LIVING FOR SELF.

LIVING FOR SELF.

One of the hardest lessons I keep learning in this lifetime is just this.

The constant reminder that we are truly not here for anyone’s else’s happiness but our own.

Its a difficult lesson,
Because we are trained from our birth forward that putting others feelings, well being and happiness “should” always come before our own.

However the reality is not so.
You will never find happiness or fulfillment in putting yourself on the back burner of your own life.

We are all here for the same reason,
To expand and thrive.
Through our wanting for more in our life experiences we expand the universe.
It is through our conscious creation and desire that life manifests and we create everything that is, that was and ever will be.

We grow this desire and our wanting by experience of all that we do not want for,
Such as lack in any subject area that we want abundance in.

But for us to have the life that we are desiring we MUST become the person who can take hold of it. Meaning WE have to grow ourselves.
We have to become our truest self and get into alignment with out desires.

As vibrational beings this means that we HAVE TOO PUT OUR HAPPINESS FIRST.

No more playing around and taking responsibility for everyone else’s joy while we sit in toxity of giving our last drop of us to this other who at the end of the day cannot even fully gain happiness through our exhaustion.

Sure we can offset anothers sadness or life issues to a degree,
But cannot eternally fix anyone else’s shit.
We cannot actually make anyone else happy for the long haul.

Happiness,
Just like gratitude, love and the feeling of abundance is an inside job. All we can do is assist someone feeling those things in the short term, but if they do not find it within and know thier own worthiness then at the slighted retraction of our energy,
They will fall the fuck apart.

This is how you know that someone has become dependent on your energy.
Not realizing it often when we are in this state of dependence we are actually being what is known as an energy vampire,
One you must feed on the kindness,
The love, the empathy, and even the sadness or anger of another to keep themselves stable in life.

Those who are not acting from thier authentic selves, who are out of alignment with God thus thier own soul and who do not know themselves, love themselves, often are guilty consciously and subconsciously of doing this.

And they can make those around them feel guilty for thier life misery. They will play and toil with others emotions, acting the victim and helpless lost soul just to get thier feeding.

But this is where we all must realize that NONE OF US are here to save anyone else.

And we cannot even help them save themselves if we do not care for self first.

Its just like the speech we have all heard on the airplane at take off about the oxygen masks.

“Put it on yourself first before helping anyone else, including your child.”

This is because you are of zero help if you can’t breathe, if you are passed out or worse dead.

And the same applies to our day to day life and relationships.

You are of zero use if you exhaust yourself to the point of fatigue, disease and illness, depression all under the belief structure that you need to put every other asshole on this planet in front of self.

You MUST LIVE FOR SELF.
You must get selfish and love yourself enough to say no to everyone,
Even when,
Especially when they are playing on your emotions and hoping you will feed them.

Fuck them.
They need to learn how to love themselves enough to align the fuck up to source and not need your beautiful ass anymore.

They need to take fucking responsibility for thier own lives and energy.
For thier emotions.

And stop handing over the reigns to each and every Joe that passes by.

And you my dear,
You need to just do the same.

Its time to take back your power.
Take back your life.
Take back your energy and LOVE YOU.

Because baby you are so worthy of being in alignment and feeling fucking awesome.

You are worthy of living the life that you desire.
You are worthy of happiness, love and abundance.
Well being and satisfaction of who you are.

But you will never get any of this as long as you keep sacrificing your energy for all the vampires that you love.

Stop enabling them,
And start being you.

With all my love on this transitional day.

Stop Existing & Start Living
Coaching for Grown A*s Believers

Want to know how to say FUCK YES TO YOU…
October Asskickery is happening.
Global 1:1 Coaching opportunities to take back your power today.

Reach out for deets.

Photo credit

DandelionImages

 

Random Naked Thoughts from the Key’s.

