Life Lives Through Us For No Other Reason Than This.

“Emotion rising up,
I can feel it strong in my chest.
Tears want to stream from my eye’s
and escape down my cheeks.
My heart is beating just a bit faster than before.
I am nervous,
I am excited,
I am feeling out of control of the situation.
I can do nothing to help truly,
but be arms to support
and words to hopefully lighten your heart.
Your fear.
My sweet,
I love you so dearly.
And all I can do is tell you this.”
 
It is moments such as this,
that I find myself being reminded of how powerful life is,
how it grabs hold of us and let’s us know it’s hunger.
It hungers for our depth.
It hungers for our passion.
It wants us to claim the moment.
To be present
and attentive.
 
This is where life LIVES.
 
These moments,
fleeting and yet lingering,
as they happen to each and every one of us.
We dance in and out of fear.
Even in the most beautiful space that we might find ourselves,
even in the moments when all that we have worked for
finally seem’s to be manifesting,
fear comes in.
It bares itself to us and makes us aware of how small we are.
How timeless each moment is,
how delicate each breath can be.
Our teacher.
Our conqueror,
it is there by our side.
A friend and foe.
 
And what must we do to escape it’s grip?
There is only one thing,
in any moment that must happen for us to awaken to our truth and lean out of the hold of fear in our life.
 
We must,
with certainty,
and no doubt,
we must feel deeply and know who we are.
For at our core,
at our deep soul level is where we discover all.
It is here in these caverns of our true self that we find all the armor that we need,
which is not armor at all,
but instead a revealing.
An allowing of our true divine selves to be unmasked and revealed, in true raw authenticity and truth.
 
Yes here,
here is where we rule.
Here is where we find our strength.
In all moments in life,
we are meant to expand,
we were born to breathe,
and to feel life living through us.
Only in our unmasking,
and accepting of our depth and truth,
can we do this and conquer fear.
 
But to step firmly into living a life on purpose,
one must consistently be getting ready,
to be ready.
 
And what does this mean?
 
To BREATHE.
To do the mindset work,
to consistently challenge ourselves to be all of who we are.
Not side stepping our truth,
not hiding from our feelings,
not masking our light.
 
No we might have been born to run,
but not to run away from life.
Only to run into its arms,
to have it wash over us,
and through us in each moment of our experience.
From our first breaths to our last,
life is here to cradle us and move through us.
Our only mission is to be it’s vessel in it’s eternal quest to feel what it cannot without us.
 
Yes,
moments such as the one that is breathing through me right now are what expands our potential,
opens our hearts,
teaches us our strength,
and reveals our soul.
 
Moments are all that we ever have.
And each moment is a footstep on our souls journey.
The end will be the arrival back to it’s beginning.
Full and complete.
Expanded into more.
Life living through us,
for no reason other than to feel.
 
And here my love,
is what you must remember,
the desire you feel in your heart,
deep down into your bones,
the passion,
the fear,
the certainty,
the courage,
the vastness and the tightening,
it is all your soul,
begging you to become your truth.
And just FEEL.
Allow yourself to FEEL GOOD NOW,
as your soul desires,
where all your dreams can be realized.
 

As always,

Stop Existing & Start Living

“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

 
Want to learn how you to can activate a life on purpose?
To live your calling, that deep soul mission.
Where life is magical and your dreams are being realized.
 
Let me take your hand beautiful and show you the steps to reveal that F-ck Yes! Lifestyle NOW.
 
Explore my Prosperity Lifestyle Coaching for Entrepreneurs or ANYONE who desires to stop living Average in their work, love and life.
 
 
Photographyinwonderland. credit for picture. Thank you for the beautiful artistic shoot.

What Makes You Giggle? Do Share. It Is Vital to Your F-ck Yes! Life

[jwplayer mediaid=”9421″]

To live with a child like soul. 
What does that statement mean to you?

To me….
It means to allow the silly in.
To not be fearful of play.
To embrace your day with enthusiasm and joy.
To get loud.
And passionate.
Let yourself be seen.
And LAUGH.

And most importantly to JUST BE YOU.
You know when a child starts to grow up and loose their life? Its when they get serious about who they are to be instead of who their soul proclaims,
When they start to worry about grades more than happiness and connection,
When they question not what makes them smile but how they are perceived,
When they avoid getting dirty instead jumping in the puddles.

This is when a child starts their transformation into the land of zombie adulthood.

I don’t believe this has to be true.
Back in the day….
Like when I was 25 and taking life so serious.
As a mom of 3 youngster’s back then,
I thought that being a good mom meant that I could not be me.
I thought i had to act,
Dress,
Speak,
Cook,
Etc. Etc.

A certain way.
Because the true me was not good enough.
Wise enough.
Stable enough.
Or anything else.

I thought I had to be more.
Someone I was not.
And I drove myself batty trying to achieve this version of someone that was not real.
A d so far from my soul.

But I looked like I had it all together.
LOL

Fast forward 18 years…
Now a 43 year old mom of 7 babies.
Soon to be grandmom or mimi as I am goin’ with,
And I am still serious.

Serious about BEING ME!
And that means there is no version of me,
Other than just who I am in any moment.
How I choose to show up in my life,
To live,
To raise my children,
Has NOTHING to do with anyone elses opinions or ideas.
It has everything to do,
With FEELING GOOD.

And what feels good?
To live outloud.
Passionate.
Playful.
Silly.
Enthusiastic.
Turned On.
And I now laugh.
At everything.
Especially me.
And my kids.
Like this little munchkin in this video.

Folks.
Its so effing powerful to tap into that inner child.
That inner child dreams.
Believes in magic.
Loves life.
And themselves.
And is fearless being themselves.

All the things needed to be a bada*s in life and THRIVE.

So tell me love…
Share in the comments here.
What makes you giggle?

As always, 
Stop Existing & Start Living
Coaching for Grown A*s Believers.

