Random Naked Thoughts from the Key’s.

Today I visited Hemingway’s home here in Key West.
I love Hemingway’s work.
And after listening to the tour guide share tidbits from Hemingway’s history,
I can now understand why I love his writings.
The statement that rang so true and beared power with it was,
“He liked to write from experience. Hemingway was a man who craved adventure and went to find it. His stories come from those experiences.”
As I work with people,
and I move through my own life and just witness,
What I see often is the reverse of this for so many people.
Perhaps you know what I speak of.
So many people choose to not live.
Choose to not be part of THEIR own life in many ways.
Choose to not experience.
However, instead live their lives vicariously from a place separated from life.
They live watching others.
And they sit in judgment over these people that they sit and watch.
I have been around sports fans all my life,
my ex-husband is a HUMONGOUS football fan.
It’s hard to communicate with him during football season,
because NOTHING matters more than who is on the field and the decisions that they are making.
I have often wondered watching him,
sit in the living room or at a bar,
drinking, rooting, cussing and getting really upset at times over a penalty or a poor play,
what his fascination is in watching someone else play the game.
I mean I understand that they are talented.
I get that there is a world watching with him, and there may be money on the line,
but why just watch.
If you love the game so damn much,
Why won’t you go throw the ball with your kid?
Why don’t you want to play it yourself,
push your own edges,
make your own calls,
and feel the adrenaline of winning or losing.
Why just kick back and WATCH?
This Is not being an active participant in the thing you have so much passion and love for.
It would be like ( and I know that some actually choose this – no shame in it, you do you.) ….
It would be like you getting married to someone that you simply adore, love with everything but then have someone else step in and do the actual act of relationship for you.
So they have sex with your partner and you just watch,
never experience,
they raise your children,
you just watch never state your feelings about parenting and what is right and good or not,
they buy your house and choose the furniture,
they choose how the relationship with your husband/wife goes.
You just watch.
Never participate.
Never experience.
You get to witness it all,
but you never engage.
And then you say,
” I love being married. My partner is the best thing that’s ever happened to me. We are best friends. My kids are amazing. The sex is hot AF.”
Seriously?
Well we in truth actually do this to degrees.
We hire nannies.
We hire interior decorators.
We hire teachers.
We hire cleaners.
We may even activate a swingers lifestyle because we cannot fulfill in some ways and just request that our partner do everything in front of us,
so we can watch.
So we can see but not engage.
As we do with all the other areas.
And what are we doing in truth?
Not that any of the things that I shared above are bad,
so please don’t think I am saying that they are….
but that if we are doing these things to AVOID,
or to make it where we do not have to be responsible for…
then perhaps we need to question our WHY.
Perhaps it is time for us to ask ourselves,
Why are we so eager and comfortable to step out of our own life experiences?
What are we avoiding?
What are we shutting ourselves down for?
Fear.
Fear that we may get it wrong.
Fear that we could get hurt.
Fear that we may harm someone.
Fear that we may love and lose.
Fear of not being worthy of it.
SO much fear in living is what so many have,
and despite how much money is in the bank,
how big the house is,
how many cool cars you own,
you find yourself fearing connection and love.
The things that you crave so deeply for.
And you crave play and adventure.
You crave the feeling,
the true feeling of life moving through you in all it’s magical ways,
but you deny it daily.
You turn your back to it in the small things,
like football.
and you think nothing of it.
That is just a game,
everyone is watching it.
If you are a fan,
then THIS is what fans do.
They live through the players who are out on the court and playing…
LIVING.
And that is why the palyers get paid the BIG BUCKS.
So they can live.
Because you won’t.
Because you are f-cking terrified of living,
so you buy a jersey,
you upgrade your TV accounts to catch every game,
you go to the games and you get all the best tickets so that you can breathe it all in.
But when when it comes to you living your life,
and speaking from the space of actually experiencing life,
like Hemingway did…
well that is not for you.
That is for anyone but you.
And you look at those who have the balls to do it and you hunger to feel what they feel.
You love their sharing,
you love-hate that they are turned on to life and thriving,
but you still repeatedly say no to your dreams,
your desires,
your life that is asking you to live it.
And why?
Fear.
SO today as I bounce around Key West,
as I plan out the rest on my days here,
and all the really cool shit I have done and will continue to do,
as I look forward to my next adventure week after next and then again in two weeks and so on,
I sit back for a second in this moment and I feel compassion for you.
I feel a desire to impress on you that this is your life,
stop watching everyone else live why you sit back and make excuses as to why you cannot.
But what do I know right?
Life is not about you loving it and living,
life so I hear is about you listening to how to remain in a box and staying safe… HA! If that is a thing even. It is about you being responsible, because I guess if you are thriving that you are not responsible….
Not my experience.
But what some might say.
Share your thoughts if you dare.
Just mine as I sit here nude on my deck writing during an island thunder storm.
As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
Ready to start saying yes? Ready to activate your life and thrive? I sure wish you would say yes,
it would be cool to hang with you.
to share with you.
To walk this magical journey with you.
But the first step is the step of saying F-ck Fear!
Reach out to me if you dare to say yes to your dreams and want to know how you can accomplish them.