Today I visited Hemingway’s home here in Key West.
I love Hemingway’s work.
And after listening to the tour guide share tidbits from Hemingway’s history,
I can now understand why I love his writings.
The statement that rang so true and beared power with it was,
“He liked to write from experience. Hemingway was a man who craved adventure and went to find it. His stories come from those experiences.”
As I work with people,
and I move through my own life and just witness,
What I see often is the reverse of this for so many people.
Perhaps you know what I speak of.
So many people choose to not live.
Choose to not be part of THEIR own life in many ways.
Choose to not experience.
However, instead live their lives vicariously from a place separated from life.
They live watching others.
And they sit in judgment over these people that they sit and watch.
I have been around sports fans all my life,
my ex-husband is a HUMONGOUS football fan.
It’s hard to communicate with him during football season,
because NOTHING matters more than who is on the field and the decisions that they are making.
I have often wondered watching him,
sit in the living room or at a bar,
drinking, rooting, cussing and getting really upset at times over a penalty or a poor play,
what his fascination is in watching someone else play the game.
I mean I understand that they are talented.
I get that there is a world watching with him, and there may be money on the line,
but why just watch.
If you love the game so damn much,
Why won’t you go throw the ball with your kid?
Why don’t you want to play it yourself,
push your own edges,
make your own calls,
and feel the adrenaline of winning or losing.
Why just kick back and WATCH?
This Is not being an active participant in the thing you have so much passion and love for.
It would be like ( and I know that some actually choose this – no shame in it, you do you.) ….
It would be like you getting married to someone that you simply adore, love with everything but then have someone else step in and do the actual act of relationship for you.
So they have sex with your partner and you just watch,
never experience,
they raise your children,
you just watch never state your feelings about parenting and what is right and good or not,
they buy your house and choose the furniture,
they choose how the relationship with your husband/wife goes.
You just watch.
Never participate.
Never experience.
You get to witness it all,
but you never engage.
And then you say,
” I love being married. My partner is the best thing that’s ever happened to me. We are best friends. My kids are amazing. The sex is hot AF.”
Seriously?
Well we in truth actually do this to degrees.
We hire nannies.
We hire interior decorators.
We hire teachers.
We hire cleaners.
We may even activate a swingers lifestyle because we cannot fulfill in some ways and just request that our partner do everything in front of us,
so we can watch.
So we can see but not engage.
As we do with all the other areas.
And what are we doing in truth?
Not that any of the things that I shared above are bad,
so please don’t think I am saying that they are….
but that if we are doing these things to AVOID,
or to make it where we do not have to be responsible for…
then perhaps we need to question our WHY.
Perhaps it is time for us to ask ourselves,
Why are we so eager and comfortable to step out of our own life experiences?
What are we avoiding?
What are we shutting ourselves down for?
Fear.
Fear that we may get it wrong.
Fear that we could get hurt.
Fear that we may harm someone.
Fear that we may love and lose.
Fear of not being worthy of it.
SO much fear in living is what so many have,
and despite how much money is in the bank,
how big the house is,
how many cool cars you own,
you find yourself fearing connection and love.
The things that you crave so deeply for.
And you crave play and adventure.
You crave the feeling,
the true feeling of life moving through you in all it’s magical ways,
but you deny it daily.
You turn your back to it in the small things,
like football.
and you think nothing of it.
That is just a game,
everyone is watching it.
If you are a fan,
then THIS is what fans do.
They live through the players who are out on the court and playing…
LIVING.
And that is why the palyers get paid the BIG BUCKS.
So they can live.
Because you won’t.
Because you are f-cking terrified of living,
so you buy a jersey,
you upgrade your TV accounts to catch every game,
you go to the games and you get all the best tickets so that you can breathe it all in.
But when when it comes to you living your life,
and speaking from the space of actually experiencing life,
like Hemingway did…
well that is not for you.
That is for anyone but you.
And you look at those who have the balls to do it and you hunger to feel what they feel.
You love their sharing,
you love-hate that they are turned on to life and thriving,
but you still repeatedly say no to your dreams,
your desires,
your life that is asking you to live it.
And why?
Fear.
SO today as I bounce around Key West,
as I plan out the rest on my days here,
and all the really cool shit I have done and will continue to do,
as I look forward to my next adventure week after next and then again in two weeks and so on,
I sit back for a second in this moment and I feel compassion for you.
I feel a desire to impress on you that this is your life,
stop watching everyone else live why you sit back and make excuses as to why you cannot.
But what do I know right?
Life is not about you loving it and living,
life so I hear is about you listening to how to remain in a box and staying safe… HA! If that is a thing even. It is about you being responsible, because I guess if you are thriving that you are not responsible….
Not my experience.
But what some might say.
Share your thoughts if you dare.
Just mine as I sit here nude on my deck writing during an island thunder storm.
As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
Ready to start saying yes? Ready to activate your life and thrive? I sure wish you would say yes,
it would be cool to hang with you.
to share with you.
To walk this magical journey with you.
But the first step is the step of saying F-ck Fear!
Reach out to me if you dare to say yes to your dreams and want to know how you can accomplish them.

Get The F-ck Out Of The Way!

GET THE F-CK OUT OF THE WAY!

Who’s way?

Your way.

Damn straight baby,

You are in your way.

And you have been blocking yourself from hearing the messages of the universe,

For years now.

It’s time you stop accepting so little for your life.

This world needs you to get ignited in your power.

You see by sitting back and squelching your light, your wisdom, your heart,

You are denying all those whose life you could positively impact your gift.

By keeping yourself locked up,

For the awesome reason of fear,

Or some wound you endured back then,

You are limiting your touch on this world.

The people in your life that you claim to love,

That you say are the reasons that you are holding back for,

Well guess what,

You are not loving them more or doing them any favors by not being 100% you in your radiant power.

No.

In truth you are hindering them.

You are not offering them their best life.

And certainly are not thriving.

You say you are a teacher,

A preacher,

Enlightened,

A crusader,

A parent,

A friend,

A lover….

Well time to grow a pair, love.

Time to stand the f-ck up and open your ears to the guidance that is all around.

God is reaching out to you.

The angels are screaming for you to hear them.

Your SOUL is churning inside.

And yet there you sit.

Stubborn in your fear and pain.

Where will it ever take you baby?

Where will you end up?

Feel that pit in your stomach as you embrace the reality that you only have this present moment to decide who you are and what you want for.

You get to choose your next step.

You get to open the door to the rest of your life.

You get to point yourself in the direction that makes you feel good.

Did you read that?

The direction that makes you feel good.

Yeah.

And what’s going to feel good?

Staying in the same pattern that you have been in all these years,

Or getting out of your own way?

If you choose option A,

Please stop reading now. I am not talking to you in this message.

If you chose option B,

Well then start stepping baby.

I know how terrifying it can feel to finally say yes to yourself.

I know its shaky ground to step forward and have faith that you can do it.

That breaking free you won’t find yourself being too much or not enough.

I get it that change can feel challenging.

