Never Stop Manifesting The Cup of Coffee

About 20+ years ago I started focusing in on the law of attraction.
I wanted to take charge of my manifesting and I wanted to create the life of my dreams.
Having always been spiritually focused,
and enjoying quantum physics for my pleasure reading,
it came to me that this thing known as the Law of Attraction might be worth investigating.
After all there was a history of exploration around it.
Anyone who has ever read Think and Grow Rich, or any of Napoleon Hill’s work as well Earl Nightingale, Dale Carnegie or Norman Vincent Peale just to name a few greats, I am sure would agree that there must be something to this law.

Through the course of time,
I have had many a positive and a negative experience with the law. The thing that I have had the toughest concept with was personal responsibility.

Yes responsibility.
We are each responsible for what is coming into our manifestation zone.
What we are attracting to us.
It is difficult to take responsibility for the crap that manifests in our lives.
I am sure that you would agree.
It is hard to look at these things and say with certainty and even enthusiasm,
“Yes! I did that. – I attracted that. – I own it.”

I mean how often do we want to own the random flat tire,
the hot water heater blowing up, the car accident, the personal injury, the job or relationship loss?

We never want to own these things.
yet this is where the power of our manifestation is seen and we MUST pay attention too.

I will even go to the level that we should be excited about the sh*t that manifests,
as it shows us that we are manifestors.
And damn good one’s at that.

Owning our power means that we do not ignore any manifesting that we have going on for ourselves.
It means that we have to be just as full of gratitude for the free random coffee that we manifested to the flat tire.

It is all us.
It all came from our thought vibration.
And this is where we learn our truth.

Are you sitting there, reading this and agreeing?
or are you disagreeing?
It does not matter BTW.
It just is.

That is the thing about universal laws.
they don’t care if we believe in them or not,
they still happen according to their design.
It is up to us to become conscious and start making use of them to our consistent benefit ( manifesting what we perceive as positive) or remain unconscious and just let the cards fall will they will.

It is up to each of us.

However, if we choose to CLAIM OUR LIVES,
if we choose to move forward toward the F-ck Yes! Life,
then we MUST become conscious of this law.
We must start to own all of our manifestations,
not just those that feel good to us.

I so often hear people say,
“So I started using the law of attraction 5 years ago.”

LOL….
This cracks my ass up.

“Started using…”
Honey, you were born using the law of attraction.
You use it every moment of your life.
You use it in your waking hours,
you use it in your sleeping hours.
You use it when you are pooping,
when you are eating,
when you are having sex,
or an argument.
When you are paying your bills,
or when you are on vacation.
There is NEVER a moment that you are not using the law of attraction.

It is about THOUGHT VIBRATION.

And if you “think” you are “thinking the right thoughts” but crap just keeps manifesting in your life,
then guess what?

YOU ARE STINKING THINKING.

It is not rocket science baby.
It is a universal law,
a law that is based on the frequency that your thoughts are sending out.
That is it.

The ONLY other component that matters to it,
is how you feel about these thoughts.

The emotions attached to these thoughts.

If you are sold hook line and sinker on the fact that you will always be living pay check to pay check,
or that you will never find love,
or you will never have the body you want,
or whatever it is that you are CERTAIN that you cannot have,
then guess what baby?
You are right.

And feel that feeling,
that sensation in your body as you think about not having it.
Feel that anxiety,
that sadness,
that disappointment,
that anger.

If you are waking with a subconscious thought that is affirming that you cannot have,
and you wake with one of these sensations,
then it should just make sense that you not manifest ANYTHING other than things that support these feelings.
So you pour hot coffee on yourself,
you break a dish,
you scratch the side of your car,
your shoes don’t feel right,
you feel bloated,
etc.
etc.

The opposite is true to though luv.

If you wake with a feeling of gratitude,
a feeling of love in your heart, ‘excitement for the day,
for life and all that you can make happen.

If you feel into how good it feels to wake up,
and KNOW that you are the CREATOR of your world,
that you are so supported.

So very supported.
The whole universe wants to give you what you want.
What you are VIBING TOO.
So all you have to do is BE HAPPY.
And more things that make you happy will manifest like magic into your world.

F-ck YES!!!!!!

This is the F-ck Yes!! Life that I coach on.
This is what I help people every day achieve.
This is the life that I wake to daily,
and if I don’t then I consciously make up my mind to change my VIBE ASAP.

Today,
today is like any other.
Today I woke,
I was tired, but I stretched and said my gratitudes before my feet hit the ground.
I moved on through my moments of motherhood,
of taking tired kids to school,
I dealt with my ex and christmas items,
I looked at some bills,
and I drove in rush hour traffic to take my daughter almost 2 hours away to state testing for homeschool.

And you know what?
I walked into the conference space that her testing was at,
fifteen minutes early,
I laughed and connected with the ladies who were setting everything up for the students and a few moments later,
one of the women said,
” Excuse me mam, would you be interested in a white mocha latte from Starbucks? It is untouched. I ordered it on accident for someone who is not here. Do you want it?”

F-ck Yes!!!!
A small manifestation.
But showing where my VIBE is.

I said yes and gave my thanks.
I opened to receiving.

I said yes.
And gave gratitude. (KEYS to receiving more)

often in the start of awaking to the law of attraction,
we are told to just go manifest a cup of coffee.

I want to say,
NEVER STOP MANIFESTING THAT CUP OF COFFEE.

Your belief of your power starts and is consistently supported here.

So what will you manifest today?

As always,
Stop Existing & Start Living

If you are ready to make the leap then reach out to me today. I am running a Christmas special where you get 2-months of coaching for FREE. Check it out and use the SANTAGIFT code in the why you want to work with me section. HERE

Never Ready to Say Yes.

Epiphany Time.
Yep,
here it is folks.
Here is what no one want’s to tell you but you must know if you are going to have the life that you want.
 
If you are going to stop just getting by and start THRIVING.
Yes if that is what you are wanting in life,
if you want to wake up with a start,
fully ignited, charged up and turned on to life.
If you are wanting to have that deeply intimate relationship,
you know the kind that makes your heart shutter when you hear your partners voice.
If you are wanting to truly experience life.
Truly enjoy your family,
your friends,
the world,
good health,
ABUNDANCE.
 
then let me share with you this.
 
The fact is….
 
You will NEVER EVER be ready.
If I waited till I was ready to do anything,
I would do nothing.
I would have no where near the things that I have today.
I certainly would not have the relationships that I have.
The sex that I have.
The turn on that I have.
I would not travel the way I do.
I would not have the booming business that I have.
I would never launch a freaking program or workshop.
I would never write an article or do a vlog.
I would simply NEVER.
 
And therefore I would not have the life that I have.
I would not,
because I would have been saying NO,
to myself and to life,
to success and abundance,
to love and joy,
instead of saying YES.
 
