This is what you want in a partner.

From Guest Author Addison Bell

It’s all fun and games until you actually have to deal with the other side.

You sit and desire certain characteristics of those in your life, and especially out of a romantic partner. Yet, I daresay that many times you are asking for a mess of contradictions.

Its easy to look at some aspirational values and personality traits and think that this is exactly what you want to pull into your life but if you aren’t careful you will end up pulling in exactly what you don’t desire.

And the funny thing is that your Ego would probably throw a tantrum and say, “But I do do desire it, I do want that, I can hold that person” but in the end you really can’t handle it.

You might desire someone who is playful and has that flirty personality that makes you feel all bubbly inside… until they are flirty and playful with others and it smacks right into your jealousy and trust issues.

You might desire someone that knows how to act like a “lady” or “gentleman” when you are out in public and can hold the proper level of poise… until they are always poised and never able to let go of that persona (even in the bedroom).

You might desire someone that has their own life and is more free flowing with the relationship. Someone that isn’t that awful word “clingy”… until they can’t be there and support you the way that you need and you never truly feel held.

And really any trait that you desire in a partner is going to have the opposite side.

It is pretty commonly known from a psychological perspective that in relationships the aspects that often attract you to your partner are also the very same aspects that can cause the greatest struggle.

There is that old saying about how men should want a lady in the streets and a freak in the streets.

We want our partners to be both sides of a coin….
And most of the time it can mean the destruction of a relationship!

Now, thankfully we are complex beings and so are not one thing or the other. If you take the above example of having a lady in the streets and a freak in the sheets… I know many women that are able to present one aspect of themselves when out at dinner parties and then turn around and have a mind-blowing sexual evening with a partner. Both are authentically them and both are aspects of who they ae.

Though these women have also worked through the stereotypes that come with both sides of the coin and know where they are authentically.

Though, lets be honest, yes I mean really honest here…

Most people are NOT doing deep personal work on a daily basis. And most people are not willing to look at when their ego’s arise in relationships. So when an aspect that is a turn on in one sense becomes a turn-off… we blame that other person. We don’t look at ourselves and where WE might be the ones that have unspoken expectations.

Many times we even struggle to admit where we struggle in relationships and where our ego’s simply can’t handle something.

You want a partner that is free, playful, open-minded but then when this pushes on your jealousy, your need for attention, and your belief that there is a certain way to “do” relationships…

Can you actually look yourself in the face or actually look that other person and say, “I don’t want you to be so free”. “I wish you weren’t so playful”, “I want you to be open-minded but just not about this topic”.

Most would look at the other person as the issue and not be able to truly say… “I am not able to hold this aspect of you”.

Again, we are complex and hold so many intricacies. Each person, situation, and experience will present a different expression of self. So what fits and is a desire with one partner or relationship could be entirely different than what fits and is a desire in another relationship.

In truth it all comes back (as always) to self and looking deep within ones self authentically. What are we desiring in our relationships? And then looking at if we truly could hold that characteristic in another if it presented to us. Where would our ego get shaken? What are non-negotiable in our relationships?

If you want freedom… how free?
If you want play… how playful?
If you want stable… how stable?
If you want sexy… how sexy?

What can you truly, honestly, at your core hold?
Get honest with yourself! And start doing your inner work to help you be able to look within when situations arise.

And more than even that…
Get honest with self when someone presents something that truly won’t fit with you and your life. Don’t pretend to be okay with something that is a hard NO. This will only push you further and further out of alignment from self.

Most importantly LOVE self first and foremost. When we do this we are most able to be authentic, honest, and love another. Even if the way we are loving that other is by letting them go and be who they are authentically.

Sending you all…

Love, Light, & Blessings,
Addison

Love Hurts Some Days

Love Hurts Some Days.

“My chest hurts.
It is tight and full. 
It is harboring a pain that I do not want to feel. 
It is this haunting level of fear. 
I sit here staring into the fire, 
with a prayer in my mind, 
with uncertainty in my being.
And a sensation of knowing.

Not the sort of knowing that any of us want to have. 
No a knowing that something is wrong.
My gut is in knots.
My back is tense.
My chest feel like it is being stabbed.

The burning.
The burning of flames that I am lost in mediation will do nothing more than give visualization to the tremendous amount of heated pain that I feel. “

This was my journal entry just yesterday. 
The shocking reality that I was hit with through the last week of my life was just how deeply I cared for someone that I have been resisting.

And the beautiful opportunity that has been presented to me to heal my own heart and also another’s yet again in this saga I call my life.

Love f-cking hurts some days at a level that we cannot fathom. It grabs a hold of us sometimes in a flicker, makes us warm and full of butterflies. Then at other times is creeps its way in and lingers in the shadows of our doubts and fears only to make itself known when the feeling of true loss rises up. Then we are given the chance to confront our feelings, to step into the love and to vocalize.

Once vocalized we are then given yet another opportunity for growth and love to expand even more.

We are given the opportunity to stand in it.
Yes to stand in the love and NOT run from it.

This can be one of the scariest experiences. 
Because we have to come into the reality that we are feeling something. That we have a true fear of loosing this person in our lives and that it is okay to feel it.

The fact that this triggers us in such a fashion is evidence that it is doing healing work on past wounds around love, abandonment and unworthiness.

Everyone wants to be loved. 
Everyone wants to be cherished.
Everyone wants to be felt, seen, heard. 
And everyone desires for someone to just simply give a shit enough about them to miss them.

