Stop Lieing To Yourself- You Are Poly-monogomish FOREVER!

Poly-monogomish FOREVER!
Can’t help it.
Just the way I am wired.
This identification does not mean that I won’t be monogamous.
It does not mean I will cheat or get bored.
It does not mean that I believe I need more
or are unhappy in anyway.
It simply means that I love relationship.
Value intimacy.
And stand firm with my integrity.

It means that those I choose to be in relationship with hold an eternal and special space in my heart.
That if my soul leads me to engage in any fashion,
To explore another being however called too,
That I embrace this pull and understand that it is perfect and meant to be, without question.

Many believe that to be polyamorous means that you desire sex with multiples.
That you are dating and being physically intimate with many.
But what polyamorous truly means is to have love and to embrace love and relationship with more than one.
Anyone who has more that one child,
Has more than one friend,
Loves both parents,
And all thier siblings,
Is engaging in a polyamorous loving.

Many years ago a dear friend of mine looked at me and said,
” You are living a polyamorous lifestyle in everyway but your sex. Perhaps you should explore it.”

His words rang so very true to my core.
And he was accurate in his view.
So I ventured onto the sexual path of polyamory and all it could intale.

Now this is not a personal share of the romance, sexing and relations of multiple lovers.
Its also not a share on how amazing polyamory is or how fucked up it can be.

But it is a share on acceptance.
On embracing who you are at your core regardless of what the norms of society say they should be.
Its a post on knowing yourself enough to allow your own happiness to flow.
And to even ASK for it.

Its a share based on living authentically.
In integrity.
And not just using these words because they feel good or make you sound like an awakened soul.
No.
But to actually LIVE by them.

Yes what I share here is about living in conscious surrender to your HAPPINESS.

And to communicate your needs.
To communicate where you are at in any relationship.
Its a share about what loving self and having self respect really means.
Its a share about your truth.
Its about you not wanting to accept that you are polyamorous just like me.
The only difference is your lack in comfort to speak what you want.
What you need.
What you desire.
And your unwillingness to see WHO YOU ARE.
Living blind to all the love that you give.
To all the people that you care about.
That you are in relationship with.
Or that you wish to someday be.

Yes I am poly- monogamous ALWAYS.
I am polyamorous in my life in all ways.
Those seen and those only felt.
I make a decision in moments of my relationship experience to be monogamous or not.
But the S-E-X,
the sex never has anything to do with it.
Outside of a desire to connect, be seen, or enjoy self or another at a more raw level.
Its never about the orgasm.
Its always about the love.
The connection.
The happiness.

And the greatest happiness and deepest connection comes from integrity.

Integrity with self.
With God.
And with others.

The ultimate self love and respect as well comes from this place of not hiding.
Not story telling.
But breathing in ones own TRUTH.

And when we can do this.
We can also elevate our relationships.
Our love.
Our sex.
Our understanding.

As Always
Stop Existing & Start Living
Coaching for Grown A*s Believers

Message me for my unannounced Holiday 1:1 Special Now.

It’s Your Stinking Thinking Luv!

STOP YOUR DAMN STINKING THINKING LUV.

You know what I mean

You are sitting around wanting.
Craving all those things.
Desiring a life you don’t currently have,
And thinking the way to achieve it is by focusing on the not having of it.

Thats such stinking thinking luv.
Its polluting up your mind and your feelings about everything that you have.

If you really want the life you currently don’t have then realize that the only fucking way to get what you want is to apply your focus to that, that you WANT.
And the FEELING of it.

But NO EFFING way will you do that, huh.
No thats not logical.
You have this problem.
This challenge before you.
You must FIX what is broken
You must PROVE you are worthy.

It can’t be that easy to just start feeling good.
Right now.
Right here.
In this very moment,
To make up your damn mind to LOVE your MOFO life just as it is and feel BLESSED.

No way can it be so simple to change your life by applying your focus to being how you want right now instead of looking somewhere else,
Someplace outside of who you are and what you have.
No your stinking thinking has you believing that your happiness,
Is something you must search for.
Something you must look outside yourself for.
Something that you must work for or show your worth for.

Your stinking thinking has you focused on giving up your power to this world outside yourself in hopes that by doing so you will achieve this elusive thing called HAPPINESS.

And the sad and funny truth is that happiness is not found in things or other people.
Its found in your heart luv.
Its found by you truly embodying YOU.
But you were never taught that.
You were never shown its safe to be you.
To feel you.
To show,
Express you.

Instead the lies and illusions of looking elsewhere were given to you and now the void within is so vast you feel lost.
Listless.
Empty.
You have the relationship,
The house and snazzy car.
You have the education.
The kids.
The dog.
The success and even money in the bank.
You have seen this world.
And you still FEEL empty as fuck!
You still feel lost in who you really are and it all just seems pointless at best most days.

Oh luv,
You are so beautiful in your misgivings of this thing called life.
You are so simple in you desire for happiness and fullness.
But its your MOFO stinking thinking thats making it all so complicated.
So disheartening and making you miss the richness you already possess.

Yes luv.
You are RICH.
YOU are ABUNDANT.
And happiness is within you.

Will you CHOOSE to see and feel it or will you continue to give your power and joy away to the illusions and grandeur of this world that tells you to focus on the problems,
The pain.
The lack.