I share this because ’tis is the season that we get bombarded with things.
We feel overwhelmed, frustrated, stressed and we want for more.
We want for more because all that we don’t have is smack dab in front of our faces.
Our children ask for so much,
we are asked to donate of our resources,
even if we have no resources.
It is assumed that everyone is “holly and jolly”
and that everyone can just keep giving.
 
Giving to everyone.
Except self.
 
Well,
take it from this single mom of seven,
who has had little to no assistance from co-parents,
and who run’s her own business, and is the primary financial provider not only for 4 children in home,
but also for my mother with dementia.
 
I get it.
I truly get it.
 
And you know what,
just the other day,
my grown ass daughter stood in my kitchen,
and proclaimed, “Mom you are rich.”
She then assumed that she and just about anyone was in the right to ask for their hearts desires from me,
and that I could cover it,
and that I would.
 
 
LOL…
 
At first I got a little upset at her assumption.
I wondered how she could just think this,
and then I realized that she was right.
 
I am f-cking rich!
 
I am rich in opportunity.
I am rich in energy.
I am rich in love.
I am rich in creative flow.
I am rich in abundance.
 
And this is all that matters.
because from this sorta mindset,
the world is my oyster.
 
So, I smiled.
And I agreed.
My ego screamed at me about all the responsibilities that she was unaware of or ignoring.
My ego yelped at me about giving too much.
My ego made very clear that it was still stuck in old programs of scarcity and fear.
 
And here is where “I” and only I could make the difference.
It was up to me in this moment to claim something different for my life.
I could say that I was broke,
that I was tired,
that I was overwhelmed,
frustrated and full of fear.
Or….
I could agree with her view of me.
“Mom you are rich.”
 
Well guess what?
You don’t get this view of your life if you are not showing up rich in some way or another.
My kids have lived through really freaking hard times,
where we lost our home,
had our power off for weeks,
was without food or water.
Had to “go camping” to give shelter.
 
They know all too well the other side of the tracks.
 
Well guess what?
Guess what?
 
I was never ready for ANY of the things I had to do,
to get from there to here,
or the things that I have to do to get from here to multi seven figures.
 
Nope. Not ready.
I am not ready to take the steps needed to move into deeper intimacy with my lover.
I am not ready to take the steps to get the body that I want.
I am not ready to step up into the the leader that I want to be.
 
But THAT WON’T STOP ME.
because I get it.
 
I get that in order to have the F-ck Yes Life that I want,
I MUST be willing to level myself up,
before I am ready.
 
It is this one THING that sets me apart from so many.
It makes me not average and ordinary.
And you know what?
If you want what you want,
then the same is true for you.
 
So REALITY CHECK LOVE.
You will never be ready.
You will never ever be ready.
 
You make the call as to when you move forward.
When you claim your life.
When you START TO SAY YES.
 
Until then you are letting life dictate to you.
And you got no right to b*tch.
 
So what is it going to be?
 
——————————————————————
 
If you are ready to make the leap then reach out to me today. I am running a Christmas special where you get 2-months of coaching for FREE. Check it out and use the SANTAGIFT code in the why you want to work with me section.
 
As always,
Stop Existing & Start Living

Don’t Use Your Alignment As Your Excuse.

It’s all about alignment they say.
It’s all about just saying yes to the things that make you feel good, they say.
It’s all about flow, the law of attraction and the vortex they say.
 
Listen to your soul.
Listen to your heart.
And blessings will abound.
 
Yeah, yeah, f-cking yeah!
 
Okay folks,
you all know that I preach the same thing that leader and visionaries,
game changers, guru’s and greats have preached for ever.
 
There is no f-cking secret.
The secret is that we are responsible 💯% for the way our life manifests.
 
Yes there is the SECRET!
But we don’t like taking that sorta responsibility,
do we?
 
No.
We don’t.
I sure the f-ck have an issue with this wake up call,
like every damn morning,
and sometimes and noon and bedtime too.
Sh*t I wake up in the middle of the night sometimes,
freaking out about stuff.
 
Wondering why this is happening?
How am I going to get through it?
And what did I do to deserve such crap?
 
And THEN….
then I get smacked by spirit. 👊✝️🕉️✡️☯️💥👀
And I realize that I am laying there freaking out about stuff that I have no control over,
stuff that is other people’s business,
or stuff that more than likely will never happen.
 
All I am doing is increasing the odd’s of it happening because I am setting a tone in my thinking and feeling,
I am loosing sleep,
over crap.
 
And so I am aligning myself to a bad day.
And crap on the horizon.
 
or……………
 
What about we only do everything that is in alignment to ourselves.
 
What about,
we “pray” about it.
“Meditate” on it,
and “feel” into it.
 
To make sure that it aligns with us fully.
 
Yes, that is what we need to do to feel good,
have success, and get into flow.
 
This is where we manifest our greatness.
Yes!
 
Yes,
this is the answer.
After all….
 
This is what all the who’s who of flow, greatness and abundance do and always have known to work and be true.
 
RIGHT?
 
Yes.
 
So ya’ know what?
Putting my head down at 12:15am to write that article post that I do daily and missed the the time or focus to write the twelve hours prior, but don’t really feel like writing now either, I should skip till tomorrow.
 
Sitting down and putting together those course training pages after a stressful day of running around, dealing with drama, and feeling a little under the weather, sure does not feel in alignment with me right now either, so SKIP.
 
Doing that follow- up work with possible clients, researching a condition that I have never heard of but have a client with, figuring out new systems for my website, or writing that promotional email or page, just seem’s like too much right now. I sorta feel like I just don’t have the motivation, or the creative flow to do it….
I mean I want it to be in flow,
so I need to wait till I feel like I am in flow,
in alignment so that it comes together right,
and that is not right now,
so SKIP.
 
Man, I am so effing tired and sore,
no time for anything.
Exhausted. Feel like crap.
I sure don’t have time for yoga class today or that walk.
It won’t hurt if I take a day off.
SKIP.
 
Oh baby, I love you.
Oh baby, you complete me.
Oh baby, you are so perfect.
Fast forward 18 months…. 5 years… or what have you.
I just think we are no longer in alignment.
I mean, I know that she/he is still the same person of yesteryear, and we said that our dreams and goals were this, but I have now found myself and I know that you are not in alignment to me anymore.
Oh you want to talk,
you want to work on the relationship,
you are willing to change, grow,
sorry I am not in alignment to it.
BYE.
 
Get where I am going with this alignment idea?
 
Here is the reality,
the reality is that we tend to use alignment as an excuse to get out of the things that we don’t want to do.
 
Isn’t it funny that when we REALLY don’t want to do something,
when we REALLY feel lazy,
when we REALLY just want out of a situation,
that God/Spirit ALWAYS answers us with
 
that’s not in alignment,
 
when we pray or meditate on it.
when we feel into it.
 
OMFG!!!!
 