Let’s talk about accessing your SOUL.
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Clarity and Space.

Clarity and space. 
Sometimes you just need one of these to get the other, 
and the other to get one. 

The thing we must acquire in life in order to manifest all that we desire and want is a feeling of satisfaction. 

How do we achieve this though?

Through clarity and space. 

I don’t know if you are anything like me, 
but I often find it difficult to ask for what I need. 
Not for what I want, 
but for what I need. 

There is a difference. 

I have a difficult time asking for what I need because I don’t want to be a bother to those I care for. 
I tend to mother all over everyone in my life and big sister the rest. 
Call it only child syndrome?
Or oldest daughter syndrome?

But I tend to find myself in moments where I am so full that there is no room for God to give me any more. 
I find myself in spaces where I can take on no more. 
My mental, emotional and even physical space is dangerously low. 

Kind of like my cell phone and computer like to tell me frequently about their space too. 
Hmmmm….. maybe that is the universe telling me something huh?

And the issue with being so full in life is that it is hard to have clarity. 

It is harder to find satisfaction with things. 
And it is even harder to manifest the things that you want because simply put….

there is no effing room for them!

Well, here is where I have been the last 90 days. 
OMFG!

I am so full. 
I feel like I have eaten Thanksgiving dinner in every breath I take. My body feels heavy. 
My energy feels stagnant. 
I am in a spiritual food coma. 

Or an abundance coma. 
Where things are now knocking at my door and then looking in and saying, oh no,
No….no….no….. 
you are a hoarder of all that energy. 

You hoard giving too much .
You hoard not saying no when you need to or want to. 
You hoard not asking for space. 
For time. 
For this or that. 

So, now you get to sit there and feel full. 
Oh, so full and unsatisfied. 

So like any good manifesting queen, 
I go after what I want. 
I am a smart woman. 
I know how to do this thing.

And so I go ask for what I want some more. 
And I ask some more. 
And I “claim to be taking time for myself” 
but instead I am really off giving time and energy to someone I care about. 
Putting my focus on them. 
Giving a sh*t too much. 
And allowing my time. 
My energy. 
My space. 
My boundaries. 
To just get trampled for the sake of love….

Or so I claim it to be that. 

But truly its not about love. 
It is about me not wanting to look greedy. 
Not 100% believing that I am worthy of asking for my needs. 
Not wanting to let anyone down. 
“Cus God forbid that I let someone else down, right?”

And then after all of that, 
you know what happens?

Frustration. 
Fear. 
Loss of energy. 
Loss of focus. 
Clarity.
Sanity. 
And I find myself feeling lost. 
Feeling hopeless. 
And feeling like none of it matters anyway. 

And so what is the answer?

How can one in these shoes get back to stable?
How can one move from this overfull state and get into satisfaction?

Pretty simple love. 

Just demand SPACE.

Move yourself into a state of space. 
Away from all who are calling on you, 
even if they mean the best by their checking in, 
even if they are sharing love, 
even if they are concerned and wanting to help. 

Move the F-CK AWAY from them and get some SPACE. 

Realize that that is the ONLY way that you will be able to have what you want. 

And to feel satisfied and get manifesting your dreams. 

You don’t have to step away forever. 
You just need a vacation. 
A detox. 

Space.

So just ask for it. 
And if you suck at asking like I do. 

Then let that only child syndrome that some of us have surface in another way and stamp your feel and pitch a fit and DEMAND IT!

Because darlin’ you are worth it. 
And your dreams are too. 

As Always, 
Stop Existing & Start Living
” Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

Who Will You Be In 2019?

Who will you be in 2019?

Here is the question that my mentor asked me recently.

At first when I heard it I wanted to jump to the answer. 
I wanted to confidently state all my dreams and goals as though they were already. 
But as I sat with this question, 
truly sat with it and allowed it to settle into every cell of my being I could feel great emotion bubbling up with it.

I could feel myself not simply wanting to state with confidence my dreams and goals, 
No, I wanted far more than this.

I wanted to truly feel myself expand. 
And I was already being gifted this beautiful idea of expansion in being asked,

Who will you be in 2019?

And here is what I came up with.

I will be a woman on fire, 
on fire for her life. 
I will be a mother, 
present, in love and compassion, 
showing my children how to live fully, 
and how to fly.
I will be a lover, 
learning what I truly want for this next season of my intimacy. Committing to my true heart and core.
I will be a thought leader, 
helping those who feel aligned to me to expand who they are and tap into the f-ck yes life they deserve.
I will be the soul crusader that I have always known that I am. 
Never allowing for settling, 
willing to rock the boat, 
to stand in the face of that which is uncomfortable and THRIVE.
I will be a content creation magician, 
open to my aligned intuitive desires and letting them unfold in ease.
I will be SOUL ALIGNED, 
I will be ONLY a F-ck YES to myself, 
at all cost.
I will live from a place of ease, grace, gratitude and joy.
I will be vulnerable, open and turned on.
I will be SOULFUL.
I will be magnetic.
I will be AUTHENTIC.
I will be deliberate.


I will be a mother f-cking bad a*s!!!!!
I will be a Rock Star in my business and in my life!

The truth is love, 
my goal is to make 2019 a year that I am so effing proud of that I cannot help but brag about.

And what is wrong with that?

I know that some people cringe at the words, 
brag and proud or pride.

I know that it may sound cocky to say that this is my desire, to be a F-ck YES! only to myself.

I know that to some, 
who I aim to be for 2019 is not desirable, 
and the thing is that I don’t really effing care.

And neither should you love. 
because who you are. 
Who you want to be. 
Who your soul is screaming at you to get into alignment to becoming, 
is most likely not going to please the majority of people.

And the sooner that you get right with this fact. 
The sooner you realize that when you firmly, 
confidently and unapologetically step into your true self, 
that the majority of the world will not approve.

