MY DADDY EARL JUST LOVES IT WHEN I PRAY, YA’LL.
I get down on my knees before him and he praises God at the sight of it. Every time he pops his lips I know exactly what he wants from me. I lick my lips and start to hum him the song of an angel.
I love how he gets so passionate at my hummin’.
Sometimes he will even grab a hold of my pigtails and shake full of the holy ghost moving through him. He tells me that when the holy ghost moves through him that it is his favorite thing and only my hummin’ can make it happen.
I love making him shake in spirit like that.
Makes me feel so good inside.
I went there.
If you missed my livestream on this then maybe you need to go explore it.
Or maybe not…
Not if you are a prude that is.
Please don’t, I do not want to hear it from you in that case or have you rolling your eyes at my crazy.
You know it was not that long ago that I would have freaked the
f-ck out about playing games like this with my lover.
I would have been too caught up in my own bullsh*t to have fun.
I would have believed that my partner would not like me if I pretended to play like this.
I mean sex is serious.
Relationships are serious.
LOL… not good sex and relationship.
Sure there is some seriousness in there, of course,
but if you are not laughing, finding yourself feeling youthful, full of desire and thirst for fun then I can tell you that your relationship and sex are getting ready to flatline if they have not already.
I have worked with so many hundreds of couples through the last decade as a relationship coach and the one thing that I am always sharing with them is how important PLAY is in the relationship.
Playfulness inside and outside of the bedroom or wherever you are doing the nasty at…
More than just dinner and a movie.
Get creative, learn something new together.
Get a little edgy, make your heart flutter like it was your first kiss all over again.
Do things that you typically would not think to be a date even.
Some of my favorite dates and sexual experiences did not cost a fortune. They did not take place in traditional ways.
But instead they revealed to me my lovers desire, joy, inner child and explorer. They created a space for each of us to explore ourselves and each other in ways that we had not yet.
One time I was told to meet my lover at a gas station. I did so and he filled up my car, then told me to drive next door and give my keys to the man at the detail shop. I did so. He followed me and picked me up there. I got into his car, he blind folded me, kissed me passionately and asked if I was ready for a little fun adventure.
I said yes.
He said okay we got 90 minutes.
Next thing I knew he handed me a glass of my favorite chardonnay in a togo wine glass. I took a few sips and he took it from me replacing it with some glass yoni eggs and told me to insert them and do some squeezes.
I did so.
Then he handed me a little bullet vibrator and told me to insert that.
And so I did.
There I sat, eggs vibrating in my vagina, wine back in hand, blindfolded in his car as he drove around a parking lot a bit to make sure I had no clue what direction we were headed next.
From there he took me to lunch.
He parked the car,
came around my side and got me out, blindfold still on.
Walked me into a busy restaurant and told me to walk up to the nice man at the register and tell her I wanted the special.
ANd so I took a deep breath and did so.
As I did this I could hear all the people passing me by, talking about what was going on, wondering what we were doing, snickering. I could feel their eyes even though I could not see them. I had to face myself.
I had to face my own ego at this moment.
My lover took my hand and arm and walked me to a table where he sat me down, got me some more wine, helped me sip it and then he proceeded to feed me lunch while I sat there helpless and blindfolded.
Once done he walked me back to the car,
got me buckled in and took me off to….
Dessert of course. 🙂
He parked again,
walked me into a cold and strange smelling place.
Told me to ask the nice man at the register for the special, and so I did.
The man handed me a waffle cone with my favorite ice cream in it.
My lover took me back to the car, got me buckled and drove around in circles some more.
The sun would hit me in the eye’s every now and then and I found myself wanting for the next moment of surprise.
Sure enough he stopped the car.
Got me out but before doing so, took my shoes off.
As I got out I found myself standing on something wet and cool, he asked if I knew where I was, but I did not.
Then I got back in the car.
From there he drove a distance, the road changed from paved to dirt. And he parked.
He came around and got me out of the car, still barefoot.
He walked me through some grass, up and over a wood bridge of some sort and into a closed in space that felt like it was out in the middle of a field. Here is bound my wrists, kissed me some more and began to touch me passionately.
Before I knew it he was laying me down on a blow up mattress that was out here in this building we were in.
He removed my clothes, kissed my body with hunger.
My excitement grew.
I was trying to figure out where we were,
I could feel a breeze by my feet and my head at the same time, yet I was in some enclosed structure. As I scooted up the bed some and he proceeded to go down on me, my bound arms lifted above my head to only find themselves in some bushes and grass right there.
Where was I?
He devoured me.
He made passionate primal love to me.
It was heated and intense.
Once done, he grabbed me, stood me up, dressed me, walked me back to his car, unbound me wrists but kept the blindfold on.
Got me in the car, handed me my wine and then we drove off.
Before I knew it he was parking.