But the reality is this….

If you truly want to be that ignited powerhouse that you are.

Thriving in life, love, health and wealth…

Well you HAVE GOT TO MAKE WHAT IS FAMILIAR UNFAMILIAR.

There ain’t no other way around it.

You know what you have been getting with what you have been choosing so far.

So what do you say love?

Are you ready to not just crack open the door,

But blow it the f-ck off its hinges and say yes.

Yes to your life of abundance.

Yes to happiness.

Yes to feeling good.

Yes to turning your attention to what feels good.

Yes to your soul.

I sure hope so.

‘Cuz you deserve it.

But in truth….

Only a few actually blow the door off its hinges.

Most crack it a bit and then let their fear creep back in and they slam the door shut tighter than before. They get nervous with walking a new path in life.

But this ain’t you, right?

Right.

So let’s do this.

Let’s do it now.

Time to say F-CK YES!!!

And remember,

Stop Existing & Start Living

“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers “

Message me for deets on steps to saying yes to your power today.

One World Topic – Bringing Awareness Home

Photo Credit NBC12.com

SO, WHAT HAS PROTESTING ACCOMPLISHED??

Within 10 days of sustained protests:
👉🏾 Minneapolis bans use of choke holds.

👉🏾Charges are upgraded against Officer Chauvin, and his accomplices are arrested and charged.

👉🏾Dallas adopts a “duty to intervene” rule that requires officers to stop other cops who are engaging in inappropriate use of force.

👉🏾New Jersey’s attorney general said the state will update its use-of-force guidelines for the first time in two decades.

👉🏾In Maryland, a bipartisan work group of state lawmakers announced a police reform work group.

👉🏾Los Angeles City Council introduces motion to reduce LAPD’s $1.8 billion operating budget.

👉🏾MBTA in Boston agrees to stop using public buses to transport police officers to protests.

👉🏾Police brutality captured on cameras leads to near-immediate suspensions and firings of officers in several cities (e.g., Buffalo, Ft. Lauderdale).

👉🏾Monuments celebrating confederates are removed in cities in Virginia, Alabama, and other states.

👉🏾Street in front of the White House is renamed “Black Lives Matter Plaza.”
Military forces begin to withdraw from D.C.

Then, there’s all the other stuff that’s hard to measure:

💓The really difficult public and private conversations that are happening about race and privilege.

💓The realizations some white people are coming to about racism and the role of policing in this country.

💓The self-reflection.

💓The internal battles exploding within organizations over issues that have been simmering or ignored for a long time. Some organizations will end as a result, others will be forever changed or replaced with something stronger and fairer.

Globally:

🌎 Protests against racial inequality sparked by the police killing of George Floyd are taking place all over the world.

🌎 Rallies and memorials have been held in cities across Europe, as well as in Mexico, Canada, Brazil, Australia, and New Zealand.

🌎 As the US contends with its second week of protests, issues of racism, police brutality, and oppression have been brought to light across the globe.

🌎 People all over the world understand that their own fights for human rights, for equality and fairness, will become so much more difficult to win if we are going to lose America as the place where ‘I have a dream’ is a real and universal political program,” Wolfgang Ischinger, a former German ambassador to the US, told the New Yorker.

🌎 In France, protesters marched holding signs that said “I can’t breathe” to signify both the words of Floyd, and the last words of Adama Traoré, a 24-year-old black man who was subdued by police officers and gasped the sentence before he died outside Paris in 2016.

🌎 Cities across Europe have come together after the death of George Floyd:

✊🏽 In Amsterdam, an estimated 10,000 people filled the Dam square on Monday, holding signs and shouting popular chants like “Black lives matter,” and “No justice, no peace.”

✊🏽 In Germany, people gathered in multiple locations throughout Berlin to demand justice for Floyd and fight against police brutality.

✊🏾 A mural dedicated to Floyd was also spray-painted on a stretch of wall in Berlin that once divided the German capital during the Cold War.

✊🏿 In Ireland, protesters held a peaceful demonstration outside of Belfast City Hall, and others gathered outside of the US embassy in Dublin.

✊🏿In Italy, protesters gathered and marched with signs that said “Stop killing black people,” “Say his name,” and “We will not be silent.”

✊🏾 In Spain, people gathered to march and hold up signs throughout Barcelona and Madrid.

✊🏾 In Athens, Greece, protesters took to the streets to collectively hold up a sign that read “I can’t breathe.”

✊🏾 In Brussels, protesters were seen sitting in a peaceful demonstration in front of an opera house in the center of the city.

✊🏾In Denmark, protesters were heard chanting “No justice, no peace!” throughout the streets of Copenhagen, while others gathered outside the US embassy.

✊🏾 In Canada, protesters were also grieving for Regis Korchinski-Paquet, a 29-year-old black woman who died on Wednesday after falling from her balcony during a police investigation at her building.

✊🏾 And in New Zealand, roughly 2,000 people marched to the US embassy in Auckland, chanting and carrying signs demanding justice.

💐 Memorials have been built for Floyd around the world, too. In Mexico City, portraits of him were hung outside the US embassy with roses, candles, and signs.

💐 In Poland, candles and flowers were laid out next to photos of Floyd outside the US consulate.

💐 And in Syria, two artists created a mural depicting Floyd in the northwestern town of Binnish, “on a wall destroyed by military planes.”