And the reason,
although it does not ultimately matter,
I will share with you for clarity and understanding.

The reason so many will hate on you.
The reason so many will mock and point, 
will show their cruelness and even shun you. 
Is because your light will be so F-CKING BRIGHT that it will reveal to them all that they are hiding from and do not have the courage to become.

Yes my love, 
the more you SHINE
the more the haters will make themselves known.
The more the darkness will try and take you down.

The average and ordinary, 
never like the ones who CHOOSE to LIVE UNBOUND.
The ones who choose to be free, 
to be turned on, 
prosperous, 
and in SOUL ALIGNMENT.

SO know this my love, 
know that as you answer this question for yourself, 
that the only right answer, 
is the one that makes you squirm, 
makes your feel as though you are hanging on the edge of cliff and taking in all the beauty. 
It is the one that makes you shudder, 
not from fear but from the thrill, 
the thrill that you are FINALLY being a F-ck YES! to yourself.

Ignore all those naysayers.
Ignore all their threats. 
Ignore all that they may throw at you, 
and walk forward into this year. 
This year of your GREATNESS. 
This year where you make yourself proud.

Let your LIGHT be seen brightly.
Let your SMILE beam in joy.
Let your LAUGHTER shake fear into their walls of misery, 
as you BRAG in GRATITUDE
of this F-ck YES! Year.

As Always, 
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers!”

Stop fooling around and take the leap that you know that you need.

Stop with all your excuses. 
There are 51 weeks left in 2019, 
how many more will you let pass with the acceptance of lat years attitudes for this years life?

Let’s get you kick started with Boss Life-500
Take advantage of this signature VIP 1:1 Coaching opportunity NOW!

I only have a couple spot’s still open.

And This One is Yours.

Getting Ready to be Ready.

You don’t always have to vibe high. 

You really don’t. 
Some days you have to just accept that your vibe is off. 
That you are feeling hormonal. 
That you are feeling tired. 
Overwhelmed. 
Scared.
And done with the world. 

Some days are like this. 
You ladies out there may understand this a bit better than the men who follow me. 

But its very true. 
Some days you are just low as f-ck vibe. 
And you know what?

It’s OKAY!

There is no soul on this planet that does not have off days.
There is no soul that vibes high ALWAYS. 

Sure they may only show the high vibe. 
But they are not high vibe always. 

The trick to low vibe days is simple. 

Love yourself anyway. 

This is grace folks. 
And I know how hard it can be to allow yourself to be human. 
To allow yourself to just have a low frequency day. 
Especially if you are anything like me. 

I personally pride myself in being able to handle so many moving pieces, 
in not falling apart at the seams under the pressure of life, 
and able to get a massive amount of sh*t done when it seems like I should not be able too. 

It feels good to me to look at my world and see all that I have done. 

Yet some days, 
some days this is not the case. 
Some days I look around and I go OMFG! I think I will just climb back in bed and hide. 

These sorta days, 
I just want to cry. 

And you know what sometimes I do. 
Sometimes I just feel this suffering that I thought up and I allow myself to fully step into the pile of fake sh*t and even bathe in it. 

As much as it stinks, I allow it to happen. 
I allow myself to torture myself with a low day of emotion, 
and I drag my ass across the floor in low vibration. 

Why the eff would I allow this sorta energy to manifest you may be asking yourself?

Well, you see it is simple. 
I have embraced the fact that I am human. 
I have come to terms with the reality that what goes up must come down. 
And that there is beauty in the storm. 

There is a cleansing that happens during this low vibration. It allows for us to empty ourselves out some so that we can breathe and take in more. 

If we just keep trying to fill ourselves with more and more stuff, then at some point we start wasting our blessings you could say. 

When we start to waist our blessings, we can no longer open any further to receiving and so we have to make a choice. 

a) continue to let our cup overflow and waste, thus feel the overwhelm and anxiety of not being able to take any more in and crash from this weight. 

b) pour a little out and receive a little more but then quickly get back to overwhelm and overflow. 

c) tip ourselves over. Empty ourselves the f-ck out, and get ready for the downpour of blessings. 

The trick here is in the being ready to be ready for the blessings. 

This is the hardest of things and yet so simple. 

In order to expand out to that next level of receiving, 
in order to fully take in all the things that we have asked for, 
we must have room for them.

Right?

Pretty logical.

But when we empty ourselves, 
we feel strange, 
we feel naked, vulnerable and revealed. 
We feel scared. 
We feel uncertain. 
We feel as though there is something horribly wrong and we start to try and fill the void with whatever we can. 

This is no good. 
By just looking to fill the void, 
we do not grow. 
In sitting there and listening to all the garbage that comes up from the conscious decision to empty ourselves, we expand. 
In breathing into the uncomfortable feelings of the void. 
And staring our own darkness in the eye, 
we grow. 
And if we look hard enough, 
listen to that voice in the stillness, 
we will begin to feel our truth more. 
We grow. 
We expand. 
We open.

As we lean more into this, 
listen with greater intent, 
we have more desires come to the surface. 
Each desire is a light. 
As we send these desires out into the universe, 
excitement starts to birth from them , 
and we are NOW
getting ready to get ready. 

Because we are still not ready. 
We are still in the darkness. 
And our ego’s are still popping in and causing us to fear, 
to doubt, and make us want to run. 

The storm is upon us in these moments. 
We feel its chill, 
we watch it rain down. 
And we wonder if we will survive. 

Will we sink or swim?

We will swim as long as we open ourselves up. 
Much like swimming, 
if you curl into fetal position while trying to swim you pull yourself in and go under. If you flip yourself over onto your back where you no longer pay attention to that which you fear the most and open your arms, arch your back a bit and take a deep breath, you float. 