Whats your decision luv?

And as always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
” Coaching for Grown A*s Believers ”

TO BE SOFT… What Does It Mean To Your Happiness?

TO BE SOFT IS TO BE POWERFUL. – Rupi Kaur
 
Last year I went out with my second oldest child, my daughter Rebekah to get tattoo’s. She had this beautiful quote that she was getting putting on the inside of her arm that her boyfriend had ended a love letter with. It was such lovely, powerful words of encouragement and I could easily understand why she desired to keep them for her lifetime.
 
I love ink. And getting inked is a THING.
If you are into ink, you get it.
If not, oh well, I am sorry.
 
SO I decided that I would get a tattoo as well, but I always want my tattoo’s to have meaning of some sort and I had not given much thought to this moment. There we were driving to the artist discussing what I should do. When Bek says mom,
“To be soft is to be powerful. – This is so you mom.”
 
I was bewildered, I do admit.
I felt like I sucked at being soft.
I felt like soft was scary.
I felt like soft was bad somehow, that I should be ashamed of it even.
I questioned what she meant by this.
And she explained,
“Mom you are always there for us. You always let us see you and you are always working on yourself. You make mistakes and you allow for our mistakes. You are the strongest person.”
 
What she was expressing to me was that I ALLOWED MYSELF TO FEEL LIFE.
 
The good.
The bad.
The painful.
The joy and orgasm.
The sweetness.
The bitterness.
The meh.
The void.
The fear.
The fullness.
 
I feel it all.
And I KNOW the BEAUTY of it, because I allow myself to experience it all.
 
And so, she was correct in her statement and much like her that day, I needed to keep with me the reminder of my power in my FEELS.
 
Through the course of this lifetime,
I have wanted so badly to run and hide from what I was feeling.
I have wanted to mask it,
cover it up and not allow it to be seen by self or others.
And when I did allow it to be seen or felt,
I was shamed of my humanness around my fears, my joy, my pain and void.
Something always seemed amiss in my feeling,
it was this voice in my head,
telling me that I should not be feeling this way.
It was this same voice telling me I was weak, pathetic and hopeless.
That it was this sort of crap that kept me disconnected from people.
That I was too much to handle.
I was broken.
 
 
And so I worked ever so hard to toughen up.
I focused on breathing in my emotions and “building a strong house” to hold them in.
In the belief that by not revealing them,
by holding them,
that I was being emotionally mature.
 
LMAO!!!!!
 
Looking back at this I feel silly.
Sweet in my desire to be mature with my emotions,
strong for the people in my life,
true.
But so wrong in truth,
this way of being,
of living was not LIVING.
It was hiding from life.
It was avoidance of who I was,
it was a shrinking of my heart center,
a closing to the one’s that I love.
It was a hardening or callousing of my ability to connect,
to be seen and to see another.
In this stifling of feeling,
I lost my ability to have intimacy with life, with others and with self.
I SHRUNK as a human.
 
And in this I lost.
I was the BIGGEST looser.
Because all I wanted was the intimacy,
the love,
the connection.
To be received and to hold space for another.
And what I gifted myself with in my “strength of holding my emotions so tight” was to shield LIFE.
 
The end result outside of loss of intimacy and ability to relate, connect and love, let alone be authentically compassionate or forgive self or others,
also led me to a shut down in my allowance to self to open and receive abundance.
 
My lesson in feeling,
was that in order to have my desires manifest in any fashion,
I needed to allow myself to “SOFTEN INTO THE FLOW OF FEELING LIFE.”
 
That my power came from this space,
You see in order for you to be able to KNOW YOUR PATH,
to FEEL what is right and good for YOU,
in order for you to be able to TRUST your judgement on any decision,
You must FEEL Your emotions, your physical reactions, your truth about it.
 
This means that if you are calloused to FEELING LIFE,
you will consistently make wrong choices for YOUR LIFE.
 
And this is not what living is about.
This is just existing.
 
And that is the WHY that you have been questioning.
WHY AM I NOT HAPPY?
Why does nothing make me happy?
 
Simple….
You are not FEELING LIFE.
 
Want to change this?
Message me for deet’s on 1:1 Coaching Today and level up your life experience to one of FEELING.
 
As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
https://www.tantrictransformation.com/micro-consult/

Just Another Day in Paradise… Or Is It? Not for all OBVIOUSLY. ( Is This YOU?)

Just another day in paradise.
Just another day living,
breathing.
Nothing happening here.
Or is there?
 
I think there is luv.
I think there is so much happening here.
 
And what is happening here is something that I know you long for.
I know that if you knew how to achieve it,
how to have more of it,
how to keep it,
YOU WOULD.
 
or would you luv?
 
Because maybe you would not.
Maybe you would say,
“yeah, yeah… that’s nice for her, but…..”
 
Maybe you just don’t think you can have it.
Maybe you believe that it is something you only capture small moments of in this life.
Maybe you think it requires ton’s of money.
Or sex.
or something else outside of yourself.
 
I don’t know.
But I wonder if I told you the God’s honest truth about it,
and I shared the secrets to obtain it,
would you go after it?
 
Or would you shrug your shoulders,
frown and carry on as is?
 