Really.
Just grow a f-cking pair and say that you don’t want too.
Don’t use God/spirit and alignment as your f-cking excuse
 
If you want to be in alignment and have all the wonders of your heart,
then one of the first things you need to achieve is to be in integrity with who you are, what you want, what your boundaries are, what your desire is, and where the f-ck your VOICE is located.
 
That is what God gave you a voice for.
To speak your TRUTH.
 
No matter what anyone else thinks about it,
when you stand strong in your needs, desires, and heart,
when you stand in authentic integrity with yourself
and with others,
then guess what?
 
Yep you nailed it.
 
Then you are in ALIGNMENT.
And you will align to your abundant life.
You will align to your blessings.
 
Anything else is a lie.
 
So it is your choice,
stay average and ordinary,
and speak lie’s to avoid your own fear of rejection and pain,
or
speak from your soul’s alignment,
which mean’s…..
 
BE TRUTHFUL.
 
As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
www.kendalwilliams.com
 
PS
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Wish you could figure out a side hustle that made you good part time money and was something that you enjoyed?
Want to know where to start?
With YOUR biz?
 
Let me show you what I have learned from the last two decades of being my own boss.
 
Take your business from where ever you are at,
even if you have not started yet,
to making $100k quickly.
 
These are the steps that you need to master your BOSS-HOOD!
 
Preliminary work has already been added.
LIVE training starts Sunday.
You can take this class from anywhere in the world to boot.
 

Admit It! – You Are F-cking LAZY.

Admit it…
Seriously JUST admit already.
 
😲YOU are lazy as F-ck! 🛌
You know what you need to do.
You feel it in your bones,
you have the know how,
the knowledge,
the ability.
 
Your soul calls out to you daily, and YOU HEAR IT. 🗣️🧘‍♀️
But when it comes right down to it,
catching up on the series on Netflix is more appealing.
Watching that football game is more interesting.
Cleaning your mother f-cking toilet is higher on your priority list than doing the thing that you know,
you know without a doubt that you MUST DO,
in order to have the life that you want to have.
 
But,
But you are too f-cking lazy to just step the f-ck into who you are meant to be to achieve those dreams and desires.
 
🔥🔥👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨👠💍🥂✈️💃💃🔥🔥
 
You see having that freedom based life,
living according to your souls desire,
in alignment with exactly who you know you were born to be is not difficult.
 
Not difficult at all matter a fact.
 
The ONLY f-cking thing holding you back from being the person that your soul wants you to be is yourself. 💃💃💃
 
It’s all those things you have been told through your life experience so far.
 
Its all those logical, fear based things that you opt to buy into,
because buying into them is what everyone else is doing,
therefore that must make it right.
 
Your lazy because…
being part of the norm is more important to you than being authentically you.
 
getting along with the crowd is what you “think” will make you happy…
instead of saying F-ck YES to who you are and letting yourself shine.
 
Agreeing,
being a people pleaser seems like the best thing to do,
it keeps the peace.
Instead of claiming what you need/want and EXPECT from life.
 
But all of this,
does not solve any thing baby.
 
All of this only leads you to pain, suffering and not truly living.
Sure there is air in your lungs,
you are breathing still,
your heart is beating,
your body is alive.
 
But YOU ARE NOT LIVING!!!!!
 
🔥🔥👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨👠💍🥂✈️💃💃🔥🔥
 
and worst off you know it.
 
You know that life could be so much more.
And you want it to be more.
You want more than to just try to escape your pain,
your anxiety,
you want to not have it to start with.
You want happiness!
 
And you should.
 
It is your birthright after all.
 
But happiness only comes from truly living in alignment to to you.
 
Happiness only is felt by owning your own joy.
By understanding that you,
YES YOU….
are the one that can make it happen.
AND MUST.
 
No pay raise at work will do it.
No bigger better orgasm will do it.
No change of relationship status will do it.
No weight loss or diet will do it.
No my kids are honor role students will do it.
No my retirement fund has so much money it will do it.
Not even the affirment from your pastor that you are saved will do it.
 
Nothing.
Absolutely NOTHING,
will bring you the happiness that your heart and soul desire,
that leads you to do everything that you do,
that makes you flip your world upside down,
or keep everything the same,
will make you happy.
 
The only thing that will ever bring you happiness…
 
Is getting up off your f-cking ass,
and LIVING!
 
Yes BABY!!!
this is what you must do to have what you want.
 
But wait!🖐️
 
That’s to easy!
 
If it were that simple,
then everyone would be happy.
 
RIGHT ⁉️
 
Wrong!!!!!
 
Because the hardest,
most challenging thing,
that we humans face is just this.
 
BE OURSELVES.
 
You are far from alone in your desires.
Or in your sufferings.
 
You are far from alone from kicking around the concept of just f-cking being yourself.
 
💩Sh*t! It sounds pretty appealing huh? to just be you.💩
 
I bet that if I asked you to write down a list of ten things you value the most that,
 
HONESTY
INTEGRITY
AUTHENTICITY
 
would rank among some of the highest on your list.
 
Yet, you cannot seem to LIVE that way yourself.
And you wonder why life keeps bringing you experiences and people that are NOT these things.
 
Hmmmmmm……
 
Well here is a thought for you…🤔
Maybe, just maybe,
Life is showing you what you are lacking yourself,
and what you need to get,
in order to have what you want.🤯
 
⁉️W-H-A-T!!!!!!⁉️
 
Yeppers,
 
Like I said….
you are too f-cking lazy!
 
It really is that simple.
It really is about you just being you,
loving you.
Enjoying you.
 
The truth is that you make it too f-cking hard….
ALL THE TIME!
 
And you do it mainly by over thinking it.
 
So STOP!!! 🛑
Stop the insanity.
 
And just take the path that you were meant to take in the first place…
 
still yourself,
listen,
and act from that place….
 
🔥🔥🔥YES! that place of soul.🔥🔥🔥
 
You have always KNOWN what to do!
It has always been with you.
There is no secret.
 
It is just about being you!!!!!
 
So what is stopping you?
 
Oh RIGHT!!!!
I forgot there is new series on that looks really amazing,
gotta catch that first…..
 
Well,
don’t bitch to me.
 
Cuz’ I will only send you this note baby.
 
Don’t you think it is time?
 
TIME TO SAY YES.
 
Yes to YOU.
 
As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
 
PS💃💃💃
 
You Say You Want The F-ck YES Life Do You?
Well what is stopping you?
I bet it is….
Time.
Money.
Belief you can have it.
Feeling Like You Don’t Know Enough.
Lack of Support.
 
Am I correct?
 
You want it, but there are so many things that get in the way of you having it.
And another year goes by.
 
Another year that you find yourself sinking further into the rut,
into debt and lack of freedom,
another year of wishing,
but not achieving.
 
Or you have decided to step forward onto the path,
you went and got your real estate license.
You signed up for a cool new opportunity that turns you on.
You took on the mission to build your own home based business.
Or maybe it’s not you, but your partner. Your spouse.
You are a team.
And you are going to get ahead of life,
enjoy some travel,
enjoy some extra cash flow,
and get your kids into the school you want.
OR
retire early!!!!
 
