Birth Control, Turn On, Surrender and The Truth on Female Sex

He asked if I would get on birth control for him.

We were really clicking.
The conversations,
the touch,
his kiss.
OMFG! it was hot and I wanted him so badly.
I wanted to move forward and I wanted to explore the sex.
But I did not want any more children.
I had five children already and I was not interested in having any more at this point,
especially not risking it this early in the game of a new relationship.
Plus, even though something inside of me truly trusted that this man was clean,
I knew that you just never know,
and disease is a serious thing.

Weeks went by and the desire for each other grew as the days passed. Finally I decided that I trusted him enough to go bare with him in sex and that I “should” just make sure that no babies came from this,
so I went and got myself on the pill.

I had not been on birth control for the last 5 plus years, my system was clear of anything of the sort and I was feeling good. I felt emotionally stable after having one of the lowest points in my life in a deep dive into depression prior to getting off of birth control. My body was strong and I felt great in my skin. My health was awesome.

What could go wrong?

I wanted this man.
I wanted this sex,
this expereince.
The intimacy of bare sex.

And so why not make sure to guard us against the one thing that I knew we did not want.

A child.

I got on the pill.
Everything seemed normal enough for a few months.
No big red flags waving.
My moods were normal, nothing too rocky.
No weight gain or fatigue.

But then I crossed over the 90 day mark.
Then I felt weepy.
Sad.
Depression was setting in again.
Weight started to slowly come on,
just a few poundss but I noticed it.
And my desire for sex,
the reason I had decided to start taking birth control again anyway,
yeah the desire for it was dwindling.
I was feeling each day more lost in who I was.
I felt the mask I had worked so hard at letting go of,
being picked back up again.
Now instead of laughing authentically and enjoying my life,
I found myself working ever so hard just to maintain composture and not get mad or cry for no reason.

My emotions were out of control.
I felt like I had time lapsed back a decade and I could not figure out what was happening or why.
Never did I think it was the birth control.

Months went by.
My sex dried up.
I was no longer the woman that he met,
and I also found myself to not be attracted to him any longer.
It was like we were completely different people,
and I for one was for sure.

The once beautiful possibility of a lovely relationship came to an end and I found myself bouncing around with a few other quick flings,
searching for the woman that I had lost somewhere along the line and wondereing why I was attracting these men that I really did not care for but seemed drawn too.

And then,
then I stoped taking the birth control.
I committed to my health and well being and I decided that if I were involved with someone sexually that I could just use a condom and not rely on this hormone imbalancer.
Not long there after I went in for my pap-smear and was told of cells on my cervix that were irregular.
The doctor let me know her concern of what this could mean.
I did some deep detoxing and investigating on what I could do to naturally irradicate these irregular cells.
I discovered that there was ton’s of studies done on birth control and the links to different types of cancer and cell mutation.

In my research I found out that it took up to 2-years to clear your system of birth control. To my plesent surprise I I was blessed with a clean bill of health again after crossing over the two year mark from taking the pill.
PLUS, guess who was back in her own flesh.
Emotionally stable again.
Focused.
Healthy weight.
And turned on,
plus able to have good orgasms again.
Yes! I was back.

And for the first time in my adult years I had fully digested the connection between how delicate my hormones were and how easily they could be set off,
causing massive issues from depression and lack of desire, to actual cancer.

PLUS, I discovered the science showing how birth control can and does change who we are attacked too. Explaining why so often we find ourselves with someone that we typically would not be attracted too without the extra hormones in our system.

And my question came,
“Why would a man who loves a woman ever desire to put her into this situation just so he did not have to wear a condom?”

“Why woudl a woman take this sort of risk with her health?”

“Why would we willingly put something in our bodies that could change who we are attacted too and expect it not to make that big of a difference in our relationship success?”

and finally….

“Why is this never spoken of? Not made public knowledge when the facts are out there and not that hard to discover?”

The answer is simple,
We just don’t know.
We have not been informed.
And we have been focused on population not on health.
An educated person will gaurd against having unwanted children and at the same time will want what is best for their own health and well being as well as their partners, as well as wanting to be attracted to people that are a match for them verses the opposite.

But the education is not there.
And the desiree to inquire,
to seek out the truth is spoken of often but hardly ever followed.

Today I ask you to STOP the insanity of living blind in your sex and relationships and to actually inquire, witness and do your work or learning yourself, and knowing what is good for you as well as those you merge with.

This is maturity.

As Always Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers’

Message me for deets on 1:1 coaching and education today.

