“I remember the first time I sucked a man’s cock. I was 19 years old and desperate to explore my sexuality (the high school boys always seemed too “immature”).
I’d spent several days anticipating my upcoming tryst with this man and poured over the internet for hours looking for the best ways to give head.
After memorizing what seemed like countless “Top 10” articles, I deemed myself an expert and set out on my mission for fellatio.
The hungry little slut was born.
14 years and (*ahem*) several cocks later, I’ve found myself even more in love with sucking cock.
The soft folds in my mouth. The sweet-acrid taste. The way a man yields control with every flick of my tongue.
It’s one of the most erotic experiences for me.
The other day, I found a new level of joy in this practice. My partner kneeled upright and straddled my face, while I lay on my back underneath him. This way I could work the underbelly of his head, as well as delight in the gentle curve where his shaft met his testicles.
It was exquisite. Licking his balls while stroking him with my hands, I felt like I was at an endless buffet. He slipped his fingers in my pussy, pressing up, warming and wetting me, as I reached around to finger his asshole.
The more turned-on I got, the more I wanted him in my mouth.
I wanted him to fuck the back of my throat.
My back arched as my pussy reached for his hands. His fingers slipped in and out in sync with his own hips. It was as if his cock reached down my throat and made direct contact with my clit. The gagging, the spitting, the squirting – it was all an orgiastic delight that made me hungry for him. I wanted him more and more inside of me. I wanted to devour him.
Until I couldn’t take anymore. I cried out, my eyes rolled back and my whole body rocked and rippled in the choked agony of climax. I was in bliss.
There is an exquisite joy in sucking a man’s cock – something that I think more people could experience if we can let go of the idea that a man has power over us if we go down on him. Nothing could be further from the truth.
It takes an incredible amount of trust and surrender for a man to properly receive your mouth.
I suggest we give up the power struggle, admit our resentments, forgive each other and get back to the good, old-fashioned joy of fellatio.
And so, dear ones, I offer you …
3 delicious tips to help you discover the joy of sucking cock.
#1 Do it because you like it.
The moment you start doing it because you want him to think you’re nice or because he ate your pussy or bought you dinner, you are LYING, and therefore creating a barrier between yourself and your own (and his) pleasure.
Truth is always the biggest turn-on, so if you aren’t feeling it, that’s OK.
It’s always best to move from your own pleasure. You will know the difference and he will definitely feel the difference.
And the same goes for how you are sucking his cock. There are 1001 techniques (some helpful, some moronic) on how to give head, but if you are caught in the owner’s manual, you aren’t actually feeling him and you certainly aren’t surrendering into your own joy. Plus, your unbridled enthusiasm is what he wants most. So stay connected to what gives you the most pleasure in your own mouth and continue from there.
#2 Slow down.
Many women and men make the mistake of grabbing someone’s dick and going to town like a spasmodic porn star. But that’s usually no fun for most people. Imagine someone grabbing you and thrusting away without any warm up.
So take your time. Feel his curves. Invite him out to play. Discover him.
There is so much to be experienced in the in-between spaces. Maybe you don’t even start with his cock, but gently kiss your way up from his feet to his thighs. Your honest and curious exploration will help keep your attention on him, but we usually need to start slow to stay present.
Remember: the longer the anticipation, the sweeter the gratification.
#3 Communicate, communicate, communicate.
Did I mention communicate? It is so important, for everyone’s pleasure, that you remain in constant dialogue regarding your and your partner’s desires (just don’t talk with your mouth full).
Maybe you don’t want him to cum in your mouth. Tell him that ahead of time. Ask him if he has any areas he doesn’t want touched. Maybe you’d like him to wash up before you put your mouth on him. Maybe you need to work a little around his foreskin before pulling it down and exposing him (if he’s uncircumcised).
Whatever’s on your mind, say it – and invite him to do the same. As I said before, the truth is the biggest turn-on. And when you know each other’s boundaries and desires, you both can easily relax into the experience and delight in the joy of sucking cock.
#4 BONUS TIP!
Not so much a tip but just a gentle reminder to …
A: lube up (saliva or coconut oil work great) and
B: cover your teeth with your lips at all times (needs no explanation).
HAPPY COCK SUCKING!
Candice is currently crowdfunding for her upcoming book “From 6 to 9 and Beyond: Widening the Lens of Feminine Eroticism.” Support this unique writer HERE
Original Article Post on My Tiny Secrets – Get Great Tip’s and Education from this phenomenal site
“When a woman finds a man who gives good head, she’s found a treasure she’s not going to let go of too quickly. This is one rare customer and she knows it. She won’t even tell her girlfriends about it or that guy will become the most popular man in town.”
