How Can You Be Spiritual & Sexual? ~ Ben Belenus

For some, spirituality is all fluffy and dream-catchery; our day‘s intention is to live with an open-heart and make smiley differences in the lives of others.

For others, spirituality is all about surrender to unfolding Source, personality annihilation and manifesting stillness.

But what about sex?

We live in a world with billions of sexually repressed women, billions of sexually damaged men and millions of people addicted to pornography. Many of those people would describe themselves asspiritual.

Something has gone wrong. The repression of sex can be held accountable for so many of our world’s ills. It is time to take a good look at the assumptions that we make about our sexuality, time to embrace some kick-ass spirituality.

For many people journeying a spiritual path, there’s much confusion about how to handle sex impulses that naturally arise. What does a student do when he has lusty thoughts about his gorgeous yoga teacher as she demonstrates downward facing dog?

What does a meditator do when she has the urge to masturbate (about a young muscular man at the ashram)? What does an internationally renowned teacher do when he no longer finds his gorgeous wife sexually attractive, preferring to indulge in his friends with benefits?

Sex is a mother load of work for every one of us.

People, the good news is we are all wonderfully sexual beings, for all is sex. Sex brings this all into being. The bad news, thus far, is that our patriarchal culture and a myriad of flesh-denying religious teachings have left us all with a sexual shadow.

How can we be spiritual and not sexual? Not possible.

I would describe myself as a sexual creature. I am also in touch with an inner yearning to understand what this experience called life is all about. I am a sexual mystic. Over the years, I have encountered many mixed messages from the spiritual scene as to what to do with all the sexual energy that flows through me.

Abstain? No. Embrace and share? No. Hide it? No. Tell everyone about it? No! Beyond the spiritual scene, in the world that I grew up in, there were even more mixed messages. Isn’t it extraordinary how sex is so out in the open, blatantly used in all media, and yet, it is so hidden; nobody talks freely about it. No wonder I was confused.

As a spiritual evolutionary, I was determined to find my way through the confusion. The essence of what I discovered is that this isn’t the time to pretend that our sex is bad or isn’t there. It’s no time to be guilty about something that is so beautiful.

It’s no time to bear shameful wounds that stand in the way of our wholeness. This is a time to embrace our every sexual feeling, every nuanced energy that moves within and to see it all as nature; a flow from divinity itself. Sexual mindfulness if you will. Sexquanimity.

I have peered deeply into the origins of sexual energy and seen that sex is the life force that brings everything into being. It is the most austere of energies that moves within us. Fellow seekers, let’s not deny that energy—let’s embrace it, talk about it, love it and celebrate it.

That surely is the way that we can return to wholeness. It is only when sexual energy is embraced and celebrated that our shadows will enlighten. Celebration of our sex has to be an integral part of any spiritual journey.

Wholeness is ours to be experienced when we indulge in all of life with awareness. Even those sexy, naughty, juicy parts of us that we would rather pretend weren’t there.

Om Mani Padme Hum

Original Post on Elephant Spirituallity

Ben Belenus is a truth seeker, worshipper of women and Author. His juicy new book “The sex god – No Mud No Lotus” is a thorough and sacred investigation into sex, love and authenticity. It’s a sexually explicit and passionate love story that follows one man’s evolution towards spiritual freedom. The story follows Ben from innocence into sexual cockiness, painful infidelities, porn addiction and then onwards into deepest Tantric Love.

The Egg

~ You would think that one would stop being amazed at the universal energies and how they manifest in our life, yet I swear, the smallest of things still make me smile in great awe of a child on Christmas morning. The other night I was meeting at Starbucks with an incredibly enlightened and gifted man. As we sat there I watched the sparkle of “the light energy” (god energy) dance in his eyes while we shared our tales of life and our growth. At one point he distanced his presence, focused on his phone, tapped a few keys, asked me what email he should send a story to and made it happen. Today, after a day of following the signs , breathing in the direction of 2012 and realizing I need a sail boat for the year of the water dragon (so that I can fully grasp my own personal exploration), I found a time to read what he had sent. Below is a copy of the story.

My amazement comes from the depth of connection I felt as I read the final few lines. Why the connection? It threw me back to being a child of 4 years or so sitting on the toilet in my family home bathroom that was being renovated. LOL Funny thing, but as a small child I found great guidance coming from the conversations I would have with my “imaginary friend” who always shared stories and what seemed as wisdom to me while I took care of my business. The ending of this story The Egg, was one such tale that was a running theme coming from my “Imaginary friend,” Seth.

I hope you enjoy the tale and look forward to hearing your feedback and thoughts/opinions on it.  Namaste’ ~

 

The Egg

By: Andy Weir

“Wildy surreal landscape by Vladimir Kush. “

 

You were on your way home when you died.