I don’t do a lot of missing people personally. 
I live pretty unattached, letting everyone I care for and love live as they need and without me impressing my needs upon them too much. I aim to be strong enough in myself to not necessarily need anyone to fill me, but instead to add to the fullness I already have.

I love deeply. 
And as a I was just sharing with a lover the other day, those who love me deeply back and I share a level of full being intimacy with and unconditional love with will NEVER leave my heart. I will forever be in love with them no matter how the relationship evolves.

This is where the unconditional aspect comes into play.
It is based from not needing anyone, but instead accepting the gift of their love and giving the gift of our love back.

Because that is what love is : A GIFT.

And it cannot be forced. 
It cannot be made to happen according to how we perceive it needs too.
It is just a gift that is given over time and within a second.
It is just a gift that can only be felt when we are truly present with our own hearts enough to experience the offering of another’s.

Yet we lock ourselves up in these neat and tidy little boxes. 
We hide from our hearts out of the fear of getting stung by love. 
We fear that what we want to gift will not be reciprocated or appreciated and even worse that we are not worthy of being gifted it back.

This is nothing more than triggers of past hurts keeping our emotional armor up and preventing us from opening to the gift.

Love it offers us pain and pleasure. 
It teaches us about our depths, 
it teaches us about our darkness, 
and it shows us our light.

I have been sitting with multiple things the last few days based on a love scenario.

As I sat without knowing if my love was safe, was well or where they were in this world I found myself first and foremost deeply concerned for their well being. I questioned myself about any feelings of past abandonment creeping in and I was a hard core no to that as I trust this persons integrity pretty firmly. When I leaned into my heart and into my core ( my genitals as I reefer to them as my GPS a.k.a intuition) I felt that this was not a goodbye or a run away but something dealing around well-being. So I focused on that concern. Feeling helpless, I chose to investigate as much as I could and to try to get the answers I needed to set my mind and heart at peace.

God would soon come to my rescue as usual.
Gifting me with a confirmation of life.

Once solved I found myself now dealing with an old belief and wound around worthiness of love, around abandonment and around my expectations on my relationship.

Stepping back away from the ego based thoughts and just witnessing them do their dance of chaos. Today has been breathtaking and filled with personal growth to say the least.

Because that is all that is happening. 
My thoughts have decided to join a circus and put on a show for me, begging me to take part in the main ring.

Yet, if I do what I know is right and just lean back into my heart, my core ( my genitals as I reefer to them as my GPS a.k.a intuition) I regain my truth. And the truth is that I love this person and I do not need them to love me back. I do not need them to show up in any special fashion. I do not need them to do anything other than be who they are. The person that I fell in love with a few years ago. And what my GPS system is confident of is that no matter where the relationship evolves to, sharing my love and basking in theirs has been a GIFT.

So yes, love hurts on some days. 
It can give us the greatest of pleasure and the worst of pain. 
It reveals to us all side of our personality and ego.
But if we allow it to truly penetrate us. 
To truly conquer us what we are gifted is far greater than what anything else will ever provide.

What we are gifted is an expansion in self. 
A revealing of our truth to our core. 
To our soul level. 
And we are gifted a union with the divine.

Here in the space of true unconditional love we meet ourselves and learn that through the presence of love we have everything that we will ever need and we never need look any further than our own back yard.

For all that we crave resides right here within. 
It is in our acceptance of self that we embrace this world and love deeply those whom we share it with.

I love you.

As always, 
Stop Existing & Start Living

-KW

God is living vicariously through YOU.

God is living vicariously through YOU!

Yes you read that right.
God is living out what God cannot do on his own. 
He needs YOU to do it for him.

Crazy huh?
But look at this thing called life.
It is all about experience. 
It is all about learning. 
Evolving.
Expanding.

Life is a beautiful gift.
And it is a gift that has been given for us to enjoy to the fullest. 
On top of it we have all the power. 
It is called FREE WILL.

What an amazing gift.

And you know what else?

It was given so that we can experience and expand to our greatest levels just like God does.

God is everywhere.
God is within everything.
The conscious creator of all. 

But the ONE thing God cannot do, 
is LIVE as a human. 

Which means God cannot experience like a human.
And God wants glory.
God wants love.
God wants respect.
God wants joy.
God wants our rapture.

Just like a lover, 
God want to bask in our beauty.

And therefore God wants to feel our full expression in everything that we do. 

You want to give God glory?
You want to show your worth?
You want to show God how deeply you love him?
You want to show your FAITH?

Well the best way to accomplish any and all of these, 
is to fully turn yourself over to the mystery.

Let GO and LET God.

This is where FAITH is shown.
Live unbound and to your fullest, 
this is where you show God’s glory.
Live in complete unconditional love, 
for self, for life, for everyone, 
Live authentically, 
this is where respect and love come from.
It is called integrity my sweet.
Live prosperous, 
Be wealthy.
Be sexual.
Be orgasmic.
Fall in love.
Laugh.
Play.
Allow abundance and blessing to wash all over you.

Because God is counting on you.
God wants to FEEL all of these mysteries.
But he needs YOU to open up and let HIS GREATNESS move through you. 

You are not doing anyone any favors by playing small.
Seriously, how is always accepting less,
always saying no to your heart and soul, 
always turning away from yourself,
serving YOU OR GOD?

It’s not.
Let imagine if Jesus turned away from himself. 
Turned away from God.