Hey, I have a lot of respect for all you guys who like to eat pussy because there are too few of you out there. And I’m not the only woman who says this. Furthermore, some of you guys who are giving it the old college try are not doing too well, so maybe this little lesson will help you out.
When a woman finds a man who gives good head, she’s found a treasure she’s not going to let go of too quickly. This is one rare customer and she knows it. She won’t even tell her girlfriends about it or that guy will become the most popular man in town. So, remember, most guys can fuck, and those who can usually do it satisfactorily, but the guy who gives good head, he’s got it made.
The Pussy-Licking-Guide for evolved people in 15 magical steps
#1: Tell her she is beautiful and mean it.
Most women are shy about their bodies. Even if you’ve got the world’s most gorgeous woman in bed with you, she’s going to worry about how you like her body. Tell her it’s beautiful, tell her which parts you like best, tell her anything, but get her to trust you enough to let you down between her legs.
#2 Stop and appreciate her unique flower
Now stop and look at what you see. Beautiful, isn’t it? There is nothing that makes a woman more unique than her pussy. I know. I’ve seen plenty of them. They come in all different sizes, colors and shapes; some are tucked inside like a little girl’s cunnie and some have thick luscious lips that come out to greet you. Some are nested in brushes of fur and others are covered with transparent fuzz. Appreciate your woman’s unique qualities and tell her what makes her special.
#3 Women are more verbal: Talk to her beautiful pussy
Women are a good deal more verbal than men, especially during love-making. They also respond more to verbal love, which means, the more you talk to her, the easier it will be to get her off. So all the time you’re petting and stroking her beautiful pussy, talk to her about it.
#4 Lick her outer lips, inner lips and find her clit
Now look at it again. Gently pull the lips apart and look at her inner lips, even lick them if you want to. Now spread the tops of her pussy up until you can find her clit. Women have clits in all different sizes, just like you guys have different sized cocks. It doesn’t mean a thing as far as her capacity for orgasm. All it means is more of her is hidden underneath her foreskin.
#5 Whenever you touch a woman’s pussy, make sure your finger is wet
Whenever you touch a woman’s pussy, make sure your finger is wet. You can lick it or moisten it with juices from inside her. Be sure, by all means, to wet it before you touch her clit because it doesn’t have any juices of it’s own and it’s extremely sensitive. Your finger will stick to it if it’s dry and that hurts. But you don’t want to touch her clit anyway. You have to work up to that. Before she becomes aroused, her clit is too delicate to be handled.
#6 Tease her & approach her pussy slowly
Approach her pussy slowly. Women, even more so than men, love to be teased. The inner part of her thigh is her most tender spot. Lick it, kiss it, make designs on it with the tip of your tongue. Come dangerously close to her pussy, then float away. Make her anticipate it.
#7 Play with her
Now lick the crease where her leg joins her pussy. Nuzzle your face into her bush. Brush your lips over her slit without pressing down on it to further excite her. After you’ve done this to the point where your lady is bucking up from her seat and she’s straining to get more of you closer to her, then put your lips right on top of her slit.
#8 Kiss her, gently, then harder
Kiss her, gently, then harder. Now use your tongue to separate her pussy lips and when she opens up, run your tongue up and down between the layers of pussy flesh. Gently spread her legs more with your hands. Everything you do with a woman you’re about to eat must be done gently.
#9 Tongue-fuck her
Tongue-fuck her. This feels divine. It also teases the hell out of her because by now she wants some attention given to her clit. Check it out. See if her clit has gotten hard enough to peek out of it’s covering. If so, lick it. If you can’t see it, it might still be waiting for you underneath. So bring your tongue up the top of her slit and feel for her clit. You may barely experience it’s presence. But even if you can’t feel the tiny pearl, you can make it rise by licking the skin that covers it. Lick hard now and press into her skin.
#10 Work her tip of the iceberg
Gently pull the pussy lips away and flick your tongue against the clit, hood covered or not. Do this quickly. This should cause her legs to shudder. When you sense she’s getting up there toward orgasm, make your lips into an O and take the clit into your mouth.
Start to suck gently and watch your lady’s face for her reaction. If she can handle it, begin to suck harder. If she digs it, suck even harder. Go with her. If she lifts her pelvis into the air with the tension of her rising orgasm, move with her, don’t fight her. Hang on, and keep your hot mouth on her clit. Don’t let go. That’s what she’ll be saying too: ‘Don’t stop. Don’t ever stop!’