Whatever the reason,
it’s hard to find someone who is simply content,
well maybe content is not the right word even.
HAPPY.
 
Happy with their work,
their financial state of being,
their job-family balance,
the time they have,
or
the level of stress they have.
 
So many of us are searching for something more fulfilling these days.
So many of us understand that TIME is our most precious resource and it is very limited and we never know when our time will be up once and for all.
 
So we hold anxiety around it.
We look at our families,
our lives, our health, our bank accounts,
and we stress.
 
Can you say that your’s is all that you want it to be?
 
Or do you want more?
Need more?
 
Have you decided to FINALLY take your life,
your FINANCIAL PICTURE into your own hands?
 
What have you ventured out to do?
 
Entrepreneur you deserve the F-ck YES Life!
But how do you go from where you are,
to where you want,
and it not take you 2 years, 5 years, a decade or more?
How can you avoid some of the major pitfalls that can eat an entrepreneur up?
 
 
As the mama of seven babies, an entrepreneur myself for the last 20 years, who has done my fair share of failing, I can tell you it can be REALLY difficult to know what to do and when to do it, or it can be pretty effing simple.
 
If I had had accessible the mentor’s back in the day that I do now, I would have not spent so many years struggling. But the struggle taught me a ton and has enabled me to be able to share with you what it really takes in today’s social media world to become your own BOSS.
 
And do it BIG!!!!
 
Join me next Sunday November 18th, 2018
 

The Red Carpet Does Not Roll Out at $100k

The red carpet does not roll out on $100k.
I remember the days (it would have been 1996 to be exact) that my husband then and I were working our asses off with a financial service company. Our goal income was to become $100k earners. This was the place everyone wanted to get to. It was the starting point of the lap of luxury.
 
We looked at the six figure earners in the company with awe.
 
Their houses were gorgeous.
They drove the BMW’s, the Mercedes.
Their kids went to the best schools.
They went on multiple trips every year to tropical destinations.
They had freedom in their time.
They wore top quality clothes and accessories.
They were happy.
They had it all going for them.
 
$100k was so impressive.
$100k was where we wanted to be.
There were hardly any worries at this mark.
 
Here we were a young couple with a baby and another one on the way. Working three jobs between us. Our income was less that $24k a year combined.
 
We were on government funded health care.
We were getting WIC for help with food and nutrition.
We relied on the help and support of our families just to get by.
 
But we had a dream.
The dream was $100k.
 
This was 1996.
 
The red carpet does not roll out on $100k anymore.
It did not even back then.
But at least it was a starting point to seeing the red carpet.
At least it showed some material rewards of living a life that was freer than most.
 
Today, 100k is NOTHING.
If you google median household income for the United States you will come up with, $59,000.
 
If you look a bit further you will see that the average person makes between $27k and $41k.
 
You are considered middle class in the USA if you make $42k to $125k.
 
ONLY 20% of Americans make $100k or more.
 
Back in the day, when this number seemed so impressive to me and it was what I strived for but never could achieve, I found myself believing that life would be so much better at 100k than it was where ever I was at.
 
Flash forward to 2018.
Now I am a single woman who makes far more than $100k a year. I run my own business. I raise my children. I travel to tropical destinations. I have shoes that cost more than my summer power bill, my hair cost’s the average mortgage payment.
 
I don’t think twice about spending a few hundred dollars on what seem’s like nothing.
 
The ease I use to spend $5.00 with is now how I spend thousands.
 
Money just flows through me you could say.
My eye is not set on multi six figures, but on multi seven figures.
My income grows expansively each year.
And my time expands with it.
 
In 1996 we worked three jobs to make ends meet plus borrowed from our parents. I spent hours each day stressing over every little dime. I spent hours on the phone doing cold calls, studying and looking for the next thing I needed to do in hopes that it would bring us closer to the 100k mark.
 
None of it did.
Not for lack of effort.
Not for lack of opportunity or company.
Not for lack of understanding the system or product.
 
No the thing I was lacking back then was EASE.
The thing I was lacking back then was BELIEF.
The thing I was lacking back then was a MONEY MINDSET,
the habit of money just flowing effortlessly to me.
 
I spent the next 15+ years dancing around these things.
Ignoring the truth of abundance creation.
 
Then it just happened.
It clicked one day,
and the next month my income went from a $5,000 a month habit to a $13,000 a month habit.
 
I did NOTHING different.
I actually “worked” less.
 
The money just showed up.
Where from?
 
I still don’t really know.
It just does.
Every month, it just shows up.
And increases itself.
 
The more I just RELAX.
The more I tap into saying YES to my SOUL.
The more I FOLLOW MY BLISS.
The more I am just authentically ME.
The more I PLAY.
 
My money habit has changed.
I no longer get up and look at my bank account in dread,
I look with excitement.
I no longer say, ” Mommy cannot afford that.”
I answer from a place of truth of if I think my child needs or should have something, not fearing money.
I no longer say, ” I wish I could….”
Instead I just DO.
 
I no longer put in 45 to 80 hour weeks with my work.
I “work” about 8 to 10 hours at best.
 
I do less in office time for the month than I use to do in a week.
 
INSTEAD, I play.
I laugh.
I ORGASM.
I enjoy life.
I connect.
I FLOW.
I do the things my SOUL calls me to do, and when I do these things, my income GROWS.
 
God SUPPORTS my SOUL’s desires with ABUNDANCE.
I now look at that $100k mark I longed for back in 1996 and laugh.
 
The red carpet most certainly does not roll out at 100k.
It is not even the threshold of luxury.
It might be “getting by” but it is not the be all end all.
 
And if I had to sell my SOUL’s desires to have this 100k I would say F-CK NO!
 
If I had to give up the life that I have created today for it,
I would say F-CK NO!
 
Imagine living a life where your soul’s desires lead you to more abundance?
 
Imagine a life where you are so in alignment to your BLISS that your life expression is ENOUGH to bring you everything that you ever wanted.
 
How would this feel?
Who/what would you be or do?
 
This is what we were born for.
Not to survive the day or week.
Not to live for the weekends and our 2 weeks of holiday.
 
No that is not f-cking living.
We were not born to sacrifice our lives,
our relationships,
our orgasm or joy,
for GETTING BY.

 

We were not born to sacrifice them at all!

 
God is a glorious and abundant SOURCE.
Wanting for your abundance.
 
How can you CLAIM to be a child of God,
and think so little of yourself?
 
I know that it is scary as f-ck to think you may be something GREAT.
 
I know that it takes a massive sh*t storm of COURAGE to go into the land of abundance.
 
I know that you have been told it is not possible.
For a million and one great/not so great reason’s.
 
The truth baby,
the truth,
 
You have a GIFT to give the Mother F-cking World.
 