Lets imagine if Jesus coward in the face of his own greatness, 
which he KNEW was all God’s.

Lets imagine Jesus being small.

LOL…
That’s just silliness, 
right?

He took on the weight of everything.
And he did it in JOY.
He did it by revealing unconditional love.
He walked in FAITH.
And he let his fathers GLORY be witnessed by all. 
He did this by letting his light SHINE.
He did it by letting God work through him.

Because even the son of God, 
had to open himself to the mysteries of God. 

Had to open himself to the POWER of God. 
And what was the message he left us with my love?

“I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” – John 14:6

The message is clear no matter your faith.

If nothing else, Jesus was a man of leadership and deep understanding of the ways of God.

He was on the mission to reveal the truth.
And he stood in the power that he had been given.
He let his light shine.
And he has made it into our history and spiritual beliefs for over 2000 years because of his teachings.

So why not LISTEN?

Why not stand in your own RIGHT.
In your own POWER.
And Let God move through you. 
Let his glory be seen, 
by living your life UNBOUND.

No FEAR.
No DOUBT.
Only CERTAINTY.

Because God is counting on YOU my love. 
God wants to experience this thing called LIFE, 
but he does not want to just get through it….

Hell NO!
He want’s to THRIVE in ABUNDANCE.
He wants the JOY, 
The PROSPERITY,
The LOVE, 
The ORGASM.

So stop effing around already. 
Stop living in shame and misery.

You have all that you need on your side love. 

Just LET GO.
Leap.

Leap into the arms of the greatest lover of all. 
Leap and let God catch you. 

He wants to feel your rapture.

As always, 
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

Stop fooling around and take the leap that you know that you need.

Stop with all your excuses. 
There are 51 weeks left in 2019, 
how many more will you let pass with the acceptance of lat years attitudes for this years life?

Let’s get you kick started with Boss Life-500
Take advantage of this signature VIP 1:1 Coaching opportunity NOW!

I only have a couple spot’s still open.
And it is YOURS.

Who Will You Be In 2019?

Who will you be in 2019?

Here is the question that my mentor asked me recently.

At first when I heard it I wanted to jump to the answer. 
I wanted to confidently state all my dreams and goals as though they were already. 
But as I sat with this question, 
truly sat with it and allowed it to settle into every cell of my being I could feel great emotion bubbling up with it.

I could feel myself not simply wanting to state with confidence my dreams and goals, 
No, I wanted far more than this.

I wanted to truly feel myself expand. 
And I was already being gifted this beautiful idea of expansion in being asked,

Who will you be in 2019?

And here is what I came up with.

I will be a woman on fire, 
on fire for her life. 
I will be a mother, 
present, in love and compassion, 
showing my children how to live fully, 
and how to fly.
I will be a lover, 
learning what I truly want for this next season of my intimacy. Committing to my true heart and core.
I will be a thought leader, 
helping those who feel aligned to me to expand who they are and tap into the f-ck yes life they deserve.
I will be the soul crusader that I have always known that I am. 
Never allowing for settling, 
willing to rock the boat, 
to stand in the face of that which is uncomfortable and THRIVE.
I will be a content creation magician, 
open to my aligned intuitive desires and letting them unfold in ease.
I will be SOUL ALIGNED, 
I will be ONLY a F-ck YES to myself, 
at all cost.
I will live from a place of ease, grace, gratitude and joy.
I will be vulnerable, open and turned on.
I will be SOULFUL.
I will be magnetic.
I will be AUTHENTIC.
I will be deliberate.


I will be a mother f-cking bad a*s!!!!!
I will be a Rock Star in my business and in my life!

The truth is love, 
my goal is to make 2019 a year that I am so effing proud of that I cannot help but brag about.

And what is wrong with that?

I know that some people cringe at the words, 
brag and proud or pride.

I know that it may sound cocky to say that this is my desire, to be a F-ck YES! only to myself.

I know that to some, 
who I aim to be for 2019 is not desirable, 
and the thing is that I don’t really effing care.

And neither should you love. 
because who you are. 
Who you want to be. 
Who your soul is screaming at you to get into alignment to becoming, 
is most likely not going to please the majority of people.

And the sooner that you get right with this fact. 
The sooner you realize that when you firmly, 
confidently and unapologetically step into your true self, 
that the majority of the world will not approve.

And the reason,
although it does not ultimately matter,
I will share with you for clarity and understanding.

The reason so many will hate on you.
The reason so many will mock and point, 
will show their cruelness and even shun you. 
Is because your light will be so F-CKING BRIGHT that it will reveal to them all that they are hiding from and do not have the courage to become.

Yes my love, 
the more you SHINE
the more the haters will make themselves known.
The more the darkness will try and take you down.

The average and ordinary, 
never like the ones who CHOOSE to LIVE UNBOUND.
The ones who choose to be free, 
to be turned on, 
prosperous, 
and in SOUL ALIGNMENT.

SO know this my love, 
know that as you answer this question for yourself, 
that the only right answer, 
is the one that makes you squirm, 
makes your feel as though you are hanging on the edge of cliff and taking in all the beauty. 
It is the one that makes you shudder, 
not from fear but from the thrill, 
the thrill that you are FINALLY being a F-ck YES! to yourself.

Ignore all those naysayers.
Ignore all their threats. 
Ignore all that they may throw at you, 
and walk forward into this year. 
This year of your GREATNESS. 
This year where you make yourself proud.

