lost my family or friends,
and I can do the healing and I understand at a deep level the power of emotions,
the importance of knowing self and NOT hiding from myself and feelings.
I am grateful that I was given a powerful opportunity last year to stand up and be 100% me.
The last year has offered me so many blessings that would have never come about had he not caved to his patterns and needs to push love away, to push so hard that he was the one to be abandoned in the experience by everyone. To repeat the trauma from his youth. And to create an experience that supported his belief that the feminine always leaves him.

I see now how he had to push that hard.
I am too stubborn to leave when I still love.
I believed it could be fixed,
I believed that he was not lying when he said that he loved me more than anyone else.
I strangely believed in us and in him.

But today,
today I stand in gratitude for the 7 years of learning,
of experience and growth,
for the birth of my two youngest angels that i would not trade for anything.

Today I stand here in gratitude for his push.
Busted up body and everything,
it was worth it.
Because I found my true strength.
I found my heart.
My SOUL.
And tapped into allowing myself, to be me without needing another.
There is great beauty in the darkest of clouds if you allow yourself to see it and you allow time to step you back far enough to see the whole sky and it’s beauty.

Life is one BIG TRUST EXERCISE.
And today,
I am reminded of the trust and faith that I had to muster up at one of my lowest, scariest points in life so far.
Today, I choose to focus on that reminder.
To focus on the gratitude and the opportunities that have come from this event, like any event in our lives.
Today I choose to look at my blessed life.
The steady massive love that I experience from family, friends and the wonderful man I have in my life currently.
The AMAZING tribe that I have developed and all the growth that I am seeing in my business and life.
The wealth of connection, joy and the laughter that resides in my home daily that was not there a year ago or before.
My creativity at an all time high.
The beauty and bounty that is in each step on this journey.

Today I want to say THANK YOU to the man that tossed me to the side last year, who tried to destroy me and all that we had built together.
From that rubble grew a rose garden.

MY ROSE GARDEN.

Thank you for my pain.
Thank you for my suffering.
Thank you for the trauma.
Thank you for the goodbye.
I am so effing happy with my life TODAY!

My question to you that I share this with today is,
what are you doing with your trauma, drama and pain? Does it hold you back or build you up?

As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

It’s time that you start to say YES to the most important person in the room beautiful. It’s time that you accept your worth, and step onto this path that your SOUL is calling you too.

I know how hard the steps may appear.
I know that you are fearful, that you doubt if you have what it takes to make this shiz happen for you or not.

But I promise you that YOU can do it.
You can have it.The first step though is to recognize that you must let go and have faith in your process of getting there.

Listen to your SOUL and follow it’s lead.

Imagine having a coach who has been on a similar path guide you, help you discover the deeper meanings of what soul is wanting you to know.

What would it feel like to have that sort of support and guidance?

You can have this.
Message me for deet’s on 1:1 Private mentoring and coaching today.