There’s a reason for that, most men stop too soon. Just like with cock sucking, this is something worth learning about and worth learning to do well. I know a man who’s a lousy fuck, simply lousy, but he can eat pussy like nobody I know and he never has trouble getting a date. Girls are falling all over him.
#11 Finger-fuck her with TWO fingers
But back to your pussy eating session…There’s another thing you can do to intensify your woman’s pleasure. You can finger-fuck her while she’s enjoying your clit-licking talents. Before, during or after. She’ll really like it. In addition to the erogenous zones surrounding her clit, a woman has another extremely sensitive area at the roof of her vagina. This is what you rub up against when you’re fucking her. Well, since your cock is pretty far away from your mouth, your fingers will have to do the fucking.
Take two fingers. One is too skinny and three is too wide and therefore can’t get deep enough. Make sure they’re wet so you don’t irritate her skin. Slide them inside, slowly at first, then a little faster. Fuck her with them rhythmically. Speed up only when she does. Listen to her breathing.
She’ll let you know what to do. If you’re sucking her clit and finger-fucking her at the same time, you’re giving her far more stimulation than you would be giving her with your cock alone. So you can count on it that she’s getting high on this. If there’s any doubt, check her out for symptoms.
#12 Get to know her orgasmic symptoms to become even better
Each woman is unique.
- You may have one who’s nipples get hard when she’s excited
- or only when she’s having an orgasm.
- Your girl might flush red or
- begin to tremble.
Get to know her symptoms and you’ll be a more sensitive lover.
#13 Don’t let go of her clit when she starts to orgasm – The Multi-Orgasmic Woman
When she starts to have an orgasm, for heaven’s sakes, don’t let go of that clit. Hang in there for the duration. When she starts to come down from the first orgasm, press your tongue along the underside of the clit, leaving your lips covering the top. Move your tongue in and out of her cunt. If your fingers are inside, move them a little too, gently though, things are extremely sensitive just now.
If you play your cards right, you’ll get some multiple orgasms this way. A woman stays excited for a full hour after she’s had an orgasm. Do you realize the full impact of that information? The potential? One woman was clocked at 56 orgasms at one sitting. Do you know what effect you would have on a woman you gave 56 orgasms to? She’d be yours as long as you wanted her.
#14 The cherry on the cake
Some women like to have their man rub and enter their anal section with their finger while they are being eaten out!
#15 After the orgasmic wave: Keep making love to her quietly
The last advice I have for you is this: After you’ve made her come, made her your slave by giving her the best head she’s ever had, don’t leave her alone just yet. Talk to her, stroke her body, caress her breasts. Keep making love to her quietly until she’s come all the way down. A man can get off and go to sleep in the same breath and feel no remorse, no sense of loss. But a woman by nature requires some sensitivity from her lover in those first few moments after sex.
Oral sex can be the most exciting sexual experiences you can have. But it’s what you make it. Take your time, practice often, pay attention to your lover’s signals, and most of all, enjoy yourself.
Now get to it and make your partner smile and love you forever!
With Love, Tammy, Linda and Nicole
Original Posting on My Tiny Secrets
Image credit to the amazing NVM Illustration & Camille Damage (visit her blog – an intriguing photographer) Editors Note: Follow MyTinySecrets on facebook. Only for grown-ass people! If you dig this article, you might as well be intrigued by this tiny secret
It’s time to get to know the most pleasurable part of your body once and for all.
You know that saying, “I don’t know art, but I know what I like”? Well, that pretty much sums up the clitoris for me. I don’t fully comprehend it, and honestly, I don’t try to dive too deep into its complexities. I just appreciate it, and as such, want it displayed prominently, highly revered, and ideally touched up regularly with some powerful brush strokes (preferably clockwise).
This week, however, just happens to be International Clitoris Awareness Week (seriously, this is an actual thing!) So to properly celebrate, we’re schooling you on the things you probably — no, definitely — never knew about the mythical clitoris (aka the only part of the body designed solely to get you off).
And remember, masterpiece means orgasm here. So, yeah, listen up.
1. The word “clitoris” is derived from the Greek word for “key”. As in key to your heart, or probably more accurate, the key to the city as it can certainly open lots of doors.
2. Thought you knew where your clitoris was? Nope, it’s not just that little button (the glans, if we’re being scientific). It’s actually within the pelvis — extending deep within you. Don’t believe me? See a diagram from the Museum Of Sex here.