Here I am in paradise.
Here I am with an amazing man.
This resort we are staying is so beautiful,
the people are sweet and personable,
I have nothing to complain about except that I would like to say a few days longer than planned originally.
But that is always the case when you are enjoying a new destination and escaping all that troubles you, right?
 
Laughing and playing is easier here.
Lounging and letting go is simpler.
Smiling and being care free comes more naturally.
Connecting and just being present just is.
And is beautiful.
 
Or at least it should be.
But so many people I watch from a far,
and they frown,
they walk slumped and humped over,
they look bored,
stressed,
anxiety ridden still.
or even just dead.
They are not laughing and enjoying.
They are not connecting and letting go.
They do not look happy.
 
How can this be?
 
It just is because these folks who refuse to let the joy in here,
here in paradise,
have no idea how to open up to joy in any way.
They are so accustom to pain and suffering that even when attempting to enjoy life they still manage to not.
 
And then there is the crowd who is drinking themselves into laughter and letting go.
The one’s who are still running from their pain even here.
Who cannot let go of the stress,
they live in their minds,
in their fear,
and they drink to mask their worry.
They bake themselves mentally and physically,
they eat all the food they can,
to make sure they get their full dollars worth.
In scarcity they live and remain.
Even here in paradise.
 
This luv is not healthy.
This is not THRIVING.
This is far from living at all.
And it does not encompass joy.
 
I share with you this because today,
today my lover asked me while sitting on the beach watching the waves roll in,
he asked me if there was anything that I wanted to change in my life?
 
He said, ” I know you have goals on your income and stress level, your time and what you want to create, but outside of that do you want to change anything?”
 
My answer:
 
NO!
 
I love my life just as it is.
I love my life even if my goals are not met with my business, finances, time or physical body.
I am HAPPY just as I am and if I remain in these very shoes the next decade I am happy.
 
I want for so much and I am building with great intent and focus just for those dreams and desires.
Each day I feel my life moving the direction that I want.
Steady and strong.
I do not fear tomorrow.
I appreciate yesterday.
I adore today.
 
And no matter what,
TODAY I AM HAPPY.
 
Today my heart is full of joy.
Today my heart is in gratitude.
The new people that walk into my life,
the experiences,
the love,
the connection.
The opportunity.
Each and every day is a new day.
It is a new opportunity to have it all.
and all of it is not somewhere out there,
out there where I don’t have it…
 
No.
It is not out there at all.
It is RIGHT HERE.
In my mind,
in my heart,
it is soul lead.
And it is felt.
 
My eye’s radiate with this joy.
My face beams with it as well.
My calmness,
my flow.
It is all because,
I have committed to it.
But luv,
the answer to having it is not some riddle or maze through all of time and space,
it is not found buy the purchase of something great,
or by the search even of the very thing that it is.
 
No luv,
to have this JOY.
To have this HAPPINESS.
 
All you ever need to is commit.
It is here.
Here within you right now.
You must learn to feel it.
You must learn to love yourself.
To trust in this life,
in God and your SOUL.
 
Here you will discover all that you wish.
But you must commit.
 
COMMIT TO YOU.
To JOY.
 
Will you commit?
Let’s Go.
 
And As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
 
Ask me about 1:1 coaching to achieve you happiness and goals today.
Joy is waiting for YOU.
Message me for deet’s on getting the support you need to achieve it.

The Importance of Your Happy Place & Your #1 Friendship

I want you to close your eye’s and imagine yourself not wanting for anything.

Imagine yourself not stressing or worrying about anything that you may currently be focused on in your life.

Can you do that?

Many people have a tough time with this simple exercise.
Many people when I ask them to calm their fears and their thoughts around what they do not have look at me as though I have three heads and state,

” I can’t do that, it must be nice though for those who can.”

Is this what you are feeling at my request as well beautiful?
Or are you among the not so average and ordinary who understand and practice the calming of your hyperactive mind and fears?

If you are like the first option then this message is certainly for you. If you are the latter well this message is still for you and it will serve you well to get some extra reinforcement and confidence in your power.

Earlier today my thirteen year old son Levi came to me sharing his desire to learn meditation as he believes after much research and reading that it is the key to him being able to manifest the things that he wants quicker then what he has been doing and that it will also open him up to divine insight. He told me that it scares him to death to think about doing it because he does not know what he is capable of or what messages from soul will come through to him but he is committed to taking on this practice and exploring it.

How beautiful is that authentic truth share he offered to me today as well as the courage and commitment that he is showing to manifest his desires?

And he is thirteen!
I share this because I want you to know that his simplistic understanding and belief is all any of us ever need.
He is more then accurate in what he is believing around meditation and if he chooses as he states to apply himself with focus to the practice then he will reap rewards that he is not even aware of.

People ask me all the time what I do in a coaching session with someone? What they could expect for results in working with me.

The truth is the results depend on the person not on me.
My role in the scenario is to guide and to share what I KNOW works with application and commitment. How coachable someone is has nothing to with me.

One of the main things that I work with people on is the above. Helping them to realize how powerful their thoughts are and how those thoughts translate to feelings and actions.

You see, often what we do out of comfort in habit and false belief is the VERY THING that HOLDS US BACK from our success in having the life that we want.