It was a car accident. Nothingparticularly remarkable, but fatal nonetheless. You left behind a wife and twochildren. It was a painless death. The EMTs triedtheir best to save you, but to no avail. Your body was so utterly shattered youwere better off, trust me.

And that’s when you met me.

“What… what happened?” You asked.“Where am I?”

“You died,” I said,matter-of-factly. No point in mincing words.

“There was a… a truck and it wasskidding…”

“Yup,” I said.

“I… I died?”

“Yup. But don’t feel bad about it.Everyone dies,” I said.

You looked around. There wasnothingness. Just you and me. “What is this place?” You asked. “Is this theafterlife?”

“More or less,” I said.

“Are you god?” You asked.

“Yup,” I replied. “I’m God.”

“My kids… my wife,” you said.

“What about them?”

“Will they be all right?”

“That’s what I like to see,” Isaid. “You just died and your main concern is for your family. That’s goodstuff right there.”

You looked at me with fascination.To you, I didn’t look like God. I just looked like some man. Or possibly awoman. Some vague authority figure, maybe. More of a grammar school teacherthan the almighty.

“Don’t worry,” I said. “They’ll befine. Your kids will remember you as perfect in every way. They didn’t havetime to grow contempt for you. Your wife will cry on the outside, but will besecretly relieved. To be fair, your marriage was falling apart. If it’s anyconsolation, she’ll feel very guilty for feeling relieved.”

“Oh,” you said. “So what happensnow? Do I go to heaven or hell or something?”

“Neither,” I said. “You’ll bereincarnated.”

“Ah,” you said. “So the Hinduswere right,”

“All religions are right in theirown way,” I said. “Walk with me.”

You followed along as we strodethrough the void. “Where are we going?”

“Nowhere in particular,” I said.“It’s just nice to walk while we talk.”

“So what’s the point, then?” Youasked. “When I get reborn, I’ll just be a blank slate, right? A baby. So all myexperiences and everything I did in this life won’t matter.”

“Not so!” I said. “You have withinyou all the knowledge and experiences of all your past lives. You just don’tremember them right now.”

I stopped walking and took you bythe shoulders. “Your soul is more magnificent, beautiful, and gigantic than youcan possibly imagine. A human mind can only contain a tiny fraction of what youare. It’s like sticking your finger in a glass of water to see if it’s hot orcold. You put a tiny part of yourself into the vessel, and when you bring itback out, you’ve gained all the experiences it had.

“You’ve been in a human for thelast 48 years, so you haven’t stretched out yet and felt the rest of yourimmense consciousness. If we hung out here for long enough, you’d startremembering everything. But there’s no point to doing that between each life.”

“How many times have I beenreincarnated, then?”

“Oh lots. Lots and lots. An in tolots of different lives.” I said. “This time around, you’ll be a Chinesepeasant girl in 540 AD.”

“Wait, what?” You stammered.“You’re sending me back in time?”

“Well, I guess technically. Time,as you know it, only exists in your universe. Things are different where I comefrom.”

“Where you come from?” You said.

“Oh sure,” I explained “I comefrom somewhere. Somewhere else. And there are others like me. I know you’llwant to know what it’s like there, but honestly you wouldn’t understand.”

“Oh,” you said, a little let down.“But wait. If I get reincarnated to other places in time, I could haveinteracted with myself at some point.”

“Sure. Happens all the time. Andwith both lives only aware of their own lifespan you don’t even know it’shappening.”

“So what’s the point of it all?”

“Seriously?” I asked. “Seriously?You’re asking me for the meaning of life? Isn’t that a little stereotypical?”

“Well it’s a reasonable question,”you persisted.

I looked you in the eye. “Themeaning of life, the reason I made this whole universe, is for you to mature.”

“You mean mankind? You want us tomature?”

“No, just you. I made this wholeuniverse for you. With each new life you grow and mature and become a largerand greater intellect.”

“Just me? What about everyone else?”

“There is no one else,” I said.“In this universe, there’s just you and me.”

You stared blankly at me. “But allthe people on earth…”

“All you. Different incarnationsof you.”

“Wait. I’m everyone!?”

“Now you’re getting it,” I said,with a congratulatory slap on the back.

“I’m every human being who everlived?”

“Or who will ever live, yes.”

“I’m Abraham Lincoln?”

“And you’re John Wilkes Booth,too,” I added.

“I’m Hitler?” You said, appalled.

“And you’re the millions hekilled.”

“I’m Jesus?”

“And you’re everyone who followedhim.”

You fell silent.

“Every time you victimizedsomeone,” I said, “you were victimizing yourself. Every act of kindness you’vedone, you’ve done to yourself. Every happy and sad moment ever experienced byany human was, or will be, experienced by you.”