Through the Looking Glass: Past Lives, Present Journeys

I crossed a stone bridge in the mist and as I came to the other side I was transported into a life I once knew. Gazing down at my feet I saw beautiful gold threads wrapping around them but no shoes. I knew I was a woman. I felt young, happy, and light bodied. Full of energy and love.

I was in love!

I looked around the room, it was just incredible, full of rich colors, reds, gold, browns, many intricate designs embroidered on the materials and lots of sheer curtains. A smell of incense in the air. A large grey beast sat in the middle of my room. It was not an elephant, but large. I never paid attention to its face, although I know it had a head dress on of some sort. At first thought I must be in India or perhaps a similar culture.

 I was dancing around in circles.

Joyously.

I had such beautiful long dark hair and there were all these veils of color hanging from my head. My skirt was beautiful, the colors and design swirled around me in a cosmic dance of fashion.

 I danced and danced.

 

Without conscious thought, I was transported to the scene of my death. A large man with rippling muscles stood beside where I lay. As I looked up into his face I could bearly see his eyes for the strange headdress. He was holding my arms above my head firmly, I felt another holding my legs down. I was laying upon some sort of rock/stone alter. There this “high priest” (I am assuming) with a wooden staff that had feathers and beads hanging from it said something about my sacrifice.

Emotions were running wild at this point. I could feel the anxiety in my heart. Why had I wanted this? What was I doing? Was is right? Was it really for a higher purpose or for not?

I was still young and in love.

 I recall the damn love. Damning it for the pain I was feeling. The loss I would once again feel. I gazed out over this vast, lush, beautiful green valley where my people stand below. It was a tropical forest created by the hands of the Gods. It was my death place. Looking out into the crowd, tears in my eyes I found the returning look my heart was longing for. Locking in on a young man, incredibly handsome. Dark beautiful skin, muscles toned perfectly, black shiny hair down to his shoulders. He smiled at me and my heart returned the smile as well as my face.

As the smile lifted my soul to the heavens I was quickly reminded of the pain that we can expereince in this realm; a sharp burning sensation below my ribs took over my consciousness….

As though time did not exist I found myself floating above my people. Over my lovers head, looking back from my aerial view I could see a stone pyramid shaped temple. Steps leading up to where I had just died. I heard cheering and then was whisked away and began to come back to an awake state of being in current “reality.”

“Perhaps expereince is the driving force that brings us back. Or perhaps learning something begets the desire to learn more, and learning more begets the desire to learn everything there is to know.” – P.S. Berg, Wheels of a Soul

Our past lives have a way of bringing us valuable lessons in times we least expect it. And with each visit of a past life we will re-learn a lesson and also be invited to awaken to another. This was the exact case for me during my Sacred Voyage to Maui. Little did I expect to be visited by the above past life regression.  Years ago I had done massive regression work to release my bondage to certain fears and discover the meaning of some important relationships in this current life that I knew had carried their energies from past. This particular regression opened up some interesting insights; from a fear of dancing to the saga of loosing love that seems to have rippled through lifetimes.

Maui brought home the fact that I was not yet done learning and releasing from this above life.

The morning was fresh when we decided it was time to journey away to the first of many sacred vortexes. As Greg “Magick” Bernstein and I drove down the pot hole filled road he looked at me and shared that the sight he was being guided to take me he had not taken anyone for many a year. Uncertain as to why he was being guided to do so, he shared some of the history of the sight. Known as the Temple Gathering Place of the High Supernatural’s, this was the site where the last human sacrifice of Maui was done.

 

However before we venture into the realm of sacrifice and worship, we must first prepare our physical beings. Protection, Appreciation, Understanding, and Honor. These things he would cover with me in Iao Valley Park. There beneath the trees, beside the running river of time, we sat and talked. Among the tales shared was one perfect for the birthing of the adventure at hand. One that not even Magick knew as of yet.