If you feel unsettled around getting out of your comfort zone.
If you feel nervous about committing to something that is calling to you at a SOUL or CORE level.
If you get excited but then quickly move yourself into doubt about your abilities, worth, etc to make it happen.
If you find yourself with a million and one great reasons (a.k.a. excuses) as to why you cannot do it at this time.

Then beautiful it is time for you to GET REAL with yourself!
You are scared of your own success.

You are fearing your power.
You are fearing how amazing you really are.
You are terrified at what you can create.

And somewhere inside of you,
YOU KNOW that you can have it all.

But the fear of loosing it,
the fear of stepping up to the plate and owning that life that you want is trapping you.
And you are settling for comfort.
Settling for excuses and reasons.

And you because you are ALLOWING this way of living and being you will continue to have what you have.

It all starts with you finding your happy place.
It all starts with you being able to laugh at yourself and show yourself some compassion.
It all starts with you being able to make friends with yourself.
To find the stillness within and let it wrap its peace and flow around you.

Without this…
STRUGGLE will prevail.

So what do you say beautiful?
Are you ready to claim your life?
Your happiness.
Your joy.
Your pleasure.
Your DREAMS!

I sure AF hope so.

But its starts with YOU GETTING OUT OF THE COMFORT ZONE and tapping into your mystery.

Let Go and Let Flow Baby!

And As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
” Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

This Is What Men Have Taught Me About Money, Abundance, Goals and Happiness.

This Is What Men Have Taught Me About Money, Abundance, Goals and Happiness.

Years ago, I was married.
I was married at age 18.
I had five children.
Struggled, lost homes, was burred under debt, my health suffered, my marriage suffered, my sex was nothing but duty. I hated my life! I was focused on the NOT having and I was buying into the concept of this is just how it was. This was normal and I had to just suck it up.

My husband then was in financial services, he worked for Primerica which was part of Travelers Group, originally Art Williams created the company back in the 1970’s and it was known as A.L. Williams Life Insurance Group. It was about term insurance and investments.

I met my husband in the company as I was working on my licenses to become a representative to sell for them and was interested in the structure of the system.

Well, fast forward past all that and the wedding and the child birth stuff and you found us BROKE. Chasing our dreams of becoming financially free. Our goal back then was to become Vice Presidents of the company and make a six figure income. Get the ring to show how great we were and the rewards of trips and such.

And so we listened to ALL the motivational stuff.
We went to the seminars.
We made the cold calls and followed the sales scripts.
We worked, worked , worked.
And occasionally made some sales.
Some would charge back, which put us in debt with the company and had to be taken out of future commissions.
some would stick.

For years we chased the DREAM.
For years we struggled.
We comforted ourselves with the concept that we were building a beautiful tale of overcoming the feats and obstacles but in the end succeeded.
We imagined walking on the stage and telling the story.
OUR STORY.

And we struggled.
Living on what averaged out to be $17,000 a year.
Raising children, scrimping buy.
Food Stamps, Evictions, State insurance, borrowing whatever we could from family to make ends meet and even sleeping on families couches when things got REALLY bad.

But we kept chasing that dream.

Until one day, I could not chase it anymore.
I was burned out. I hated my life.
I wanted it all to end.
And I spent the next two years of my life in the middle of deep dark depression, that still today I wonder how I made it through alive. I acted out, I drank too much alcohol. We fought like wild raging animals.

It was toxic.
It was unhealthy for everyone.
And it had to come to an end.

Fast forward.
I decided I was done.
I decided that I wanted a divorce.
I decided that we had too much water under our bridge.
And I chose to burn the bridge.

I decided that if it was up to me, it was going to be my freedom, my way, my flow, my self-discovery, my healing.

And so it was.

I had to let go of all the old ways though.
And I did, for the most part.
I dug in and started to do the inner work.
I decided that I was the most important person in the room.
In my life.
That if I wanted to be an AMAZING mom, I needed to feed my SOUL.

I reinvented myself.

So I started my practice,
it was nothing like it is today,
but it was my foundation grounds.
My learning grounds.
My healing grounds.
And with my practice came a desire to date and explore the masculine because I had never done that before.
I only had explored three men intimately up to this point and I knew I had a bunch of shame, guilt, self-image and fear wrapped around this area of life.

I was not overly caught up on dating.
It was just a desire that I had and if it came along,
then it came along.
I created some doorways for opportunities to happen and I did not really apply my focus there too much. I just knew what I wanted and let it be.
Something about dating and men felt easy to me.
Even with my fear.
I had a fascination, a curiosity that overcame the fear.
Men and dating felt playful to me.
It was a game,
new ground to explore.
An adventure.
My ONLY expectation was to enjoy it and learn.

And so I decided in that moment that I would NEVER chase men. There was no need. Because I wanted it to just be FUN.

And so it was.

As with men, I quickly discovered that money, abundance, goals and happiness were no different.

If I chased them.
They ran from me.

If I turned them into a fun game,
an adventure and let my curiosity run free,
then they flowed.

My advice to you today BABY is simple.

Stop chasing everything!

Wonder why it is running from you?
Well it’s not rocket science BABY.
It is running from you because you are chasing it.

I know that you have been told to chase your dreams.
I know that you have been told to make your goals happen.
I know that you have heard that there is no gain without the pain.

Yeah I understand.
I lived that way for so many years.
I still have those nasty lies pop up in my mind today and try and take me down.
Try and steal my joy.