3. Like a fine wine, your clitoris gets better with age. It’s reported that the clitoris starts growing upon puberty, and is almost quadruple in size by the time you reach early 30s; by menopause, seven times its size. That whole “why old people allegedly get it on a lot” theory is suddenly becoming crystal clear.
4. There are 8,000 nerve endings in the clitoris. 8,000! Sorta makes you wonder about the guys who can’t get you off, amiright?
5. It’s got some penis personality. Although they couldn’t physically look any more different, there are a few striking similarities in their make-up including erectile tissue, foreskin and even a shaft. Oh, and the clitoris also grows when aroused, it just doesn’t prop through our pants when the wind hits it right (or, not that you can see anyway.) Religious or not, that deserves an Amen.
“At the moment of mutual climax, each as individuals has no more significance to the other than the gates of heaven for the one within.” – Swami Saying
“Breathless we kissed each other, fully intoxicated not only in our love for each other but also for the divine essence of its rapture that we were entering into. His whiskers teased my flesh as his lips tasted my bosom and slowly moved downward across my stomach and then his breath, warm and igniting cascaded across my vulva. A flicker of his tongue here and there, gentle thrusts of it entering the ripples of my yoni’s lips. I could feel my hunger growing as I became wetter and wetter. As he devoured my sacred palace of love and enjoyed its sweet nectars I slowly allowed myself to enter the mystical world of orgasm. A medative state manifested with each releasing moan of pleasure. Soon my flesh wanted to feel more of him, a deeper state of orgasm and full unity of deep penetration into a new realm of mystery, love and liberation.
Pulling him upward, asking him to enter me with his wand of light, my anticipation grew and time seemed to pause. I could feel the inner realms of my pussy quaking and begging to grab a hold of his hard cock and suck on it as it thrusted within my palace.
At last the moment of his arrival.
A deep sense of pleasure, comfort and connection came through my being with each stroke. Deep penetrative strokes blended with deep penetrative kisses, our hearts began the dance of this love making. Slow, gentle and almost relaxing as the energy increased our hunger for each other with each quiver of our flesh. Chakras opening and aligning our vibrations. At times he would pause, breathe deep, allowing the orgasm to travel up through his being as well as the energy surging from his cock to pulsate my cervix and upward through my core and into my heart. Once climax (ejaculation) had been recycled, he continued with rhythmic motion as my vaginal muscles squeezed, massaged and pulsated around him. Then just as energy was intensifying, he escorted himself out of my pleasure palace and asked if he could penetrate me to a greater depth, teasing my anal rose bud with his cock.
A deep breath of connection as I opened myself to him in this intense lovemaking fashion. Face to face, heart to heart, he slowly, gently penetrated me. Pausing allowing my muscles to accept and flex as they needed so that they could fully invite him in. Then nudging deeper and deeper within me. My breath was held for a moment and then overtaken with an intense pleasure that was beyond words. Slow strokes of his member gently allowing me to die into this passionate pleasure of bliss.
Loosing myself with each stroke, my hands uncontained reached over my head, grabbing at pillow, the head board, whatever they could find. The intensity of bliss raptured like a comet coming into contact with the sun. I begged him not to stop, but instead to take me further. I wanted to become so vulnerable to this higher state of consciousness, to this land that we rarely touch. I wanted to feel as though he and I no longer existed, we were nothing and yet everything. Fully united and yet cosmic sparks of the creators bliss. As books, a lamp, a candle and who knows what sprayed off the night stand and onto the floor from my hands gone astray I only could find myself longing for this “la petite mort” to never end. For in this small death of my heart I too was being reborn into a new alignment of greater vibration and climactic understanding of self and of God .”
Many a great student of the sacred sexual arts as well as of spiritual development knows that enlightenment is something that we are all born with; it is not something to chase after and to attain. The path to what we call enlightenment is held within our own sacred wombs. It is a treasure box of mystery and of bliss that the majority of human kind is scared to open yet craves to experience. Abram Maslow, through research he conducted involving people who he identified as “self actualized” came to the conclusion that people who reach this level share some commonalities… one being that they “routinely experienced orgasm as a spiritual experience, mystical even.” Napoleon Hill in his 1938 publication of Think and Grow Rich discovered that all the greats of time shared the ability to transmute their strong sexual energy into a driving force that would allow them to manifest the life that they desired. He called this transmutation the ability to transform mediocrity into genius.