Here is where you want to be. 
In ease and grace. 
You can float through the storm. 
But you can only achieve this is you open and breathe it all in. 
Keeping your eye off what you fear and instead look upward to the heavens. 
See the beauty in the clouds, feel the breeze and let it wash you clean. 

You may be still low vibing, 
but you have made a conscious choice to open. 
Therefore you are getting ready to be ready for all that is coming and instead of the low vibe taking you under, 
you in turn have found how it can be a space to relax into and just simply float. 

Here you discover a new kind of flow. 
The flow of love and grace for self.

The flow of the low vibe. 
The flow of accessing your growth.
The surrender to emptying yourself so you no longer gorge yourself with blessings, but cleanse yourself and prepare for all that wants to be shared with you next. 

In these moments take your mind and eye off of everything that might seem to need to be done and in turn allow yourself to just feel. 

Embrace the void, love.
Here is where you grow and are getting to be ready to receive.

As always, 
Stop Existing & Start Living

You have wanted to work with me forever.
You desire the F-ck Yes! Life.
Money. Success. Health. Romance. Freedom!
But something has been stopping you.

Finances?

I was listening.

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h

Never Stop Manifesting The Cup of Coffee

About 20+ years ago I started focusing in on the law of attraction.
I wanted to take charge of my manifesting and I wanted to create the life of my dreams.
Having always been spiritually focused,
and enjoying quantum physics for my pleasure reading,
it came to me that this thing known as the Law of Attraction might be worth investigating.
After all there was a history of exploration around it.
Anyone who has ever read Think and Grow Rich, or any of Napoleon Hill’s work as well Earl Nightingale, Dale Carnegie or Norman Vincent Peale just to name a few greats, I am sure would agree that there must be something to this law.

Through the course of time,
I have had many a positive and a negative experience with the law. The thing that I have had the toughest concept with was personal responsibility.

Yes responsibility.
We are each responsible for what is coming into our manifestation zone.
What we are attracting to us.
It is difficult to take responsibility for the crap that manifests in our lives.
I am sure that you would agree.
It is hard to look at these things and say with certainty and even enthusiasm,
“Yes! I did that. – I attracted that. – I own it.”

I mean how often do we want to own the random flat tire,
the hot water heater blowing up, the car accident, the personal injury, the job or relationship loss?

We never want to own these things.
yet this is where the power of our manifestation is seen and we MUST pay attention too.

I will even go to the level that we should be excited about the sh*t that manifests,
as it shows us that we are manifestors.
And damn good one’s at that.

Owning our power means that we do not ignore any manifesting that we have going on for ourselves.
It means that we have to be just as full of gratitude for the free random coffee that we manifested to the flat tire.

It is all us.
It all came from our thought vibration.
And this is where we learn our truth.

Are you sitting there, reading this and agreeing?
or are you disagreeing?
It does not matter BTW.
It just is.

That is the thing about universal laws.
they don’t care if we believe in them or not,
they still happen according to their design.
It is up to us to become conscious and start making use of them to our consistent benefit ( manifesting what we perceive as positive) or remain unconscious and just let the cards fall will they will.

It is up to each of us.

However, if we choose to CLAIM OUR LIVES,
if we choose to move forward toward the F-ck Yes! Life,
then we MUST become conscious of this law.
We must start to own all of our manifestations,
not just those that feel good to us.

I so often hear people say,
“So I started using the law of attraction 5 years ago.”

LOL….
This cracks my ass up.

“Started using…”
Honey, you were born using the law of attraction.
You use it every moment of your life.
You use it in your waking hours,
you use it in your sleeping hours.
You use it when you are pooping,
when you are eating,
when you are having sex,
or an argument.
When you are paying your bills,
or when you are on vacation.
There is NEVER a moment that you are not using the law of attraction.

It is about THOUGHT VIBRATION.

And if you “think” you are “thinking the right thoughts” but crap just keeps manifesting in your life,
then guess what?

YOU ARE STINKING THINKING.

It is not rocket science baby.
It is a universal law,
a law that is based on the frequency that your thoughts are sending out.
That is it.

The ONLY other component that matters to it,
is how you feel about these thoughts.

The emotions attached to these thoughts.

If you are sold hook line and sinker on the fact that you will always be living pay check to pay check,
or that you will never find love,
or you will never have the body you want,
or whatever it is that you are CERTAIN that you cannot have,
then guess what baby?
You are right.

And feel that feeling,
that sensation in your body as you think about not having it.
Feel that anxiety,
that sadness,
that disappointment,
that anger.

If you are waking with a subconscious thought that is affirming that you cannot have,
and you wake with one of these sensations,
then it should just make sense that you not manifest ANYTHING other than things that support these feelings.
So you pour hot coffee on yourself,
you break a dish,
you scratch the side of your car,
your shoes don’t feel right,
you feel bloated,
etc.
etc.

The opposite is true to though luv.

If you wake with a feeling of gratitude,
a feeling of love in your heart, ‘excitement for the day,
for life and all that you can make happen.

If you feel into how good it feels to wake up,
and KNOW that you are the CREATOR of your world,
that you are so supported.

So very supported.
The whole universe wants to give you what you want.
What you are VIBING TOO.
So all you have to do is BE HAPPY.
And more things that make you happy will manifest like magic into your world.

F-ck YES!!!!!!

This is the F-ck Yes!! Life that I coach on.
This is what I help people every day achieve.
This is the life that I wake to daily,
and if I don’t then I consciously make up my mind to change my VIBE ASAP.

Today,
today is like any other.
Today I woke,
I was tired, but I stretched and said my gratitudes before my feet hit the ground.
I moved on through my moments of motherhood,
of taking tired kids to school,
I dealt with my ex and christmas items,
I looked at some bills,
and I drove in rush hour traffic to take my daughter almost 2 hours away to state testing for homeschool.