 

JOIN THE FACEBOOK CONVERSATION HERE

Genital Massage For Cardiovascular Health

tantricloveSensual Tantric Massage for Your Health & Pleasure: 7 Reason’s Why Everyone Should Explore This Ancient Art

Wouldn’t it be amazing if our doctors and psychologists of today actually prescribed Tantra and especially tantric massage for someones mental, emotional and even physical ailments?

Imagine walking into a doctor’s office sharing how much anxiety you are having, how you cannot seem to focus on tasks or keep life in order, how you have sleep issues and your digestion is all messed up. Imagine that your doctor after giving you a check up smiled and said, ” I believe I know something that can help you overcome these issues before they worsen and I am pretty sure you will enjoy this prescription…”

What if you had ADD or ADHD?
Chronic Pain? Irregular Menstrual Cycles?
High Blood Pressure? or Irregular Bowl Syndrome?
Hormone Irregularity? Stress? Premature Ejaculation Issues? Inability to Orgasm? Vaginismus or pain during sex?

What if you were seeking help from a counselor for relationship issues, your inability to connect to your partner or sex addiction?

First one might say “Tantra, isn’t that that thing Sting does that makes him last 7 hours? And does’nt it teach you all these crazy sex positions? Why and how can it help me with my health issues?”

To understand how tantric massage and tantric practices can fully change your life for the better and even help heal you of these and other ailments that are common to our modern day living and society, one must first know what tantra is.

Tantra has been practiced for over 9,000 years. It’s origins have been traced back to the Himalayan Mountains in India, where religious leaders believed that sexual ritual was the path to a higher form of ecstasy and liberation. Through this liberation and discovery and acceptance of pure authentic ecstasy, one learns how to “weave or connect together ALL aspects of life,” from spiritual to psychological, from emotional to scientific, from sexual to the embracing of art, music, and nutrition. Simply put there is NOTHING that is NOT tantric in life. Tantra is learning how to connect the dots and be present and authentic in enjoying the connection.

So what are the core benefits of Tantra and especially Sensual Tantric Massage and even Tantric Sex?

Several recent studies point to benefits of massage therapy that help heal the heart.

In 2008, researchers studied 263 volunteers who had a massage for 45 to 60 minutes. Average blood pressure fell by 10 mg Hg and heart rate by 10 beats per minute after one treatment. That’s about as much as you might get from prescribing a new blood pressure medication for life! (MindBodyGreen)

Now that is just from regular deep tissue massage!

Let’s Talk Sexual Massage… yes I just said sexual massage, so blush if you must but stop hiding that little smirk you have from the thought of having someones hands on your genitals for an extended time and you NOT having to give anything back to them…. Yes it is JUST for you and your HEALTH of course!

But it is NOT just about your genitals… And yet it is. The armouring of them that is…

Erections and wet pussies are just common side effects of tantric massage. There is no expectation or orgasm or climax during a massage.

That may have made your head cock to the side (no pun intended… well maybe no pun intended…) but it is true, the beauty behind this ancient healing art is that there is NO EXPECTATION.

The only focus, objective or desire in this massage is a mind/body connection which happens through the learning of body presence and interconnectedness to all of life. Your practitioner (tantric coach/teacher) does this by being the conduit and providing what is called “Sacred Space or Holding Space.” In this safe enviroment a person relaxes fully. Mind, body and spirit become one and your awareness is focused on ONLY the sensations that arise in your being on every level. I say every level here because it is not uncommon for a client to experience orgasmic sensation without the tradition expected results of ejaculation if you are a man or straight on clitorial or vaginal penetration if you are a woman (although these events may occur). It is also, not uncommon for clients to experience emotional release or even a deep meditational state of being.

So what are the KEY 7 Reasons that Everyone Should Explore This Ancient Body Therapy?

1) Tantric Therapy/Massage or even Sex is good for your hormones! Scientific evidence shows that stress causes cortisol to increase in our bodies. Cortisol does a number on every area of our being, from weight gain, to mood swings. It has been linked to even high blood pressure, impaired cognitive performance and lowered immunity. Basically it is the stress hormone and its not good when we are producing too much. Especially for our cardiovascular health.

2) Tantric Teachings/Massage and Sex improves your breathing, therefore reduces stress, helps improve clarity of mind, increases libido, helps increase stamina, teaches orgasm, and improves overall health and immunity levels. Tantric Massage and Sex acts like other similar sister practices such as yoga, Tai Chi and meditation.