If we were to explore all the enlightened cultures of the world gone by we would see that they all revered sex and its magical ability to manifest abundance and bring its students to a higher divine state of consciousness.
“The goal of life is to make your heartbeat match the heartbeat of the universe. To match your nature with Nature.” Joseph Campbell
Here is the secret of “The Secret” or the Law of Attraction or Affinity. There are many things that we can do to set ourselves into the vortex of creation but among them the most powerful and most pleasurable as well as fun is to allow ourselves to experience La Petite Mort (the little death) through the life altering state of orgasm. In this state of living expression we destroy our false parts and give birth to our true nature, that being one of a god/goddess; the creator of our own destiny. Many people experience “orgasm” as climax or a high peak that lasts but only a sniffle in time. This is sad that such an alchemizing event is belittled into a momentary muscle spasm of stress release. We view our relationships and our orgasms as something of minor use. In today’s views many people think of their relationships as economic agreements of convenience. These relations are of no real use other than to save money on taxes, get another to feel committed and abide what the contract states or to keep the status quo in good standing for society. Often these contracts are sold to us at youth as a sign of abiding love and something we should desire, but once we grow up and walk down the isle of this lie we discover that most of the time the contract is actually only self imposed shackles that detour us from our true nature and divine ability of create a beautiful world. FACT is our relationships can be significant catalysts to designing the life we desire. They are the harvesting ground for the planting and nurturing of our DREAMS. Each orgasm that we allow to devour us takes us to a new thresh hold of life experience and understanding, bringing us a step, a leap or a bound closer to awakening to the enlightenment of God that lays dormant within our cells.
When we fully surrender to orgasm at this level it becomes what Maslow described in his discovery, “… a spiritual experience, mystical even.” It is in this sacred space of orgasm that we can discover ourselves again and again. Each time at a new vibrational level. To quote Joseph Campbell. “We must be willing to let go of the life that we have planned, in order to accept the life that is waiting for us.” This can only happen through surrender and when we are willing to surrender at this level of living we embrace these multiple mini deaths of self and realization and sometimes even larger, more monumental deaths and we come to the place that Anais Nin spoke of: those who live this deeply have NO fear of physical death.
In orgasm we physiologically change. This is done through hormones and neurotransmitters shifting and being released into our systems. Our physical bodies release fluids that cleanse us and nourish, we for a moment in time escapes the conscious mind and the ego and are liberated into greater parts of the Tree of Life. Yet so many of us allow ourselves to not explore this deep timeless state of surrender and rejuvenation. We prevent ourselves from our maximum capacity to attract all that we long for into our lives by only experiencing superficial orgasms. In a full state of surrender into orgasm we can experience space and time without separation. It is truly this transcendent state that we all crave and try to achieve in any way that is possible. For many though we try and touch this place of mindlessness in an unhealthy way or one that allows us to breathe in life through adrenaline. Weather the vice is an after work drink to relax the nerves and set the conscious mind at bay or an exciting sky diving lesson, it is the experience of life in a higher state of vibration that we are craving. It is the touching of the creator’s big toe that our heart and souls desire to embrace in experience during this physical reality. M. Scott Peck in his book, “Further Along the Road Less Traveled,” says that in order for us to reach the highest spiritual climax possible, through intercourse naturally there has to be a deep spiritual connection between lovers. Once we reach that “brief peak point of little death” we lose some sense of physical reality no longer completely grounded in the earthly world, a loss of ego, self, separateness… it is a state of ego death. When we release the ego all that we are left with is LOVE. In this state of blissfulness the world will rearrange itself just for us allowing us to become the great alchemists of it.
In this spiritual climax we can overcome all obstacles. We can choreograph our life according to our soul’s purpose and heart’s desire and we can call down the blessing from heaven that God longs to share. Here we don’t just exist and make it through another day, content with a mediocre reality, her we excel in life experience and truly LIVE the life that we were destined for. Here in this state of orgasm we reach a new level of mind blowing meditation and climactally embrace the world.
All you have to do is ask yourself if you BELIEVE that YOU are worth your dreams? Or would you rather settle for a life of average and ordinary, one where the after work cocktail and the superficial sniffle of the average orgasm is what you are allowing to be the highlights of your life exploration?
The power in your coming desires to GIVE you the life you always have dreamed of.
The elusive female orgasm, what is it and how many types are there? For many years and still in some views women don’t have orgasms. EVER! Yet the majority of the world has come to the reality that like men, women are sexual beings whom enjoy orgasms. Matter a fact women are blessed with the ability to have multiple orgasms (waves) and it is uncertain as to just how many types of orgasm a woman can actually experience. I am going to cover the three main types of female orgasm here and give a brief summary of the other eight that are most taught in Tantric Therapy. As well as a peek at the two most powerful Orgasms that are highly sought after and needed for female health.