He leaned in, kissed me, told me he loved me and hoped that I enjoyed our adventure as he took off my blindfold.
There I was parked behind my now detailed and fully cleaned and gassed up car.
90 minutes after the time I had dropped it off.
He wished me a great afternoon and got me my car keys.
To this day I do not know all the details of this adventure.
But what I do know is how much I loved it.
How I will cherish that moment in time forever.
How I accessed a deeper level of myself, of my sex and of that relationship in that moment.
It was vulnerable.
It was intimate.
It was connective.
It required trust on both sides.
It was playful and it brought us both great joy.
And what did it take?
Well we will never know because he ain’t tellin’
but what it ultimately took was CREATIVITY and DESIRE TO PLAY.
And that is the point to this whole tale and to my livestream earlier.
In relationship we grow tired and bored of our sex and of each other because we forget how to court.
We forget how to play, to laugh and be joyous in our sex and relationship and therefore it all gets tiring and old.
Like a chewed up piece of gum that lost its flavor years ago.
But it does not have to be like that.
You can have a dynamic connective deep relationship if you will simply allow yourself to get real and raw,
to be seen and to enjoy.
Stop taking your sex so damn seriously.
Instead start enjoying your flesh, your partner’s flesh.
Your laugh and their laugh.
Get a little edgy with each other.
Discuss things you would like to explore and try.
Start to believe that you can be creative,
that you do have the time,
and that it does not have to take an arm and a leg to create spectacular events for the one you love.
It’s time to level up your love.
It’s time to stop accepting boring as your normal in your sex and relationship.
It’s time to get down and dirty and play in the sandbox together.
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
Ready to claim that F-ck Yes! Relationship with your partner?
Ready to stop settling for boring as your norm?
I sure AF hope so! Cuz’ you are worthy of so much more and so is your relationship and sex.
Reach out to me today to learn the secrets of a playful turned on relationship.
WATCH THE LIVESTREAM HERE NOW!
I HATE YOU…. YOU EVIL PIECE OF SH*T!
I will show you my pain.
I will make you feel how badly you have hurt me.
I can’t believe you ever loved me.
I can’t trust you ever again.
You need to pay for what you have done.
I am broken because of you.
You owe me closure, explanations.
I want to hear it from your lips.
How dare you do this to us.
And so many other things that we say in the midst of break up and tossing our pain out there in the world at the ones that we proclaim to have loved and lost.
Often in break up we fall prey to the belief that we need to be a victim in the break up.
We want to appear the victim.
Or at least we think that we are the victim,
that we are not an active game player in the relationship destruction.
After all WE DID EVERYTHING POSSIBLE to make it work.
It is the other person’s doing that things are crashing down.
It is the other person’s fault that we are hurting, lost, angry.
We blame the other person for the chaos, the violence, the hatred.
And something inside of us wants the other to feel piss poor about the break up and show their pain to us, fight us, antagonize us, maybe even beg for the relationship and want us.
Yes we want often in relationship break up to do the most painful thing we can think,
and that is to get our partner to want us back,
to get them to see their wrongs and then we want to CRUSH THEM.
And if they do not stand in the fight with us then we do everything in our power to instigate their pain and anger.
We antagonize, and we fully step out of alignment with who we really are.
In all of these ego based reactions to break up,
we forget the most important thing in the relationship.
We forget the two people who love each other.
We forget our hearts.
We forget our cores.
And we hand over ALL our personal power and self- respect by acting immaturely and acting out in rage and hatred.
We believe that we need to show how badly we are hurting,
how much our hearts desire to be united with this other person or how much we want and need them by leaning fully into our pain bodies and stepping away from WHO WE TRULY ARE.
And so we become a Taylor Swift song and we slash tires, throw bricks, carve our names in furniture and cars, flatten tires, destroy our lovers property, try to deface them through slander and attempt to destroy their worlds, their relationships by letting the world know our pain.
We act out and we attack.
Whether we are the one’s doing the breaking up or the one’s getting broken up with, often at least one party if not both believe that break up can only happen if they turn the other into a persecutor and themselves into a victim.
But folks THIS IS NOT LOVE.
And if you truly ever loved someone,
if you wanted and could see a life with that person,
if you had a life blossoming with them,
if you found yourself in your heart,
expanding, growing, exploring love and relationship,
and you want to do so much good for that person and for yourself then WHY do you want to dishonor the relationship, yourself, them and most importantly LOVE in this fashion of becoming a victim?
Emotional maturity in relationship is a powerful tool,
no matter the events occuring in the relationship.
If we have a strong standing in who we are as individuals and if we truly have self- love and respect then we may feel the anger, the pain but having emotional maturity and respect for self and for the love will guide us. We will also be able to see our role in the relationship break up.
Because there are no such things as victims in a relationship break up. Even in the worst break ups, where physical violence has occured ( and I have had this happen in my lifetime) we each play a role. We are active participants in the events that are happening to us.