You thought for a long time.

“Why?” You asked me. “Why do allthis?”

“Because someday, you will becomelike me. Because that’s what you are. You’re one of my kind. You’re my child.”

“Whoa,” you said, incredulous.“You mean I’m a god?”

“No. Not yet. You’re a fetus.You’re still growing. Once you’ve lived every human life throughout all time,you will have grown enough to be born.”

“So the whole universe,” you said,“it’s just…”

“An egg.” I answered. “Now it’stime for you to move on to your next life.”

And I sent you on your way.

Awakening to the Messiah on The Road Less Traveled

“If I had a hammer, I’d hammer in the morning, I’d hammer in the evening, All over this land.
I’d hammer out danger, I’d hammer out a warning, I’d hammer out love between my brothers and my sisters, All over this land…

Well I got a hammer, And I got a bell, And I got a song to sing, all over this land.

It’s the hammer of Justice, It’s the bell of Freedom, It’s the song about Love between my brothers and my sisters, All over this land.” — Peter, Paul and Mary (Song Lyrics)

Looking out into the world we see many individuals. We see nations, races and religious beliefs. We see OUR differences. Yet what we do not see often is ourselves in each person we come in contact with. A truly spiritual, Christ consciousness being can see and feel themselves in everyone that they interact with. They recognize the beauty and connection we all hold at a deep level. Intellectually we may all know that we are all children of God but when it counts we often forget.

Standing in line at a local Starbucks today I was witness to this very detrimental closure of the human disconnect in our world. A man who was obviously in a rush,  irritated and  numerous about the events happening “to him” went from testy to overly angered by the cashier who was new at her job and learning the register.

His reaction to her student-ship was far from human, and if the tides had been turned his harsh judgments and condescending statements would have been reviewed differently. However for my fellow brother in need of a time-out and an attitude check, I am sure his day went on to be one lacking in bliss and light.
If he had only paused and come from his heart in this moment he could have manifested a day of beauty and blessing not only for himself but also bestowed “light” unconditionally to an outside reflection of himself: The young cashier.

For any of the people in line with this man and for anyone reading this blog post here on Tantric Transformation, it is easy to see the negative impact his choice most likely bared to his day and perhaps to hers as well. But as Alcoholics Anonymous teaches, “ the only person you can change is yourself.” This is the awakening that needs to happen. It is the first step to positive world change and unity. The realization that we cannot ever be responsible for another’s consciousness or personal change. We can be guides, we can help create a positive environment for change and we can be supportive of others change by being the witness to ourselves and interacting through responsible unconditional loving of each as though they were ourselves. Because they are.

Don't Die with Your Music Still in You!Our personal disconnection from each other is scary.  Right down to the communities we live in we can see a dramatic change in connection just over the last 50-60 years. Go into an older neighborhood in your city and look at the homes that line the street. What do you see? Fully grown trees, beautiful architecture, driveways on the front side of the houses? Look past that.  What you see are two things that represent community and neighborly connection. Large front yards and front porches. Years back families would gather on the porch, enjoy ice tea or lemonade, a few beers maybe. They would socially interact with the family next door. Kids would be climbing those trees, playing in the sprinkler, chasing the dog from one front yard to the next. The front yards were deliberately designed larger to embrace comm-UNITY. Now look at your neighborhood? Unless you are one of the lucky few who bought one of these properties, you most likely live in a neighborhood similar to my own or in a townhouse/apartment.

Driving down the street in my neighborhood of 1500 houses or so, you find narrow streets, hard to pass on coming cars if there are any parked vehicles on the street in front of a home. You also find garages in the back of the homes and some up front. Shoe-box size front yards and 6 foot tall fences that shut out the world from the back yards which are normally far larger than the front yards. Around the 6 o’clock hour you will be plummeted by people speeding down the narrow street and quickly escaping from the world as they press the garage door button 3 houses away so that they don’t have to pause to wait for it to open. No
sooner does the car pull to a stop in the garage when the door comes down again. This is a representation of our inability to get along and open ourselves to not only our neighbors, our supposed friends but also to our families, our loved ones and most importantly to OURSELVES.