Before the assassination of George Floyd some of you were able to say whatever the hell you wanted and the world didn’t say anything to you…

THERE HAS BEEN A SHIFT, AN AWAKENING…MANY OF YOU ARE BEING EXPOSED FOR WHO YOU REALLY ARE. #readthatagain

Don’t wake up tomorrow on the wrong side of this issue. Its not to late to SAY,

“maybe I need to look at this from a different perspective.

Maybe I don’t know what its like to be Black in America…

Maybe, just maybe, I have been taught wrong.”

There is still so much work to be done. It’s been a really dark, raw week. This could still end badly. But all we can do is keep doing the work.

Keep protesting.

The Land Of Nobody…

Good Morning Beautiful!

How did you sleep?

Were your slumbers restful and pleasant or did they have you tossing in your bed?

 

Did you wake refreshed, vibrant and charged for this day or are you among the many of the walking dead,

those who cannot bear the idea of waking because it’s just another groundhog day?

 

Day in and day out,

the same events,

the same stories,

the same people.

 

Waking with a feeling of “why?”

And does any of it,

Especially me, even matter?

 

Looking about your life and questioning if anyone truly cares.

Or are they only there for what you have to offer,

at their convenience.

 

Yes, you know that feeling.

That feeling of,

“Nobody sees me. Nobody loves me. Nobody cares.”

 

This beautiful is the Land of Nobody.

 

And it is not a pretty place to reside.

It is not a place that you can manifest your dreams from,

it will never call into your life your ideal lover,

the money that you crave for,

the health or success.

It will never bear the fruit of happiness.

Because  you see beautiful,

the Land of Nobody,

is a fictitious land that you have created your misery from.

It is a land that you have bought into,

because it is what you feel comfortable in.

 

Oh yes,

I just said that beautiful.

 

The Land of Nobody is one that brings you comfort.

That is a hard pill to swallow I know.

But it is so true.

Just as true as it is that this land will not bring you what you claim you want for,

and most certainly will not bring you what your soul is calling you toward,

and you see THAT is exactly why you are feeling so lost in yourself,

so alone,

so unloved,

so fearful,

so unseen,

unheard,

uncared for or valued.

 

And it is from this place of “UN” that you keep calling in the evidence to support your comfort in suffering.

 

You feel all the “UN” because IT IS NOT TRUE.

 

Your soul KNOWS differently.

Your soul see’s who you really are and what your life has to offer,

but you are withholding yourself from all your glory by focusing in on the finding of the evidence,

the proving to yourself and anyone who will listen,

that you are in the Land of Nobody wants me.

 

And the sad truth beautiful is that as long as you sit here,

focused on the “UN” and the nobody with such passion,

you will NEVER be able to “fix” the problem of what you are manifesting.

 

You will never feel loved.

You will never feel valued.

You will never feel wanted.

 

From this space.

And you will certainly not attract anyone into your world that will “MAKE YOU” feel that way.

 

Because you have created and keep creating a great momentum around not having it show up for you,

that even when the universe/God sends things into your life,

to show you how abundant and loved you really are,

you reject them by looking the other way,

or pushing your will onto life in an attempt to control it and “make it” happen,

thus supporting your need to show that you can’t have it without a fight.

 

Your belief is that life is hard.

That you must suffer.

That you have to work hard to get things that you want.

Your belief is that life is out to get you in some fashion and does not have your back.

 

But that belief is just a thought that you keep active by focusing on finding evidence for it.

 

You “think” it is such and therefore it is.

But you have to change the thoughts in your head,

and the way you are feeling about your life.

You have the WAKE THE F-CK UP.

And start witnessing what could be by putting your focus on that and then not trying to force it into existence.

 

God/Universe does not like being controlled like that,

Does not like having its hands tied,

and if you keep tieing them then you will keep getting what you have been,

because what you want for gets offered day in and day out,

opportunities to have it knock at your door,

but you keep your door locked up tight not allowing the Universe/God to reveal to you your value, your worthiness.

 

So if you won’t let the energy that has created universes to show you a brilliant life worth living and enjoying,

and all your dreams manifesting,

then how the f-ck do you ever expect the people in your life to show it to you?

 

YOU BEAUTIFUL have to open up to it.

You are the only one who can access any of it.

Putting your needs and desires onto others and then getting mad that they won;t do what you want,

when you want,

how you want,

is a self-centered, spoiled, egotistical action.

And will only keep providing you with not having.

 

So if you are among the millions who woke up today,

focused on not having what you want in life,

feeling like you are unloved,

unappreciated,

“UN” somethinged….

 

Then this message is directed at you.

Because I fully understand that feeling of “UN”

that feeling of walking around the Land of Nobody,

and I can tell you that no solution or joy ever came from this place.

 

And we each may venture into this land every now and then,

but it is up to us,

and ONLY US,

venture right back out.

 

So take back your power beautiful,

stop handing it over to the ebbs of your life,

stop looking to not be supported,

and instead KNOW that you are with certainty.

Know that you are loved,

because you love yourself enough to wake the f-ck up and feel it for yourself,

you love yourself enough to stop disrespecting your life,

and instead to open up to it and receive its glory.

 

 

You are worthy beautiful.

You are loved.

You are appreciated and valued.

 

Venture In Certainty for what you want not what you fear.

 

And As Always,

 

Stop Existing & Start Living

“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

 

 

Let’s do this!

You and me,

this summer.