God is calling you to action,
and the time to act is NOW.
 
All you have to do is SURRENDER to your FLOW.
All you have to do is SAY F-CK YES! To Yourself.
Over
and
Over
and
Over
Again.
 
SO what the f-ck are you waiting for?
 
THIS is your f-cking invitation.
Don’t tell me you can’t because you don’t know where to start.
Because you don’t have the education.
The time.
The money.
The support.
Or any other thing.
 

You were born for THIS SHIT.

 
SO get off your scaredy cat ass and CLAIM YOUR LIFE.
 
 I love you. 
 

And remember,

Stop Existing & Start Living

 
 
PS – Recently I launched my newest online workshop.
It is 10 days of alignment asskickery for anyone who wants to leap into their desired life.
 
Stop F*cking Around has launched and Live training kicks in on July 18th, 2018.
https://www.tantrictransformation.com/stop-f-cking-around/
 
You will not want to miss this event.
 
Here are some of the thing s that people are saying who have sampled the workshop so far.
 
” Wow, it is like magic. I accessed the pre-work and instantly felt the changes in my thinking. So powerful.”
 
“I love your style, you teach and share with such ease, it’s like working with your best friend. I feel like you just get me and where I am at.”
 
“You make it so easy to just embrace life. I have followed you for years and having this opportunity to work with you is so exciting.”
 
Stop F*cking Around – 10 days of Alignment Asskickery!
https://www.tantrictransformation.com/stop-f-cking-around/
 
Grab your spot TODAY and get started on creating that F-ck YES! Life Now.
 
STOP saying you want it, but NEVER take any solid action to GETTING IT.
 
STOP bouncing around with ton’s of great ideas, but no clarity as to what you really desire.
 
STOP making excuses, instead CLAIM your AWESOMNESS.
 
Do you have a calling that is screaming at you?
Do you crave an authentic, blissed out life?
Do you have ton’s of creative energy but no clue what to do with them?
Do you feel like you have tried all these things but are still just standing at the side lines of your life?
 
Well ….
 
The answer is simple.
 
Stop F*cking Around!
https://www.tantrictransformation.com/stop-f-cking-around/
 
SIGN UP NOW.
Start living your Truth.
Start Calling in your blessings.
You deserve it.
https://www.tantrictransformation.com/stop-f-cking-around/

Just Show the Eff Up in Your Life – You Deserve It.

You are not being real with yourself.
Seriously you are not.
You may have some ego pop up in you from reading these words, you may want to argue it and fight it and point to all the ways that you are authentic and truthful, but in reality you are not showing up as your radiant authentic self.

How can I make this bold statement?
Because none of us are.
We are all hiding from aspects of ourselves, we are all in denial of our truth.

We mask ourselves from these flaws, these nasty little monsters that we keep locked away in the closets of our personality and mind. The shadows of our soul’s light.

Yes none of us are authentically us.

I was having a conversation with a man a few weeks ago and the topic of authenticity came up. He asked me why I colored my hair and why I put extensions in my hair. He told me he thought that I was beautiful just the way God created me and he wondered why I would not just authentically be me the way God intended at my birth.

I attempted to explain to him that I did these things with my hair because I wanted to. It was not for anyone but myself and it was all about how they made me feel.

His response was one based in his care for me and his adoration for who I am and what I share that helps him understand his life and relationships with more clarity and ease. But the energy that it met me with felt like control.

The more I found myself explaining my choices, the more I felt like I was dealing with my father and was somehow in a position of explaining myself and getting his permission. Which is sheer craziness for this particular relationship for sure, however the energy that was there was still the same. And it was met by my frustration of having to explain when I find no need to explain myself.

But here I was EXPLAINING.

I do what I do, for me not anyone else.
It is that simple.
Yet here I was in this conversation. This man’s big brown eyes looking at me like a curious little boy with a desire for me to know that I did not need to do anything in his eyes to be better. I was perfect as I was.

He took my actions of coloring my hair and having extensions as a lack of authenticity.

Asking me, ” How can you advocate authenticity so much but then not be the you that God created? Why do you have to change yourself?”

The reality is that I am being very authentic in my actions of coloring my hair, having fuller, longer hair with my extensions, by decorating my body with the tattoo’s, the perfumes, the makeup or lack of makeup that I choose. I put on the clothes that I feel best in each day, whatever that may be. I do not dress because of some dress code or how I believe I want people to perceive me, I dress how I desire based on my mood in the moment. I make choices for my body and how I choose to show up physically in the world based not on what someone is telling me or how I will be perceived but on who I am in that day.

Some days I feel like a stay at home mom who just wants to stay in her PJ’s and not care about her hair or looks.

Some days I feel like a sultry seductress who wants to wear no panties, a skirt with a slit up to my mid thigh and a revealing top.

Some days I feel like an outdoor adventurer and grab my jeans and a tee shirt and hiking shoes.

Some days I feel like I want to put on my professional hat and be very of the mind and structures so I put on more traditional business clothes.

Then there are the days where I look like a total biker bitch.
The days where I could give Princess Diana (bless her soul) a run for her money on beautiful dresses.

No matter what the day, I guarantee I am showing up as me in the moment.

You may be shaking your head in agreeance right now, or wonder why the eff I am even writing about this.

The message of this brief share is to say that none of us are 100% authentic.
All we can ever do is try and show up as authentic as we can in any given moment.
And our hair, clothes, makeup or anything else that we choose to add to our physical being is not a masking of our truth.
There are plenty of us who use these things to hide from ourselves or choose what we do with our physical beings based on what society, work, family say we should do, but when you get right down to it. If you feel deep into yourself, you will see that the way you choose to express yourself is yours and only yours.

The more in alignment you are to who you truly are,
the less likely you are to make decisions based on anyone other than yourself.

There is never a need to explain who you are or why you are choosing what you are choosing.

You do you.
The ONLY thing you ever need to realize is that the expression of you that you let be seen needs to come from your soul, not your fear of others.

True authenticity is about your heart and soul.
It is about alignment and revealing just this.

The most outwardly made up person, with plastic surgery, pounds of makeup, expensive clothes, the most expensive car and a fancy resume can be one of the most authentic people you will ever know if they are expressing their soul’s creativity for the growth and connection to their soul.

Or they can be one of the most masked people you will ever meet if they are only trying to look a certain way and be a certain way because they don’t believe they are enough or that this is the only way they will ever get love or connection.

Either can be true.

I CHOOSE me. 
I CHOOSE honoring my soul’s creative flow in life.
I CHOOSE showing up without apology for who I am every day.
I CHOOSE self love, which means doing what feel’s good for me.

Authentically loving myself and doing what turns me on.
Can you say the same?

As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living

PS – Today is the launch of my newest online workshop. 
It is 10 days of asskickery for anyone who wants to leap into their desired life.

Stop F*cking Around launches today and Live training kicks in on July 18th, 2018.
https://www.tantrictransformation.com/stop-f-cking-around/

You will not want to miss this event.