In today’s time many women claim not to have vaginal orgasms and this is very possible because of the blocked trauma that is preventing them of doing such. However ALL women are able to have vaginal orgasms once their physical, mental and emotional bodies are healed and united. Indeed, this type of orgasm can be tricky to achieve. For multiple reasons, one being, the vagina is not exactly optimally designed for maximum orgasmic potential — most of the sensations are felt in the first (outer) third of the vagina. Unlike a man’s penis that is sensitive all over the shaft area the internal cavities of the vagina are not. Unless proper healing and body/mind/emotion connection has been harmonized allowing for optimum sensation on the walls of the vagina. Experts and researchers such as Barbara Keesling have discussed the pleasure potential of the “cul-de-sac” — an area at the back of the vaginal canal, just behind where the cervix enters the vagina. Women can experience very intense orgasms with stimulation here. Some refer to this as “the X-spot. This area of the vagina near and on the cervix is very sensitive for the majority of women. However some are “numb” at the cervix area. Any woman who has had her lover press deep into her and push on her cervix most likely knows what this can feel like. For most women that have experienced some sort of traumatic, emotional experience(s) in their lifetime however, this feeling may not be pleasurable AT ALL. Instead it may feel like a dagger and the pain from the pressure may well up tears, cause instant anger, fear, anxiety and indeed a longing to stop whatever sexing is happening in that moment. Weather a woman feels this sort of pain or numbness while having the cervix massaged does not matter other then it shows that there is great healing of the cervix that needs to happen. Once a cervix is healthy and these negative traumatic blockages are released from the cellular tissue, a woman can experience endless, powerful, full body orgasms. The orgasms that come from the cervix are like no other, they carry with them a depth of soul, emotion and physical power that it is hard to describe. One must experience to understand.
Fact: In actuality, when most people talk about a vaginal orgasm, they are more specifically referring to a G-Spot orgasm.
For something so small, the G-spot has certainly managed to make its way to center stage in woman’s sexuality — and as with anything that is in the lime light it has stirred up more than its share of controversy. Some people don’t believe it exists at all, while others swear by its ability to produce unparalleled pleasure.
The G-Spot is a small area within the upper wall of the vagina, about one to two inches from the opening. With insertion of a finger you may feel this small area that has a rougher, almost chicken skin texture on the outer skin feel to it just past the urethral sponge. To assist you in finding it you can press with the inserted finger upward while connecting your thumb to the clitoris and acting as though you are pressing the two fingers together. Not all G-spots are in the exact same location however, somewhere within this region you will discover with present soft touching the G-spot. When a partner is looking for this spot pay close attention to your lover, she will certainly feel when you press on it. Some women have the ability to reach orgasm through direct stimulation of the G-Spot or gentle massage of the area. When the G-Spot is stimulated, the woman will often feel as if she has the urge to urinate. And, in fact, during a G-Spot orgasm, many women will mistakenly believe they have accidentally urinated. This is because a G-Spot orgasm is notable because it is usually accompanied by a lot of fluid. This is generally referred to as “female ejaculation.” Yet, the fluid is released from the urethral sponge area. When the G-spot is being massaged the sponge normally is massaged as well. Both of these areas can start out very small and even hard to find in some women, but once stimulated they can expand and grow to taking up a much larger part of the internal vaginal wall.
The same applies to the G-spot that was mentioned with cervix. When a woman has experienced traumatic experiences in her life time, may that be sexual abuse, abandonment, deep fears, loss of loved ones, physical/mental abuse, child birth or other events that can cause trauma to lock up in the cellular tissues, the G-spot as well as the Urethral sponge, cervix and/or clitoris can become overly sensitive and painful to the touch or dull and numb. Either of these reactions is a sign of needed healing and release of these stored traumas.
Once healed properly this elusive yet magical place in a woman’s body can bring great pleasure and fulfillment in lovemaking.