Break free from your shiz once and for all and fall in love with the dynamic, powerhouse that YOU are.

No one is like you.

And you have a life worth sharing,

worth enjoying.

You have one life love.

One.

Let’s make it a F-ck Yes! One NOW.

Message me for deet’s on how to do this.

No One Gives AF!

Brutal truth shared today!
NO ONE CARES IF YOU SUCCEED OR NOT.🤯
No one gives a rats rear end if you do the DAMN THING that you have been saying that you want to do for the last however long you have been saying that you want to do it.
No one effing cares if you do anything,
👉fail…
👉don’t fail….
👉succeed….
👉sorta succeed…
👉don’t succeed.
We are constantly armed with excuses and reasons as to why we cannot do something,
and often many of these reasons and excuses that we spew out of our mouths are based with the concept that someone else actually cares if we are succeeding or not.
We make it sound like it really matters,
like what we choose to design for our lives matters to someone else.
And that they are going to rate us on whatever the DAMN THING is.
But the reality of the matter is,
and if you can get this one down and fully realize it’s truth then you will be miles and miles ahead of so many others,
(because that matters, right?….🤣🤣🤣)
That LITERALLY every damn thing that you are making excuses about,
that you are arguing for WHY YOU CANNOT…
do, be, have,
because of what someone else may say, believe or whatever crap you are feeding yourself, is only your own beliefs about YOU.
And guess what beautiful.
YOU…
yes you, can change those beliefs.
The moment that you get this truth,
the truth that the reason that you don’t have the life that you want,
the relationship that you want,
the money, the house, the car, the job, the health, the body…..
IS BECAUSE OF YOU.
That is the moment that everything will change for you.
Because in this moment of truth beautiful,
you discover your power,
you get the opportunity to realize WHO YOU REALLY ARE.
And that my luv is a MF Manifestor.
You have the creative power of the universe,
of God moving through your veins and you get to create the picture that you want from it,
you no longer have to fret about all this imaginary beliefs that fake people in your life are believing, saying or thinking about you.
Matter a fact,
you get to create the image of YOU that you want.
You get to be YOU.
Free from all the garbage that you have been putting on yourself about what others believe.
You get to CHOOSE.
So if you want to do something wild and crazy….
GREAT!
Do it.
or don’t.
It does not matter.
If you want to change jobs,
change hair colors,
change locations,
change religions,
change lovers….
GREAT!
Do it!
or don’t.
These things are all you baby.
They are your choices.
This is your life.
And at the end of it,
you will only be dealing with YOU and God.
And what you “think” others are believing about you,
about your looks,
your intelligence,
your finances,
your purpose,
your ideas or anything,
well THINK again.
Because what they will be focused on,
is what they have always been focused on.
THEM.
And making what they feel is the best choice for their lives from where they are at RIGHT NOW.
And chances are,
if anything…
they are fearing what your beliefs are of them and their life more then they are thinking or believing anything about you and yours.
So go do that DAMN THING that you have been making excuses over the last six months,
the last year or five years.
Or don’t do it.
The choice is yours.
And this life that you claim you want to manifest,
it will come about when you stop making excuses and stop believing a bunch of illusions about what everyone else is believing about you.
Cuz’ honey, you are important,
but not that important to everyone else that you take up all their thought energy and belief focus.
It is time that you start being important to the most important person in your life….
YOU.
And owning what you want to create.
So stop making excuses or don’t.
Either way it does not matter to any more than one person on this planet….
YOU.
And you baby are worthy of saying YES to the life that you want.
You baby are worthy of manifesting effing greatness.
You baby deserve to live that empowered life.
Because from that empowered place…
you can touch others lives,
and you will start to matter at a deeper level then you could ever imaging.
But, still at the end of the day,
what you choose,
is YOU CHOOSING IT.
Or NOT.
Either way,
you are loved.
Just Be You Without the Excuses.
As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
Let’s do this!
You and me,
this summer.
Break free from your shiz once and for all and fall in love with the dynamic, powerhouse that YOU are.
No one is like you.
And you have a life worth sharing,
worth enjoying.
You have one life love.
One.
Let’s make it a F-ck Yes! One NOW.
Message me for deet’s on how to do this.