 

 

“Once there was a couple who sat and watched a cat in the weeds and flowers. The woman said, ‘Oh, look honey, the cat is smelling the flowers.’ The man looked over to the cat and said, ‘He is not smelling the flowers, he is peeing on them.’ The woman said,’ Well that is not how I see it in my reality!” (Story adapted from the one Greg shared)

Two different realities.

 Providing spiritual clarity as to why he was guiding to this temple, I shared my above regression.

 

Once we were prepared we ventured off to the temple. At our arrival the gates were closed. Magick looked at me and asked me to sense if we were to continue or not. It was my intuitive call.  I called out to spirit and was told to move forward. As I crossed through the gates my heart began to hurt. It quickly became unbearable, almost as though it was being ripped out of my chest. As we rounded a curve on the path my eyes set out on the remains of two adjoining temples that commanded a view that when build I am sure was spectacular. Stepped stones that towered above a below stream almost covered in overgrowth, this pyramid like sacrificial mound took in the view of ocean, valley and high country. The energy that released from its blood soiled ground was strangely peaceful and even calming to my being although my heart chakra did not stop vibrating with its intensity until I found my meditation place. Here looking back at the sacrificial site from a vista point of stepped stonework I sat. Back to the sun, breathing in the universe and allowing the four winds to dance with my ethereal being. As my soul danced and listened I heard the call of spirit. Particularly the call of Snake.

There in front of me grew a bush up through the ancient stones. Upon it was a small white pod of sorts. It sorta looked like a wishing weed. Spirit was asking me to take one and eat it. I argued with spirit out of fear, out of doubt. “How crazy to hear spirit telling me to eat some strange plant at a death site. Yeah most likely not the best of all ideas.” But with each argument the winds would blast me from different directions, pressing themselves into me and the vision of snakes within the stones would grow stronger. Spirit was speaking! Loud too.

Finally I asked permission from land and plant to pick the small pod flower. However chose not to eat it. Asking spirit if I had to, I was answered with a vision. The vision was of a dark cave, rocks, fallen trees, moss and tall grasses. I had no idea as to where this was so asked Spirit to share this vision with my guide, Magick.

Through time and space our many lives ripple into each other.

Even science is starting to realize that what we believe is our reality,

more than likely is nothing more than an illusion. Through the awareness

of our previous lives and the lessons that we still need to learn from them

and the strengths that we can harvest, we can not only advance our own

growth and light energy but also our healing. As we heal, accept and learn

to value those things that we in times before thought limiting or nonsense

we too can learn to love and share more freely in this life; creating more positive

manifestations for our current reality.

 

Through the looking glass of time, I was blessed with a beautiful opportunity to face

my fears, my doubts and my heart. Here at the sacred site of death, I sacrificed my old

self for the birth of a new reality. One where, my heart would no longer carry the fear

it had for so many life times but instead would call out to the heavens and LEAD my

current incarnation. There is only so much wisdom we are allowed to gather at one

given time, and with each drop of this wisdom we must always realize that the birthing

of our new reality will not come without first a death… Here is where we must have

CERTAINTY and KNOW that we are not alone. Perhaps we cannot see all that is to

come to pass with each choice we make, however the Creator can!

 

“Even the wisest cannot tell that a mirror shows many things. Things that were, things that are and things that have not come to pass.” (Galadriel, Lord of the Rings)

Immersion of the Dragon — My Session with Alexander Brighton by Kendal Williams

As I walked up to Alexander’s door I had no idea what to expect in this tantric session. Having experience in Tantra and in healing sessions should set me at ease, however as I have discovered it truly has nothing to do with a session and EVERYTHING to do with what we are dealing with internally. At this particular time in my life I was dealing with a few emotional and physical challenges.  All of which I knew in my heart had to transform, but I was scared of the outcome. This particular session with Alexander Brighton was about my longing for harmony and transformation of these events in my life.

At first sight Alex calmed me with his whimsical happy smile and leprechaun sparkle in his eye. His playful, loving spirit breathed through my reservations and nervousness.  A warm tender hug and then guidance into his sacred space. Here he shared with me a quick over view of the session, revealing that we would be traveling away from his sacred space for the first part of the session.
Once I was present and feeling safe he asked permission to blind fold me. I agreed.
Then the REAL adventure began!

He guided me to his car, seated me comfortably inside and then drove me to our destination. As he parked the car in the driveway I could feel my heart rate increase. I was nervous and excited. What had he planned? What sort of adventure and healing awaited me?

The car door opened.
He took my hand in his, helped me out of the car and along a walk-way. I could hear a door opening then feel a cool breeze. I was inside a building of some sort. He had me sit down in a comfortable chair, asking me to relax and breathe deeply into my stomach. Telling me to breathe like Buddha. Deep, deeper. As deep as I could into my stomach to clear out all the old negative air and energy in my lungs, in all the corners where it had been stagnant for some time. Release all that I no longer needed.

