Life, Death and Authentically Being You.

Life, Death and Being Authentically YOU.
 
The last two weeks of my life have been a roller coaster of life changes. Some have a direct impact on my world, some not so much but do because they effect my children or my extended family.
 
Two weeks ago my eldest daughter gave birth to her little boy.
 
Last week, my youngest two son’s grandfather passed away.
 
And today,
Today I sit and desire nothing more than to just continue being authentically me.
 
I look at the changes, the life, the death and I know it is all beautiful. But there is this sense that I get that I am expected to be more emotional about things then what I really am. As though I am not putting on a grand enough show for my world.
 
Silly as that may sound, it does come in to me from outside sources and these little obnoxious voices that sound off in my head here and there that want me to focus on things that really have no significant impact on my life joy or happiness or fear for that matter.
 
Since the birth of my grandson two weeks ago I have been hit with the question, ” How does it feel to be old enough to be a grandma?”
 
And “Wow! Top of the totem pole. Enjoy him while you have the energy.”
 
It is like because I am a grandmother now,
even though there is the blessing of this sweet baby in my life that society believes that life is all down hill when this milestone happens. That you are almost around the corner from the grave.
 
And then,
last week my kids grandfather passes away unexpectedly from heart failure.
 
The thing society worries about.
DEATH.
Croaking.
 
And as a grandparent one must add this fear to the daily worry list I assume….
 
I think NOT!
 
But if we did not fear death enough as it is,
such events as a birth and then a death can bounce it around a tad more than normal.
 
It is my opinion that the reason we fear death so much is because we do not believe in who we really are. We give lip service to this thing called SOUL or SPIRIT and to the desire to believe in something greater than ourselves such as source, divine or God. But when we really get into it,
when we are faced with it, we question our belief and we find ourselves in a negative vibe of “hope.”
 
Now many believe that hope is a positive.
I not so much so.
 
To me hope is a negative word,
with negative energy attachments.
It is disempowering.
 
Just feel these statement-
 
” I hope I get a new job.”
” I hope I overcome this illness.”
” I hope she graduates school.”
“I hope nothing bad has happened.”
 
verses
 
“I know that the perfect job for me is around the corner.”
“I know I just need to support my body and take some time for me.”
“I know she is working hard to achieve her goals.”
“I know that things always work out for everyone’s highest and best good.”
 
Which side of the fence feels better to you?
Which side feels stronger?
More powerful?
More like it is focusing good vibes toward something vs. negative vibes?
 
 
We do this in so many ways.
Bring ourselves down.
Bring others down ( often without realizing the power of our words)
and focusing in on the negative all the while BELIEVING we are giving our best wishes or highest vibrational thoughts and focus.
 
But it ain’t true.
 
If we really believed we had a SOUL.
If we really believed that there was a God or something greater than self and it has a plan,
then we would only desire to live our life to the fullest and that has nothing to do with living in fear of death.
 
Fearing death disables us from being present in our life.
It has us act from a place of scarcity.
A place of disembodiment.
We tap out and try and hide from life.
All in the pursuit to live longer.
To not feel pain.
To not suffer.
To not have bad things happen.
 
But this is sheer craziness.
These suppose bad things are here to help us clarify what we want in life and from life.
 
These “bad” things help us discover who we are, want to be and they are blessings.
 
Not all blessings come in pretty little boxes.
Not all are sweet and sugar topped.
 
Without the contrast we never truly authentically get a chance to meet who we are.
 
Avoiding the contrast is for the weak.
It is for those who believe that they can somehow outsmart death.
They think that death is an ending.
When what if….
Croaking just was another step on our life path for our soul?
 
But hoping for survival in our current state of experience is silly.
What one can do,
is COMMIT to LIVING presently.
To loving this moment.
To expanding into their fullest potential and giving this amazing world their VERY BEST.
 
You will never achieve that,
living in FEAR.
You will never have that presence if you are trying to avoid death.
But you will miss out on all your BLESSINGS.
No matter how you perceive them.
 
And the even worse part is that you will never taste the raptures of your AUTHENTIC SELF.
 
You are beautiful.
You are powerful.
You are amazing.
You have so much to give this world.
 
Don’t let fear and worry of what you cannot avoid,
what you have no control over hide your light any longer love.
 
It is time for you to step up.
Claim Your Life.
And Stop Existing & Start Living
 
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
 
Are you ready to commit to your SOUL?
Desiring something more in your life?
 
If you are someone who looks in the mirror every day and knows that you have so much more to offer this world, but feels stuck in how to go about revealing it, then perhaps we should speak.
 
If you feel a call in your gut and you know you need to just get the tools and find the support to step the eff up in your life once and for all and let your light shine in…
relationship.
work.
purpose.
 

When Too Much isn’t Enough.

I am too much.
Truly I am.
The way I share,
the way I love,
the way I enjoy,
the way I act,
the way I sex,
the way I can let go,
the way I parent,
the way I live.
 
It is all too much and then some.
Yet I am happy being too much.
Even though it costs me relationships,
arguments, hurt feelings and lot’s of change.
I am too much,
and it is just who I am.
 
But my too much,
is still not enough,
because my too much,
won’t give you what you want and may need.
 
How can this be?
Too much is not enough???🤔
 
You see it is the very fact that in being too much,
I push the limits.
I push the limits on everything,
especially on love, on relationship, on sex and my over all way of living.
Too much means that I am demanding in these things.
Too much means that I know what I want,
and I am not afraid to go after it.
Too much means that if I feel like I need more of something or that I cannot achieve it in the way before me that I will go and get it another way,
and tell you about it.
Too much means that I share.
I share in massive amounts,
because I want you to know.
I want you to step into the pool of living with me,
in integrity.
I want to grow,
and experience,
and I want to do it with those who want it too.
The other too muchers out there.
 
Yes, too much means that I understand that life is very polyamorous in so many ways. I know that my heart can expand to the depths, to the horizons that I choose. I know that I can love many and deeply. And I do.
 
I do this daily.
I do it openly,
and it makes me too much.
For many.
 
My too much is not enough,
even though you proclaim it is everything.
My too much is not enough,
even though you claim not to want to change me.
My too much is not enough,
even though you enjoy when it suites your desires.
My too much is not enough,
because it will push you to your limits.
It will make you uncomfortable.
It will test your heart.
It will call to your soul.
It will demand for you to fly or to walk away.
 
I am too much,
and it is a life long heartache,
as I share of my too muchness,
with those who love it and then hate it.
I am too much and with it comes the pain of loss,
as people ebb and flow,
and say they cannot do it.
With feeble excuses,
they move into knew life choices,
they run away from my too much,
to all that is comforting and less challenging.
 