Let your LIGHT be seen brightly.
Let your SMILE beam in joy.
Let your LAUGHTER shake fear into their walls of misery, 
as you BRAG in GRATITUDE
of this F-ck YES! Year.

As Always, 
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers!”

Stop fooling around and take the leap that you know that you need.

Stop with all your excuses. 
There are 51 weeks left in 2019, 
how many more will you let pass with the acceptance of lat years attitudes for this years life?

Let’s get you kick started with Boss Life-500
Take advantage of this signature VIP 1:1 Coaching opportunity NOW!

I only have a couple spot’s still open.

And This One is Yours.

Open to Me.

When I think of you I smile.

You know it is true.

You know who you are.

And why it is so.


When I think of you I feel all warm and happy.

You can hear my joy in my voice.

You can feel me in our conversation.

You know who you are.

And why it is so.


When I stand in your presence,

my heart soars with love.

I know that you feel me.

I know that you want more.

And you know who you are.

And why it is so.


When I find myself in your arms,

head against your chest listening,

each beat of your heart makes me wish to go deeper.

The feeling of safety, the feeling of depth,

I value my surrender to you,

and I want more.


I know that you can feel me.

I sense it in everything you do and say.

I know that you crave me.

Your goal to penetrate.

mind.

heart.

soul.

My whole being.


When you touch me,

my flesh ignites with passion and joy.

My body wants to open,

I know you can feel me.

I know you want more.

And with those words,

delicate yet firm.


“Open for me.”


Is all I ever need to hear.

It is your confidence.

It is your desire.

It is in your expression.


I can feel you my love.

I do no doubt this journey.

I do not doubt this feeling.

I am reveling in all that we have.


This moment is all I desire.


I can see how you look at me.

I can see the wanting in your eye.

The words that you share,

that you think,

but hope I do not hear,

yes those words my love.

I have absorbed them.

As they are your’s ,

and revel in them too.


Oh my sweet love,

this moment can last us forever.

A thousand lifetimes if we allow it to be so.


This moment is all we have.

And I want to spend it with you.


But how can we move forward?

How can we say I do?

When fear still exists between us.

When we are lost in our hopes,

insisting on something new.


Your words keep me focused.

Your words are the key.

Yes my love,

the wisdom is right here before us.

It speaks to us when we unite.


“Open to me.”


Is all we must allow.

It is the answer to our love.

The answer to this moment.

And to the next one as well.


“Open to me.”


and let me receive you…


Here my love is where we will dance.

Here is where our home is.

No further than the space between our bodies,

our energy meets.

Our hearts are entangled.

It has been so for awhile.


Longer than we may admit.

Our hearts have a desire.

Our bodies yearn for more.

Our souls are guiding,

and so our minds have been made up.


But will our voices ever say the words?

Will we be heard by one another?

Or will be dance in this moment,

wanting for more,

but fearing we may never.


“Open to me.”

and let me receive you.


Receive you fully.

Drown me in your love.

As it is all I want to drink.


And revel in it I will.

This moment.

This lifetime.


The silence is deafening.


——————————————————————————
For all those lovers who have drank from the pools of their hearts,

who have longed to be felt as they feel their lovers.


Who have lost,

who have been absorbed,

who have danced and are still dancing.


The beauty of this thing called love.

Its desire to be present in our lives,

making itself known,

fleeting at times,

it is all that we humans crave.


The unconditional.

The passionate.

The intriguing.

The deep.

The vulnerable.

The romantic.


All of the love.

We want it.

And we fear the loss of it.


The answer to having is so simple.

The answer is here in these words.


“Open to me.”


Yes open.

Open to the love.

To your lover.

and to yourself.


Surrender without reason.

And revel in the moment.


For love,

no matter how long it may last,

is always worth the moment.


Blessings to you my sweet,

may you enjoy a lifetime of love.


And as always,

Stop Existing & Start Living


ONLY a few days left till Boss Life- 500 Closes.

I have two spot’s still open for this f-cking amazing opportunity to work 1: 1 with me and get your 2019 kick started into greatness.


But maybe you don’t care.

And that is okay too.


I am just telling you that this is an AMAZING AS F-CK opportunity to get the private signature coaching that you might want and most certainly will need if you want to level up your life for 2019.


So yes,

I am telling you to stop what you are doing right now, go to this link right HERE
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Stop giving excuses.

Stop saying you can’t do it for whatever reason.

Just stop with all the crazy nonsense that your fear has you blabbing and

SAY F-CK YES! to yourself baby.


CLAIM YOUR LIFE in 2019!

Claim your life right now.


Register and learn more NOW

Damn You 2018! But Thank You.