My Mom’s 85th Birthday Lesson To Me & To You

Today is a rough day for me.
I am going to get very human with you dear follower and let my heart be heard here,
Yesterday was mother’s day and I hope that if you are a mother or a woman who cares for others in a nurturing fashion that you allowed yourself a moment at very least to be supported and loved on some,
if not by others,
by yourself.
Because you deserve it.
You deserve it not because Hallmark or society has said that on this day you should be recognized and loved,
but because you are a human being with feelings,
with a heart and desires,
you work your mind and body to support and love on others,
some you may have birthed yourself physically,
others you held space for them in times when they needed held and loved,
allowing them to birth themselves through a difficult challenge,
others you guided and helped point out a new path too,
while others you simply just stood still and let them share.
You deserve to give yourself a moment to breathe,
because all of the mothering that you have been doing has helped make our world a better place,
the souls that you have touched you may never know,
because the ripple that your love has had is great and unseen to your current vantage point.
But you have touched more than you know.
The children that you are raising and have raised,
the children that have crossed through your life as friends of your own babies,
they have been impacted.
Your babies are our future.
And look at them.
You are the mother.
You are the one holding it together so they can learn how to swim.
You do not have to have actually birthed a child to be a mother,
motherhood is something that comes from our hearts,
It is an energy of unconditional love and desire to witness something beautiful awaken in our world.
It is a strength that only a mother can understand,
to stand and witness her child,
the one she cares so deeply for and would sacrifice everything for,
to open their wings and fly.
It is a smile that no one sees,
when you feel proud of that, that you have nurtured.
As many of you are aware,
I am the mother to seven, yes seven children, all that I birthed myself, ranging from 24 years down to 5 years.
These souls that God has blessed me to lead,
blessed me to nurture and raise,
to witness as they grow and become who they are,
are my why for everything that I do.
They are my why to lead,
to constantly get in touch with myself and know who I am and let them see me.
They are my why to show that you can thrive in life and still have deep connection, love and family.
They are my why to reveal that life is for the living not the existing,
that freedom starts in your own head and heart,
that doing what’s right may not always appear to be right to others and may go against the grain of society,
that we are all creators.
No matter our sex, we are manifestors of our lives,
they are my why to constantly focus on my energy,
and lead them to put themselves first and speak from their truth.
And yes I am a proud mama.
Because I have seven very unique children,
confident, focused, true to themselves children.
I see the ripple.
What makes today a tough day though,
is that my own mother, who’s birthday is today is turning 85.
And I am not with her.
You see my mama has dementia and she was moved to a home a distance away from me where I have not been able to see her for some time,
then COVID happened and you cannot visit the elderly.
My mom was already losing who I was a couple years ago,
she was thinking I was her sister and she was falling back into memories of Natzi Germany and concentration camps that they went through,
it became more and more difficult to see her in this state,
my heart would crack to witness her,
and I was struggling. So I had to come to terms with the reality that my mom was passing before my eyes while still “existing physically here.” I had to let her go.
And then I started to notice that she was getting more and more lost in her story lines, she at one point had me getting killed by the Mexican Mafia and told me a horrific tale,
so now, here on the day of her birthday I sit wishing that I could go hug her, tell her,
“Mom, I am doing good, your grandchildren are doing good, your great grandchildren are growing strong and happy, we are all good. We love you.”
But I cannot.
Mainly because of COVID,
but secondly the terror it would cause her to see her daughter resurrected from the dead,
followed with a brief moment of realization that she is not right in the head and that she is losing herself.
To witness her realizing that she cannot recall her life,
her loved ones, her memories or even be present in her current moment is a deep pain to bare,
to hold space for.
And now with COVID I am unsure if I will ever see her again.
And I have guilt and shame around this topic in my life.
I feel bad as though I am a horrible daughter for what appears walking away, staying away,
Letting her go.
Today I mourn my mom.
Today I let her go a bit more.
Today I say goodbye again.
It’s not a happy birthday but a good bye.
And my heart hurts at typing it.
My heart hurts at sharing this little reality with you dear one.
And so it is that all things come to pass.
All things must be let go,
and the lesson that I feel pressed on me,
is to not let your life go until it is time,
to stop existing and making excuses,
living in fear.
Because your days are not promised on this earth,
your memories can be lost while your body still remains.
There is much we must get right with letting go of,
but the moment of NOW is not one of them.
 
Love Now.
Live Now.
Stop Making Excuses.
 
And As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
 
Lets get you living now! What are you waiting for?
1:1 coaching available globally.

If You Don’t Have Courage You Are F-cked!

OMG! I am so addicted to Ozark.

I have been just loving this Netflix series and a person like myself that never really sits down to watch television of any sort. It’s perfect to find a series that is a few seasons in so I can binge watch it at points in my life when I am in the groove to do just that.

 

And that is what I have been doing in the evenings a few nights a week over the last month.

 

So I am on Season 3 of Ozark,

and don’t worry all you peep’s who are on previous seasons,

I am not going to spoil anything  for you in this share today.

But this season for sure does some twists and turns and leaves you going, “well that is about time” at points and then has you saying, “OMFG! did that just happen?” at other points.

 

The other night though, Wendy the main female lead for Ozark was putting on an event for this politician. As they were walking around the event site discussing things they end up in a conversation about what people want from a leader, and Wendy with her background in politics says to this man, “If you don’t have courage you are f-cked!”

 

This man’s face was questioning and curious to her statement, and she goes on to explain simply to him that the people want to see and will only follow and respect someone who has the balls to stand out there and speak up.

 

Which made me think about the truth of this statement.

And what it means to you and me,

the common folk (lol… I am far from f-cking common…and I hope that you are too.)

 

To be courageous in life.

To be courageous in our desires.

To be courageous in our relationships,

and with our health and well-being.

To be courageous in our work,

in our play,

in our spiritual paths.

 

Courageous equates to this simple truth,

Fortune or even better Well-Being and Abundance of all things wanted for favors the BOLD.

 

AKA – COURAGEOUS.

 

SO what Wendy in Ozark stated is true for any of us,

if we wanat for a life that manifests our dreams,

that provides us with the love and money,

the health and purpose,

the connection and respect,

the fulfillment that we want for,

then we must be couragous or we are f-cked.

 

In not being courageous we sacrifice EVERYTHING.

We turn it over to the luck of the draw you could say and our draw will remain of unsatisfactory measures because we are throwing our hands up and being a victim to the world instead of boldly standing in our dream, in our passion, in our truth.

 

People come to me all the time,

and even just this last few days in my dozen or so client appointment that I did 1:1 with beautiful peep’s,

I was presented the common statement of,

 

” I just can’t stop thinking this way.”