Here is the reality of life for anyone who is truly too much.
We share deeply of ourselves,
we love deeply of those who dance with us in moments of our lives,
and we know that our too much will burn them.
And with the fire they will run.
Run into the arms of another.
Run into the comforts of average.
Run into the excuses of ego,
of jealous,
pride,
fear.
Run.
Run.
Run.
 
Yes that is what will happen,
because my too much is not enough.
And it will push you into the pain of reality.
The pain that you cannot hold me.
You cannot control me.
You cannot conquer me.
You can only dance with me.
And dance I will for hours and days,
for months and years,
and even decades.
But it is ultimately your choice,
how long the dance lasts.
 
Grow and expand.
Breathe in the feelings.
Breathe in the beauty,
the boldness,
the joy,
the play,
the adventure.
But heed the desire to stop it’s flow,
for in that moment is when the dance will end.
 
As always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
 
For more coaching, truth shares and awakened education join me for 1+1 coaching via phone, zoom or in person. Or follow me on Facebook for my morning FREE Conscious Coffee Broadcasts where I share truth bombs and alignment asskickery.
 

Don’t Sacrifice Your Life for Anything.

Change vs. Embrace
This is the statement of today that speaks so loud to me.
 
It carries with it the reality of how f-cking crazy we humans can be.
 
And none of us can escape the crazy.
These sort of thoughts based in fear of loss,
are among the worst.
They prevent us from truly living up to our full potential.
 
We fear change.
We fear embracing who we really are.
It feels like we have to give something up in order to become ourselves.
 
But that is silly.
It is all about expansion,
not about reduction.
 
Change does not mean that we have to sacrifice anything.
It means that we will make different judgments,
different choices then what we would under an old way of being. That is all.
 
Same with embodiment of self.
Once we start to embody ourselves,
we start to embrace all that we could be,
could have, ‘could do.
and we STOP accepting less for our lives.
 
This is only scary because we typically do not feel worthy of claiming this level of greatness into our lives.
 
The lack of worthiness causes us to doubt.
Tells us that we will loose.
tells us that things can not continue to be this great,
that there is a price that must be paid.
 
And so we move into stagnation.
We pause.
And we pause some more.
Until the pause causes us to embrace the pause,
and then we fear movement even more.
 
We look out at our world and we see evidence that standing in our truth will cause relationships to break,
will cause careers to fail or change, will cause discomfort in life. And we fear the pain.
 
What we forget it that all birth,
no matter what the birth is based on,
will come with pain.
The pain of discovery.
The pain of consciousness.
The pain of feeling who we are and how much we have been denying who we are.
Hiding from ourselves.
Hiding from our desires.
 
Change vs. Embrace
 
They are the same and yet not.
When we focus in on change, we lean into the belief that there is something about us that is not good enough and it needs to change.
 
When we focus in on embracing who we are, we often lean into the belief that we are too much and the world cannot handle us, therefore we will loose.
 
Either way, we are scared of loosing.
 
And at the end of the day,
you know what will happen when you keep denying your truth?
 
Do you?
Think about it.
 
If you look into dis-ease you will discover pretty quickly that all dis-ease is just that, a dis-ease in the body which stems from something (emotional/ psychological) that we are masking, hiding from and not wanting to give the time of day to.
 
Why are we hiding from these things?
Because they carry pain.
It may mask itself as anger, frustration, anxiety or depression, but they are all some pain that is stored up.
 
And one of the biggest pains we carry with us,
is the pain of not stepping into who we are meant to be,
who we want to be, or showing up in life the way we know we should.
 
The pain of potentially,
okay let’s be real here,
most likely,
 
Going to die without living out our mission.
Our purpose,
with our music still in us.
 
And the true sad thing is…
that by hiding from our truth,
ignoring out of fear of loss our beauty,
our power,
our music,
we end us killing ourselves.
 
Yet we will proclaim proudly,
that we are willing to sacrifice our lives in order to keep all that we fear loosing NEVER realizing that if we loose our lives that we will as well loose all that we are trying to not loose in the first place by denying our truth.
 
Silly yes.
But so f-cking true.
 
 
Just look at your life.
Look at your best friend.
Your sister.
Your uncle.
or anyone.
 
We are all guilty of this sin.
We all consistently say no to our truth out of fear,
and we all reap the rewards of the physical and emotional pain that it brings with it.
 
The key to stepping into who you are.
To EMBRACING Yourself and living unappologetically as the beautiful, powerful you that God intended,
is SIMPLE as F-ck!
 
Just Do it!
Grow a f-cking pair,
and put one foot in front of the other.
Take action, by leaning into the now.
Into what your heart says.
And say YES.
Say YES to yourself.
 
Because you are worth it.
You can have it.
And God wants you to be powerful,
bright and beautiful,
abundant and over flowing with blessings.
 
Claim your life.
As always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
www.kendalwilliams.com
 
Join me November 18-21st for my 3 day intensive online workshop.
Ass In The Sand – Facebook Live Workshop for Entrepreneurs Who Want It All
If you are an entrepreneur and you want to know how to take your biz from zero to $100k quickly, for real – then this intensive class is for you.
Pre-registration coming out this next week.
Look for it or message me to get on the pre-launch list.

Open and Shut – How do you cope with transformation?

Open and Shut.

The lesson of my year.
When this year got started I looked at it and just knew that it was going to be transformational.
Now I am not an overly superstitious person or one that listens strongly to “hocus pocus” sorts of things, but I do pay attention to energy and take it all in.

Born in the year of the fire dragon according to Chinese astrology, the year of the dog that we are in typically brings in relationship transformation items for me.

You can call this bogus, and I often do myself in my own head.
Questioning things as they do not line up to my logical, scientific, realist thinking and understanding, however there are times that I see that these “mystical, spiritual” sorts of things actually do shine a light on potential energy of the moment.

This all being said, the year of the dog has proven once again to be a year that is reorganizing my life in ways I never anticipated.

The last year of the dog I told my now ex-husband that I wanted a divorce.

This year both my over 6 year intimate relationships came to an end suddenly and friendships are changing right before my eye’s as well. My family is growing in number, orchestrating itself, I feel pulled away from my mother and I am questioning some relationships that are lingering.

The year of the dog is all about relationship.
Loyalty.
Family.
Brotherhood-sisterhood.

And for us dragon’s it reveals the truth in these areas.

