Can’t help it.
Just the way I am wired.
This identification does not mean that I won’t be monogamous.
It does not mean I will cheat or get bored.
It does not mean that I believe I need more
or are unhappy in anyway.
It simply means that I love relationship.
And stand firm with my integrity.
It means that those I choose to be in relationship with hold an eternal and special space in my heart.
That if my soul leads me to engage in any fashion,
To explore another being however called too,
That I embrace this pull and understand that it is perfect and meant to be, without question.
Many believe that to be polyamorous means that you desire sex with multiples.
That you are dating and being physically intimate with many.
But what polyamorous truly means is to have love and to embrace love and relationship with more than one.
Anyone who has more that one child,
Has more than one friend,
Loves both parents,
And all thier siblings,
Is engaging in a polyamorous loving.
Many years ago a dear friend of mine looked at me and said,
” You are living a polyamorous lifestyle in everyway but your sex. Perhaps you should explore it.”
His words rang so very true to my core.
And he was accurate in his view.
So I ventured onto the sexual path of polyamory and all it could intale.
Now this is not a personal share of the romance, sexing and relations of multiple lovers.
Its also not a share on how amazing polyamory is or how fucked up it can be.
But it is a share on acceptance.
On embracing who you are at your core regardless of what the norms of society say they should be.
Its a post on knowing yourself enough to allow your own happiness to flow.
And to even ASK for it.
Its a share based on living authentically.
And not just using these words because they feel good or make you sound like an awakened soul.
But to actually LIVE by them.
Yes what I share here is about living in conscious surrender to your HAPPINESS.
And to communicate your needs.
To communicate where you are at in any relationship.
Its a share about what loving self and having self respect really means.
Its a share about your truth.
Its about you not wanting to accept that you are polyamorous just like me.
The only difference is your lack in comfort to speak what you want.
What you need.
What you desire.
And your unwillingness to see WHO YOU ARE.
Living blind to all the love that you give.
To all the people that you care about.
That you are in relationship with.
Or that you wish to someday be.
Yes I am poly- monogamous ALWAYS.
I am polyamorous in my life in all ways.
Those seen and those only felt.
I make a decision in moments of my relationship experience to be monogamous or not.
But the S-E-X,
the sex never has anything to do with it.
Outside of a desire to connect, be seen, or enjoy self or another at a more raw level.
Its never about the orgasm.
Its always about the love.
And the greatest happiness and deepest connection comes from integrity.
Integrity with self.
And with others.
The ultimate self love and respect as well comes from this place of not hiding.
Not story telling.
But breathing in ones own TRUTH.
And when we can do this.
We can also elevate our relationships.
Stop Existing & Start Living
Coaching for Grown A*s Believers
Message me for my unannounced Holiday 1:1 Special Now.
STOP YOUR DAMN STINKING THINKING LUV.
You know what I mean
You are sitting around wanting.
Craving all those things.
Desiring a life you don’t currently have,
And thinking the way to achieve it is by focusing on the not having of it.
Thats such stinking thinking luv.
Its polluting up your mind and your feelings about everything that you have.
If you really want the life you currently don’t have then realize that the only fucking way to get what you want is to apply your focus to that, that you WANT.
And the FEELING of it.
But NO EFFING way will you do that, huh.
No thats not logical.
You have this problem.
This challenge before you.
You must FIX what is broken
You must PROVE you are worthy.
It can’t be that easy to just start feeling good.
In this very moment,
To make up your damn mind to LOVE your MOFO life just as it is and feel BLESSED.
No way can it be so simple to change your life by applying your focus to being how you want right now instead of looking somewhere else,
Someplace outside of who you are and what you have.
No your stinking thinking has you believing that your happiness,
Is something you must search for.
Something you must look outside yourself for.
Something that you must work for or show your worth for.
Your stinking thinking has you focused on giving up your power to this world outside yourself in hopes that by doing so you will achieve this elusive thing called HAPPINESS.
And the sad and funny truth is that happiness is not found in things or other people.
Its found in your heart luv.
Its found by you truly embodying YOU.
But you were never taught that.
You were never shown its safe to be you.
To feel you.
Instead the lies and illusions of looking elsewhere were given to you and now the void within is so vast you feel lost.
You have the relationship,
The house and snazzy car.
You have the education.
The success and even money in the bank.
You have seen this world.
And you still FEEL empty as fuck!
You still feel lost in who you really are and it all just seems pointless at best most days.
You are so beautiful in your misgivings of this thing called life.