And you know what?
I walked into the conference space that her testing was at,
fifteen minutes early,
I laughed and connected with the ladies who were setting everything up for the students and a few moments later,
one of the women said,
” Excuse me mam, would you be interested in a white mocha latte from Starbucks? It is untouched. I ordered it on accident for someone who is not here. Do you want it?”

F-ck Yes!!!!
A small manifestation.
But showing where my VIBE is.

I said yes and gave my thanks.
I opened to receiving.

I said yes.
And gave gratitude. (KEYS to receiving more)

often in the start of awaking to the law of attraction,
we are told to just go manifest a cup of coffee.

I want to say,
NEVER STOP MANIFESTING THAT CUP OF COFFEE.

Your belief of your power starts and is consistently supported here.

So what will you manifest today?

As always,
Stop Existing & Start Living

If you are ready to make the leap then reach out to me today. I am running a Christmas special where you get 2-months of coaching for FREE. Check it out and use the SANTAGIFT code in the why you want to work with me section. HERE

90 Days of No Orgasm- Say What?

“My body is tense and tight as are my emotions and heart. I feel little love, appreciation or compassion let alone toleration. Or perhaps that is all I feel. I am tolerating life. I am tolerating work. I am tolerating my family.  There is no feeling of interconnectedness, no desire washing through me.  I feel lost, alone, depressed without reason, fatigued and sore. I feel loveless and angry. I feel an ever growing panic inside of my soul. As if my life is being stolen and for what?

The smile on my face and my light-hearted attitude that everyone sees is far from my internal reality where it’s more like being trapped in the swamps of some limbo land of the forgotten. I am unseen, unheard and feeling unworthy. Unworthy of being seen, heard, loved, sexed properly, or even cuddled and nurtured. Sure, I can reach out to my children or girlfriends for emotional support and snuggles, but this is not what my soul craves to keep itself alive. No, my soul craves to be held safe in the arms of the masculine. To be loved, adored, cherished and ravished to the marrow in my bones and through every last cell of my physical being. My soul craves with ever expanding fear to be penetrated mentally, physically, spiritually and emotionally by the masculine. It needs to weep and laugh while singing its orgasmic rapture before my lover. It needs to feel safe while opening into the darkest corners of vulnerability. It needs to feed like a ravenous vampire on the love that can be expressed and felt during gourmet sexing. It needs to be felt with every tilt and pulse of my pelvis as I wrap my legs around my lover and pull him deeper where he has no choice but to surrender and bow at my alter. Where he can no longer deny my passion, my thirst for him and for life. My soul needs to burn. It needs to be ignited and seen. It needs to be felt and embraced in return.

Alas, this is not the case. Instead my soul is dying. It is dim and lifeless. It lives in its own shadow of a time since gone. Instead I feel numbness that is not numb but painful. My body is over ridden with what feels like a plague. I question existence, purpose, and reason. I question my worth. Looking inward I see a woman who is lost and feels like life has been stripped away, yet there is still a glimmer of hope. This glimmer is hungry, it wants so badly to be strong and to push forward. It wants to feel again, to live again, to heal and most of all it wants to breathe.

 

90 days is a short time line. You can do anything for 90 days, right?

90 days is a extremely long time as well. It can change your whole chemical, molecular being. It can retrain your thoughts and it can open you up to the vastness that life has to offer, or it can shut you down and make you question life.

90 days can heal you.

90 days can torture you.

It only takes 90 days to turn a turned on woman into a woman who is under-fucked, bitter, numb and on the verge of hysteria. How do I know this? Because I am that woman.  I am that turned on woman in the spot light, leading others to a turned on state of being and I am also that under-fucked woman crying out from the shadows of the dungeon of hysteria begging for mercy. That mercy being orgasm.

Orgasm use to come to me so easily. I could easily have 20+ orgasms in one love making session. I would experience clitoral, G-spot, cervical, female ejaculation and emotional orgasms just to name a few. They would course through my veins and roll through my body with ease, feeding me. Leaving me fulfilled and with so much to give to the people and world around me. I felt youthful, alive, confident, connected, passionate, full of desire and certainty. I could move through obstacles with faith and love. “

90 days of no orgasm sends you in another direction though.

29 things that 90 days of No Orgasm Gets You- My Personal Observation

  • Irregular periods
  • Heavier menstrual flow with more pain and moodiness
  • A constant feeling of female blue balls- aching in my pelvis
  • Less fluid stride in my walking
  • Decreased confidence
  • Depressed
  • Anxious
  • Headaches and body pain
  • Decreased immune system- keep getting sick, always feel sick and cannot get well quickly
  • Fatigue
  • Increased hunger
  • Weight gain
  • My once clear skin now has numerous acne breakouts
  • Feeling of hopelessness
  • Zero desire for anything
  • A short fuse – limited patience/toleration and understanding
  • Once clear head now has mental chatter
  • Breast tenderness
  • Zero libido
  • Emotional out bursts
  • Crying almost daily
  • Anger that creeps into rage
  • Fear to move forward with things
  • Lumps and tender spots on or around my pussy
  • Vaginal dryness
  • Random Yeast infections
  • Sensitive vaginal skin that tears easily
  • Pain during and after any sexual play
  • A feeling of disconnectedness to everything including my children, family, lover and friends. As well as G-d.

This may seem crazy to many who read this. How can all of that happen to a woman just from not having orgasm in her life?

But it does.

Science has been proving for a long time that orgasm is a vital nutrient to the feminine. It helps keep us women stabilized, positive and connected. In my practice I work with many women who have not had an orgasm for years, possibly even a life time. I also work with women who have become addicted to clitoral orgasms but believe or have not had anything deeper than this. Keeping them in a quick fix mode of orgasm which is often the case in female masturbation practices or even in our sexing.