Change is always difficult.
The feeling of loosing those who have been closest to you is never easy and is painful at a level that I do not believe I have words to express.

Yet I am reminded in these times of relationship transformation, the wisdom and comfort of Ecclesiastes 3: 1-8

” To every thing there is a season,
and a time to every purpose under the heaven:
A time to be born, a time to die;
a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal;
a time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh;
a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to get, and a time to lose;
a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
A time to rend, and a time to sew;
a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
A time to love, and a time to hate;
A time of war, and a time of peace.”

As I move through this year,
I feel my ego wanting me to shut the doorways on life,
to fully retract from things that I enjoy,
form the relationships that I do have,
or to shut down from the people that I am in a relationship transformation with.

I have observed that as these changes occur that my fellow transformation warriors often choose to shut themselves down and out.

Making what seem’s like a public display of their pain by closing the doors to what not is, but what could be.

The pain of transformation effects everyone differently,
and I am not proclaiming that there is any right or wrong way to go about it.

It is nothing more than a noticing of these times.

My way has always been about opening.
Just because a relationship is evolving,
just because new boundaries are being established,
just because truths have been spoken,
lies broken,
and hearts revealed,
that in my humble opinion does not mean that one must shut down to the relationship and close it fully out UNLESS,

Unless….
That is that the vibration between souls is so great of a difference that they cannot co-habitat in any fashion or sense.

Then a full closing must happen.
At least for a time frame.

In this case, I am reminded of the wisdom ,
“Time heals all wounds.”

I use to say this was rubbish.
But now in my 40’s I know that it is truth.

I have had my heart broken in many ways,
by those I never thought would and I have done my fair share of breaking of other’s.
This process will never end,
but what I have learned is that over the course of time,
Time will heal the woulds.

Time allows for us to move if we desire from a state of closed to a state of open.

It allows us to educate ourselves about the lessons that we practiced in these past relationships and to expand ourselves more, yet always offering a deeper realization of ourselves.

Relationship is all about us meeting ourselves at a more intimate level.

Our relationships with others reveals to us our internal relationship with ourselves and with God.

As we step forward on this path of transformation,
we find our guidance here.

The steps we are to take will be lit by blessings that will guide us and desires that will call to us.

Do we choose to open or shut to them?
The answer to this question makes all the difference on our path of understanding and healing.

We are always being offered a choice.
It is always ours to make.

What manifests in our life experience comes from these choices and the energy of opening or shutting in any given moment.

It is truly only by leaning into love,
and remaining open through the pain of the transofmration,
that we expand to our deeper self.

In loving gratitude for all those relationships through my life that have offered these lessons and I have been able to take part in. May we all move toward a deeper union with our truth.

And as always, 
Stop Existing & Start Living

Join me in October for 5 weeks of transformation,
where YOU Claim Your LIFE in 2018 Once and For All.
Message me for details….

I am F-cking Sick and tired of all your bullshit!

I am F-cking Sick and tired of all your bullshit!
That was how I approached a group of 50+ people last night who have reached out to me about getting help with their sex, their relationships and their wantabe f-ck yes lives.

My lover read the title and said, I don’t know too many people who can get away with making that their subject line of an email and get a positive response back.

The truth is, not too many people can.
The reason is that most people, coaches included are masking their truth.

Are scared of saying something to piss someone off.
Of not appearing “professional“.

Then you have this .01% of us out there that are living our raw, authentic truth and have no shame for just being ourselves and stating the truth.

After sharing my thoughts with 50+ people last night and hopefully providing them with a good asskickery, it came to me that I should share with you as well. Because many of you too, reach out in many forms asking for help. Guidance and coaching but seem to never follow through for yourselves.

So here is an incomplete taste of what my message to these peeps was and now it is going out to you as well. 

Kendal’s Thoughts on Not Claiming Your Life. – The decisions we sometimes make and why.

Yes you reached out to me.

Maybe you have forgotten even that you wanted help around those delicate matters that cause you stress, make your life a little less pleasurable and you secretly wish you had not chickened out or copped some lame ass excuse for not taking by them by horns and dealing with them once and for all.

Maybe you simple believe that by ignoring your issues, they will some how magically just be gone and everything will fix itself.

Maybe you think that you got it all dealt with now, and you don’t need help.
Maybe you feel like:

You don’t have the time
You don’t have the money
You don’t have the energy
You don’t have the support
It does not matter anyway.
You will be FINE.

Okay, you keep telling yourself all that bull bunk, and the rest of us who instead have chosen to push the play button for our lives will go live.

Go have a F-ck YES! Life and enjoy the bliss that we want, not just fantasize about it.

Right about now you are most likely asking yourself:

Who the f-ck is this chick with attitude and why is she dropping in on my doorstep?

Well, if you recall or care to refresh your memory, 
my name is Kendal Williams.
You reached out to me because I have the ability to take you from where you are at, 
to where you want to be.

I am a coach that specializes in an intimate part of life, 
one of the parts of life that we all wish was better, or we had more going on in.

That would be,

SEX and Relationship.

Now granted over 2018, I have taken the last 20+ years of my coaching practice where I have helped countless people with many things from nutrition, parenting, body image, dreams, spiritual life, business, sex, relationship, to orgasm issues and have started converting my strategies, education and skills over to a passion of mine.

That being: 
Prosperity Coaching, focused on Abundance, Success, Money, Business + Sex and Play.

I call it F-ck YES Life Coaching and Freedom Based Life Coaching.

But you contacted me for the sex and relationship, ‘and sex and relationship is a vital piece of life and plays a significant role in all areas of our life including these above. That is why I can never stop coaching on it.

With that said, 
By the first of the year you will see my coaching totally merge over to the above and I will no longer be claiming the title of Sex & Relationship Coach.

That is WHY I am sending this email out to you.
RIGHT NOW – I am collecting my end of the year VIP clients to work with for the remainder of 2018 and into the beginning of 2019. These VIP clients will have the dedicated focus and attention around the above matters. Around what you originally reached out to me to discuss.

And after that?

Well you will have to work withing the new perimeters of my practice.

It’s NEVER to late to start. 
It is never too late to say YES to yourself, 
to your dreams.

The ONLY thing ever stopping any of us, 
Is OURSELVES.

So, yes I am tired of everyone’s bullsh*t of stating what they do not have and focusing in on the shit. I am exhausted from having hundreds of people reach out to me, but not TAKE ACTION.

How the eff do you expect to be happy, 
truly happy and to have the life that you desire IF you refuse to make the changes, get the help and lean in?

How?

Let’s get real. 
And tell ourselves the truth.