You are so simple in you desire for happiness and fullness.
But its your MOFO stinking thinking thats making it all so complicated.
So disheartening and making you miss the richness you already possess.
You are RICH.
YOU are ABUNDANT.
And happiness is within you.
Will you CHOOSE to see and feel it or will you continue to give your power and joy away to the illusions and grandeur of this world that tells you to focus on the problems,
Whats your decision luv?
And as always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
” Coaching for Grown A*s Believers ”
I want you to close your eye’s and imagine yourself not wanting for anything.
Imagine yourself not stressing or worrying about anything that you may currently be focused on in your life.
Can you do that?
Many people have a tough time with this simple exercise.
Many people when I ask them to calm their fears and their thoughts around what they do not have look at me as though I have three heads and state,
” I can’t do that, it must be nice though for those who can.”
Is this what you are feeling at my request as well beautiful?
Or are you among the not so average and ordinary who understand and practice the calming of your hyperactive mind and fears?
If you are like the first option then this message is certainly for you. If you are the latter well this message is still for you and it will serve you well to get some extra reinforcement and confidence in your power.
Earlier today my thirteen year old son Levi came to me sharing his desire to learn meditation as he believes after much research and reading that it is the key to him being able to manifest the things that he wants quicker then what he has been doing and that it will also open him up to divine insight. He told me that it scares him to death to think about doing it because he does not know what he is capable of or what messages from soul will come through to him but he is committed to taking on this practice and exploring it.
How beautiful is that authentic truth share he offered to me today as well as the courage and commitment that he is showing to manifest his desires?
And he is thirteen!
I share this because I want you to know that his simplistic understanding and belief is all any of us ever need.
He is more then accurate in what he is believing around meditation and if he chooses as he states to apply himself with focus to the practice then he will reap rewards that he is not even aware of.
People ask me all the time what I do in a coaching session with someone? What they could expect for results in working with me.
The truth is the results depend on the person not on me.
My role in the scenario is to guide and to share what I KNOW works with application and commitment. How coachable someone is has nothing to with me.
One of the main things that I work with people on is the above. Helping them to realize how powerful their thoughts are and how those thoughts translate to feelings and actions.
You see, often what we do out of comfort in habit and false belief is the VERY THING that HOLDS US BACK from our success in having the life that we want.
If you feel unsettled around getting out of your comfort zone.
If you feel nervous about committing to something that is calling to you at a SOUL or CORE level.
If you get excited but then quickly move yourself into doubt about your abilities, worth, etc to make it happen.
If you find yourself with a million and one great reasons (a.k.a. excuses) as to why you cannot do it at this time.
Then beautiful it is time for you to GET REAL with yourself!
You are scared of your own success.
You are fearing your power.
You are fearing how amazing you really are.
You are terrified at what you can create.
And somewhere inside of you,
YOU KNOW that you can have it all.
But the fear of loosing it,
the fear of stepping up to the plate and owning that life that you want is trapping you.
And you are settling for comfort.
Settling for excuses and reasons.
And you because you are ALLOWING this way of living and being you will continue to have what you have.
It all starts with you finding your happy place.
It all starts with you being able to laugh at yourself and show yourself some compassion.
It all starts with you being able to make friends with yourself.
To find the stillness within and let it wrap its peace and flow around you.
STRUGGLE will prevail.
So what do you say beautiful?
Are you ready to claim your life?
I sure AF hope so.
But its starts with YOU GETTING OUT OF THE COMFORT ZONE and tapping into your mystery.
Let Go and Let Flow Baby!
And As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
” Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
This Is What Men Have Taught Me About Money, Abundance, Goals and Happiness.
Years ago, I was married.
I was married at age 18.
I had five children.
Struggled, lost homes, was burred under debt, my health suffered, my marriage suffered, my sex was nothing but duty. I hated my life! I was focused on the NOT having and I was buying into the concept of this is just how it was. This was normal and I had to just suck it up.
My husband then was in financial services, he worked for Primerica which was part of Travelers Group, originally Art Williams created the company back in the 1970’s and it was known as A.L. Williams Life Insurance Group. It was about term insurance and investments.
I met my husband in the company as I was working on my licenses to become a representative to sell for them and was interested in the structure of the system.
Well, fast forward past all that and the wedding and the child birth stuff and you found us BROKE. Chasing our dreams of becoming financially free. Our goal back then was to become Vice Presidents of the company and make a six figure income. Get the ring to show how great we were and the rewards of trips and such.
And so we listened to ALL the motivational stuff.