🍾🥳🎉🎉Happy New Years Eve Everyone!🎉🎉🥳💞

As we go through the last day of 2018 and we enter 2019, I wanted to share some thoughts with you about the bullsh*t that might be holding you back.
And I say all of this in love. And I say it all with the intimacy share that it is true for myself as well.
Stepping into a new year is always a time of contemplation for myself. Perhaps you feel the same, perhaps not.
But I find myself sitting here this morning, drinking my coffee, enjoying the crispness of the morning and playing with our families new little puppy while I ponder all that has taken place in this year of 2018.
Recently I shared that I was in gratitude and happy with where my life is RIGHT NOW. That I was happy with 2018 and all that it has brought with it. And this is true, however I still find myself looking at the year and saying from my depth, “Damn You 2018!”
I am witnessing this same energy and statement from many people that I know, work with and follow. 2018 has been a testing year.
It has tested us in all ways. Physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually.
And financially for many.
For myself I look at this last year and I can honestly say that I did not see many of the things that occurred coming. I started last January pumped up and excited, anticipating the closure of a separation with a man that I loved deeply, but I “thought” that he would turn toward me, instead he chose differently and with that came new sight into his heart and our relationship. It was a breathtaking and eye opening experience. Turned around and found myself with my other main man flipping out and revealing where he was as well, which lead to physical trauma and financial stress. Watched as my 82 year old mother with dementia went deeper down the rabbit hole of this disease and made choices that were irreversible making it where I no longer to care and support her the way that I once had, to the point where she even ran away from the home that she was living.
Brought on with all of these challenges of 2018 I found myself needing to find a new home ( and did so within 3 days) , get a new car ( and I did so within a week), get healing for my physical body ( which I did with the love and support of my fellow practitioners and friends), get legal help ( which I did with the guidance of God) and wade through the upsets and the trails that would seem to never end.
Yes 2019 with your over $75,000 of additional costs that I did not expect.
You have taught me so much. This single mama still remains strong, happy and in love with her life. In gratitude for all that 2018 has brought, even though it has been some rough lessons.
How can I even have gratitude some ask?It is simple: My life is blessed.I am in love with where I am. I am in love with the truth that has been revealed. And I am in love with myself.
2018 has shown me who I am, my strength, my courage, my fears, my weaknesses, and it has provided me with sight into my soul.


For all the sh*t that has happened in 2018, my list of gratitude’s are far greater.


*More than DOUBLED my income in 2018! BAM!!!💲💲

*Found out I am going to be a grandmother. 🙂 Holy crap its happening!!!!👶*All seven of my kids live close to me or with me.

* Have close relationships with all of my children and good friendships. ( what more can a mama ask for)

*Everyone is healthy.

*Bought my first car without anyone else attached to it. (always have had someone with me i.e. a husband or man)

*Moved into a house that I f-cking LOVE in a neighborhood that is amazing. * My kids are all in GREAT schools and doing good.

* Paid off a third of my over all debt.

*Only spend maybe 8-10 hours a week feeling like I am “working”

*Truly have my time as my time – I AM MY BOSS!

*Love my TRIBE!!!! – You are beautiful. *In love with where my business is going and who it is unveiling me to be.

*My home is always blessed with love and people who I care deeply about.

* Amazing men in my life that know how to hold space for me.

* Deep love.🥰💞💞 I truly feel deep love coming to me and being shared by me, which means I LOVE MYSELF DEEPLY.

*Alignment Awareness. This is a BIG one. I am far more conscious of when I am in alignment and when I am not and I am catching my hold backs quicker than in years past.

*A new focus on LISTENING to my intuition.👂👀 Another BIG one for me. Some days I feel psychic, and whether I am or not is beside the point, it is that I am seeing how accurate my gut is and how powerful I am if I ONLY CHOOSE to LISTEN.

*PEACE.🙏 I have spent the last decade becoming a more peaceful person, I use to be so angry and scared. But something in 2018’s lessons has truly lined me up with PEACE. It is hard to throw me these days, and even if I get a little flustered or tense, there is a current of peace right under it reminding me who I really am. Grateful I can feel that.

*THIS IS WHO THE F-CK I AM! 💃💃💃- Yes even for someone like me who prides myself for being raw and authentic, I still have masks. And I am done dancing at this masquerade ball. It’s been fun, but its time to stop fooling around and just STEP IN TO WHO I AM. This is all about the gratitude for KNOWING self and having the desire and the courage to say F-ck it! I am me. Claim my life once and for all.


Okay there is so much that I could go on and on here with my gratitude’s,
but my message to you beautiful is simple,


Look at my list.


Do you see the things that you are grateful for as well in your life?


Do you recognize the things that you need to step into and embrace?


Does any of it make you stir?Make you want for more?


2018 was here in my opinion to wake us the f-ck up!

To clear out the things that do not serve us.

To provide us with the space to call in our dream life.

We all have been too cramped in our style you could say, no room for what we want.

So 2018, bless you 2018.

You have shown us who we are.

You have helped us clean up our homes.

You have revealed truth.And you have taken out the trash that we were not strong enough to admit needed to be taken out.


So thank you 2018.


And HELLO 2019!!!!! 😍💃💃💃🥂🍾💲Let’s Rock this year with love, abundance, certainly and joy.


Let’s make 2019 about receiving all that wants to come to us. Wants to bless our lives. Open beautiful.

Open to 2019 like it is the lover you have always dreamed of and let it penetrate you with all it has to offer.


You are worth the creative loving forces of God’s blessings.
Just OPEN.

And RECEIVE.


Share in the comments what you want to manifest in 2019.


As Always, Stop Existing & Start Living


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Your Ripple Matters. So Make It Count.

“You are an inspiration to me.

You are beautiful in every sense of the word.

Look at how you radiate love into this world.

Look at all those you touch with your words.

The way that you live, so open, authentic and true.


Yes, you.

You are an inspiration to me.”

– This was written to me from a lover once.


And just today I had two men in my life reach out to share something similar.
In moments when people share how I touch them, how I make them want to be better, how I push them, and even though they may want to tell me to f-ck off, here and there, they still want more.


And you know what?That is what being inspiring is all about.

Having that more flavor in who you are.