Emotional maturity, spiritual maturity, maturity in general is about taking responsibility for self.
If you think you did not have that coming….
Think again love.
You are a co-manifestor to your reality.
You are an active creator to your life.
Your lack of knowing yourself and upholding who you are,
not doing your own internal work and getting right with YOU,
loving you unconditionally, accepting you unconditionally, lying to yourself and using your partner and others, life as a mask to your own internal issues,
PLAYED A MF BIG A*S ROLE IN THIS MOMENT.
In your pain.
The reality is this love…..
Break ups MUST happen in relationships that are OUT OF ALIGNMENT with the people who are in the relationship.
Relationships have expiration dates.
Even the lifetime one’s come to a physical end.
The sooner we humans get right with the fact that all relationships end, the better our relationships can be. The more fulfilling, loving and the more harmonious our breakups can be.
Imagine ending a relationship in love instead of hatred and pain?
Imagine two people loving themselves so much so that their love for each other and the relationship allowed them to end it in love as well.
And did not mean that they needed to destroy the other to prove their love.
Because destroying the other IS NOT LOVE.
It is ego.
And it is not love to self or honor of self either.
It is fear.
It is not soul based.
It is ego based and immature.
But instead imagine realizing that the relationship has served its time and purpose, finding gratitude for all this it taught you, openned you up too, brought into your life and helped you gain clarity around.
Imagine being in love with the time and lessons that were shared.
And knowing that its expiration was upon your doorstep, but that it did not mean that you had to be in pain or anger.
Instead that you could love this other person and yourself so much that you could let go and move forward in confidence that all things happen for a reason.
This is love.
And ending relationship in love uplifts both parties.
Ending relationships in love supports the lives and future relationships of both parties.
Ending relationship in love expands who we are,
heals us, opens us and is one of the greatest gifts that we can offer OURSELVES.
Imagine this relationship break up and ask yourself today,
How mature am I my relationships?
Do I take responsibility for myself in them?
Do I truly act from love or do I let my ego get in the way and become a victim?
And As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
Ready to elevate your love and life in 2021?
Ready to call in that soul aligned relationship that you cannot see past?
Let’s get you aligned to your core love.
Reach out to me for information on my 1:1 and group coaching programs starting in January 2021 and the early bird discounts for those coming later this month.
Average cost of a divorce: $15,000 to $30,000
Average child support payment for one child: $430
Average alimony support percentage of highest earning spouse: 30% of income for up to 50% of time of marriage
Saving your relationship and working through your shit: PRICELESS
Remember the old commercial?
Well I sure do.
And this topic is near and dear to me in recent times.
But more importantly,
It is a possible reality to many of my couples clients.
Or potential couples clients.
The sad truth is that quiet often people go looking for help.
They sit in my office,
Wrenching their hands together,
Butterflies in their stomach,
Wanting to be heard.
To be understood.
And to be given hope.
They look at their spouse,
And they hope that they too have a sincere desire to heal the wounds of years gone by.
They hope that their partner is feeling at ease and will be open to the possibilities of getting help.
Often, tears are shed in my office by one or both parties as they recognize the pain,
They see the situation of their marriage clearer,
And they feel the tingle of hope spreading its wings inside them.
There they sit.
They share intimacies within this safe container,
Baring their truths of bitterness, of loss of desire, of financial pains, of feeling left behind and under appreciated.
They share their sins.
From adultery to drug usage to porn and anger.
They share their longing.
Their longing to reconnect.
To love and be loved.
And so they walk away from me,
Feeling connection and understanding.
Feeling as if they can recover.
They feel HOPE.
It is inevitable my follow up email with all my recommendations and observations comes into their inbox.
It asks them for their,
Many stand up to the plate.
But many steer away in fear.
They lean on objections.
From price to time.
They say they need to wait.
They say they think they can do it on their own.
They say this
And they say that.
But none of it matters.
They CHOOSE to not commit
And thus they choose to remain in their suffering and in the harsh reality that separation most likely will knock soon at their door.
But they feel like they cannot change the outcome.
Because it just is.
So they settle into victim mode.
And they loose HOPE.
How much does it cost to sacrifice your HOPE?
How much is it worth to step into COMMITMENT ?
It is priceless.
Thats what it is.
On both sides it is PRICELESS.
The only question
I ask these souls who choose to say goodbye is,
Are you happy?
At the end of any decision.
You must ask yourself.
Are you happy?
Here you will learn your truth.
Here you will learn about your fear.
And if you made the right choice.
No one can answer this for any of us.
It is between us and soul.
And it is PRICELESS.
Stop Existing and Start Living
Now accepting 1+1 Couples Coaching Clients.
No matter where you are in this big world you can get the private coaching to recover the intimacy and connection you desire in your marriage.
Explore Passion Coaching for Couples today.