Are You Arguing For Your Limitations? I Bet You Are.

Have you ever noticed how much time and energy you spend arguing for your limitations?

 

Even after you get what you want.

 

Yesterday I co-taught a class for men on consciousness and development of their masculine energy in their relationships, sex and life.

A running theme that I heard come from the men’s mouths was the clarification and owning of excuses as to WHY they could not have what they wanted for.

 

Later in the day,

I worked with a few clients/friends on similar issues.

As I sat listening to them I found myself internally shaking my head in amazement at how they could not see their fear over getting and having exactly what they had been wanting for all these years.

 

And so they in turn argued for their limitations in having it.

Putting up roadblocks everywhere and getting angry about the roadblocks.

 

I was doing a coaching session with a client,

and in our conversation his verbiage about life and self was focused on the inability to say yes to himself,

yes to life,

yes to his desires and dreams,

and how he fully owned that he was not worthy of such good things because he felt that he had not done what he needed to do to receive it.

His every other word was condemning himself for basically being human,

and he sat there convinced that it just could not be so.

As I brought this verbiage into light for him and inquired,

“How is this serving you?”

 

He would agree with me on topics and even the awareness of what he was speaking into manifestation,

but then without a second thought fall right back into speaking the shit that was not serving as though it must be this way.

All the while admitting that he had a great life,

full of blessing,

but that he was unable to see it or feel his own happiness in it,

because he did not deserve it for this or that childish reasoning of a need to be perfect and not be human.

That what he wanted was for sure there,

but not showing up the exact way that he wanted it too.

 

Fast forward,

I was chatting with close friends about their relationship and some of the things that are coming up for them in their communication and sex.

 

Again,

they were arguing for their limitations in their love and connection.

 

Now they were not arguing with each other,

As of yet at least,

but the argument to find what they did not want for was there and ever present.

So much so that they had each retracted back into their critical minds, away from their heart centers and were viewsing their relationship and love from a place of fear.

Fear of not getting it right,

fear that they are broken,

fear that the other is at fault or will do what a past lover has done,

fear that they are not worthy of what they have called into manifestation.

 

And so they sat there with me,

terrified of self and of each other.

In ways pointing fingers at one another energetically,

recreating old wounds through the applied fear in thought of triggers,

their energy was shut down and snippy even.

At points I was feeling like I was tapping on a bed of needles in trying to share what I witnessed and help them to open to love and their own humanness.

 

The emotion on all fronts of my day yesterday was immense.

The room of men who shared from their deepest heart centers and revealed such beautiful vulnerability to a group of strangers. Their tales of truth and challenges.

 

My client who danced in his ego proudly while fighting for why it was not okay for him to be human or to be happy,

and his pain and fear around allowing himself to have what he wanted for.

 

My friends, who love each other dearly and manifested this incredible connection and fairytale romance,

who are fighting internally to keep distance from their hearts and desires,

by literally creating roadblocks inside self to prevent connection and getting angry about it.

 

All of the tales of yesterday had three things in common:

 

1) A wanting/desire to manifest what they already had

 

2) An arguing for the limitations that they felt they needed somehow

 

3) Anger around having what they wanted for but not having it exactly the way they wanted it

 

And so it is.

These are the common issues with us humans.

In all subject areas of our lives we do these things.

We want, we manifest, we argue for limitations, and we get mad that what we want is not exact to plan.

 

And even when it is exact to plan we get pissy about it because we feel like we are not worthy of it coming to us with ease,

or at all often.

And therefore,

we throw away what we want so badly for while making excuses as to why we must get rid of it.

 

We humans spend more time arguing about getting what we want while it is present in our lives then appreciating what we want and how it is already here with us,

so that we can live our lives in bliss and happiness.

 

Imagine if we just stopped this shit.

And got grateful for how amazing we are at manifesting what we want.

 

Instead of trying to kill our dreams and desires when they arrive like they are some sort of evil that is invading our homes in the middle of the night.

 

Why do we do this?

Why do we fight with our manifestations with such insistence that we cannot have or keep them?

 

It’s really quite simple.

 

We fear our worthiness.

If we stop fighting for our limitations,

we have to own our worthiness,

which means that we have to embrace the fact that we are powerful.

We can no longer point fingers of blame to God and other people and outside influences for us not being happy or having the life that we want,

we have to actually own ourselves and be responsible.

 

Well f-ck!

 

And so it is the easier path to toss the towel in frequently and say it did not work,

or that we are not good enough,

we don’t have the time or understanding,

that someone else is not doing their part,

that the economy sucks or government prevented us from it,

our church, family and state are to blame,

our upbringing,

etc.

 

But this is what cowards do frankly.

Make excuses and argue for limitations.

 

I don’t believe that any soul that I sat with yesterday is a coward.

 

Nor do I believe that if you are reading this today,

that you are either.