Here are some of the thing s that people are saying who have sampled the workshop so far.

” Wow, it is like magic. I accessed the pre-work and instantly felt the changes in my thinking. So powerful.”

“I love your style, you teach and share with such ease, it’s like working with your best friend. I feel like you just get me and where I am at.”

“You make it so easy to just embrace life. I have followed you for years and having this opportunity to work with you is so exciting.”

Stop F*cking Around – 10 days of Alignment Asskickery!
https://www.tantrictransformation.com/stop-f-cking-around/

Grab your spot TODAY and get started on creating that F-ck YES! Life Now.

STOP saying you want it, but NEVER take any solid action to GETTING IT.

STOP bouncing around with ton’s of great ideas, but no clarity as to what you really desire.

STOP making excuses, instead CLAIM your AWESOMNESS.

Do you have a calling that is screaming at you?
Do you crave an authentic, blissed out life?
Do you have ton’s of creative energy but no clue what to do with them?
Do you feel like you have tried all these things but are still just standing at the side lines of your life?

Well ….

The answer is simple.

Stop F*cking Around!
https://www.tantrictransformation.com/stop-f-cking-around/

SIGN UP NOW.
Start living your Truth.
Start Calling in your blessings.
You deserve it.
https://www.tantrictransformation.com/stop-f-cking-around/

Getting Naked With Myself.

You know you f-cking want it!

So why the hell don’t you take it?

 
Why the f-ck do you deny yourself it?
This is frank Friday folks and I am going to be VERY frank with you about a few things from love, sex, money, joy, blessing to just simply getting into alignment.
 
I work with beautiful people every day, they all have BIG dreams. BIG goals and crave a BIG life that is not just about survival but a life that they can feel.
 
A Life that they can enjoy.
That embraces them.
That is complex.
But comes with ease.
 
They have this idea, this concept that they were born for more.
They have this itch inside their soul that say’s that God put them here not to pay bills but to GIVE, to SHARE and to RECEIVE.
 
They have this little voice in them screaming that they are worthy if they will only allow themselves to be.
 
They have a desire, that will not be tamed.
It is a desire to be more.
To have more.
To share more.
It is a desire to become their purpose.
 
My main message of coaching to them and to you, if this at all sounds like you…
 
In order to have any of this. You MUST without a shadow of a doubt KNOW YOURSELF.
 
It is never about the HOW.
It is never about someone else needing to do something for you or change.
It is never about a niche.
It is never about the right time.
It is never about skills, or certificates.
Degree’s have nothing to do with it.
Showing up the way society is comfortable with you, has only the flip reaction for it.
Doing things the way your parents, friends or spouse want you to do/be/have -WILL NEVER get you any of it.
 
F-CK NO!!!!!!!
The ONLY, and I repeat only way you can have the F-ck YES! Life that you crave.
The only way you can have the orgasmic relationship that you want.
The only way you can have the deep connections that you desire.
The health and well-being that you want.
The overflowing abundance that you desire.
 
Is to effing know thy self.
 
Yes, this is the answer to your dreams.
When you know yourself, you are in alignment to your soul. Therefore you are in alignment to God. You open the channels for God to work through you. Suddenly your life is magical and full of blessings.
 
Luck of the Irish has nothing on you.
 
This is how you command down your blessings.
This is how you dance through life.
This is where you tap into your joy, your bliss and open to receive it.
 
You may say, “Hey, Kendal, I get it. I know myself really well. I feel totally in alignment to who I am. I just don’t understand why things are not connecting the way I want. ”
 
And my response to you is this,
If it is not connecting then you are not in alignment.
You may feel like you are in alignment, and you may very well be, here and there, but you are not maintaining it. Therefore you are wobbling and much like wobbling on a tight rope, you will fall.
 
This fall will feel like you have fallen out of favor with God. Out of blessing. You may even look for reasons as to what you did to deserve it. What sin did you commit.
 
The reality in most cases is that you are not guilty of any sin other than doubting yourself, doubting your alignment, getting caught in the how to’s and where is it coming from and there fore doubting God.
 
The doubt made you fall.
It separated you from your truth.
It made you question who you are and in that, you stopped knowing yourself.
You stopped trusting yourself.
 
So do you really know yourself?
Do you?
 
You may claim you do.
But it is time to get real.
Really f-cking REAL.
 
With the only person that matters.
YOU.
 
So what do you want?
What do you crave?
What do you desire?
 
Are you a match for it?
Are you sure?
Have you gotten into alignment?
 
Yes???????
 

Then where the F-CK is it?

Show it to me.

 
In the last 4 days I created $8,000 extra income out of no where. It just came in.
 
Do you know how this happened for me and why I am certain that more will continue to stream in without me ever trying to figure out the effing how?
 
Because I feel NO PRESSURE around it.
Matter a fact I hardly apply attention to it.
It just is.
 
SIMPLY put.
How can it not be there, when my expectation, my certainty say’s that it just is. It is just me.
Part of me.
Part of my flow.
I don’t need to question it.
If I focus to much on why or how it came about, then I am presenting the energy, the emotion and thought of not having it.
 
I am stepping out of alignment.
I am stepping away from myself, and therefore away from God.
 
I am stepping out of favor then.
Just me.
No one else.
 
And with that step I will feel the separation.
The pain.
The fear.
The depression.
The anger.
The doubt.
The anxiety.
 
That is where all those emotions come from.
Separation.
 
That is it.
 
So how do you create a life of Mother F-cking Juicy as Sh*t Abundance?
 
You just know yourself.
And KNOW you are worth it and all that you want and desire is already here with you.
 
That is it.
That is the BIG Secret.
 
So tap into you B-A-B-Y!
You deserve it.
You are it.
 
Get greedy.
And command that sh*t in.
 
If you don’t then who will?
What are you accepting in your life?
 
 

And as always,

Stop Existing & Start Living

Join Kendal TODAY for a F*ck Yes Life experience. Limited time access to 1:1 coaching and online coaching programs to help you master your FREEDOM based life NOW.

Sick As Shit, But NOT Accepting This.

I most likely “should” not be doing this today, after all I am sick.
I am recovering from this nasty as f*ck cold that took over my voice, my chest, my head, my sinuses. Keeping me awake hours all night and just not letting me sleep like a hungry lover who never is fulfilled.

I most likely “should” just cancel my day and F-ck it!
I most likely “should” go to the doctor and get some med’s to help me bust through this shit quicker.

Yeppers.
That is what I most likely “SHOULD” do.

But that is NOT what leaders do.
That is not what high vibe peep’s do.
That is not what those of us who have dreams do.

No.
It sure is f*uck not.

I might be sick.
I certainly need to take some TLC time.
I most defiantly need rest and a few good nights sleep.
But incorporating a practice of “shoulding on myself?”
I am F-CK NO to that one.