The clitoral orgasm is generally viewed as the easiest type of orgasm for a woman to achieve which is why it’s the fixation of both men and women in “getting her, her’s first” idea. Some women also deem it the most pleasurable, but other women who experience G-spot orgasm, cervical, or whole-body orgasm may disagree with that. In fact, many women believe that they are unable to achieve orgasm unless the clitoris is stimulated, even if this occurs only indirectly by way of friction from intercourse. However, this is often because, with most sexual encounters, women don’t get enough time to awaken their vaginas and the sensitive spots internally to experience orgasm through stimulation of them. If lovemaking was slowed down and extended long enough too really, REALLY arouse a woman before penetration, it is a safe to say that lots more women would be experiencing more than clitoral orgasm. As well as the healing needed that has been covered in other orgasm types. This too is the case with the clitoris. It is important to note that the clit can become over sensitive very easily and once this happens pleasure quickly becomes irritation and pain, killing a women’s hunger for sex. Similar to the tip of a man’s penis the clitoris can become desensitized as well. This happens from too much extended massaging or friction. Many women and men have been programmed to believe that rough is good on the clit, yet as with the case for everything, each woman’s clit is different. Not just different from other women but different in sensation moment to moment. It’s important to pay close attention and keep open communication flowing when in all of your sexing.
Even in self-pleasuring the majority of women focus on clitoral stimulation as to bring themselves to orgasm because they have learned that this is often the quickest and most effective route. However, the speed training of the body to expand into orgasm is not allowing for full sexuality to unfold and the liberation that can be experienced through orgasm is side stepped because we have lost an appreciation for slow, deep loving and sexing in our lives. Causing the majority of the relationship, emotional, and even psychological issues that many deal with today. This quick to orgasm societal habit that has formed contributes to anxiety, stress, depression, poor health and blocked trauma.
This orgasm is achieved by stimulating a small spot which contains sensitive erectile tissue directly above and on either side of the urethral opening.
To achieve orgasm here and heighten all sexual stimulation insert a single finger into the anal canal by about ½ to 1 inch, no deeper than your first knuckle. Then gently press this finger against a finger or two that has been inserted into the vagina at the same distance, begin gentle massaging while pressing these two areas together. Some women do enjoy full penetration anally, orgasm can achieved this way if a woman is first sexually stimulated and fully relaxed. She must trust her partner deeply so that her body can move past the initale discomfort and into the pleasure. Anal sexing is a slow moving, deeply emotional event and must be regarded with honor and care as to not further cause any trauma to the woman.
This orgasm is achieved by stimulating about ¾ of an inch deep in the front wall of the vagina. This area of the vagina is extremely sensitive and as blood rushes to it it becomes even more so. Often this area is over looked because penetration happens so quickly.
Deep Spot Orgasm
This area is located deep in the vagina just before the cervix. It is the deepest back wall of the vagina. This area may be numb or over sensitive if a woman has block trauma however. Massaging of this area and clearing at the cellular level can help induce powerful orgasms.
Some woman can reach orgasm by the stimulation of their breasts. Soft sensual touching, kissing, pinching and even a nursing action can bring some women to orgasm and is a great way to increase pleasure in foreplay or lovemaking. But again, watch for over stimulation.
Some women are extremely sensitive in their mouths can achieve orgasm while kissing or receiving/giving oral sex. The extra saliva formation that happens as arousal kicks up adds to the sensitive internal areas of the mouth as well as the lips. The direct mental link between mouth and genitals can be intense for some.
Some women can reach orgasm at the touch of their skin. Perhaps this is good reason many ancient sexual practices focus on massage and bodywork.
Some women can reach orgasm during auditory or visual stimulation, such as watching a movie, reading erotic literature or watching others having sex. This orgasm happens without any physical stimulation.
Two other BIG Orgasm Types for women that SHOULD NOT go unspoken of are Full Body and Emotional Orgasms. Both of these happen from a blending of the above mentioned orgasms and can only be achieved if sex is approached from a slow fashion and certain levels of healing has happened allowing for a woman to open into herself and trust in her partner to level needed that the orgasmic energy can dance throughout her chakra system and manifest as a full body or emotional orgasm.
The human body is a sexual pleasure machine, and the female body even more so than the male. That may seem surprising if your concept of someone’s ‘level of sexuality’ is determined by their ‘level of libido’. We’re rather too libido-oriented in this society. The general belief is that sex is a response to feeling horny. Along with that belief comes the implicit assumption that the hornier you feel, the better sex will be.
Since women have bought into this model and believe that they should be horny before they have sex, given that women’s sexuality isn’t the ‘gagging-for-it’ type: they tend to give up, they don’t do what it takes to get in the mood, generally thinking that there’s something wrong with them (if they’ve got low self-esteem) or claiming they’re ‘normal’, declaring that ‘women don’t like sex’ and their parter is ‘sex-crazed’ (if they’re more assertive).