In what you stand for.In what you do.

And how you live in this world of ours.


When we are inspiring,

we make others want for more.


And when this happens in my life, I find myself sometimes wondering…


Wondering how this is possible?

Why would someone want to listen to me?

After all, I am only human. I am only a mom, a daughter, a sister, an ex-wife, a lover, a friend, a woman who gets lost just like anyone else.

I am no one.
Right?

I often feel like I have nothing to offer.

And then God speaks through someone and says,

” Hey Kendal, you are needed. – Your words have value. – Your thoughts change lives.”


And I smile as I ponder the reality of changing lives.

Having an IMPACT.

An impact on this world.


The reality baby is simple, we are all influencer’s.
We influence someone, all the time. If no one outside of ourselves, then realize this…

we are constantly influencing ourselves through the thoughts we choose to think and the feelings we choose to have.
And when we choose these thoughts and feelings, we in turn touch others lives as well. Because it is through our thoughts and feelings that we choose how to show up and interact with others.


So we are ALWAYS influencing.


You are an Influencer.


The only question any of us need to ask ourselves is,

” What kind of influence am I?”


Am I a positive or negative inspiration.

Because you could easily be either.


The word inspiration sounds pretty.

Doesn’t it
And it can be.

But we have to be cautious in what we inspire others to believe and desire.
Your words just like mine carry a powerful message within them.


Words do not teach.

But words do make us inquire.


They bring attention to what matters.
We influence through our words.

We influence through our actions.

We influence by the way we live.


And this baby is what you need to embrace.

You must embrace that you matter.

And you must embrace that how you live matters.

You are not too small to be of value. You are not too under educated to not have enlightenment. You are not too young or old to be able to speak the truth. You are not too sinful to be worthy.


No you matter.

And so do your thoughts, feelings, actions.


You matter love.

And you must embrace this fact.
Embrace it in love.

Embrace it with fierceness.

You matter.

And so do your words.


So what does your life message say of you?

Who are the one’s that you touch with your words, actions and thoughts the most?


And how do you witness that which you share with them ripple out into their lives, and thus out into our world?


Every stone you cast has an effect on the pool of life.


Make it count.


As Always,

Stop Existing & Start Living


You have wanted to work with me forever.You desire the F-ck Yes! Life.Money. Success. Health. Romance. Freedom!But something has been stopping you.
Finances?
I was listening.


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This Man in My Bed.

The man in my bed. 
He is like no other man that has graced my sheets with splendor.
He is like no other man who has captured my essence, 
if for a flicker in time. 
He is like no one before him who thought they could penetrate my soul while f-cking my body.

No.

This man in my bed is for sure like no other.

I could tell you it’s in his moans, 
its in the way his tone changes during our sexing.
I could tell you that it’s about how he holds me, 
how he takes my hand firmly to let me know he is leading.
I could tell you its about how he tells me what he wants, 
how he wants me to wrap myself around him, 
to open to him more, 
I could tell you that its about how he massages my cervix, 
and knows how to move just right.

Sure I could say all of that, 
but none of that would be true.

The man in my bed. 
He is certainly like no other, 
and though his skill is far above most, 
his body pleasing to my touch and eye, 
it is not these things either.

I could tell you that its in his kiss, 
and let me assure you that I might have to sit and ponder, 
for his kiss is beyond measure.

I could tell you that its in his smooth conversation, 
in his depth, or in his knowledge.
I could tell you that its because he is a good mind f-ck, 
as he most certainly always make me think.

I could tell you that its because he makes me laugh, 
as he always puts a smile on my face.

Yes I could tell you these things, 
and they would add to the pool of reasons, 
as why he is so yummy.
But it would still not scratch the surface, 
as to why this man in my bed is like no other.

So let me tell you. 
Tell you now I will.

This man in my bed is like no other, 
he holds my respect.
he ignites my soul, 
he turns me on with his presence, 
and captivates me with his certainty.

This man in my bed, 
is like no other, 
he has me wanting more of him, 
he has me wanting to show up for him.

This man in my bed makes me want to earn him, 
all the while revealing to me how beautiful I am in his eyes.

This man, 
this man must have read my journal, 
he must have been given a copy by God, 
because as we lay here in my bed, 
I watch my desires unfold, 
they are handed to me, 
one by one, 
and as he leans over and kisses my neck, 
as he roams my flesh, 
as he whispers his desires in my ear, 
this man in my bed, 
in unaware.

He looks at me with a smirk, 
he inquires about my Mona Lisa smile, 
he knows I am hiding something, 
but how do I tell this man.

How do I tell him my truth?

And what is my truth anyway?

This man in my bed, 
he wants my love, 
he wants my mind, 
he wants my flesh, 
he wants me, 
fully.

And he wonders.

This man in my bed is like no other, 
and one day he may come to realise, 
that all that he wants is already his.

This man who holds me so perfectly, 
who I respect and admire, 
who I feel penetrated by with each word, 
with each look, 
this man, 
he is different than any other, 
and I tell you right now, 
he is very different.

I see more than this moment.
I desire the sunrise, 
and sunset, 
I desire more than a day, 
or even a month or a year. 
This man has me wanting him, 
and that does not happen with such ease.

Yet this man, 
this man in my bed, 
smooth as velvet, 
he has me wanting,

Wanting for more.