That will not heal me quicker or help me reach my goals.
It will not bring my being to a higher VIBE.

It will dilute me.
It will suck me dry from the false judgement,
the ego,
the fear,
the resistance of being all of me.

It will prevent me from SHINING my Mother F-cking Light as strong as I WANT to.

The issue is NOT in the things that I say I “should” do or “should not” do.

The issue is the SHOULD.

The statement of should say’s that I am basing…
My life,
My health,
My beliefs,
My goals,
My style,
My attitude,
My sex,
My money,
My LIGHT

on what I BELIEVE the world thinks I should do or should not do/be/have.

It is not based on WHO I AM, but on who I think society will accept the most.

There is the issue.

You know this issue, don’t you?
I bet you know it intimately even.

Maybe to intimately to acknowledge even,
keeping this relationship with “SHOULD” in the hiding as much as you can.
Acting as though you are removed from it,
Like you divorced it.
You don’t have that issue any longer.
That was the old you.

The new you is…

ENLIGHTENED.

Right?

Hahahahahahahahah…..
Okay sure.

I will let you sit there with that.
And I will sit here with mine.
And we can just sit in silence of our hiding our truth for just a second longer.

But here is the issue in that….

I can ONLY sit here a second with it.
I simply don’t have the time to give my life to all the “SHOULD’S and SHOULD NOT’S”

I simply KNOW with CERTAINTY that they will NEVER provide me with anything that I want.

They will only steal my breath.
They will only take my dreams and bury them in the waste land of a life that COULD HAVE BEEN.

They will only fill my soul with REGRET.

No.

I sure as F-CK DO NOT have more than a second of my time to sit here with you, in the silence of not chasing my dreams.

I know with CERTAINTY that God has my back.
I know with CERTAINTY that anything I truly put my mind, heart and attention to will manifest like f-cking magick for me.

I know with CERTAINTY that you can have this too.

But FIRST.
First you have to let go of your shoulding nature.

First you have to say goodbye to it,
let yourself cry your tears of mourning of letting go of all that holds you back,
(she coughs)
Yes your hold backs, those things that feel so f-cking safe and comfortable.

I KNOW you don’t want to admit it.
I KNOW you want to cringe at the realization of it.
I KNOW that you find yourself holding your breath,
feeling guilt or shame even around it,
But it is F-CKING TRUE.

Isn’t it?

Imagine if you just FINALLY accepted that you were limitless.
Imagine if you just FINALLY decided to get selfish.
Imagine if you just FINALLY chose to say YES,
Yes to YOU.

Who would you be?
What would you have?
Where would you go?
What would you do?

Imagine if you just stopped shoulding on yourself.
What would it FEEL like with out the should in your life?

Seriously,
I am the one who is SICK AS F-CK here…
I am the one that “should” be crying in my yogurt about how crappy I feel,
How tired I am,
How shitty my body feels today,
How much I still have to do and have no energy for.

F-CK THAT!
You won’t catch me doing that.

Instead,
Instead you will see me leaning in to the discomfort of
SAYING YES….

YES, to the most important person in this Mother F-cking world.

YES to ME.

Saying YES
to self care,
telling myself that I am worthy,
that I am lovable,
that I am unf-cking stoppable,
that I am powerful,
beautiful,
magnetic
and healthy.

Sh*t Ain’t Going To Get Me Down.
I will step past that “Should Pile” and I will put on my shoes,
eat my yogurt and strawberries,
drink my coffee and water,
write out my commandments of manifestation,
BREATHE in Life.
And SHINE.

Now the ONLY Question of the day that remains,
Is what will you do with your “should pile?”

STOP Stepping in it!
That is what I highly recommend.

And As Always, 
Stop Existing & Start Living

Join Kendal TODAY for a F*ck Yes Life experience. Limited time access to 1:1 coaching and online coaching programs to help you master your FREEDOM based life NOW.

Mother F*cker Messed Up My Orgasm.

 
I sit here this morning not wanting to open up my text thread with my ex.
The negativity,
the control,
the anger that comes from it,
and that I feel inside just at reading the last words on the thread.
 
“Really?”
 
I already know the tone.
The comments and commands.
I feel disgust at this thread.
 
Late last night I saw his final words,
they hit me like lead in my gut,
Sorrow,
Distrust,
Bitterness,
Anger.
 
It is all here.
Stepping away from an enviroment,
a relationship for a few weeks or months
 

“Really”

 
does show you a person’s truth.
While in the relationship we make excuses,
get caught up in the day to day,
and simply just don’t want change.
We don’t want to have a relationship fail.
We want to make it work.
We want to be accepted, loved and connected.
Even at the cost of our well-being,
Our happiness,
Joy,
Health and freedom.
 
SO we ignore,
hide, ‘cover that shit up and act like it is not there.
 
Truth never stays hidden forever though.
A person’s true color’s ALWAYS come out.
And in my saga, the color’s are not so pretty in this relationship.
 
The truth of the reality is that I masked from myself my partners need to control and dominate. I knew he was an alpha personality walking in, and loved that about him. His strength and ability to hold boundaries was attractive. His assertiveness and masculine power was what I needed and desired. I needed the security of this. I needed the foundation of this. I also loved his calm, cool, collected stance. I loved his seemingly open mindedness and playfulness. He offered what I needed in the moment.
 
It was a season.
There was a reason.
 
Now those were gone.
Now I am left with the flip side.
The control freak, the aggressor, the one who when he does not get his way acts like a 3 year old and retracts himself, his love and says, ” I hate you.” Takes his ball and goes home.
 
Now I am left with his need to try and control me through our children. I wonder if he even notices it, if he is aware of his pattern’s, his actions or if he is just playing the role that is comfortable to him and feel’s safe.
 
Now I am left with the residue of his energy as it wafts through the text message, the facetime, the phone calls and emails.
 
Now I am left with him just ignoring anything he does not want to discuss because of the discomfort and his knowing that it will be emotional and I will speak my truth and he can do nothing to stop it.
 
Now I am left with him proving what his priorities are.
His bottom line is focused on his bank account and not on relationship.
His priority is to pretend that none of his actions had anything to do with anything.
His priority is to run and hide behind his masks, not seeing that he is turning into his worst nightmare. The people he always claimed he did not want to be like he is now mimicking them. He is now becoming the one’s that have since passed and he is honoring the patterns that they taught him as a little boy. He is now honoring a closed heart, a barren soul, a disconnected life.
 
In his desire to control, he does nothing more than share his rage and hatred. His fear.
 

But none of this is reason for him to steal my orgasm.

 
No, that is on me.
 
But I want to cast blame onto him.
I want to point the finger and say he did this to me.
 
Yes, this morning I sit here not wanting to open this thread of text messages between us because I feel all of it.
 
Last night, I did not open it in hopes to avoid it.
I wanted to avoid the negativity of his control.
I wanted to avoid looking at him on facetime with our nightly call for our kids.
I wanted to just not feel him for just one night, one day.
I wanted the freedom that flickers through my days.
I wanted to breathe.
 