But today I see them for the wolves they are.
And I know what to do to get back into my FLOW.

That is the power of doing the inner work.
That is the purpose of having a mentor.
That is why we who crave the f-ck yes lifestyle that is so much more than money,
its all about FREEDOM and HAPPINESS.

It’s about SOUL.

Yes we know the power of saying YES to ourselves and taking the ACTION to do the things that must be done.

Those things are internal 80% of the time.
Those things are the things that we AVOID.
We hide from.

But as long as you keep choosing to chase your dreams the old fashioned way, you will remain the predator to that, that you so desire and it will keep running from you.

Sure you can succeed this way.
You can keep chasing.
You can capture your dreams and goals and MAKE THEM HAPPEN.

But at what cost?

How much of YOU will be left?
And will you be truly happy, fulfilled and healthy?

There is an easier way BABY.
It’s called Ease and Flow.
It’s called SOUL Guidance.
But first you must learn to listen.

As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

It’s my specialty beautiful!
It’s my purpose work.
My calling and my passion.
When I chose all those years ago to step into who I was and step into my ease and flow,
I chose to live a life of service and help YOU find your ease and flow.

But to do that you have to want it.
You have to be ready to get ready to RECEIVE it.
And that mean creating doorways for it to come through and releasing you from the predatory chains of your current beliefs and habits.

You can keep doing what you are doing.
Or you can grab a consult with me and make a different choice.
You can reinvent YOURSELF.
Which is actually just unveiling YOURSELF.

Claim Your Life Today.

Free Consults ( phone, facebook video or 1:1 in person) till May 22, 2019 

 

If You Were Ready Then It Would Be Happening! Here is What To Do.

I know what you want.
I totally get it beautiful.
You want to just skip to the finish line.
You want to avoid the struggle,
avoid the work.
Move quickly past all that stuff that you keep getting told you need to do but that you have been doing,
you did it all last year,
the year before even.
And this year it is simply just too much to do more of that.
So much like a kid fresh out of high school,
the temptation of taking a year off from schooling,
with the claims of coming back,
you too are wanting to just take some time off.
 
Yet, life seem’s to be nagging at you.
Life is disrupted,
you are getting more and more out of alignment.
And with the turbulence that you face day after day,
you feel more drained.
There is no energy to do the things that you think about doing.
There is no time to get started on that project,
to step into the things that you were doing or the things that you know that you need to be doing or that you feel called to do.
It’s all just so difficult.
You feel meh about it.
 
Don’t you?
 
But then as you sit back and you look at everything,
you wonder how,
how can I go from here to there?
How can I do it without having to apply myself any more than what I have already done?
How can I get what I want,
have what I desire,
but not have to go through the grounds of learning anymore.
 
I mean I am good right where I am at.
I can do that.
I can do this.
I may not understand what I am to do with any of it,
I might be feeling lost,
and uncertain.
But do I really need to ask for help?
Do I really need guidance of any sort?
Do I really need to “learn” or “study” for anything else?
 
And so you sit.
You sit and you wish.
You ponder.
You question.
But take action????
 
LOL…
That was a thing for last year.
 
This year, action is taking a break.
And with it so is your momentum.
You are certainly filling up your desire boat with things you want.
You are learning about what you do not want.
But action is out to sea and is not in your scope of concern yet.
 
And so you shall sit and watch your life move by in slow motion.
You will see your goals rise up and sink back down,
because the momentum that was there to manifest them is slowing. The focus and love and care that you were giving them in positive attention is not there.
It cannot be there.
Your focus is on the not having of them.
Your focus is on what is not happening.
Your focus is on your lostness.
Your dismay.
Your fatigue.
Your fear.
You mehness.
 
Try and truly feel into that desire for whatever it is that you crave. Can you feel the desire? Can you really?
Or is it just a thought that has you believing that you are desiring, but there is no emotion attached to it?
Or the emotion is of the not having it.
The sadness of what has not shown up in your life.
It’s time to get truthful with yourself.
It’s time to realize that the reality that you are living is nothing more than what you have created from your feeling of not wanting to step in fully.
Of wanting to just take the year off.
To avoid it.
 
Life is just fine as it is right now, right?
 
If that was so, then you would not have that underlying feeling.
You know the feeling that I speak of.
The feeling that is slowly eating away at you from deep within.
That feeling.
Yes that feeling right there.
the one that you try and cover up,
you try and hide with food, movies, entertainment, family activities, alcohol, drugs, illness, busy work.
Yes that feeling.
 
You cannot hide your feeling from God.
God knows you at a DNA vibrational level.
There is no hiding your truth.
That fear,
that depression,
those negative idea’s and thoughts that just keep popping up and destroying your day,
yes they are all over you beautiful.
You are bathed in them and they are repulsive.
They are keeping you away from your desired life experience.
 
But if you want to change it,
then you are the ONLY ONE who can change it.
You must choose to take ACTION.
Stop sitting there in that low vibe energy beautiful,
stop focusing on the addictive energy of crashing and burning, of loosing and leaving, of not having.
Stop focusing in on all that you do not see manifesting.
And TAKE effing action toward what you want.
 
You say you want to have a thriving business?
Then get a mentor. Get your message out there DAILY.
Be seen and heard or shut up and let go of this dream.
 