You got SCARED.
Doubt popped into your head.
Hopelessness stands at your gate.

And you are SETTLING.
Settling for what you have, 
It’s SAFE
It’s COMFORTABLE
You know what to expect.

But are you HAPPY?

This is the ONLY Question You need address.

If you answer it honestly, 
then you effing NEED TO message me back ASAP.

Before things have fully transformed over here in my green pasture of pleasure.

SO take that step to your desired life.
You are worth it.

Don’t be like so many poor saps out there that thinks you have time, 
thinks it can wait till next year, 
thinks its all okay and you don’t need help.

Those people never really live. 
They die long before their bodies ever give out on them.

I pray you will not be that person. 
But if you do,

God Bless.

If not….
email me back and let’s get you ROCKIN’ out your life now!!!!

LISTEN TO THIS NOW!

So where the F-ck Are You At?
Are you ready to claim your life, your orgasm, your abundance?

Or are you SETTLING?

As always, 
Stop Existing & Start Living

For more coaching, truth shares and awakened education join me for 1+1 coaching via phone, zoom or in person. Or follow me on Facebook for my morning FREE Conscious Coffee Broadcasts where I share truth bombs and alignment asskickery.

Fear Has You By The Ball’s. – Don’t Even Try to Deny It.

If you knew you were limitless what would you do?

 
This is the question that I am batting around today.
I have answered it repeatedly.
I have answered it from a place of fear,
A place of strength and faith,
A place of courage,
A place of cockiness.
However the last few days as I pause in my life to see where I am,
To feel where I am going,
to take notice of my alignment or lack there of,
I find myself asking this question yet again.
 
If I knew I was limitless what would I do?
Who would I be?
What would I have?
 
Tapping into the reality of our limitless potential is one mother f-cking scary thing to do.
 
Just typing this here has my stomach in knots,
I feel the excitement. I feel the joy. I feel the fear, the worry.
I feel all my bullshit of I am NOT good enough coming up.
 
But most of all I feel myself craving it.
 
Yes the last few days I have been blessed with God bringing to me my calling at a deeper level than before. People dance into my life and bring messages of what I am to be doing, whom I am suppose to wo with, what my soul message is.
 
The message of soul is calling so loud these days it is difficult for me to hear anything else.
The issue with soul screaming at me is my own lack of worthiness.
You know that feeling.
You want it but you don’t deserve it.
You want it but your not smart enough,
good looking enough,
compassionate enough,
loving enough,
patient enough.
 
You are not a good enough person.
Who are you to believe that you could ever have that or be that.
 
Yes those feelings.
All stemming back to putting on BIG shoes that you do not feel you can fill properly.
You may be saying, ” Kendal, I am not cut out for these shoe’s. – I am not a leader. I am just a person, an average person who has no message to change the world. “
 
Well, if this is true then you are most likely one f-cking happy person.
You have no pressure from soul to question your reality.
You have no inclination to want for more or be more.
You are feeling comfortable, at peace and love with your chosen career, your chosen world, your chosen relationships and everything. Life is just glorious and you couldn’t ask for more.

 

If that is the case, then CONGRATULATIONS!!!!

We are all happy for you.
Bless you.
 
However, I am betting that this is not the case or you would not be following me or reading this right now.
 
You want more.
You know that more is out there.
You are being called in some fashion to be more.
To stand out and do something.
Something that scares the living sh*t out of you.
 
I understand.
I am there with you.
I sat down today and wrote out my manifestations, I did my daily call in of blessing and I then turned and did some inner work from my mentor. I FINALLY grew the balls to answer some journal prompts she gave me in May that I had been avoiding out of the fear of my own success.
 
I just let my hands write whatever came to them and I felt so much fear rise up in me that I had tears come down my cheeks. My heart started vibrating, my intestines started to churn and felt like I needed to do anything else that would not be this work. I wanted to avoid my truth.
 
I sat there at my breakfast table and got REAL with myself.
 

REALITY CHECK:

Girl you are scared of your greatness.
You are fearful of your power.
 
Fear of looking a certain way.
Fear of appearing too much.
Fear of appearing cocky and self-centered.
Fear of loosing relationships in your life.
Fear of not having enough energy, time or knowledge.
 
Yes I am holding my f-cking self back.
 
That was my wake up call this morning at 10-AM.
 

Well F-CK this SH*T!

If I continue to hold back based on my fear then and ONLY then do I not deserve to have the blessings pour down on me.
 
Then and only then am I accepting failure.
 
God know’s what he is doing.
He is the Alpha and the Omega.
He is the beginning and the end.
He is everywhere and everything.
 
So this calling inside my soul is there because God put it there.
All I have to do is have faith and get into my mother f_cking alignment.
Just allow myself the GREATNESS.
Stop fearing that karma will bite me in the ass if I appear someway that I have been taught is not socially acceptable.
Stop fearing that the people I love and cherish will abandon ship when I get this boat a rockin’.
Stop fearing that I am not limitless but instead crazy.
 
At my core I know that if I want to see my crazy, well I need not look any further than my fear.
 
And what I am fearing ultimately?
I am fearing my greatness.
My limitlessness.
My desire.
My success.
My BIGNESS.
My power.
 
I am fearing my alignment with God.
Taking that leap into the unknown of alignment means that I must open up to HAVING IT ALL.
 
And who am I to believe that I can have it all?
After all, I have f-cked up so much in my life.
I am far from a perfect person.
I am no saint.
I am just a mom, just a woman, just human.
There is nothing GREAT about me.
 
Or so I have been told to believe for years from society.
 
Funny fact is that this “stuff” these sh*t beliefs have never fully been my reality.
God speaks to my heart daily.
I call in his presence daily with my gratitude prayers, with my written word, with my awareness of his messages and guidance in every breath I take.
I truly feel blessed and KNOW that God has my back.
It is ONLY when I doubt it that he seem’s to vanish from my life.
 
So why now do I hesitate?
Why now am I having issues with casting my desires out and commanding them with the spirit of Moses parting the red sea to manifest?
 
Why do I doubt?
 
FEAR.
Satan has a hold of my heart and he has his nasty nails in me. They speak to me from a place that is dark and scary.
They tell me that I will loose.
They confirm that I will be abandoned first by those I cherish, then by society, then by God himself and that I should just not step forward on this path.
 
Yes Satan is there whispering his terrifying messages in my ear.
Pressing in on what I have been told already and telling me that God will be disappointed in me if I shine to bright, because I am no body.
 
I am unimportant.
I am small.
I am not enough.
 