We went to the seminars.
We made the cold calls and followed the sales scripts.
We worked, worked , worked.
And occasionally made some sales.
Some would charge back, which put us in debt with the company and had to be taken out of future commissions.
some would stick.
For years we chased the DREAM.
For years we struggled.
We comforted ourselves with the concept that we were building a beautiful tale of overcoming the feats and obstacles but in the end succeeded.
We imagined walking on the stage and telling the story.
And we struggled.
Living on what averaged out to be $17,000 a year.
Raising children, scrimping buy.
Food Stamps, Evictions, State insurance, borrowing whatever we could from family to make ends meet and even sleeping on families couches when things got REALLY bad.
But we kept chasing that dream.
Until one day, I could not chase it anymore.
I was burned out. I hated my life.
I wanted it all to end.
And I spent the next two years of my life in the middle of deep dark depression, that still today I wonder how I made it through alive. I acted out, I drank too much alcohol. We fought like wild raging animals.
It was toxic.
It was unhealthy for everyone.
And it had to come to an end.
I decided I was done.
I decided that I wanted a divorce.
I decided that we had too much water under our bridge.
And I chose to burn the bridge.
I decided that if it was up to me, it was going to be my freedom, my way, my flow, my self-discovery, my healing.
And so it was.
I had to let go of all the old ways though.
And I did, for the most part.
I dug in and started to do the inner work.
I decided that I was the most important person in the room.
In my life.
That if I wanted to be an AMAZING mom, I needed to feed my SOUL.
I reinvented myself.
So I started my practice,
it was nothing like it is today,
but it was my foundation grounds.
My learning grounds.
My healing grounds.
And with my practice came a desire to date and explore the masculine because I had never done that before.
I only had explored three men intimately up to this point and I knew I had a bunch of shame, guilt, self-image and fear wrapped around this area of life.
I was not overly caught up on dating.
It was just a desire that I had and if it came along,
then it came along.
I created some doorways for opportunities to happen and I did not really apply my focus there too much. I just knew what I wanted and let it be.
Something about dating and men felt easy to me.
Even with my fear.
I had a fascination, a curiosity that overcame the fear.
Men and dating felt playful to me.
It was a game,
new ground to explore.
My ONLY expectation was to enjoy it and learn.
And so I decided in that moment that I would NEVER chase men. There was no need. Because I wanted it to just be FUN.
And so it was.
As with men, I quickly discovered that money, abundance, goals and happiness were no different.
If I chased them.
They ran from me.
If I turned them into a fun game,
an adventure and let my curiosity run free,
then they flowed.
My advice to you today BABY is simple.
Stop chasing everything!
Wonder why it is running from you?
Well it’s not rocket science BABY.
It is running from you because you are chasing it.
I know that you have been told to chase your dreams.
I know that you have been told to make your goals happen.
I know that you have heard that there is no gain without the pain.
Yeah I understand.
I lived that way for so many years.
I still have those nasty lies pop up in my mind today and try and take me down.
Try and steal my joy.
But today I see them for the wolves they are.
And I know what to do to get back into my FLOW.
That is the power of doing the inner work.
That is the purpose of having a mentor.
That is why we who crave the f-ck yes lifestyle that is so much more than money,
its all about FREEDOM and HAPPINESS.
It’s about SOUL.
Yes we know the power of saying YES to ourselves and taking the ACTION to do the things that must be done.
Those things are internal 80% of the time.
Those things are the things that we AVOID.
We hide from.
But as long as you keep choosing to chase your dreams the old fashioned way, you will remain the predator to that, that you so desire and it will keep running from you.
Sure you can succeed this way.
You can keep chasing.
You can capture your dreams and goals and MAKE THEM HAPPEN.
But at what cost?
How much of YOU will be left?
And will you be truly happy, fulfilled and healthy?
There is an easier way BABY.
It’s called Ease and Flow.
It’s called SOUL Guidance.
But first you must learn to listen.
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
It’s my specialty beautiful!
It’s my purpose work.
My calling and my passion.
When I chose all those years ago to step into who I was and step into my ease and flow,
I chose to live a life of service and help YOU find your ease and flow.
But to do that you have to want it.
You have to be ready to get ready to RECEIVE it.
And that mean creating doorways for it to come through and releasing you from the predatory chains of your current beliefs and habits.
You can keep doing what you are doing.
Or you can grab a consult with me and make a different choice.
You can reinvent YOURSELF.
Which is actually just unveiling YOURSELF.
Claim Your Life Today.