————————————————-
This goes out to all those men who want to turn their lady on, 
who want to know they are wanted, 
this goes out to all you gents who desire to conquer a woman’s heart and soul, 
and wonder why another so effortlessly might do just that. 
This goes out to you, 
you who want to fully penetrate your woman.
And question how it can be done.

Let me tell you the secret, 
that she will never confess.

Yes the answer sweet man is this, 
it’s in your lead, 
it’s about her respect, 
and how you respect her back, 
it amout how she can melt into you, 
how you carry her heart, 
and hold her in her emotions, 
its about the silent moments, 
and how present you remain, 
it’s about how you touch her, 
not her flesh but her mind.

Yes here is how you do it.
Here is how you make love to her. 
Learn to stroke her this way, 
whole being.
And let her open. 
And you too, ‘will have all that you want.

As Always, 
Stop Existing & Start Living

Hey there gents want to learn more about living as an extraordinary man? Want to gather the skills and confidence to show up for your woman like this?

Be that bad a*s man that you know that you are, 
but have told not to reveal to this world?

Yes, I am talking to you. 
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You Must Change Up Your Vibe Tribe.

Am I vibing with you?

I sure hope I am.

Or maybe I hope I am not.


It really depends on where you are vibing at.And I say this, because we often do not pay attention to our vibe, let alone other people’s vibe.
But I can tell you this. VIBE is where it is at baby!
If you want to have that F-ck Yes Life, If you want to call in THE ONE, If you want to have blessings wash all over you, then you better be vibing in the same frequency as them. The things we desire the most are often high hanging fruit, and this high hanging fruit will not come down to us.

And if it does…..
Then it has lowered its VIBE.And you most likely won’t want it so much anymore.
This happens in relationship all the time.
We humans have the power to increase or decrease our vibe in no time flat.
It all stems from the thoughts we are thinking, the emotions we are feeling, and thus the actions we are taking.
High vibing people, you know the one’s…

You may even be one of the one’s.
And I hope that you are luv.But either way, you may want to know how to determine if someone is high vibe or low vibe.
RIGHT?


High Vibe peep’s are radiant,

they are turned on to life,

they are self-motivated,

they do not mask life or the experiences that life offers them.

They are not living in a victim mentality.

They are proactive.

They love forward movement,

They value alone time.

They know that more is always possible.

They see the interconnectedness of things.

They are grateful.

They are grounded.

They bounce out of negative thinking quickly.

They smile – A LOT!

They are easy to be around.

They have healthy, strong boundaries.

They don’t give a sh*t what you think of them.

They are abundant.

Blessings flow to them with ease.

They are not needy, but they do desire much.

They are in integrity with self.


High VIBE is where it is at baby!

Living a high VIBE life is what you were born to do.


It is where you will discover everything that you want the most.
And you can get there.This you can.
But you are not going to get there, if you are still trying to get your needs met by everyone else who is low vibing it.
You won’t get there if you are caught in worry, or anxiety and fear.
You won’t get there if you are giving to many f-cks about everyone else’s opinions and judgements.


You won’t get there if you insist on hanging with low vibing friends, family and lovers.
And this can cause some mighty BIG issues in life, the main one being that you MUST realize that many of the people you have in your life RIGHT NOW,
won’t follow you up in VIBE.


And you will loose these people in some fashion.

So that alone may stop you.

You may not want to loose this person, or that one.

You may say it’s not worth it.

You may think I am wrong and try and drag their sweet ass along.

And you can for a bit, although the dragging of dead weight will certainly drain you at some point,

and then you will either drop them, or surrender to creeping back down into lower vibe, where life was…..


well….


BLAH.

And difficult.

Where you were not happy.

And you may say that it is worth it.

As long as you can keep these peep’s in your life, then it is worth it to be low VIBE.
And that is fine.

That is your choice.

And you will make this choice many, many multiple times throughout your life.
Just know though, that if you want to have that F-ck Yes! Lifestyle, you want abundance, deep love, and happiness.

That you will have to make changes in whom you choose to hang around.
Because the saying is so true,

“You become like those you hang around.”


So if you look at your top five people in your life, how are they VIBING?


And if we look just at the income of these five…how abundant are they?

You want to know where you are headed in the next 12 months.You will be about 50-70% of the median of these five in total.
Is that satisfactory to you?Then great.
carry on.
If not.

Time to change your VIBE TRIBE.


We all have to level up our relationships as we grow, some come back around as they grow with us in vibe, some we revisit and feel the constriction in our bodies.

While others are lost forever.
And still others Climb beside us.


What does your VIBE TRIBE say about you?


As always, Stop Existing & Start Living

If you are ready to make the leap then reach out to me today. I am running a Christmas special where you get 2-months of coaching for FREE. Check it out and use the SANTAGIFT code in the why you want to work with me HERE

Sex, Love and Fear.

Snuggles.
Intimacy.
Kisses.
Time shared.
SEX!

Mmmmmmmm….. sounds good, huh?
Sounds like something you want.
That you desire more of in your life.
Me too!

I sit here this morning contemplating so many things,
and I often find myself excavating past lessons so that I do not repeat them in current time and space.
As I analyze things, especially how I choose to do relationship I see how difficult I might be to have a serious one with.
And I do not believe that it is the fact that I enjoy multiple people in my life that is the difficult thing.
What is difficult for most is my integrity about it.
I share openly about my feelings.
About my past.
About my desires.
I share how I feel.