Ancient spiritual based practices, dating back 7,000+ years spoke and taught on how important orgasm, real orgasm not just climax was to the feminine. It goes far past our physical well being and even our psychological well being. Orgasm is the well spring of creation and connection to the divine. To God. When we women do not have true orgasm in our lives and a space to surrender to our lover and our orgasm then we turn off to life. We disconnect from our partner, from our world and from ourselves. We move from the embodiment of self and radiance to living in our heads and just “dealing” with this thing called life. Life becomes about the duty instead of the living.

Unfortunately, we live in a world of under-fucked women. I say under-fucked not to sound crude and that women “should be” fucked, but to make the point that women do need to be held in a space for a long enough time frame with a safe masculine that can stand in her fires, in her tears and in her orgasm. This masculine can not be forced on her. He must earn her. Earn her trust. Her heart and her orgasm. This is not a space that many men are familiar with nor have they been taught about in todays society. However, when the chosen masculine is there holding this space then the woman can release into the greatest depths of surrender with herself and with him, thus creating the feeling that he has fucked her wide open to the universe. It is in this space that the feminine gets filled with love and with orgasm to her core. All other concepts of orgasm are nothing more than illusions and hoaxes.

Clitoral orgasm is a masculine orgasm. It is sharp, quick and what I call fast food. It feels good for the moment but that is all it gives you a moment and you find yourself hungry and feeling empty shortly thereafter. It also trains the body and mind to accept less than what is possible. Once we believe that this is all that orgasm is then many never think to venture further down the path to find true fulfillment.

But this is us settling for something that will never be anything more.

In todays society and way of thinking we claim to desire so much yet few are willing to go out and make their desires a reality. We settle for the lessor car because it is economical, the lessor house because the school district is what we think is better, the lessor relationship because it is better then no relationship and he/she is nice. We settle for the lessor orgasm because we don’t know that there is anything better and we don’t have the time to get it. So, we settle.

I could easily be writing this about masculine orgasm as well, however I am not. Focusing on the feminine because this topic is near and dear to my heart and my pussy. The above share is my truth about a time that I went longer than 90 days without orgasm. I had to learn how to surrender to myself in other ways to escape the lack of orgasm that I had in my sexing. I had to rediscover myself and my passion in other areas to ignite my orgasm again so that I could have it. I had to lean into my pain and fear and face them with love for self and life. I had to go back to the roots of my desires and start there. FRESH.

This is the path that every woman who is without true orgasm must take. The answer to connecting to an orgasmic life is to learn how to surrender to life. To embody yourself and to discover your core desires.

I share this musing with you in hopes that you will do just these three things and give yourself permission to live the orgasmic, turned-on life that you deserve.

3 Keys to Opening Up to Your Orgasm

  • Daily practice pussy communication. This is a foundational practice to reconnect you to your pussy. If you are living in your head then you are not embodying yourself. If you do not get back into your body then you will have limited to no sensation and you are blocking yourself from your divine feminine as well. Meaning that you have muted your intuition. Intuition is an art of blending voice of spirit with feelings and physical sensations of the body. By focusing on communication with your pussy on a daily basis you will tap back into your truth and feel more led by your core. Things will start to work out in your favor more and you will also start hearing your voice of desire again. To do this exercise all you need is a quiet space and your hands. Take your left hand and place it on your heart, your right hand and place it on your pussy. Now just breathe deep into your stomach, pulling the breath down as far as you can to allow your tummy to expand. Hold the breath for a moment and inquire with your pussy, “What message do you have for me?” From here move into a dialogue with your pussy as you focus on your breathing and feel for the sensations that she has to share with you. Ask her questions such as, “How do you feel about this relationship? – This job? – This move?” etc. Then listen to the sensations in your body. Your body’s wisdom is your soul speaking to you about what is best for your highest and greatest good.
  • Vulva Love Practice. Set aside time each day or at very lest 3 times a week to do this goddess practice. Set up a space that is pretty to all your senses. If possible, do this practice outside a few times with the sun shining down on your pussy. Create a sacred space with smells, music and different textures that you enjoy and find relaxing. Allow yourself to relax into this space as you gently massage your vulva with your favorite oil (I suggest unscented coconut oil). Make slow strokes and really allow yourself to feel all the sensations of your fingers running across your pubis mound and vaginal lips. Massage and stroke for feelings of pleasure NOT orgasm or climax.  Notice how good it feels to just feel the soft, conscious touch.  Next stroke with the intent of love and appreciation. With each stroke say out loud or internal words of love and appreciation to your pussy. Speak of her beauty. Her ability to receive pleasure and give pleasure. Her ability to manifest life. Speak of her warmth, her velvety softness. Remember to say thank you to your pussy for all that she has given you and that you value her guidance in your life.
  • Pussify Your Life. In this exercise you only need to ask your pussy for her feelings about something. This is a beautiful practice to focus us women on embodiment to self, something that many of us have lost in our modern world. To start and give you a feel for this practice, take on your under-ware and bra drawers. Take each pair of panties out and one by one hold them up to your pussy. Now ask, “Do you like this pair of panties?” Then feel what sensations come up in your body. Notice your emotions around each garment. If you have anything other than a strong F-ck YES! To the garment then toss it without question into a get rid of pile. Do this with all your panties and then move to your bra’s. If you want to really pussify your world, move to your closet and clean it with the guidance of your pussy instead of your logical brain. The result is that you will find yourself with ONLY garment that make you feel good. You will clear out all the things that you thought you needed for some logical reason or have been holding onto to be smart or out of fear of not replacing it. When you do this, you will now not only be honoring yourself and your emotions, you find that you are more turned on to life and feeling better about what you look like as well.

You are a divine, beautiful woman who deserves orgasm in her life.

For you to have all the orgasm that you want, sexually and generally in life, you MUST own your ORGASM and open to fully receiving the blessings that the universe and your pussy have for you.

This is a decision though.

Do you want a Turned- On Life?

Do you desire a life full of rapture and blessing?

Do you crave a fairytale relationship?