Fingers point to all my failures of the past.
And Satan sits there assuring me that he has my best interest at hand.
That the smartest thing to do is to cower and dim myself.
The world is not a safe place, so I must guard my heart and my light and keep it to myself.
 

WTF!!!!

Why do we listen to this sh*t?

 
Because we fear change.
Because we know the boat will rock and when we are through the transformation we will no longer be whom we were when we got started.
We fear loss of all that we have and are often willing to sacrifice all that we desire to maintain what we have.
We are often willing to sacrifice ourselves even to not loose what we feel so comfortable with in the hear and now.
 
Yes it is fear of nothing but shadow’s that stops us from living our desired life.
 
From being our full potential.

Which is LIMITLESS.

 
I say no to this fear every day.
I see it, I feel it, I witness it’s evil ways,
And I CHOOSE to keep claiming my life.
 
So f-ck off Satan.
F-ck off fear.
You have no power over me.

MY LIGHT WILL SHINE.

 
F-cking bright as hell too.
 
Embrace your light NOW!
Listen to that Call of Soul.
 
God want’s you to surrender to your blessings.
You are LIMITLESS.
If you will ONLY Believe.
 

Stop Existing & Start Living

Join Kendal TODAY for a F*ck Yes Life experience. Limited time access to 1:1 coaching and online coaching programs to help you master your FREEDOM based life NOW.

This is the shit that scares you the most! And it is BULLSHIT.

“LET’S TALK ABOUT THE THING. WHICH YOU’VE BEEN IGNORING. AND IT’S TIME, TO DO, NOW.

Can we talk about this? The thing that you’ve been ignoring, pretending you don’t know about, refusing to tune into, as you cover your ears and close your eyes and scrunch up your face and INSIST-
That there’s not a thing, there never WAS a thing, you know NOTHING about the thing and you’re actually taking FUCKLOADS of impressive action, thank you very much, so who the hell is mentioning a thing?
Yeppppp –
THAT thing.
Come on now… no need to get upset, or sigh, or act so weary about it. I KNOW you freaking WANT to talk about it!!!! I know you’re actually DESPERATE to do so, but not just to talk, but scream, and shout, and let it all the way out. You want to bathe in it, bask in it, you want to BE it, you want to eat it and breathe it and rub it all over you.” – Kat Lorenzo
That thing which you know you WANT!
That thing that you spoke about way back when when you found the courage to reach out and do and proclaim to the Universe and G-d that you wanted something better for your life, something better for your relationships, your love and YOUR SEX!
Yepppppp –
THAT thing.
I find that once we take action and reach out to get the help that we need in our healing and transformation that life starts to move and we experience more chaos, more fear, and YES more excuses as to why we should not, cannot do THAT THING.
OR…
Life say’s YOU don’t REALLY need help achieving these desires.  No, you got this on your own.
If that were true then you would have had it a long fucking ass time ago and things would not have brought you into the idea of reaching out for assistance about it to begin with.  You would NOT even be reading this right now.
But that is not the case…

IS IT?

So when are you going to take action?
When are you going to make YOURSELF priority in your life and not just “HOPE” that you got this thing but actually do what is needed to get you this THING?
I know, you don’t have:
  • the time
  • the money
  • the energy
  • the support
BULLSHIT!
I have said this myself so many times about so many valuable things and looking back I see how those were nothing more than excuses supporting my fear and supporting me to stay put right where I was at.
Where I DID NOT want to be. 
When I made up my mind to make myself a priority and to have the life that I wanted, the excuses turned into brainstorms of how I could make it work. I called out and asked for the support that I needed. I asked for the help to find the time, the money, the energy and the support needed from those around me.
I can tell you that making the commitment is the hardest part of the starting line.
Then sticking to your commitment is the next hardest part. Everything is going to get in your way.
Here is the thing, ” In order to have what you want, you have to make the familiar unfamiliar and the unfamiliar, familiar.” 
 
Did you get that?
 
Read it again.
 
Are you willing to do this though or are you one of the average and ordinary folks who just allow life to take them where ever and believe that in not making a choice, a commitment that you are “going with the flow” and allowing the universe to lead you?
 
Commitment breeds success!
You have sent out your desires, needs and hopes with the Universe. Your heart holds them. Your soul craves them. 
You might even be doing some of the things needed to achieve this thing: 
  • Meditation
  • Journaling
  • Reading
  • Positive Thinking and speaking
  • NLP work
  • Practicing Gratitude
  • Practicing some form of conscious touch or work
  • Eating higher vibration foods
  • Exercising
  • Writing down your goals
  • Sticking to the agenda to achieve these goals
  • Getting your “O” on even.
  • And so much more.

But how certain are you that your desired Fuck YES! Life is there waiting on you? And why the hell are you making it wait on you?

This is like saying, ” I am waiting for my ship to come in.” – Don’t fucking wait on your ship or on that relationship, the job, the house, the travel, the health or anything else. Swim out and get it!

Otherwise you might as well just accept that you are choosing to vanish off the planet without ever achieving your desires.

And this is not G-d’s wish. It is not the Universes wish. 
YOU my sweet reader were created for greatness!
YOU my  sweet reader were created to live out loud, on purpose and full of life!
YOU were created for a Fuck YES! Life.
It is here waiting for you.
But, there is ONE minor problem.
You are too scared to go after it.
Which means that you don’t really want it, because you think it is too big of a risk to get. You believe that what everyone in your life has told you up to this point about how your not:
  • smart enough
  • worthy enough
  • pretty enough’healthy enough
  • lucky enough

Or whatever the fuck else they have said is YOUR TRUTH.

BULLSHIT!!!!

If you slow down enough to analyze what real risk is you will find out that the biggest risk in life is not LIVING.
Not living CONSCIOUSLY.
Not living on PURPOSE.
Not living ORGASMICALLY.

“The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing, and becomes nothing. He may avoid suffering and sorrow, but he simply cannot learn and feel and change and grow and love and live.” – Leo Buscaglia

You know what though? You cannot ever avoid sorrow and suffering.

Ask yourself if NOT living up to your greatness in ALL WAYS possible is a comfort that is worth the sacrifice of the life that G-d/Universe designed and desires you to have?

Does this mediocre but comfortable way of being make you happy?

If you answer yes then…
Okay, you don’t want it.
So STOP reading this post.
STOP attempting to act like you want it or that you want change.
Get real with yourself.
Be authentic.
Whether you play small or big in life, just choose and LIVE IT!
But here is the thing…. 

YOU Still deserve that Fuck YES Life.