You say you want a better body?
Then stop eating fast food and soda, drink more water, eat more healthy foods and get your a*s working out DAILY.
 
You say that you want better sex?
Then start having more sex. Speak your needs, your boundaries and ASK for what you want DAILY.
 
You say that you want to find your soulmate?
Then look within and do some deep work on yourself. Get a coach or a mentor and gain some clarity, let go of the past, do the work to manifest the soulmate DAILY.
 
You say you want more money?
Then stop thinking about the money that you do not have.
Don’t start your day with looking at your bank and confirming that you don’t have it. Instead do the mindset work, the manifestation work to call in the money that you want. Get a coach or a mentor and ask for help DAILY.
 
It’s a choice.
It’s a commitment.
It’s you calling it in.
We live in an attraction based world beautiful.
You attract to you what you think and feel about most.
You want what you want,
but you seem to be under the misconception that you can just ignore it, just not do anything to change your thinking,
your feeling or attention and that it will happen.
Yes life is magical,
yes you can manifest that shiz overnight.
But you have to FOCUS on what you want from a place of having, loving and not in fear.
 
It’s about time that you stop wanting to avoid the stretch.
It time you stop avoiding the field of learning and growing that makes you READY to have what you want.
 
Think of it like this,
It’s sorta like you want to be a yoga teacher but you never want to take a yoga class. You just want to get paid and have the body without the training.
 
That is goofy right?
 
Yet that is what you are doing when you try and skip any piece of your process.
When you try and avoid the perceived pain,
the perceived stretching that will be required of you to gain your dreams and desires.
 
In your current condition,
YOU ARE NOT READY TO RECEIVE.
 
But you can be!
Make the choice.
Make the decision.
Make the commitment.
And TAKE THE EFFING ACTION.
 

Stop F-cking around with this year and your life!

 
And remember,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
 
 
It’s not too late to reach out and get the coaching and mentoring that you need to have that F-ck Yes! lifestyle and live in total yumminess. You have been wanting to step up and have the money, love, health, wellbeing and abundance that you have been dreaming about.
 
So stop dreaming and take action.
Let’s make 2019 YOUR Year of Miracles.
 
Grab my application for FREE consultation for coaching and mentoring NOW before the offer expires on May 22nd, 2019. A $199 value FREE – Must book your consult on or before deadline date. I work with people all over the world!!!!
 
https://www.tantrictransformation.com/services-request-form/

Your Goofy is Your Superpower to Success!

I feel goofy!
I feel silly!
I feel like a BIG effing kid.
And that is what makes me,
ME.

Often my grammer sucks.
My spelling even worse.
I put exclamation points where they don’t go.

I LOVE comma’s! 😻
I am learning this whole emoji thing,
I hear it is a language in itself.
One I aim to learn,
but find myself a bit confused with. 🤨

I make up words on the spot,
can flip into weird accents without notice.
My mood switches more than the winds of Santa Anna.
I am up,
I am down.
I am complex,
and extremely surfacy.

I truly don’t give a F-ck what you think of me,
if I please you or not,
but goodness how I dislike confrontation and want nothing more than you to be happy with me.

I am pretty F-cked UP!
I got a whole universe of baggage.
My ego loves to dance on my SOUL.
I self- sabotage at any opportunity I give myself,
and I get caught in worry and overwhelm when it happens.

But that is what makes me,
ME.

I am a city girl.
I am a country girl.
A hick and a slut.
I am a saint and a teacher.
A mother and a cunt.

I am most certainly not everyone’s peach.
Many dislike my ways and looks.
But for each and every one of them,
there is a SOUL MATE that supports,
this crazy dance.

I see through the bullsh*t.
Your’s and mine a like.
I will be sarcastic, obnoxious,
bold and raw,
but bring peace to your heart,
as you will not feel judgement,
but love instead.

Did I mention I am goofy?
Well indeed I am.
It may be my BIGGEST or BOLDEST characteristic once you get to know me,
it stands right behind this EGO I have.
Which tries it’s damnedest to not let my light be seen,
my play be felt, and this BIG kid in me that is always wanting to enjoy.
Be SEEN.

I want to get it perfect.
This I most certainly do.
But I understand that perfection does not exist the way we think of it,
but instead its about FEELING.

We are all projects,
in this thing called life.
You and I alike.
It’s our purpose ,
our mission to support one another.
The best way to achieve this,
is not through criticism and or being right.
It’s through tapping into your GOOFY,
letting the KID come out and PLAY.

But you gotta love yourself enough,
be courageous and weird,
stand out from all the sheeple’s who flock in fear.
It’s not there that you will find me,
no I am over here.
In the land of goofy, strange and imperfect.
The land of acceptance.
It may be a bit confrontational to stand out in the crowd.
It may feel like a lifetime adrenaline rush,
not a walk in the clouds.
But I can tell you my fellow Goof.
Its what we are to do.
To tap the F-ck INTO,
and BE WHO WE ARE.

Not hide from our purpose.
Not run from the feelings.
Not bury our heads in the sand,
but look out and say,
“Here I AM!”

It’s your God given right,
you are worthy in deed you are,
to have all the abundance,
the house and the car,
your bank account over flowing,
your life abundant and rich.
Yes it is your God given right,
to be a BIG RICH KID.