 

I do believe that we are all guilty of not knowing how to SURRENDER to receiving.

 

We fear it truthfully.

We look at surrender,

we feel a tad into what we perceive it to be and it feels dangerous and triggers us to old wounds from our past  so we find ourselves constantly saying no to the life that we want and to our happiness,

even when we have successfully manifested it.

 

Today I ask you to do one thing.

Today I ask that you bring attention to where you are arguing for your limitations in receiving the happiness and things you desire for.

 

I ask that you just begin the process of witnessing those thoughts and the feeling they create for what they truly are…

 

your rebuttal against your joy and receiving.

 

In doing this you will start the process of letting them go.

And create a new space to open the door to having.

 

You may find yourself shocked at what you discover,

and the truth that in many ways the life that you are craving for is knocking at your door and may already be with you in some ways,

but your insistence of not having it is blinding you to its manifestation.

 

So stop being snippy with your dreams.

Stop denying your joy in your pursuit for suffering.

You are worthy.

God/universe does not create anything that is not worthy and your life is not meant to be one of struggle.

 

That is a lie we humans tell ourselves to entertain our ego’s.

Your soul knows the truth.

 

Trust, surrender, and breathe deep,

your desired life is happening now.

 

As Always,

Subconscious Thoughts Effing Up Your Desired Life?

Thoughts turn to feelings,
and what do we do when we have been programmed so hard core to have negative thoughts,
or to feel guilty about certain things,
or shame even?
How do we clean up our subconscious minds and thoughts?
I mean we have all been told that these subconscious thoughts affect our outcomes. That they are sneaky little bastards that rise up and cause havoc in our lives and get us to self-sabotage when things are going so great.
Right?
And these subconscious thoughts impact our vibration,
our ability to create the life that we want for,
Right?
It can feel like a real battle to overcome and clean up this junk in our minds,
in our subconscious world.
I mean, shit its subconscious, so we gotta first make that stuff conscious so we can properly dispose of it,
Right?
Or maybe we can just put ourselves in a trance state and clean them up without even knowing we are cleaning them up?
Maybe.
But I want to share a little secret with you today.
It’s a good one too.
I want you to toss around the idea that maybe,
just maybe the only thoughts that actually impact your life and outcomes are not your subconscious ones but instead the thoughts that are ACTIVE.
So if it’s a subconscious thought,
a truly subconscious thought, meaning below consciousness
you won’t have feelings around it because there is not enough activation around it to compete with what your soul, your core really knows.
And here is what you really need to understand,
if you are having a feeling around the thought….
then it’s NOT a subconscious thought,
its and active thought that’s in competition,
or not.
You can have an active thought that’s not in competition with who you really are and what you really know,
and that thought will feel like a good idea.
That thought will feel energizing,
you will feel vitality from it,
you will have interest in it.
It’s really only the thoughts that are in opposition to what your soul knows….
for example if you are thinking a thought like,
“I am not good at this, I can’t succeed at this.”
Then your soul is not thinking this,
your soul knows differently,
and therefore you will be feeling a negative feeling.
So, don’t worry about subconscious thoughts weighing you down or being a disadvantage to you,
because they are not.
They are so subconscious that you are not feeling around them, they are a non-player to your life experiences.
It is only the things that you are feeling around that are players in your point of attraction,
in the experiences that are manifesting for you right now.
So this makes things far easier right?
If it feels good, yeah keep it active.
If it does not, stop thinking those thoughts.
But it is not that easy to just stop thinking these negative thoughts.
Because the law of attraction keeps them coming,
and that’s why we come up with this flawed concept that there must be subconscious thoughts playing against us and making all this shit happen.
Because logically, we look at the pain and crap and think,
“I would not do this to myself, so it must be subconscious.”
But it is NOT subconscious,
it’s VERY CONSCIOUS.
And you keep thinking these thoughts and creating these results because it is easier to think these thoughts because they have momentum, then it is to stop thinking that thought.
You get it?
So what do you do?
You have to know that there are other thoughts,
there are other thoughts that feel better,
that you are conscious sof as well,
and are ACTIVE as well,
and you CAN, with a little bit of effort hook into these thoughts and create stronger momentum with them,
shifting your perspective from that,
that is easy and negative to that,
that you actually desire to feel and create.
Many years ago, well actually about 15+ years I used to be so reactive to my thoughts, because they caused me to feel so yucky and angry, sad, guilty, shameful, empty, etc. And I believed to my core that this is just the way my life was. No matter how much self-growth work I did or how much journalling and workshops I went to, my results were bleak and my feelings were not what I desired.
I would flair up over little things it would seem,
but these little things had deep root systems in my mind and feelings. So I would get triggered easily and mad that someone had triggered me, then go into my victim mode and blow up in one fashion or another, or worse hold it all in and distance myself from all feelings, I would seem indifferent to life and those around me.
I spent years believing that I was aloof and introverted, when in fact I was just churning around and creating more momentum in these negative attitudes and thoughts.
I would stew on things and analyze them every way possible,
I would work my butt off to change things,
and I would deep dive into my issues,
without gaining the results that I wanted ever.
And then one day….
I learned this simple truth that I shared above.
It was not my subconscious thoughts,
It was not my past or my programming,
it was what I CHOSE TO KEEP ACTIVE in my mind and feelings.
It was where I was applying my attention.
And I had the power to look at whatever I desired.
I had the ability to focus myself little by little toward the thoughts that provided me the feelings that I wanted.
And from there would create the life experiences that I wanted.
But I had to choose to stop doing what was easy and let myself run down that rabbit hole of negative thoughts.
I had to choose to catch myself when I did, and not beat myself up over it, but simply change my direction of focus.
And now what used to take me 2 years to move through only takes me five minutes or less.
That’s it.
That’s the secret to getting everything that you want.
That’s all you ever have to do.
Be present and conscious of what you are choosing and stop making excuses around why you cannot do the self-check work of catching yourself.
Or the other option,
accept what you are getting with your stinking thinking and STOP bitchin’ about it,
because you created it,
CONSCIOUSLY.
So if you are sitting here today on this fine Monday and questioning why your world or this one or two subjects in your life are not going the way you want,
no matter how much effort you put in on them,
no matter how much you smile and do the damn things that you believe will get you the results that you want and see others getting from less work or the same,
then I am speaking to you luv,
I am speaking to you who wonders ,
“Why am I so unhappy.”
“Why do I not ever have good things happen.”
“Maybe I am not good enough, smart enough, pretty enough, healed enough, etc.”
or blaming your parents, your religion or government and upbringing for why your life is the way it is,
Nope it’s you baby.
You are creating this all with the thoughts you are keeping active.
Is it time to change what you want to keep active?
I would say so.
 