I wish you believed in you the way I believe you.

-KW

Polyamory vs. Monogamy: What Do You Think?

woman2menI know that I have many people that I am working with who are coming to a point in their lives and relationships where having and “Open Relationship” has become appealing to them. But there is much concern as to if it is dangerous or not to have this sort of sexual/intimate relating and the main causes of concern are:
* How will jealousy play a role?
* Won’t one or both of us feel like the other is not invested or committed as much anymore?
* What happen’s if I truly love two people at the same time? Is this manageable or will it destroy the relationships?
* Does having multiple partners increase my chances of catching a sexually transmitted disease?
* What about time management?
* How do I deal with what other’s think? i.e. friends, parents, children, etc.
* How do I bring up the conversation of opening my primary relationship?
Just to name a few concerns….

I am not going to address all of this here, as this list of concerns is a whole workshop in it’s own. However, I do want to say that I agree with Dan Savage on his comeback and I will state that for the last four years I have been blessed to enjoy a deep loving, authentic relating and sexually open relationship with my two lovers. Both men fulfill me in different aspects. My relationship is unique with each and yet similar.

Last year I opened a channel of communication of allowing each of them to ask me five question’s, they could be any question and I agreed to answer 100% authentically no matter how hard it may be to state my truth. My primary partner Scott asked me, ” Have you ever considered a primary relationship with B?” – My response and the honest truth was, “Yes.” How could I have not? Here is a man I adore and love with my heart, soul and body just as I feel for Scott, I feel for B. Each man pulling to my surface an aspect of myself that without his presence I would not get a chance to explore, heal and love. Each man compliments my internal masculine in a similar but different fashion and allow’s me to be stronger in my divine feminine. Each open’s me and teaches me how to expand my heart, surrender more fully, and accept more gracefully the lead of the divine masculine.

In all honesty, I cannot, nor do I ever wish to imagine or experience my life without each of these gentlemen in it. Do I need either of them? No. I feel strong enough in myself and my path to say that I make the conscious choice each day to open myself to each of them and dance in life with them. It is not a state of need and therefore jealousy does not play a strong role in my relating. I am not with either of them to try and change them into someone that I believe they should be either. Therefore I am able to step away from much of my ego based issues and just enjoy each of them for who they are in the moment and how they each choose to show up in life with me.

As far as sexually transmitted diseases and open relationship’s go, just an FYI that monogamy does not mean security. Many studies have been done in recent years to see if polyamorous people are more likely to catch a sexually transmitted diseases than monogamous people. The stat’s were about equal. But how is this possible if one group of people are only sleeping with the same person and the other group has multiple partners?

Well, here is the truth.
When people cheat they do not think to have safe sex. They do not use a condom most of the time.
When people are involved in an open lifestyle they typically know that they have to have these conversations about diseases, protection and when someone got tested or not. They also think about boundaries, safe words, precautions and deeper levels of authentic communication that many monogamous people never consider. Does this mean that you can’t enjoy bare sex with two partners or that it is a bad idea? The answer here is no. Of course you can enjoy bare sex with two partners, as long as all partners are on board with it and communication is in place as well as taking into consideration that bare sex is a symbol of deep connection, trust and COMMITMENT. So if anyone decides to bring in another party then the safety jackets are back on.

Having an open relationship or multiple partners DOES NOT mean that you love less. It means that you LOVE MORE! This sort of relating when done in a mature, proactive, no ego driven or need fashion can be very healing and a great teacher. Is it for everyone? No. But should it be condemned or stated that such a relationship between 3, 4 or even 5 people cannot last long term? No again. Most monogomous relationships end in divorce after years of fighting, suffering and sexless relating. Do these long term relationships seem successful? If you answered yes then you may need to examine what your view of success is and then ask yourself if they are really examples of unconditional love too. Then look at an open relationship such as Dan Savage and his wife, shared below….

Successful? Unconditionally loving?
You be the judge.

–KW

Dan Savage at Inforum 9460747644 cropped to Savage

Dan Savage’s devastating reply to Helen Fisher

That New York Times story a couple days ago?The Secrets to an Open Marriage According to Mo’Nique?Which quoted the once-respected anthropologist Helen Fisher saying she just somehow knows these things “never end up working long-term”?

Dan Savage just published a takedown:

Dan Savage in 2013
…The Oscar-winning actress [Mo’Nique] and her husband [Sidney Hicks] are double rarity: not just a straight couple who aren’t in the closet about their open marriage, but a famous straight couple in an openly open marriage.

…[Writer Tammy] La Gorce gets a few quotes from someone who comes across as pretty sane about open marriages — Douglas LaBier, a psychologist and the director of the Center for Progressive Development — but La Gorce pretty much hands the rest of the piece over to someone who has clearly lost her mind: Helen Fisher, author, “biological anthropologist at the Kinsey Institute” (RIP Kinsey Institute), and shill for a dating website, where Fisher has been doing important research on the best strategy for getting a second date (take ’em out for sushi) and what it means when a person uses a lot of emojis (they’re horny as fuck).

…Where to start?

With Fisher’s insulting claim to know better than Mo’Nique and Hicks about how the Mo’Nique and Hicks really feel about their marriage? (They only think they’re happy, those deluded human animals!) With Fisher’s yanked-from-her-ass assertions about evolutionary pressures that supposedly endowed all modern humans with genes that allow for just one type of romantic “bond” (only pairs, always sexually exclusive!) and just one successful “mating process” (only pairs, again, and it’s all about the kids!)? With Fisher’s assertion — offered without any data to back it up — that open marriages “never end up working long-term”?

Let’s start with that.

“Just because there is a lack of good data on the longevity of open relationships does not mean that ‘they never work out,'” said Dr. Debby Herbenick, a research scientist at Indiana University. “Saying ‘they never work out’ goes beyond any data she has; I would ask her to prove it. Where are her data? I know of none to support that.”

Dr. Herbenick has data that contradicts Fisher’s “they never work out” and “all people in non-monogamous couples are secretly miserable” bullshit.

“Similar proportions of men in monogamous and open relationships say they are happy in their relationship and sexually satisfied,” said Dr. Herbenick, citing ACTUAL FUCKING DATA from the IU School of Public Health’s 2014 National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior. “For women, more women in monogamous relationships say that they are happy in their relationship and sexually satisfied. But that doesn’t mean none are happy or satisfied, as plenty are.”

…On a personal note/anecdote: my husband and I recently celebrated our 21st anniversary and our marriage has been open for 17 of those years. Hey, maybe Terry and I need Helen Fisher to swing by the house and explain to us how we’re really secretly miserable, just like Mo’Nique and Hicks….