Let that goofy out I tell you,
let it be felt and be seen.
It’s your ticket to greatness,
to not be so serious,
to not worry,
to not fear.
God has your back,
its always been that way.

Acceptance, love and silliness.
Your own version will get you on your way,
no one else really matters,
if you are not STRONG.

Realize the injustice you are doing,
to this world and the ones you love,
the dishonor you are showing,
when you shrink and hide who you are.

So be that BIG kid.
Be that GOOF that you are.
Let your LIGHT SHINE bright.
And Be Who Are.

And remember,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

www.kendalwilliams.com

It’s As Easy As Walking In Faith And Saying YES To SOUL.

You are doing it because you think you should.
You are doing it because you feel you have too.
You just keep doing the damn thing that you know at your core is nothing but pain and suffering,
causing you anxiety, holding you in stress and fear because you don’t know what else to do other than to keep doing it in hopes that something,
yes that something will change.
 
But things just don’t change.
Year after year,
there you are beautiful.
Just doing the thing.
As if life will get better,
all while you are hating on it.
All while you are stressing about it.
Fearful of what will be.
 
But you keep doing do it, don’t you?
And why?
 
Because that is what a responsible person does.
That is what society says that you must do.
That is why you went to college,
got that degree,
got this job.
 
Its so you can do the damn thing.
It has nothing to do with what you want.
It has nothing to do with what you enjoy,
what you feel called to do at your SOUL level.
But it has everything to do with what you “think”
you need to do,
based on what your mommy and daddy told you all those years ago.
What your teachers, pastors and media all said was true.
And now,
now you are living it.
Trying to enjoy that dream life that has nothing to do with your dreams at all.
But everything to do with what makes you hate on your days, your years and your life.
Living for the weekends, the holidays.
Yes you keep doing the damn thing because everyone is doing the damn thing.
And you look around and see that it is just this way.
So it must be so.
 
But something inside of you is calling you to question all of this.
Something inside of you is just not feeling like this is how God wanted you to live.
 
You feel different.
You feel unique.
But you feel silly for thinking that you could be something more than what you are.
And yet you do.
 
You hear that call from deep down with in.
It is calling you to do something more with your life,
it is yelling at you to be true to your SOUL.
It sounds crazy scary,
but you also are bit turned on to the idea that you could have your dreams.
That you can desire more.
That you are unique.
And that God wants more for you too.
 
It makes sense doesn’t it.
Sense that you were born to stand out.
Sense that you were born to step fully the f-ck into who you are.
Sense that God wants you,
yes YOU to listen to your soul.
And beautiful,
when you look in that mirror each morning,
what feels better to your heart and soul?
 
To look into those big eye’s of yours and see all that you have been hiding from, all that you have been denying for your life and self?
 
Or…
To see that light,
that power,
that creative spirit.
And see it all flying free.
Being true.
Being powerful.
Making it’s mark on this world of ours.
 
What does it feel like to say yes to yourself?
What does it feel like to step forward in certainty and faith that God has your back?
 
Just pause and sit with that for a moment love,
feel the power that runs through your being when you feel into living that sort of faith.
Feel the love that pours through your veins when you just let your heart be seen and felt.
It feel’s good.
Damn good, to be YOU.
 
Unlike doing that damn thing,
that damn thing that is stealing your life from you.
That has you hiding over there,
uncertain as to what move to make,
fearful of who you are.
Not knowing if you are good enough.
Second guessing your choices,
your life,
your everything.
 
Realize this though.
YOU can have it all.
You can live authentically in all areas of your life.
You don’t have to keep doing the damn things that are holding you in this suffering.
You, yes you can live that exceptional life.
That life that God see’s is for you,
that life that you are being called to.
Let yourself feel into living that life,
if not but just for this second in time.
Let yourself feel it.
Truly feel it.
And embrace it.
Now KNOW this love,
YOU have the power in this moment to make this your reality.
 
All you have to do, all you ever had to do was want it.
Want it bad enough to actually CLAIM IT.
Claiming this life that has always been yours,
might sound scary at first,
but I promise you this,
it will become addictive to live this way.
To say yes to yourself.
To live according to your authentic self.
Your SOUL.
You will find yourself living in blessings and wonder if you take this challenge.
But you have to want it.
You cannot do it just because it sounds cool.
Or because john, or Jim, Beth or Mary want you to want it.
No, the only way that you can CLAIM IT is to want it for yourself.
and allow yourself to have it.
Allow yourself to step forward,
and SAY YES.
 
You will stand out from the masses.
The crowds will look at you in judgment.
You will be questioned.
And many will try to knock you off of your alignment.
But if you stay true,
true to yourself,
then you will live that life of your dreams.
You will have all that your heart and soul have wanted for.
You will know what your purpose is,
and it will be birthed from your breath each day.
 
There will be no doubt,
that you are unique.
There will be no question that you were born for greatness.
Your life will be proof.
Your happiness contagious.
But, first you must DECIDE.
 
Which path do you take?
Do you remain on this path with the damn thing that you have been doing for all this time, that consistently gives you what you don’t want but keeps you safe?
 
or…
 
Do you dare and step on the path of SOUL and follow the calling from deep within, walk in FAITH and FINALLY say F-ck YES! To YOU?
 
