I have too many tabs open.
I cannot compute any longer.
My breaker box is on overload and it’s causing me to numb out.
Just this morning I was explaining to my lover that I am a person who does not do well with a bunch of unfinished projects just sitting around. It causes me stress and if I cannot get them completed by myself, if they are out of my control then I end up numbing myself out to them and thus to life.
I love dreaming things into reality.
There is no better feeling than to witness the birth of a dream being realized.
I love seeing things being built.
watching the walls of a project go up and picking out all the little details to make it my own.
I love seeing something come into reality.
It feels good.
It feels fulfilling.
It has a certain charge to it.
And it makes you want to explore more,
dream more, feel more, witness more.
But when you get too many tabs open,
you end up with chaos.
And I don’t know about you but when my outside world has too many projects to complete and I look around,
I feel overwhelmed and anxious.
I don’t know where to start and I start to doubt myself.
All my self sabotage programs come up and I start to hear the roar of you are not good enough, there is not enough of you to go around, get your shit together, you are messy, you are scattered, you are lost.
And to a degree these programs are damn f-cking correct.
I am feeling chaotic, lost and like there is not enough of me to go around.
And so, I turn myself off to feeling it.
These thoughts create a mindset that I know at my core will not do me any favors, so it is best to just disconnect from them. Shut that shit down or go into a panic or a rage about the mess of life.
My head in these times gets so overloaded with thoughts and my internal check list is longer than you can imagine.
So I attempt to shut it all down and turn away from it.
But there is a mighty big issue with this attitude that I am prone to.
You see you don’t get to just shut down one feeling.
or one thought line.
You don’t get to just turn away from this one thing,
or detach from it and look another direction without the same distancing happening there too.
That background thought processor is on overdrive and it’s running crazy.
The checklist is flashing warning lights at you when you close your eyes.
And you wake up and what are you greeted with?
All the tabs that you left open that were draining your energy even though you closed the lid to the computer to let it rest.
Closing the lid, or detaching yourself from the list of chaos that is causing you overwhelm and anxiety can work in short spurts IF…
IF you open back up shortly thereafter and get the shit taken care of.
But if you just bounce from project to project ( tab to tab)
and never finish it up you drain yourself and never allow yourself to shut fully down to recharge.
In this case recharging means,
projects complete to you can be PRESENT in the moment with whatever you are doing to relax, to step away, to charge yourself.
This includes your sex life,
playful events, dates, experiences and just chilling with the family or friends.
Lately, I have noticed that I have too many tabs open.
And it’s causing me to numb out to everything because I am burned out mentally and emotionally with things.
I am starting to feel the spin of constant thoughts that won’t leave me to rest no matter what I try to do to step away and give myself a break.
My mind is on hyper drive.
And without rest I am having trouble being present in my life,
in my sex, in my work, in my daily yoga or just watching a movie.
This lack of presence and hyperdrive of thoughts has the nasty effect of stunting desire.
And leaves you with a feeling of, “I am bored.”
And when you are bored and desireless,
you don’t have much motivation,
much turn on for life or love or creation,
you don’t really care because caring would start up those engines of anxiety and overwhelm and your tank is empty to why bother.
So hands go up to the heaven,
you drop to your knees,
leane back on the floor and say….
Too many tabs open.
It’s not a great space.
But right now in our world, I believe that many of us are feeling this way. We have been busy entertaining ourselves with home repairs, projects galore, picking up extra work, etc, etc,
and we have been more aware of all the spots in our life that we are not satisfied, that perhaps we feel blaise, or that we are just settling, just getting by.
Our souls are not designed for blaise or getting by.
We were not born with the desire to settle in life.
We are all creators.
We are all born to LIVE.
So what is the answer to, too many tabs open and what it causes in the long haul?
Close the effing tabs!
Deal with your shit.
and then allow yourself a reboot.
Give your mental, emotional and physical bodies a break.
It does not take long to recharge,
but if you keep those tabs open and just go through the motions of taking a break then you are doing yourself a disservice.
Today I encourage you to take things off your mental list by delegating, writing it down and hiring out what you can. Looking at what you actually need to get done and what you “think” you need to get done and letting go of anything that is causing you mental or emotional stress that is NOT NEEDED.
Then DO THE DAMN THINGS that will clear your tabs.
Once that’s done, go find humor.
Go find play.
And make your work be about being present in your body.
You have not allowed yourself to embody yourself all this time because your internal space was taken up with chaos and overwhelm, but now you can.
Give yourself permission to breathe into YOU.
You are worthy of THRIVING.
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
Learn the secrets of rebooting your life and thriving with 1:1 global access coaching now. It’s time you started living fully.
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STOP YOUR DAMN STINKING THINKING LUV.
You know what I mean
You are sitting around wanting.
Craving all those things.
Desiring a life you don’t currently have,
And thinking the way to achieve it is by focusing on the not having of it.
Thats such stinking thinking luv.
Its polluting up your mind and your feelings about everything that you have.