Moving on…

Fisher’s bizarre theory of brain adjacency: the chunks of our brainz involved in romantic love are located near the chunks of brainz that “orchestrate” thirst and hunger and that’s why there’s no such thing as a successful open marriage. CASE CLOSED!

That sounded like complete bullshit — and not just to me.

“It is a rather odd claim to say that the reason a phenotypic trait will operate the way it does is because a particular brain region responsible for it is adjacent to other brain regions which do something else,” said Dr. Qazi Rahman, King’s College London. “That kind of model of brain-behaviour relationships would generate all sorts of very odd predictions which most neuroscientists or neuropsychologists would find strange. But then all behaviour and mental activity is ‘in the brain’ and so I’m not clear making these sorts of claims does any useful explanatory work for behavioural scientists.”

“There is an entire network of the brain involved in romantic love,” said Dr. James Pfaus…. [Fisher] doesn’t get it. She has never gotten it. Her view of the brain is a neurochemical phrenology.”

…”I spoke with Helen at a conference once,” a researcher who did not wish to be identified told me in an email. “Helen said there is a single gene that will determine whether a man cheats or not. We carefully explained why this couldn’t be so.”

Fisher, like so many other hacks in the love-and-relationship racket, wants sex and love and marriage to work in a certain way — they insist it only works this one way — and this monogamist bias informs and distorts Fisher’s work.

“I enjoy Helen’s stuff, but think she’s blind to her cultural bias on this one,” said Dr. David Ley. “I’d be interested in whether she truly thinks monogamy ‘works’ long-term, given divorce and infidelity rates. I think the most damaging piece of Fisher’s approach is her generalization of her beliefs to all humans. The valuable thing about modern relationships is the ability to individually negotiate a relationship, based upon each partners’ needs, strengths and deficits.”…

ORIGINAL ARTICLE

The last word: He said he was leaving. She ignored him.

When Laura Munson’s husband asked for a divorce, she ducked instead of fighting. He needed to learn, she says, that his unhappiness wasn’t really about her.

couplehandholding

Let’s say you have what you believe to be a healthy marriage. You’re still friends and lovers after spending more than half of your lives together. The dreams you set out to achieve in your 20s—gazing into each other’s eyes in candlelit city bistros, when you were single and skinny—have for the most part come true.

Two decades later you have the 20 acres of land, the farmhouse, the children, the dogs and horses. You’re the parents you said you would be, full of love and guidance. You’ve done it all: Disneyland, camping, Hawaii, Mexico, city living, stargazing.

Sure, you have your marital issues, but on the whole you feel so self-satisfied about how things have worked out that you would never, in your wildest nightmares, think you would hear these words from your husband one fine summer day: “I don’t love you anymore. I’m not sure I ever did. I’m moving out. The kids will understand. They’ll want me to be happy.”

But wait. This isn’t the divorce story you think it is. Neither is it a begging-him-to-stay story. It’s a story about hearing your husband say, “I don’t love you anymore” and deciding not to believe him. And what can happen as a result.

Here’s a visual: Child throws a temper tantrum. Tries to hit his mother. But the mother doesn’t hit back, lecture or punish. Instead, she ducks. Then she tries to go about her business as if the tantrum isn’t happening. She doesn’t “reward” the tantrum. She simply doesn’t take the tantrum personally because, after all, it’s not about her.

Let me be clear: I’m not saying my husband was throwing a child’s tantrum. No. He was in the grip of something else—a profound and far more troubling meltdown that comes not in childhood but in midlife, when we perceive that our personal trajectory is no longer arcing reliably upward as it once did. But I decided to respond the same way I’d responded to my children’s tantrums. And I kept responding to it that way. For four months.

“I don’t love you anymore. I’m not sure I ever did.”

His words came at me like a speeding fist, like a sucker punch, yet somehow in that moment I was able to duck. And once I recovered and composed myself, I managed to say, “I don’t buy it.” Because I didn’t.

He drew back in surprise. Apparently he’d expected me to burst into tears, to rage at him, to threaten him with a custody battle. Or beg him to change his mind.

So he turned mean. “I don’t like what you’ve become.”

Gut-wrenching pause. How could he say such a thing? That’s when I really wanted to fight. To rage. To cry. But I didn’t.

Instead, a shroud of calm enveloped me, and I repeated those words: “I don’t buy it.”

You see, I’d recently committed to a non-negotiable understanding with myself. I’d committed to “the End of Suffering.” I’d finally managed to exile the voices in my head that told me my personal happiness was only as good as my outward success, rooted in things that were often outside my control. I’d seen the insanity of that equation and decided to take responsibility for my own happiness. And I mean all of it.

My husband hadn’t yet come to this understanding with himself. He had enjoyed many years of hard work, and its rewards had supported our family of four all along. But his new endeavor hadn’t been going so well, and his ability to be the breadwinner was in rapid decline. He’d been miserable about this, felt useless, was losing himself emotionally and letting himself go physically. And now he wanted out of our marriage; to be done with our family.

But I wasn’t buying it.

I said: “It’s not age-appropriate to expect children to be concerned with their parents’ happiness. Not unless you want to create co-dependents who’ll spend their lives in bad relationships and therapy. There are times in every relationship when the parties involved need a break. What can we do to give you the distance you need, without hurting the family?”

“Huh?” he said.

“Go trekking in Nepal. Build a yurt in the back meadow. Turn the garage studio into a man-cave. Get that drum set you’ve always wanted. Anything but hurting the children and me with a reckless move like the one you’re talking about.”

Then I repeated my line, “What can we do to give you the distance you need, without hurting the family?”

“Huh?”

“How can we have a responsible distance?”

“I don’t want distance,” he said. “I want to move out.”

My mind raced. Was it another woman? Drugs? Unconscionable secrets? But I stopped myself. I would not suffer.

Instead, I went to my desk, Googled “responsible separation,” and came up with a list. It included things like: Who’s allowed to use what credit cards? Who are the children allowed to see you with in town? Who’s allowed keys to what?

I looked through the list and passed it on to him.

His response: “Keys? We don’t even have keys to our house.”

I remained stoic. I could see pain in his eyes. Pain I recognized.

“Oh, I see what you’re doing,” he said. “You’re going to make me go into therapy. You’re not going to let me move out. You’re going to use the kids against me.”

“I never said that. I just asked: What can we do to give you the distance you need … ”

“Stop saying that!”

Well, he didn’t move out.