As I did this he left my side for a few moments to prepare.
Next thing I knew he was by my side again. Guiding me yet through another doorway. Each doorway was magical in itself. In looking back I can see that each door way was a significant part of the session journey. Representing passageways that I had to cross through on my own free will.

This new location was warm. I could feel moisture in the air and hear the sound of waterfalls. Music playing in the background.  Its dance in the air accompanying me in each step of this healing. Alexander came to my side, close.
So close.
I could feel his breath on my shoulder, my cheek. It was arousing to only feel his breath and his light touch on my arm and shoulder.  Softly in my ear he asked for permission to remove my clothing.

Slowly sliding my dress down my body I could now feel the sun light kiss my skin, the breeze wrap its loving arms around me. Alex took both of my hands and slowly walked me over to where the ripple of waters sang a song of their life. Guiding me step by step he carefully walked me into a cool pool of healing water.  With each step into the pool I could feel a freshness of spirit come upon me. Alexander stood before me placing his hand on my chest and asking yet again for permission.
“Do I have permission of the goddess to hold you?”
“Yes.”

With my permission he took my naked body into his arms and floated me in the water. The water slowly molding itself to my body. My breasts partly revealed to the cool air.  I could feel his hands holding me in safely as he guided me through a meditation. Taking me to depths of energetic levels. Asking me to merge fully with my ethereal body. To trust in him, his voice, and his presence in this space. I could feel not only my breath under the water but his as well. His voice muted by the water my body almost fully emerged, I relaxed. Fully! His strong hands carrying me in safety.

As I released my stress and thoughts my body became more fluid like the water I was floating in. I felt only my breath and my heart. I imagine this is what outer space must feel like. Or perhaps this is the feeling of crossing over, of the release of our physical body?

Next he guided my floating body over to a place to sit. Here he sat behind me. Wrapping his legs and arms around my naked body. Sensual, arousing and safe. His hands gently found a home on my heart chakra at first. Here he guided me back into my body. Asking me to feel myself, to breathe and to be aware of the moment.  Slowly he placed his hands on my root chakra. Asking me to focus on the color red (the energy associated with this chakra). Then asked me to breathe, deep into the chakra as his hand massaged me. Warmth cascaded up my torso. A feeling of sexual arousal and connection all in one as he guided me into my root, connecting me to the earth, to my mother and to myself. Once I felt complete he moved his hand up to my second chakra, asking me to focus on the color orange and with each chakra he submerged me more and more into the waters of spirit and of self love and acceptance.

Soft tears cascaded down my cheek as the babbles of water sang along side me and Alexander’s warm hands  caressed me. His ability to not only hold space but comfort my crying soul as it released what was no longer needed was powerful in this moment. It was as though he was carefully holding my very soul and heart in his hands, kissing it with his energy and telling me that everything was going to be perfect.

That I was perfect.

Just as I was.

As he worked his way through my chakras and I released all the stuck energies I softened and relaxed even more into his cradle. Here I wanted to be. Here I accepted that every beginning in this life came from some other beginnings ending. Here I was at peace and in love with what was. I was soul. I was love and in love with the ONLY person that ever mattered in my life. Myself. Allowing me to forgive, release and heal all that I “thought” I could not previously let go. Here I could only feel love and acceptance. Support and harmony.

Here is where I still go today with each memory that I have of this blessed session with Alexander Brighton.  Thank you Mr. Brighton for being the inspiration, the teacher and friend that you are to so many in this world. Thank you for assisting me and supporting me on this life path and staying open in love with me as I move forward and sometimes backward. Your souls light is something that brings a smile to my face as I am sure it does to anyone open in allowing you to touch their own.
This Fire Dragon expresses GREAT appreciation and love for all that you do in the healing of the feminine and masculine energies of the world!