But that last statement attached itself to me,
the thread just lingered and my ego ran and played with it.
 

“Really?”

He was inquiring why I had not answered I am sure,
he was frustrated that in his grand attempt to contact everyone in my home to get me to contact him had not worked,
he was upset that he could not control the situation and that I had made a stance to just say no.
 
Our children had not asked to speak to him so I felt no guilt in not speaking tonight.
 
We were busy having fun, connecting and laughing.
We were snuggling.
So why wreck a good moment.
A good memory for his desire to control?
 
Yes, this is the question of the morning.
Why allow him to steal it?
I held firm for my children.
For that moment.
But then I allowed that word, that thread to infiltrate my soul.
I allowed it to poke at me.
And I allowed it to steal the depth of orgasm that I was offered in the night hours with my lover.
 
I pushed myself to open,
I felt pain from doing this.
I shut myself in fear,
fear I would reveal to much.
I got captured by that damn text thread,
over and over again.
 
Into my head,
out of my body.
Away from my deep orgasm.
Keeping it surface.
All the while desiring what I had just tasted 24 hours before.
 

That mother f*cker messed up my orgasm.

F-*-C-K!!!!!!

 
I allowed him to.
Just like I allowed him to control to much of my life in our relationship. Just like I allowed him the power to act the way he did. Just like I allowed myself to stay,
to stay in the enviroment that was not conducive to my purpose,
my heart, my life.
 
YES
 
That mother f*cker messed up my orgasm.
But I made the choice to not release,
to breathe in.
To hold him and his energy
instead of leaning in to my lovers thrusts of passion,
my lovers presence,
my bliss.
 
He only messed it up because I allowed it.
And this morning, I sit here witnessing my ego, my pain, my rage, my holding.
 
Here I sit with my body breaking down.
My body screaming at me, “STOP! – Let that shit go!”
 
Here I sit, witnessing that he not only physically hurt me,
controlled me in ways that I was not aware of,
hid his truth from me,
Held anger toward me and lied to my face about it,
He not only did not love me and may have never,
but he continued to punch me in the heart.
He was willing to try and dominate my life,
the children’s life,
through textbook tactics of an abuser.
 
It is shocking to me.
It is on going.
It is healing to see things from this vantage point.
 

That mother f*cker messed up my orgasm.

And I am in gratitude for it.

 
Thank you Mother F*cker for being you and showing me my strength.
Thank you Mother F*cker for showing who you really are so that I could claim whom I am more.
Thank you Mother F*cker for the season, the reason and the blessings that we shared.
Thank you Mother F*cker for coming into my life and being EXACTLY what I needed.
 
With out you, I would not be me.
Empowered.
Guided.
Desiring more.
Certain.
 
Thank you for supporting my determination and drive.
Thank you for your disconnect to your emotions and heart, and showing what that does to a human, to a relationship, to a life and making me aware of where I meet you there and that…
 
I CHOOSE.
I choose to STOP meeting you there.
I choose instead to open up my heart.
To feel my emotions.
To forgive.
To heal.
To laugh.
To connect.
 

I choose to LIVE.

Unbound, free and on purpose.

 
Cut loose from the chains that you tried to hold me with.
Cut loose from the chains that I held myself with.
Cut loose from the fear.
 
YES
I choose.
I choose to…
 

Stop Existing & Start Living

Join Kendal TODAY for a F*ck Yes Life experience. Limited time access to 1:1 coaching and online coaching programs to help you master your FREEDOM based life NOW.

Shaky Knee’s & Stairs

Shaky Knee’s and Stairs.

These two things do not get along well.
And yest they are a match made in heaven.

Looking down from the second floor stairs,
Looking at that first step,
feeling my knee’s tremble at the core.
The energy pulsing from my core.
The cool night breeze, brushing up against my cheek as I took a deep breath in.
My lover behind me.

My knee’s.
My knee’s, shaking from the hours upon hours of pleasure.
Quivering from the core.
My core.

There is this fullness,
This feeling of alignment,
yet fear still resides here.
I can feel it being shaken loose.

That first step,
seeming so far away.
The uncertain feeling of can I make it?
The knowing that it is one of many to follow.

I am tired.
I am so tired.
I am turned on .
So turned on.
I want more.
So much more.

But FIRST, 
that step.

That first step.
Why is it so hard to land that first step.
To find the courage to JUST TAKE IT.

It’s fear.
It’s uncertainty.
It’s lack of faith.
It’s lack of belief in my worthiness.

and

YET, I KNOW that I can land it.
There is this knowing that is deeper than the fear.

This knowing that wants to be known.
It wants to be REMEMBERED.

It is there begging for my attention.
Begging for me to STOP existing in the shadows of what I can be.

It is that quiet voice that is getting loud as the day’s pass.
Saying, “YES YOU CAN.”

But these knee’s…
These shaky knee’s.

They tremble at all that could happen.
They resist the wonders that could be born from the pleasure of saying YES to myself.
They resist the DESIRE that wants to JUST LET GO.
They tremble in fear that something may happen to this me that I know, as the me that I am to be EMERGES.

You would think that hours of pleasure would grant me the confidence to just land the step.
You would think that hours of embracing what I wanted, would give me the faith that I could take the step and KNOW I have it.
You would think that the surrender to success, the depth of orgasmic bliss that I said YES to would show me that this world is for the taking, it is for the embracing and it supports our TRUTH when we lean in, let go and get in flow.

But every moment, I have come to learn is a new moment.
And every moment carries hope and doubt.

It is up to me in this moment to DECIDE, 
To CLAIM what I want to do with it.

It is up to me, and only me to TAKE THE STEP.

Will I let these shaky knee’s lock me up in fear?
Or will I let these shaky knee’s rattle out that fear as I step forward in FAITH?

Yes there are many steps before me.
There is risk,
But my lover is behind me.
His love carries me.

The step’s are suddenly not so steep.
The breeze, it brushes up against my cheek like a lover itself whispering his intentions in my ear.
The night sky, filled with his glory.
Like a lover filling me with his essence in climax.
There is a owl in the distance,
I hear it’s call of the night.
As if to say, “Listen to your soul, my child.”

And so I shall!
I shall LISTEN.
I shall TAKE THE STEP.
In FAITH.
In CERTAINTY.

Here is my courage.
Here is my guidance.
Here, here in this moment of leaving my lovers embrace, I open to true surrender. True guidance.
My angels are around me.

It is TIME.

Step.
Step.
Step.

Ahhhhhhhh…….
The feeling of saying YES, to one’s truth.
It is FREEDOM.

It is bliss.
It is the F*ck YES! Life.

Will you say YES?

And remember, 
Stop Existing & Start Living

Join Kendal TODAY for a F*ck Yes Life experience. Limited time access to 1:1 coaching and online coaching programs to help you master your FREEDOM based life NOW.