3) Tantric Massage and Sex is first and foremost aimed at your emotional and psychological well-being. There certainly are wonderful physical attributes, you can expect even greater results emotionally though. As you learn to truly receive pleasure, self-esteem and self-worth are heightened, leading to a better overall happiness. You also, learn through the increased emotional awareness and release how to overcome and release past trauma which can help one to overcome such issues as Vaginismus, depression, chronic pain and many other trauma related issues.

4) Tantric Massage and Sex teaches a person(s) how to experience more pleasure by teaching how to release our armouring to pleasure. Often we have been programmed to experience pleasure in only certain ways and for only certain time frames, we then say NO to our selves and to pleasure and block our full life experience. Tantra can teach how to ignite our pleasure zones and embrace all of our orgasmic potential.

5) Tantric Massage and Sex helps a person to become more self-aware and present. Many people experience scattered thinking/mental focus or clarity. This is because many of us have never been taught how to stop worrying about the future or living in the past. tantra teaches us how we can fully anchor ourselves into the present moment where life is lived and healing occur’s.

6) Tantric Massage and Sex help people learn boundaries, connect with desires and curb impulses or addictions. It also helps a person learn how to ask for what they want and become good with the answer they are given. Many people who suffered from an inability to orgasm, had premature ejaculation issues or were addicted to sex or porn even mind altering substances discovered that through tantric work they could overcome these issue by learning presence, breathing and true pleasure techniques.

7) Tantric Massage and Sex is good for your bank account! Yes, sex/sexual touch/ sexual healing and money are deeply intertwined. It is becoming more and more common knowledge that the shame and programs we hold about our sex we also hold similar ones about our ability to make or keep money. Tantric practices teach how we can live an abundant life in ALL ways.

Perhaps now, the childish smirk, the blushing and increased heart beat you may have experienced at the start of this article have been washed away with an inquisitive openness and desire to try a tantric approach to your life.

At very worst case scenario, a Tantric Massage will leave you feeling relaxed, rejuvenated and as a few of my VIP clients have stated, “It is like going on a two week holiday and skipping to the second week when I finally was able to release all my work and responsibility stress and just BREATHE in the pleasure.”

ENJOY and Namaste’
–KW

Blowing in the Wind

“If your woman’s not begging, then there’s a problem.”

kwpearls“He embraced me with his strong arms and hands, pulling me in close to him as to make known his intentions of what was to come. His hand sat firmly on my lower back and as he leaned in and kissed me passionately, our breaths merged and became one. I could feel the raw hunger of my inner sexual priestess longing to be released from her chains of the day where she had been held prisoner. Forced into submission and told to look, act and be perceived a certain way so as to not cause any ruffle to society. This was not healthy for me to hold tight these feeling of wanting to be released, orgasmic in every breath and fully vulnerable and powerful in life, with my lover and as a woman. The more I allowed the clamping of my hunger to not be expressed the more lethargic toward life I was becoming, the more caught in worry, fear and over analyzing I did. But in this moment I was being taken away from the insanity and chaos of the repression, I was instead led into what my true nature was and my hunger for him grew even more. The kisses became deeper. So deep, that I felt as though he was going to consume me with each twirl of our tongues. As our tongues danced and teased my heart and pussy began to direct my energy into wanting him inside of me. I began to feel the sensations of possibly having him deep within me. As I surrendered into the possibility of this happening he leaned back from me and encouraged that we walk. I had completely forgotten that our original intentions were to just connect and talk, to enjoy an afternoon out at a park. In my being I wanted to be ravished and to ravish. Alas, this was not the time nor place for it, instead I turned my attention outward and took in the smell of the air, the flowers, watched the branches of the willow trees sway in the breeze and make ripples in the pond. I attentively listened as he shared about his life with me and allowed all the feelings of wanting to dash into the trees or lay naked and free in the grass by the water to just pass through my mind.  Down the path and around the bend we came upon some benches, standing out in the middle of nothingness, with tall buildings not far from view and roads nearby. Here we sat. Here we snuggled and shared. Here I could not resist a second more of the ever increasing bulge in his pants. My hands had to touch. My pussy became wetter as he let out soft moans, my pleasure grew and all I could think was, “ god how I adored his cock, his hands, his kiss, his voice, his pleasure.” Our time short, our location extremely public and my soul loving exhibition I made an executive decision and fully revealed his cock to the sunlight, took a deep breath, smiled and took him into my mouth. His scent, his taste, the feel of his throbbing member in my mouth all making my heart rush and sexual hunger pulse through my body. My thrusts becoming deeper, the head of his penis rubbing firmly on the back of my throat, his hands now in my hair pulling it lightly as his breathing became more shallow and his hips tensed. Mid thrust I heard him say, “…and at a public park,” a soft chuckle of pleasure crossed his lips and with his confirmation my tongue swirled in a loop, dipped down and crossed over his testicles as I sucked him in yet deeper, deep enough to cause a mild gag, to encourage more saliva to form so that I could devour him more. Hungrily I encouraged him to allow his milk to flow into my throat as I felt his tension, his heat, his longing to erupt. There in this public park, buildings all around, sun beaming down on us in ecstasy and the cool winds blowing across the water we merged and I drank his nectar. I drank until he could give no more, flushed and now dizzy from the intense orgasmic energy surging through him all he could do was breathe. Breathe in this moment. Breathe in this experience. Breathe in the peace, the intimacy, the excitement and allow the gift of his presence and acceptance to be what it was, a sensual connection not only to me but to life itself.”