The Purpose of Humanity

“Your inner purpose is to awaken. It is as simple as that. You share that purpose with every other person on the planet – because it is the purpose of humanity.” –Eckhart Tolle

One day a tiny caterpillar awakens and starts it journey to becoming a beautiful butterfly, but does it have any concept of what it will be like to get there or to actually fly? Most likely not. It is a caterpillar and as a caterpillar it knows only one thing. The hunger it has for food. A caterpillar eats more than ten times its weight within a few days of life, it then becomes so sluggish that it barely has the energy to climb to a perch and connect itself to a plant where it will take the next steps to its transformation. Once attached though it relaxes, allowing its outer skin to dry and become a shelter where within a new life will emerge. In this tranquil state the old and the new reside within the same moment. As the nutrients consumed over the days before slowly unite with the breaking down of the caterpillar’s old body while new cells awaken. Together a beautiful process of creation happens. DNA structures change and within a short period of time what once only hungered for food of the earth and moved slowly on a multitude of tiny little legs, finds itself cramped tight in a cocoon that no longer serves its purpose. Slowly with great pressure the cocoon starts to crack and the wings of a new empowered creature reveals itself. Stretching its delicate wings out, feeling its new life cross over with the breath of Mother Nature, this butterfly takes to the heavens. Dancing in the sunlight, casting its shadow down on the earth that it once crawled on and allowing life to guide it to new heights and beautiful moments. No matter how short the life may be, this tiny creature experiences before our very eyes a multi-dimensional reality. It lives two lives in one, bringing with it the past life and all the nutrients it gained and fluidly developing that into a new more vibrant state of flow.

We too are caterpillars! Our purpose is to walk a path of transformation. To accelerate consciously the ever changing state of being. Life to life we consume more nutrients; we bring with us our past experiences, may they be good or bad does not matter to the soul. In soul each experience is just what it is suppose to be, a lesson, an activation. This constant state of reincarnation can only stop when the soul has grown to a point at which it no longer desires for rebirth.

“A major ‘Core Belief’ that affects all of your lives adversely is the belief in physical death.” – IXACA, Channeled by Verlaine Crawford (New Cells, New Bodies, New Life!)

Change is the only constant in life. Even what we refer to as death is nothing more than a change from one form to another, just like the caterpillar. Once we can embrace that death is part of life we may even happily run toward it. Wanting it to wash over us again and again. Each day we awaken to death. We experience a dark night of the soul. Our transformation of physical to ‘light being’ moves one step closer through the activation in conscious awareness by our inner vibratory initiations with grace, salvation and enlightenment. We become consciously closer to our goal. What is the goal?

To become like the Creator. Complete, Full, Illuminated with Love.

In this state we can achieve all! It is what we desire at our core, it is what God wants for us, and it is what is awaiting each of us and all of us as ONE.

“Life has no meaning. Each of us has meaning and we bring it to life. It is a waste to be asking the question when you are the answer.” – Joseph Campbell

But here we have the true issue of humankind. Oneness which is so sought after and desired by what seems like every soul on the planet yet not fully accepted. In all actuality it is being used against the rise of planetary vibration and transformation. We are being sold a false state of oneness from our governments and authorative figures. In the name of Oneness we are allowing our rights and liberties to be taken from us. Through the use of fear tactics, unseen shackles and the illusion that someone outside of ourselves is going to save us, take care of each of us and lead us to salvation we sheepishly remain blind. The truth of transformation and the healing of our planet will only come when WE are willing to see EVERYTHING. As one becomes more awake, one also discovers that there is more pressure to deal with the areas of our lives that we have been avoiding. These areas are our blind spots. Ego has carefully hidden them out of our sight. As Michael Berg states, “A person is able to see ALL flaws, except his own.”

Consciousness only has two choices in the evolution that is upon us: to join in with the flow or to resist the flow. In joining and proactively fighting the ONLY fight worth anything (the fight for Unconditional Love) great miracles can emerge upon our planet within this 3D illusion of life. Through consciously awakening, allowing ‘death’ per say to wash over us, we will discover a New Life in a higher consciousness. There are many beautiful, healing ideas forming and manifesting within our world. Crusaders walking the difficult path of their purpose; knowing that each person that they touch in love and assist on their journey of conscious rebirth thus too pushes ‘us as a whole’ toward the light. Our planet Earth which was at one point in time full of light has been through a struggle and has experienced the rule of Satan (Ego Consciousness or Desire for the Self- Alone), but now we are at the brink. We are transforming once again. There is not ONE individual that will not embark on this journey. The only decision we have for the self-alone is if we will accept this beautiful metamorphosis and willingly abandon fear, doubt, control, and all states of ego or continue to align our physical, mental and emotional bodies with selfishness, which will only bring into our state of reality chaos, pain and suffering.

“If our realization is not complete, it’s prone to be used by ego as a construct to hide behind, and as justification for lots of unenlightened behavior.” –Adyashanti, The End of Your World

Will YOU decide today to be the change you want to see in the world? Or will you cave to selfish fear, desire for the self-alone, doubt and the biggest illusion of all, Control over God?

View all photo’s from The Purpose of Humanity Naked Musing in my Ecstatic Studio