Do you desire gourmet sex?

Then choose YOU!

Choose Orgasm.

Choose to EMBODY YOU.

–KW

Are You A Fuck Yes to Your Full Potential?

“The ONLY place you need to be – is in your magic zone. We all have a magic zone. We all use our zone. All the time. The trick is being conscious to what we are creating and making sure that our magic zone is being used for all the bliss, joy, play and abundance it was intended instead of the suffering, fear, destruction and chaos so many of us choose to use it for. — What are you creating?” – KW

fuckyeah

Be Your Full Potential This Coming Year!

Here we sit yet once again at the end of one year and the ushering into another. You would think that the whole world would be truly celebrating that we as a world society get to move forward into the next arena of life on this planet. You would think that each and every soul on this planet including yourself would be ecstatic with joy and hope for the new year and all it has to offer. After all new years is all about getting a fresh start. Having learned what we needed from the past year we can now move forward with an excitement and expectation of greatness. However it is more common for for us to be experiencing pain, suffering, fear, anger, remorse and almost a desire for this time to not move forward but to somehow reset to the beginning of the current year so that we can travel through it with 20/20 vision and make different choices, see things differently, and act differently.

For more than 80%of the population we may have a desire to make this new year one of all our dreams coming true, or at very least sticking to most of our goals and making some positive life changes so that we can feel accomplished at the end of the day and year. We desire that the feelings we are having and trying to ignore through too much alcohol, food, partying and random excessive entertainment with games and television, we desire not to ignore these feelings but to simply NOT have them to begin with. Therefore we desire CHANGE. Transformation.

There are so many people in my life that I know are experiencing these sensations. I have seen people go through divorce this years end, have been served papers for it or finished a long process with it. Many uncertain as to the standings of their relationship status. I have seen many people loose their jobs, their homes, cars. Not have enough food on their tables for nightly dinner. There are many who I know who are dealing with death this season in one way or another and even some that have been diagnosed with a terminal illness and find themselves feeling like they NOW don’t have the time to give and share all that they thought they were going to be able too. I have seen people question their purpose all year long. I have seen people try and make their purpose their relationship. I have seen people dig and get mad to the point of quitting because they have no clue what to do with what is surfacing and they have no idea how the things coming up serve them healing what they had originally set out to work on.

I have also seen many people discover love. Purpose. Direction.

Everything that I have seen has NOTHING to do with what we choose to typically focus on at this time of the year. That being how many presents we got or gave, or the deal we got or even the president of the USA. None of the things that truly matter are the things that our media or lifestyles has us focusing on.

The things that matter are REALLY SIMPLE.

The bottom line for every human being is the same.

We ALL WANT HAPPINESS.

Everything that we do is an attempt to achieve this sensation.

We change or stay in a relationship because we hope it will make us happy.

We keep a job or strive for a new one because we hope it will lead to happiness.

We exercise and change what our diets are to loose weight or firm up our bodies, not because we truly care what we look like, but because we are hoping that the look and feeling of our bodies will make us happy in some way.

We learn new things to bring more joy into our lives. Weather that is through experience or money.

We offer our helping hand not because we truly believe that it is needed, wanted or should happen (although we convince ourselves of this) but because we hope that in our pursuit to be a “good person” that we will be happier.

EVERYTHING – everything, that we do is about OUR happiness.

So why is it so damn fucking hard to actually do the things that will truly make us happy and give us ever lasting change and the creation of our FUCK YES LIFE?

Why do we choose to find excuses as to not do the things and get the help that we need in life to make the life that we desire?

You know it is said that if you desire something, that the thing desires you as well. In other words, the things we crave at our soul level are calling to us and asking us to do the things that we need to do to grow ourselves and create the consciousness required to connect to our desires.

Each and everyone of us has a the same ability to make the choices that we need to make for ourselves to create the life that we want for this coming New Year.

*

lifepotential

The only real question’s you need to ask yourself are these:

What are your top 1-3 areas of change/transformation that you know you need or want to work on in this new year?
What is the long term impact of not making these changes?
If things stay the same what does it mean to you and what does it look like?
What is different NOW compared to 6 months, a year ago, five years ago?
What is your commitment level to yourself to make these changes?

What is the ONE thing you need to do in life to die happy?

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Make this year a year of your full potential.

You deserve your greatness to be revealed.

It is truly fucking time to STOP playing small!

Our world needs YOU!

I can tell you that the world needs more men, women, couple’s turned on, vibrant, living on purpose and by their desires.

The world needs people who are transforming the world through their passion for life. This is ONLY done through opening up NOT to more work – but more PLAY.

More PLEASURE.

The ONLY secret you ever need learn to have the life that you know you deserve and desire is the lesson to ALLOW YOUR OWN PLEASURE.

We have had our ability to receive pleasure in all forms taught right out of us. Our world is so focused on living by scarcity and taunt economics. No great thing every happened without allowing for some deliberate slack. In the slack we prevent the hyperactivity of our minds, energy and drive. In hyperactivity we loose fun, pleasure and joy. Everything becomes work and we cannot breathe or flow.

When we embrace that “slack” equals room to change. Room to grow. To create. We then open the doorway to the creation of our desires.

We gain compassion, understanding, direction.

There most certainly is an art to living in your bliss. But it is a most delicious process. And for those of us who choose to transform our lives and therefore the lives of all on this planet through pleasure, play and happiness we KNOW that it is a venture well worth moving into.

But it requires Your ALL.

Are you ready to make this a year of your full potential?
Are your ready t o have the Fuck YES Life you deserve?
Are you ready to live out the year having the relationships, the sex, the money, the career, the travel, the health that you want?

This and MORE is possible.