” I am just stuck right here and I don’t know what to do.”

“Everything I try doing does not work.”

“You said just turn my attention to something that feels better and that only works for a few moments then I am right back to the crazy, crazy in my head where I am caught in a negative loop.”

 

Well, my soul response to these statements,

these beliefs that are being verbalized is simple,

“It takes f-cking courage to catch yourself and to stay the course of loving yourself enough to see when you are down this rabbit hole and know that there is not a damn thing that you can do about it because you have built too much momentum around it.

 

It takes courage to see this truth, to take responsibility for it and love yourself out of it by dropping that ball of momentum and focusing in on something that feels totally off topic and silly,

even meaningless, but has no negative charge to it. Is easy. and then apply playful focus to this meaningless thought that actually feels good.

 

It takes courage to do this.

Because it goes against everything that we have been taught in our human experience by those who we love and respect, who have our best interest in heart and who have lived more than us. It takes courage to go against the concept that we have to dig more into an issue to resolve it and change it.

 

But when you truly think about it it’s crazy to keep adding more attention to that, that we do not desire to manifest. Focusing in on it will only guarantee our failure, or the same results that we have been getting and will only assure us more negative feelings and fear. It will only solidify the evidence against us.

 

You can not fix a problem as long as you are part of it.

You can not change negative thoughts and feelings that have a ton of momentum as long as you remain in them,

being in the middle of the thought and trying to think yourself out of it from that space of negativity and focus on the subject that you have resistance, thus pain wrapped up around will NEVER,

I mean never get you what you want.

You will never change your stinking thinking this way.

 

You will only expand and grow in it to create more of it and bounce around from negative thought to negative thought with a split second of relief here and there, only to give it back up again to what you are comfortable in,

the negative.

 

So if you are wanting to change your physical, mental and emotional experiences in your life to something that feels more fulfilling, loving, connective, joyful and abundant than you have to be courageous enough to catch yourself in your crap and then courageous enough to to drop it where it is and just except that that though path is going to run a muck, but you don’t have to keep playing with it, you don’t have to keep it active. And your best bet is to find something that is almost meaningless to play with, but is easy to think good about, to feel good about.

 

Create momentum around that and watch the other fizzle out.

 

It’s a bold move love.

It’s going to require you to step away from the comfort of chaos and drama,

away from your normal feelings,

away from what you perceive as your truth,

and to instead stand in courage and do what is right for you.

 

And when you do this consistently the rewards will be phenomenal.

Your life picture will change,

your path will expand and your dreams will start to emerge before your eyes like magic.

 

What you want for, wants you too.

But you have to have the courage to level up yourself and your life to manifest it with ease.

 

You are so worthy of this and more.

Have courage today to soothe yourself instead of beat yourself.

 

In love to you always.

And As Always,

 

Stop Existing & Start Living

 

“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

 

You were born worthy of so much more than what you are allowing right now.

 

It is time that you say YES to you.

Message Me for deet’s on 1:1 coaching now.

I can kick your a*s from anywhere globally.

The Only Question You Ever Need Ask Yourself to Create Your Dream Life.

How do you define your reality?

 

Many years ago I was attending a study group consistently focused on the technology of the soul.

In my study, I was consistently asked to witness my ego,

to see my shadow side and to know that I could never destroy it. That it was going to grow and expand side by side to my light, to my soul.

 

It was revealed to me in this four year in depth training that all of my suffering was by my choice. That I could let my ego feel the pain and recognize it as such,

or I could have soul damage and wounding by not letting my soul shine and speak its truth.

 

Now this may be a difficult conversation for some to understand. And this particular musing is not going to go into depth on it as I would do with a private client of mine,

However, the point that I wish to share with you here is one of great importance if you are among the many in the world who crave for a better life.

 

We get to choose.

The bible referred to this as free will.

And what is meant by this is that we have the creative ability, the power to define our reality through our will.

 

To define our purpose through our will means to focus our desire.

To understand that we are the co-creator of the life that we are living and that our consciousness and perspective on our life experience is what creates it.

 

The life that you are living right now,

did not occur right now.

It was created by the thoughts you have been thinking,

and your feelings toward those thoughts.

The pictures that you have been day dreaming or day nightmaring about.

 

Your reality has been manifested by your focus.

By your will.

 

And here is where the tough shiz happens.

It’s the reality check about your reality.

 

If you want to have a flowing, life based in ease,

in beauty, and love.

Where you are not attracting the drastic contrasting situations and experiences, but instead perhaps work out your contracting visions quickly with a thought or inner conversation that you let go of quickly,

then you MUST get real about who is creating your reality.

 

So back to the question of today.

 

How do you define your reality?

 

If I were to ask you to list three to five words or sentences that define your reality what would you say?

 

Perhaps you should take a moment right now to jot those down. And once you have them in writing, in front of your face where you cannot argue what your words are,

I want you to ask if this reality that you are defining is:

 

👉 Real – are you living it now. Are you feeling it at your core if it is not currently manifest.

👉Is this reality supportive of your best life.

👉your truth and beliefs or someone else’s.

 

 

A Lot of the time we lie to ourselves.

We look at inquiry like what I have given you here today,

and we know what we “should” be answering and so because we view it as a test,

and everyone wants to do good on the test,

we answer what we know or think the “right” responses are instead of what our truth is.

 

And here is how you can tell if you are doing this.