And As Always,
 
Stop Existing & Start Living
 
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
 
You were born worthy of so much more than what you are allowing right now.
 
It is time that you say YES to you.
Message Me for deet’s on 1:1 coaching now.
I can kick your a*s from any where globally.

I am So F*cking CRAZY! I cannot Believe I did this.

 

Yes! You read the title right… And here is what I am So F*cking CRAZY for.

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Are you ready for this TOTALLY insane deal?

Oooooooohhhh… I am!

I have been working all year long with so many incredible people. I love them all so much and have enjoyed coaching each person.
Unfortunately, not everyone can come into my office and get the 1+1 VIP treatment. And many people who I might be able to help either: * Do not live in Dallas or close enough to drive to me * Or simply cannot afford a private coaching experience
Granted I offer phone and Zoom coaching as well, sometimes you may just need something else.
The BIGGEST thing about coaching this year for me has been a focus on being able to help more people. I have been searching for a way to get my coaching out there into the world so that I can spread my RAW, unapologetic approach to life, love and sex without breaking anyone’s bank accounts and without exhausting myself.
Helping people is my PASSION. Coaching around sex and relationships and how our sex effects the well-being of our entirety as well as how important sex is for our spiritual growth is my PURPOSE.
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But how to get these sexy truth’s to you at a price that only a fool would say no to?

Well here is where I had to get CREATIVE.

Thank goodness something got into my system over the last little bit. Cuz… this mother of an idea came out of it and I am SO EXCITED…
When this idea first landed with me and I discussed it with my team, I could not make up my mind as to what programs to offer.
I knew I wanted more than one… But that is pretty much normal ME. Always wanting more than one of anything…LOL
I thought about it and thought well I could do a few things here… I could discount the shit out of my basic Sex & Relationship Coaching… but then I would STILL only be helping a few people in the Dallas/Ft.Worth area and maybe a few people who would want to do phone coaching in the USA and Canada.
Then I thought, well I could take one of my programs and put it all on video, like so many coaches are doing out there and seem to be getting great results with. But where is the personal touch that I am known for?
I could do email coaching and zoom coaching at a deep discount and help people every where… But I don’t have the time to do the follow up that would require and would certainly be overwhelmed before the week is out.

So what to do?

That was when God spoke to me.

I am not kidding here!

The message was, ” Hey Kendal, STOP playing small. STOP thinking small. The ONLY small thing should be the price tag on this package. – People have blah, boring sex lives. People are starving for connection and community. People are in need of healing in their relationships. People need to understand that the desires that they have were given to them by me, the Creator. — So Kendal, why don’t you STOP doing what you ALWAYS do and TRY SOMETHING DIFFERENT.”
BUT WTF does that look like I wondered…. (scratching my head)
That looks like this Mind Blowing Steal of an OFFER. That is what is looks like.
So Fuck YES! You can now get unlimited coaching. Preferential access to me. Facebook Live training. Video, audio and written coaching/training. And all your questions answered PLUS community and connection.

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