Instead, he spent the summer being unreliable. He stopped coming home at his usual 6 o’clock. He would stay out late and not call. He blew off our entire Fourth of July—the parade, the barbecue, the fireworks—to go to someone else’s party. When he was at home, he was distant. He wouldn’t look me in the eye. He didn’t even wish me “Happy Birthday.”

But I didn’t play into it. I walked my line. I told the kids: “Daddy’s having a hard time, as adults often do. But we’re a family, no matter what.” I was not going to suffer. And neither were they.

My trusted friends were irate on my behalf. “How can you just stand by and accept this behavior? Kick him out! Get a lawyer!”

I walked my line with them, too. This man was hurting, yet his problem wasn’t mine to solve. In fact, I needed to get out of his way so he could solve it.

I know what you’re thinking: I’m a pushover. I’m weak and scared and would put up with anything to keep the family together. I’m probably one of those women who would endure physical abuse. But I can assure you, I’m not. I load 1,500-pound horses into trailers and gallop through the high country of Montana all summer. I went through Pitocin-induced natural childbirth. And a Caesarean section without follow-up drugs. I am handy with a chain saw.

I simply had come to understand that I was not at the root of my husband’s problem. He was. If he could turn his problem into a marital fight, he could make it about us. I needed to get out of the way so that wouldn’t happen.

Privately, I decided to give him time. Six months.

I had good days and I had bad days. On the good days, I took the high road. I ignored his lashing out, his merciless jabs. On bad days, I would fester in the August sun while the kids ran through sprinklers, raging at him in my mind. But I never wavered. Although it may sound ridiculous to say, “Don’t take it personally” when your husband tells you he no longer loves you, sometimes that’s exactly what you have to do.

Instead of issuing ultimatums, yelling, crying, or begging, I presented him with options. I created a summer of fun for our family and welcomed him to share in it, or not—it was up to him. If he chose not to come along, we would miss him, but we would be just fine, thank you very much. And we were.

And, yeah, you can bet I wanted to sit him down and persuade him to stay. To love me. To fight for what we’ve created. You can bet I wanted to.

But I didn’t.

I barbecued. Made lemonade. Set the table for four. Loved him from afar.

And one day, there he was, home from work early, mowing the lawn. A man doesn’t mow his lawn if he’s going to leave it. Not this man. Then he fixed a door that had been broken for eight years. He made a comment about our front porch needing paint. Our front porch. He mentioned needing wood for next winter. The future. Little by little, he started talking about the future.

It was Thanksgiving dinner that sealed it. My husband bowed his head humbly and said, “I’m thankful for my family.”

He was back.

And I saw what had been missing: pride. He’d lost pride in himself. Maybe that’s what happens when our egos take a hit in midlife and we realize we’re not as young and golden anymore.

When life’s knocked us around. And our childhood myths reveal themselves to be just that. The truth feels like the biggest sucker-punch of them all: It’s not a spouse, or land, or a job, or money that brings us happiness. Those achievements, those relationships, can enhance our happiness, yes, but happiness has to start from within. Relying on any other equation can be lethal.

My husband had become lost in the myth. But he found his way out. We’ve since had the hard conversations. In fact, he encouraged me to write about our ordeal. To help other couples who arrive at this juncture in life. People who feel scared and stuck. Who believe their temporary feelings are permanent. Who see an easy out and think they can escape.

My husband tried to strike a deal. Blame me for his pain. Unload his feelings of personal disgrace onto me.

But I ducked. And I waited. And it worked.

This essay originally appeared in The New York Times. Used with permission. All rights reserved.

This post comes from Theweek.com August 13, 2009

 

Are you stuck in story?

are-you-stuck-on-story

Why do you need stories? Stories give shape to experience and allow you to go through life with clarity. Without stories, life events and experiences would float around in some nebulous cloud and none of it would mean anything. When you have a particular viewpoint of what happened, the wonderful aspects of being human can come into play. You can laugh, feel inspired, be compassionate, become outraged, and become motivated to change things. They help you connect and feel less alone. They are your guidepost, your prayers, your history and the vehicle to discovering and expressing your soul. There are stories that celebrate and others that offer you a challenge.

Stories reflect your perception of events, experiences and the world. They influence your interactions with others, the quality of your relationships, your sense of emotional well-being, and even your physical health. They shape your expectations, who you believe you can become, or can achieve in life. Your story affects how easily you steer through change, and it can keep you stuck in cycles of stress, worry, and fear. It is your interpretation of what you believe to be true. This rendition is based on your beliefs and weave together to create a story about who you are and how the world works.

If these perceptions and interpretations are reinforced by your environment, the more real they appear and the truer the story seems. The story becomes so engrained that you believe it is the only one that could exist. Your perspective then becomes your truth. The question is, does it support you?

Why do you stay in the stories you create? Story helps you understand the world and assimilate your experience of it, providing you with a view point. Sometimes that becomes contorted. Your unconscious beliefs are like an invisible story line that you carry around all the time. For example, if you adopted the belief that you are not significant, you carry the “I’m insignificant” story. Everywhere you go you are projecting, “This is the story of who I am and how the world works for me. You are requesting others to assume the illusion is true, and help sustain it.” There are plenty of people who are willing to cooperate with you.

How do you change the story? Einstein said that you can’t solve a problem at the same level of consciousness that created it. To change the story you need to look at reality in an entirely new way. Transformation comes when you change the question from “what is this person doing to create this feeling I am experiencing?” This inquiry does not claim ownership of your perception which might be flawed. A more self-aware question might be, “If this reaction is occurring, what story line am I carrying?” Doing this you become aware of the story line, and it gives you the opportunity to change it. You can choose to let go of a limiting belief and respond differently. When you look at your “reality” in a new way. You get less stuck in reacting, and you learn how to clear the beliefs that make up the story. Your awareness grows and you learn to participate in the story you are creating. As a result, the story no longer rules you and your experience of reality changes. I encourage those wanting to explore this further to read Byron Katie’s book Loving What Is.

Lynn Zambrano R.N. is an energy intuitive, healer and life coach. Her sessions are filled with compassion and designed to reveal your personalized, heart-centered guidance. Connect with her on Twitter and Facebook, or email Lynn at Lightminded1@yahoo.com. You can also visit her website at www.Light-Minded.com Lynn is co-host with TrustClaire on her BTR show on Mondays at 5:30 EST, and is also highlighted on Top American Healers .

References:

http://www.nieman.harvard.edu/reports/article/101486/Why-We-Need-St…

http://www.powerctr.com/

ORIGINAL POST on OM Times