Look at what is showing up in your world consistently.

If what you are writing and what you have showing up are polar different,

then guess what?

 

It’s time for a REALITY CHECK,

because the last one you did was not real.

You were telling fibs to yourself love,

because it hurt.

It hurt to see your truth. It hurt to see the brutalities that you may have been painting for yourself.

It hurt that what is showing up is not as bad as what you keep painting and you just don’t feel worthy of a good life so you gotta create some drama,

so you paint some tales in your head about struggle.

Perhaps, you have a bunch of people in your life that are struggling and you just don’t fit in with them,

so you shrink yourself and make up a shitty tale to match,

to fit in.

Not realizing that if you keep telling yourself these crap tales that you will over time start to believe them at a core level and manifest them.

 

Or….

 

Maybe you are painting a beautiful picture,

one where you have the love,

the money,

the health and opportunities that you want,

but what keeps showing up is nothing of the sort.

And you wonder why.

And the why is simple luv,

You don’t believe that you are worthy of the pictures and statements that you are creating.

 

And what you have materializing is what you believe you are worthy of.

 

This is that shadow self that I was speaking of earlier,

this is where we have to let ourselves feel the pain,

but let it be held by our ego’s.

 

That simply means to step out of the comfort of doing what you always do which is, make excuses and come up with reasons,

and in turn have the will to move toward what you want for.

This will require you to consistently witness your ego,

witness your fear,

witness your desire to control,

witness your foul concepts of self and others,

watch the words that you speak and that you chatter on with in your head and how they make you feel,

and consistently ask yourself if it is true or not.

 

You must be willing to call yourself out of the darkness and into the light.

 

And it is going to hurt like a motherf-cker luv.

It is.

 

But you are worth it.

 

Your other choice is to let your soul suffer and carry with it the wounds of not living the life that you were called to live,

to continue to shrink yourself,

no matter the reason,

and to never taste the glory that you were born to enjoy.

 

How do you define your reality?

 

And As Always,

Stop Existing & Start Living

 

“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

 

You were born worthy of so much more than what you are allowing right now.

It is time that you say YES to you.

Join me in a 4 week 1:1 mastermind intensive to learn the 7 keys to creating the life of your dreams no matter the chaos of the world.

Message me for deet’s now before the special ends on May 3rd, 2020.

Here Is Why You Are Not Receiving Your Blessings.

 

Blessings are abound my love,

but you refuse to see them.

 

Your life is expanding,

your fortune is growing,

your soul is speaking to you and guiding you with each breath that you take,

but you my love,

ignore and choose to focus on things of past that do not matter.

You choose to pull forth your fears instead of your blessings and desires.

Why my love?

Why do you insist on living a saga instead of a dream?

Why do you choose to suffer and rage,

to fear and struggle instead just simply letting go of all of those things that you were caught up in yesterday and last month or year,

and instead firmly step into what you want and who you truly are?

 

You question and huff why good things happen to everyone else and not to you,

you fixate on life being hard.

And ignore the blessings and abundance,

the quick manifestation,

the miracles that just seem to happen each day,

you ask for help and it is always there,

always showing up for you and never being acknowledged,

yet you say how important gratitude is to you,

you say that you are awakened,

you say that you are doing your best,

you say so much,

but what you are doing much of is fearing life.

 

And that, that you fear will continue to scare you.

You give it reason,

you give it purpose and strength.

You give it life my love.

And no one on this planet can ever help you out of this drama that you so eagerly keep yourself in.

 

The excuses and reasons,

the finger pointing.

The blame and bitterness,

it is nothing more than resistance to your blessings.

To your worthiness and an ignoring of the glory that is all about you.

 

Today.

And Always.

 

But you turn away.

You close your eyes,

just as you may choose to disregard this message and blame the economy,

the government,

the world crisis,

your health or another human.

you may blame your broken heart,

or your upbringing,

but all of that blame,

yes all of it,

is your resistance to your birth right of worthiness and well being.

 

You were not born to struggle.

You were not born to fear.

You were not born to live in such drama and pain.

 

Wellbeing is who you are.

Wellbeing is what life’s all about,

It is the natural flow of our lives as abundance in all things that we love, and bringing us joy are part of the natural tides of our lives.

 

So why do you resist your nature my love?

Why do you desire so to not live the glory that God wants for you and offers each moment?

Why do you keep fighting for your lack?

 

When all you ever need to do is say yes to your blessings.

Yes to you.

yes to everything that is always being offered to best support and love  you now.

 

Get out of your past failures and fears,

step away from the pain and know that you can put it down,

put your attention on what you want.

Bring your heart into alignment with joy.

Into alignment with love.

And let yourself triumph over the fear of yesterday.

 

You are a king.

You are a queen.

You are the creator of your day.

 

Today.

And Always.

 

So say goodbye to reasons and excuses.

Claim your life now,

the way that it has always been intended.

 

Say Yes — To YOU!

 

And As Always,

 

Stop Existing & Start Living

 

“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

WATCH – You Want THIS But You Can’t Have It. Remember to like and leave a comment. 🙂

 

 

Take advantage right now of a lifetime opportunity to work with me in my intensive 4 week mastermind where you get to work 1:1 with me to learn the keys that I woke up to back in 2009 and changed my whole life outcome with.  Let me guide you through the weeds and to your garden luv, you know that you desire and deserve it. Let’s make it happen. Message me for deet’s