Take my hand and take the plunge into your GREATNESS!

jamaica3

Email me about being in the Pre-launch group for my New Fuck Yes to Life Coaching – and discover the top 10 focuses you need to play with to have the life you desire in 2017!!! DON’T Wait. The Pre- launch pricing will only be offered to the first 50 people who si

The Serenade of the Boogie Monster

“Humankind has not woven the web of life. We are but one thread in it. Whatever we do to the web, we do to ourselves. All things are bound together. All things connect.” – Chief Seattle, 1854

I am always amazed at how these Naked Musings come about. If I believed in coincidence then I would say it was such, but I don’t believe in coincidences so instead I look at all events (moment to moment in my life) as signs. Everything that comes to us may we perceive it to be good or bad is perfect as it is, fore in these moments great lessons are being provided for us.

Many years ago I can recall a time that I was extremely judgmental. I remember sitting at my mother-in-laws house in Northern California and listening to some gossip about my sister in law. The tale was that she was having an affair on her husband, my husband’s brother. The family was in uproar at this and I felt as though I should be too. After all it was sinful. She had broken the oath of marriage between her and her husband. She had betrayed him with another and then she denied it. Another sin most likely being set before her jury, all of us who were worthy of casting these stones.  There we sat judging her for her actions, condemning her in every way possible. But as it states in Matthew 7:1-6 Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. A lesson I was soon to learn for myself. Unhappy in my marriage, lost in my life, and out of love with myself it would happen that temptation would fall at my feet a few short years later. Here a man that actually irritated me but could make me laugh found his way into my heart at a deeper level then just the friend that he had been for a few years. He was a strongly religious man as well. As if that matters when our souls want to taste life and bliss without the constraints of society.  Yes as though we were on a dance floor we found ourselves twirling in the blissful, fun adventure known as an affair. At first I too denied my guilt. I lied to my family, to my husband. In my mind I told myself that it was best that I do not share the truth as it would be to harmful, to painful for them. I was doing them a favor and protecting them. In truth I was fearful of the judgment that would come, from them not from God. In my gut when I asked myself if this event would cast me into outer darkness or have me dancing with Satan I knew that God loved me and that the only punishment that I would ever really experience from this life event would be that from which I opened myself to and put upon myself. I knew also that I had brought this upon myself, not from making love to a man that I enjoyed and brought me many a memorable spiritual moment and gifted me with much beauty but because I was so harsh in my judgment of my sister in law. Here I had set in motion my lesson. My task was to have compassion for her and for all. My task was to love myself just a splash as much as the Creator loves me. In this I would discover freedom and salvation.

If we each could just embrace that we are the creators of what is to come. It is also in our perceptions that we manifest how we experience the world. If we choose to hold ill feelings toward anyone, including ourselves then we find ourselves in chaos, suffering and separated from love.

We experience negative emotion when we come into a point of view that is in disagreement with the point of view of our Creator. Meaning that our ego has gotten us to deviate from that which our higher self, our “Light” knows. In other words if you could hate someone and your inner being empathizes in that hate and joins you in it you would not feel any separation from the Light (creator) and you would not experience any negative emotion. But you do!

Negative emotion is a vibrational contradiction between the way of ego and the love of the Creator. So if your inner being, the God within, your Christ Consciousness (whatever you choose to call it) will not join you in one adverse thought what is the truth behind the theory of a day of reckoning? Why do we feel that we can cast stones and live in separation from the light but that those who according to our perspective are acting out of accordance with the laws of the land are the real sinners and should “pay” for what they have done?

How is that we come to believe that the God that we strive to love and please so deeply could hate? It’s implausible and we know it is so at our core. Fearing god? Do we want our children to fear us or to love us? Do we want to destroy our children’s lives or to support them and teach them how to manifest lives of abundance and happiness? Made in the image of the creator shares the truth that the concept of fearing God is not of Divine intention but of the ego. It is a form of controlling spirit while it is experiencing a physical life. The only thing fear does in its control is cause suffering. Truly by succumbing to the concept that God judges or disapproves of us in any way sets our lives into chaos and ruin.

I will allow you to control my behavior to suit your needs by using this fallacious boogie monster in the closet. This is what traditional puritan cultural views from rewritten texts of sacred codes want us to believe so that we are passive, paralyzed sheep instead of the Divine beings that we are!

We are free Light beings. What is true freedom though? Freedom is the releasing of control. Recently a sweet Goddess I know shared a symbolic event with me. She was watching some birds in formation flying. As they flew they held formation but within a second they broke free, they took to the skies in their own directions, gaining individual perspective on the land. Birds are wonderful teachers, they understand unity and how together they can travel and be carried faster while experience less struggle because they are united in flight, yet they also allow for individual freedom of experience without judgment.

Freedom is the releasing of control. The releasing of fear and the coming into alignment with the creator, with that inner being of light.  As we allow ourselves to become free we increase our vibration and align perfectly with the creator, the God who loves us and has and always will love us. This loving creator at the time of our conception knew that in this physical world we would have to experience contrasts and that this experience would assist us in our expansion. Unlike the Creator whom is limitless we have broken away from our ability to embrace fulfillment and our divine limitless birth right by imposing ego based structures upon ourselves and expecting these structures to protect us and to control the free nature of others as well, thus causing us to become prisoners of our ego based desire to be righteous for the sake of pride instead of being righteous through grace and unconditional love as that of the creator.

When we look at the doctrine of so many religions for the love of God we are in fact looking away from it. It’s when we are told by these dogmatic rule based controllers how we are to be that we have to pause and take notice of what our heart, our gut is saying. Is there something that just makes you feel unsettled? Unloved? Not accepted? Judged if you were truthful about who you are or what your life experience has been? That nasty pit in your stomach at moments like this is your soul saying that if you buy into these ways that you will be disallowing for the fullness of the love, the worthiness and the peace of the Creator which you are a part of. When you hear these cries of spirit and you learn to attune yourself to this perfection of love instead of the suffering of ego NO ONE will ever be able to persuade you to live out of soul integrity again.