The choice is yours,
it has always been so.
 
May you make the choice that makes you happy at your deepest cellular level.
 
Your are WORTH IT!
 
As always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
 
Let’s get you on the path to your greatness.
Let me show you how to call in all the abundance, love, and passionate purpose that your SOUL desires today with 1:1 elite coaching today.
 

Bored with Yourself? Here is How To Tell.

Oh girl you look out into your life and you just feel no sizzle.
You just feel little excitement.
You think to yourself,
why?
As you look around and you see all this good shit happening but it just seems sorta boring.
You know what I mean.
The more comfortable you seem to get the more average and ordinary tends to seep into your daily life and practices.
And the more average your life is,
the more it looses its luster.
But that’s what you have wanted for so long…

NOT the average.
NOT the ordinary.
F-ck NO!!!!!
Never!

But you want the comfort.
The stability.

And now you have it.
So now what?

There is not a whole lot happening is there?
There is just your daily tasks.
That thousand long list of things to get done.
The bills to pay,
and they are on auto pilot so no real interaction there.
They just seem to happen.
Your kids come and go from school.
There is the grocery shopping.
The sports events.
Choir.
The gym.
Woohoo!!!

Oh yeah, there is this guy or that guy.
You know the one’s that hold your attention for a second.
Or even longer.
They are great…
Sometimes.
They are sweet and all wrapped up in you.
But seriously…

You are bored!
You are F-CKING BORED with BEING YOU.

And it is showing up in how you react to experiences.
It is revealing itself in how you choose to show up each day of your life.
It is making itself know in your lack of orgasmic sex,
your lack of depth and surface level blah blah in intimacy…

HaHa… Intimacy.

What is that these days?
It is nothing.
Because you are bored with the level of life that you have been allowing yourself to play at.

You are lusterless.
You are not shining.
You are dull.
And YOU my beautiful are the ONLY mother f-cker that can do anything about it.

It’s high f-cking time that you STOP accepting so little from yourself.
You know you have so much more inside of you.
You know that your voice was meant to be heard.
That your words were meant to touch millions.
You know that you get things at a different level than most.
And this is your effing SUPER POWER.

Yet you keep choosing to play is safe.
To focus on stability.
To be comfortable.
And that is leaving you with this bland taste in your mouth.
It is leaving you wanting for more.
And what once seemed like so much to desire,
now is nothing.
And you are almost ready to shake the boat and if you have to,
tip the mother f-cking thing over so that you can clean yourself off from all of the shit that you have been feeding yourself and crap that you have been living.

Because you were born for so much more.
And many say that they are,
but few actually believe it to a level to do something with it.
To actually make a mother f-cking decision to and CLAIM IT.

And this has somehow become you.
But it hurts.
It is agonizing at a deep soul level.
As it should be.

You know too much.
You understand too much.
You have see the magic that life has to offer.
And you KNOW YOUR POWER.

Turning your back on your power and on your core,
stepping out of your SOULS light is what is causing all this muckiness in your energy.

So just stop it already!

Yes you are bored.
Yes you are bored with yourself.
Yes you are too comfortable.
Even in the bad shit, you are comfortable.
Yes ALLOWING who you really are to be seen is scary.
Yes you want it and you doubt.
But YOU KNOW.

And if you know then all you need do is SAY F-CK YES!!!!! To YOU.

So what is holding you back beautiful?
This comfort of average and ordinary.
This entrapment of what you have.
The fear of loosing what you have so far,
OR….
of becoming EVERYTHING you WANT?

I double dog dare ( yes I just said that… because our 4th grade selves had it right about something, DARE…)
you to SHINE.
To fully step into who you are and stop accepting this piss poor version of you.
Because sure it may feel safer to linger here and be real nice and comfortable,
but I promise you this,
it won’t last.
Because what you are not aware of is that reality that in your comfort you are also fearful of loosing it all.
And this fear will out weigh everything else and make itself a reality.

At the end of the day,
you might as well just step the f-ck up and claim what you want,
take the risk to loose it by asking for it all,
then sitting around and spinning on your average and ordinary f-cking thumbs and loosing it anyway,
because honey,
that is what can happen.
And does OFTEN.
We get stable.
We start to play it safe.
Too safe.
And we get comfortable.
We settle.
And we start to take it all for granted.
Then we fear loosing it.
And BAM as if someone cast some magic spell on us or cursed us,
it is all gone.

But you my love have a choice.
You can grab this magic moment and you can step all the f-ck in on your life.
Without hesitation.
You can get CLEAR.
NOW.

You can set the tone of your day.
Of your mood.
Your week.
And your whole life.
But playing small,
playing safe,
is for those who are pansies.
Who enjoy the average and ordinary,
not YOU!

Your soul wants to take that dare.
It wants to show itself off.
Stand out.
Be BRIGHT.
STUNNING like the diamond that it is.
And it wants it all NOW.

Your SOUL does not need faith.
It resides in the greatness of the eternal.
It KNOWS its power.
Its purpose.

Will you follow your SOULS LEAD?
Claim Your Life Today.

And as always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

Don’t wait another one, two, five, ten years to start THRIVING.
Make 2019 the year of you claiming YOU.
Explore VIP elite coaching today.