It’s true that women tend to have libidos like men. Women’s sexuality is not hormonally driven, it’s contextual. It depends so much on how a woman is feeling and what’s going on for, that determnes if she’s open and receptive to sex, not necessarily ‘horny’.
Once a women allows herself to get into the mood, and approaches sex in a more female-friendly way (ie not trying to be like a man) – wow, the places she can go! Because when it comes to the response side of sex (as opposed to the desire side) – well, women are far more superior then men!
Women can have orgasms that are more intense, more frequent and last longer than men’s. On top of the standard clitoral orgasm, which is similar in physiology and feel to the male ejaculatory orgasm, women can have orgasms through vaginal stimulation, g-spot (actually the urethral sponge) stimulation, AFE-spot stimulation, cervical stimulation, anal stimulation, nipple stimulation, in fact, from virtually any part of their body, and even without physical touch (either by being in the presence of a man who’s very present in his masculinity, or by bringing yourself to orgasm through breath and visualisation). Women can have multiple orgasms, wet orgasms (more commonly known by the dreadful male-centric term: female ejaculation), full body orgasms, and can stay in ecstatic states of arousal for very long periods of time.
Unfortuantely, most people don’t even realise what women’s sexual potential is. After a few decades of wondering why women are so sexual dysfunctional because they don’t function sexually like men, Western scientific research is only now starting to acknowledge that women’s sexuality is different. But it’s still way off realising just how wonderfully different women’s sexuality is.
Fortunately some people (like me!) are exploring beyond the boring limits of conventional models of sex in the West, taking on board the wisdom of older sexual traditions, such as the Tantric and Taoist, and doing a lot of personal research: I know all this is possible because I experience it.
When women realise it’s possible, they can start to experience it. When women have sexual responses like this, when they go to heaven, they take their man their with them. There is nothing a man likes more than to give his women this level of sexual pleasure. It satisfies him to his very core. It makes him feel like a Real Man. He may not be able to experience the level of feeling that she can, but he can feel fantastic for getting her there.
Female sexual response is extraordinary. It takes a while to get there, but like all good things, it takes time. The more time and attention you pay to something, generally the better the outcome.
Throw away the limiting beliefs, expand your possibilities to so much more – open yourself up to your glorious potential!
Original Posting On The Tantra Fusion Blog
I’m worried about getting and maintaining my erections…
By Mare Simone, Advanced Certified Tantra Educator
Men become victims of the myth of the Perpetual Erection. It has always existed, but it’s become even more destructive because of the way in which the issue is treated in most pornography, which always features a purported Superman. That’s not reality. Often porn stars use Viagra or “fluffers”, women whose job it is to keep them aroused and hard for their performance.
It often seems as though performance anxiety and the pressure that goes along with it is the culprit that causes impotency and perpetuates it. Often I’ve found that when a man doesn’t put pressure on himself nor does his partner, the problem resolves itself, just being present and thoroughly enjoying the moment.
In Tantric sex, it’s not so important how hard your erection is, how long it lasts, or whether or not you are even hard at all.
Not only is it possible to have an orgasm without ejaculating, I have also known men who have had profound full body orgasms and multiples, without even being erect!
There are many other delightful ways that you can join with your partner to create great pleasures together, using your hands or mouth that don’t require an erection.
Tantria teaches you: how to channel your sexual energy throughout your entire body and to your partner’s body… How to have non-genital, full body orgasms…
How to enter into an exquisite spiritual/sexual state… to feel the energy flowing right through you, into your partner and back into you… creating a continuous stream of energy that flows between you. It’s incredibly satisfying! And you can do all this without necessarily having an erection.
Interestingly I have found that when sexual partners are not so concerned about whether the man has a full erection or not, the problem often ceases on its own, without needing to be fixed.
Taking the pressure off and not having to perform gives way for a deeper more gratifying experience of relaxed arousal and tremendous pleasure.
Mare Simone is an Advanced Certified Tantra Educator through the Source School of Tantra Yoga and lives in Southern California. She travels the world teaching Tantra. You can read more about her at www.maresimone.com.
Article Originally Posted on Source Tantra Blog
The immemorial interplay between wine and love – Oenos and Venus – tends to produce varying erotic emissions according to specific varietals. We can only speak of tendencies because there are no more certainties in the bedroom than there are in the bottle. Different palates perceive different flavors and complexities, just as they do in the wines themselves. Continue reading “An Exchange of Gourmet Fluids by Alexis Le Chin”