We live our lives based on fear. You may say no to this statement, or you may agree but I can share with you that the one thing I have been blessed to witness to in myself and with many people that I walk this path with is that we are all
fearful of something. And you may be thinking right now, “yeah I am scared that
a hurricane is going to come this fall and wipe out the area that I live,” “I
am fearful that my spouse is going to leave me for another,” “I am fearful of
getting cancer,” “I am fearful of losing my job,” or “I am fearful of losing my
soul to the fiery depths of hell if I do not live according to the doctrine of the
one true church, (and that of course is the one I go to.)” None of these fears ultimately matter. These fears are all ego based as ALL fears are anyway. They are controlling our free will, our spiritual nature. The only fear that we all
share is one much deeper and far more de-abilitating then any above. It is the
fear of vulnerability. Transparency. It is the fear of being seen and of seeing
ourselves, not only in the mirror as we brush our teeth but in each person we
come in contact with.

sunflower tantra july 20th2011 404-1Yet it is what we need to embrace to heal. Truly heal not only ourselves but the whole world. To quote M. Scott Peck in his book The Different Drum, “There can be no vulnerability without risk; there can be no community without vulnerability; there can be no peace and ultimately no life, without community.” But what does REAL community mean? It is what we all want. The unity and total acceptance from our fellow brothers and sisters.  It is learning how to appreciate and even celebrate in another’s individual cultural, religious and spiritual differences. It is the knowing that in the end we are ALL going to the same place and that if we are truly all children of God then it does not matter the name we choose to call Him or the house we choose to visit him in. Would you love your child any less for saying daddy then father or papa? Would you condemn your child for confiding in you with their fears, worries and hopes in their bedroom or the backyard because you only talk with your mother in the kitchen? No. Of course not. That is just plain silly, right? Well, this is what we are doing when we stand firmly in saying that OUR church is the ONE true church. It is the only way to the Promised Land; it is the only path to the arms of our creator. Every ancient spiritual text that has been converted into a religious path says the same thing, “Love thy neighbor as thy self.” This does not mean that we should only love those that are easy to love, that share our views and faith, that are the same race, same financial standing, or are just sweet people.  This
means love thy enemy, because he too is thy self.

Recently I watched a film called The Grace Card. This point was made very clear in this movie. An African American pastor of a small congregation was preaching at the pulpit about loving thy neighbor. During his sermon he shared the above and said “What do you do?” The congregation replied loudly, “Love them anyway.” He paused, looked out at his followers and said, “But what if I don’t want to? What if I don’t know how or even if I can?” Ladies and gentleman, now that is the truth. What if you don’t want to? Or know if you can? What if they are truly that hard to love and you know that in order to open to love with this person you are going to have to push the unconditional envelope hard?

As hard as it may be, the grace we all so want, the unconditional love and acceptance we long for, the fullness and intimacy we crave in our relationships and the world peace we know is mandatory not only for our physical salvation but for our spiritual as well will ONLY come about when we can first be forgiving of ourselves and open to the power of our vulnerability and we gain control over
our own personal Satans, our egos and harvest inner peace and unconditional
love for ourselves. If each of us were to respect ourselves at this level then
the natural repercussion of this internal awakening would be the unconditional
gift of acceptance, adoration, honor, love and comm-UNITY for all. Where would be the need for war and hatred if we had peace and love inside?

Only those who are closed to the reality that our external world is an illusion and only a dream that is playing out based on our internal consciousness will have
difficulties in this personal level of respect and honor. Even Freud, an
atheist, said that the purpose of psychotherapy (healing the psyche) was to
make the unconscious conscious.  Carl Jung ascribed human evil to the refusal to meet the Shadow – the Shadow being those aspects of ourselves that we do not want to recognize and that we constantly try to hide in the closet of our consciousness. Once we awaken to the fact that we are “made in the image of God” and what this passage is really sharing then we can change our external world.

Made in the image of God…

Think about that for a moment.

You’re still reading. You have not paused to seriously, stop and think about it.

Made in the image of the creator, my god, your god, our god.

Inspired PathThe creator can do anything and enjoys creating, manifesting and sharing unconditionally because only through the gift of true unconditional sharing is Satan(The shadow) slain and light revealed. Only making what is hidden revealed from the shadows can we be truly like God. To embrace being like God, means to not only intellectually understand but to proactively be the cause of positive manifestations such as peace, love, community, a healthy planet Etc. We are each made in his image because we are each creators of our universe and our collective existence. We have the ability within us to create, to manifest, and to master the universe.

The ancient knowledge of the mysteries of the universes and of our father in heaven resides within each of us. We each own a blueprint. In order to read it however we may have to seriously consider the impractical thought of changing the rules of the game since the rules are seriously killing us physically and spiritually. It is time to awaken and not only walk down the road less traveled, but also play to the beat of a different drum and realize that we must go against the status quo in order to save the skins and souls of our children’s children.

The matter of changing the rules is no longer an option.

It is time to make a call to action and to truly live up to our God potential and Love thy neighbor the way Jesus, Buddha, The Dali Lama, Osho and Mother Theresa  did.

The Messiah is here with us now.

The Messiah is YOU.

The Messiah is Me.

The Messiah is the man who needs a timeout at my local starbucks.

The Messiah is a United Christ-Consciousness.

Go forth today in love and ight and proactively mean it!