If you really want the life you currently don’t have then realize that the only fucking way to get what you want is to apply your focus to that, that you WANT.
And the FEELING of it.
But NO EFFING way will you do that, huh.
No thats not logical.
You have this problem.
This challenge before you.
You must FIX what is broken
You must PROVE you are worthy.
It can’t be that easy to just start feeling good.
In this very moment,
To make up your damn mind to LOVE your MOFO life just as it is and feel BLESSED.
No way can it be so simple to change your life by applying your focus to being how you want right now instead of looking somewhere else,
Someplace outside of who you are and what you have.
No your stinking thinking has you believing that your happiness,
Is something you must search for.
Something you must look outside yourself for.
Something that you must work for or show your worth for.
Your stinking thinking has you focused on giving up your power to this world outside yourself in hopes that by doing so you will achieve this elusive thing called HAPPINESS.
And the sad and funny truth is that happiness is not found in things or other people.
Its found in your heart luv.
Its found by you truly embodying YOU.
But you were never taught that.
You were never shown its safe to be you.
To feel you.
Instead the lies and illusions of looking elsewhere were given to you and now the void within is so vast you feel lost.
You have the relationship,
The house and snazzy car.
You have the education.
The success and even money in the bank.
You have seen this world.
And you still FEEL empty as fuck!
You still feel lost in who you really are and it all just seems pointless at best most days.
You are so beautiful in your misgivings of this thing called life.
You are so simple in you desire for happiness and fullness.
But its your MOFO stinking thinking thats making it all so complicated.
So disheartening and making you miss the richness you already possess.
You are RICH.
YOU are ABUNDANT.
And happiness is within you.
Will you CHOOSE to see and feel it or will you continue to give your power and joy away to the illusions and grandeur of this world that tells you to focus on the problems,
Whats your decision luv?
And as always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
” Coaching for Grown A*s Believers ”
NO ONE GETS TO DECIDE IF YOU ARE WORTHY! YOU JUST ARE ALREADY.
Yes that thing that you may think you are lacking in or don’t even have any of.
But the reality love is that you were born with a massive amount of it.
So much so that it’s not in question,
not even a smidgen in question.
Not by God love.
ONLY BY YOU.
And that is what is holding you back.
It’s your lack of belief in your worthiness.
You for some reason think that your worthiness is up for debate,
that you have to earn it somehow.
That if you run around like a chicken with its head cut off that you will get more of it.
That if you live for everyone else,
and put yourself behind them all that THEN ,
then you will be a step closer to earning a little worthiness.
But even then,
even after you have buried yourself in commitments and exhausted yourself in the keeping of everyone else’s expectations and idea’s of you and for them,
YOU STILL FEEL without it.
I get it love.
I truly do.
It’s a daily battle you could say,
to wake the f-ck up and KNOW YOU ARE WORTHY without question.
But if you want all that you want.
If you are sick and tired of being sick and tired.
If you are READY to BE READY.
Then it time that you accept that you were born WORTHY AF!!!
Don’t you get it love?
God moves through you and I.
God creates with your hands.
Unfolds the evolution of this planet and its people through you and I.
This world moves forward because of what we manifest into existence.
And we can only create what we do with the guidance of SOUL.
And soul is the voice of God in us.
Together we create all that is and all that ever will be.
But is a joint work.
And because of this very factor and the nature of you and I being co-creators with God,
makes us worthy of all of our desires.
The desires that you want to manifest into existence were put there by the creator.
It is your hands,
your voice and eye’s,
that make it happen though.
It is through you that God has concentrated focus.
It is by your viewing of the world,
and you feeling of life,
and how it unfolds,
that desire is birthed.
And opportunity is seen.
As you move through this existence,
and you feel the ebbs and flows of all that can be created,
you gain a hunger for something beautiful to unfold.
You crave more.
You smile and you cry.
You get frustrated and you excited.
These are the emotions of creation,
because they birth desire.
And in the desire becoming aware in YOU,
God see’s it,
and evolution happens.
YOU WILL NEVER BE CONTENT.
You will never reach a point in your life where you desire for no more.
You will always want to create MORE.
This is the desire of God,
The greatest artist.
Working with you,
to paint a breath taking picture,
And because you are breathing love.
You need not ever question your worthiness.
Because you are hungry,
you need not ever question your potential.
Because you are feeling pushed and pulled,
you need not ever question your footing.
God is there love.
You just need to surrender to the path that is before you.
It is yours.
And in your stepping forward,
God will paint the path.
God does not make unworthy things.
And God does not work hand in hand or through unworthy things.
God is working through you,
So stop questioning so much.
Allow your blessings to flow.
And As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living – YOU ARE WORTH IT!
Want some extra support in co-creating your masterpiece?
That where God moves through me,
helping people like you who get that they are worthy AF and want to be conscious co-creators with God in the painting of a beautiful life but are still uncertain as to how to fully tap in and surrender that that they feel at their core.
Yes here is where I assist YOU.
Want to connect and say YES to YOU?
Let’s go! – You are worthy.
Message me for deet’s.