The issue is that we are taught that we should not want anything more than the relationship we have.
That the relationship we have is to complete us,
to make us happy, and to provide all our needs.
If it does not then under no conditions should you turn to someone else to get this met.
ESPECIALLY someone you may be attracted too or them to you.

I hear the statement,
” Be cautious of the situation you put yourself in.”

I hear the concern in this statement.
I hear the plea of if you hang around people you like, are attracted too then you may stray,
and straying equates to you leaving.
Because you have to make a choice.
Because there is ONLY so much love to go around.
Because you cannot have multiple relationships successfully.
Because it makes ME uncomfortable.

Okay, here is where I get a little uncomfortable.
Uncomfortable in my truth.

My truth is that I can NEVER go back to a way of living where I shut myself down from the world,
from other people,
and/or from men.
I f-cking love my male friends and lovers.
Whether current lovers of not, I may be enjoying time with them.
And when it is imposed on me that I need to not do this,
I feel shackles being put on me and on my emotions,
my heart,
my desires,
my energy.
And YES you better believe I will be making a choice.

I am poly my nature.
In all things I do.

I do love many.
I do enjoy many.
And may be likely to have intimacies in multiple ways with a few.

The one’s who capture my heart,
capture my essence for a season of our lives dancing together,
are the one’s who are confident enough in themselves and who get the difference between love and need.
Who can embrace my feminine wave of love.
These are the ones or THE ONE that will hold me a lifetime.

Now I am not speaking on sex here.
When I say intimacy,
I mean depth in revealing.
Sex can be this intimacy,
however sexing will only be as deep and intimate as we allow ourselves to be revealed in it.
Sex can just be that, sex.
It can be friction based and meaningless.

Sex does not mean love.
Sex does not mean commitment.
Sex does not mean intimacy.

Sex is a communication tool,
a physical communication tool .
And if you show up at only a surface level in your daily interactions with a lover,
then your sexing will only mimic the same.
Surface sex.
If you have depth, intimacy, surrender, authenticity in your daily interactions then your sex can go to this level as well,
or it can still be held in a place of disconnect if we are letting everything be heard in other ways but are scared to speak our truth in the bedroom.

Sex DOES NOT mean intimacy.
or love.

It can however deepen our intimacy and love.
It all depends on our level of surrender with our partner.

In the land of poly,
many believe that poly means to have multiple sexual partners. But this is not true,
poly is about something much more frightening than sex.
It is about LOVE.

Loving multiples.
And in love we can go deep with someone,
and we might open the gateway to sex.
Good sex.
Might I even say gourmet sex?
Because of the love,
because of the more authentic relating.

But poly DOES NOT equate to sex,
lot’s of sex,
or sex with many.

You can be monogamous in your sexing, 
and polyamorous in your relating and intimacy sharing.

And you can have success in this.
Just like you can have success in an open relationship with open sexing, or a swinging relationship.
Just like you can have success in a monogamous relationship.

A successful relationship is not about the sexual labels you put on it.

It is based on the confidence that each party has in themselves first, the self-love they have, and their ability to show up authentically in the realtionship. Which means authentic communication.

Year spent together does not equate a successful relationship.

Happiness does.
Unconditional love, and forward moving growth,
individually and together gives you opportunity to have this.

The most happy people on the planet are the one’s who have multiple close relationships. The healthiest people are the same.
Healthy mentally, emotionally and physically.
All requires intimacy shared.

Closing yourself off to the world is a death sentence in an essence.

Closing yourself off to the world and ONLY allowing intimacy to be shared with but ONE is putting all your eggs in one basket and putting an unrealistic expectation on the ONE. As well, as expecting that you as an individual can survive with only this one food source.

Because relationships are food.
They are emotional, mental, spiritual food.
They effect our body, mind and soul.
They impact us at a deep level.
And not having them does not mean that we are not effected.
Avoidance of relationship DOES equate avoidance of your heart and soul.
It is hiding from all the intimacy and truth that you are meant to share.

We hide out of fear of getting hurt.
We choose to not get involved,
to not catch feelings,
out of fear of getting burned.

If we do step into a relationship,
we then revamp our whole world and expect our partner to do the same, by not having relationship outside of the primary relationship. Often this simply means to pull away from anyone that there may potentially be “feelings” for.
And we do this out of fear.
Fear of loss.
Fear of being abandoned.
Fear of having too much love.
We close off because our ego’s affirm to us that it is not safe to love.

NEWSFLASH!
Love will not hurt you.
Love is not limited.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.” ( 1 Corinthians 13:4-8)

So why do we fear it so?
Why do we handcuff it so?
Why do we cover it with our self-centered need?

Because we do not understand.
And we equate many a thing to be love.
We fear what we do not know.
We fear what we cannot control.
We fear that we will loose if we love,
therefore we choose to turn our backs on love,
as we embrace its doppelganger of lust and need.

Authentic loving,
is authentic relating.
Authentic intimacies,
come in many ways and are what brings joy and surrender to all relationship.

Sex is never a reason to fear loss.
Love will never create loss.

The only reasons we change seasons with a relationship is because we have either out grown the relationship or have not grown to the next level within it,
or it was based on need ( not love) and those needs are no longer being met.

Level up your love life,
by tapping into your authentic self.
Embody yourself and open to love.
This is the answer to your happily ever after.

As always,
Stop Existing & Start Living

If you are ready to make the leap then reach out to me today. I am running a Christmas special where you get 2-months of coaching for FREE. Check it out and use the SANTAGIFT code in the why you want to work with me section.