Blow jobs, fellatio, hummers, giving head, smoking a Johnson, deep throating, or any other name you may want to apply to this intimate, sensual, raw beauty of sex is only trying to share the blood pumping, breath taking experience that it is and can be for both parties. I have heard from many men about how so many women do not care to give head, and many women say that they only do it to get him off quickly or to keep him happy. Men often do not have the understanding that when a woman willingly and openly wants to take you into her mouth that she is actually saying in her own sexual communication to you that she accepts you, adores you, hungers for you. Her wish is to bring you bliss and restore your faith in the universe and your place in it. A woman who knows the power of a good blowjob understands the great rewards that can be juiced from this experience for both her lover and herself. However, there is a lot that goes into accumulating all that is needed to REALLY make a woman want to go down on you. Just like women’s genitals a man’s Johnson can sometimes not be that yummie morsel of sexual food that we are willing to consume.

A man who does not care for himself is a man who will derail his possibilities of having a woman beg for his milk and possibly even prevent her from wanting him inside her anywhere. I am not speaking of sweat, or even of trimming things up neatly. I am talking about what you think, consume and do every day. These components are the building agents to making your member tantalizing and pleasing in all ways. If you have any sort of a yeast infection in your body (athletes foot, jock itch, dandruff, etc.), or are on a ton of medications, eat poorly or drink too much coffee or alcohol, live in a state of stress or negativity, masturbate to frequently, or do not have a healthy active lifestyle with plenty of rest or meditation you will significantly change the flavor, consistency, smell and even feel of your “load.” Most women have an issue with semen tasting too salty, or bitter, sometimes it will smell more like ass or throw- up instead of having a sweet odor and nutty flavor. A man who respects his body will have the women in his life happily kneeling before his shaft and even initiating or begging for him to cum in their mouth. The self respect and focus on one’s body, mind and soul that will get you ‘more head’ will also increase your chances of getting it on in more ways.

Weather women know it or not, when they themselves are properly cared for and hormonally harmonized, not blocked with a mask of medications, illness, yeast and stress, their natural animalistic instincts will lead them to crave a strong seed. Strong seeds only come from properly nourished men, men who are not poisoning their systems with any toxic overload that our current life offers as a normal state of being. The man in my story is a beautiful yummie example of a modern day gladiator whom I adore being slain by and nourished with his seed. A seed with such strength is a blessing to a woman in many ways outside of being fertilization to her eggs. A man with healthy semen can provide his lover with a fountain of youth, vitality, anti-depressant agents, hormone balancers and an elixir of overall well being. The components of semen are among some of the most healthy and when blended with saliva and if possible some of the women’s juices as well can be a tonic of the god’s. Today’s world has turned ancient practices into disgusting, belittling acts that instead of bringing connection, beauty and health bring shame, separation and pain. In our misunderstanding and lack of sexual education we destroy this beautiful raw sexual act of love and deep connection to ourselves, our lovers and life and we replace it with a need to just release some stress and feel powerful over taking someone else’s gift of surrender.

Ladies and gentlemen, fellatio can be one of the most intense, heated and scrumptious acts of love making. It can bring with it a host of either disease and shame, an ill taste and a longing to disconnect from your lover or it can bring health, intimacy, power, surrender and beauty. This is all in how a man chooses to handle it. So the next time you want your lover to polish your knob, review what you have been doing that will give her the incentive to actually want to consume you not just get you off so she can go on to more important matters, like the dishes or some facebook game.

Want to learn more  tips, tricks, health and intimacy in the bedroom and out explore my customized Sex & Relationship Coaching for single’s and couple’s. Get your questions and concerns answered and learn powerful skills and secrets to having that orgasmic blissed out relationship that you desire.