Do You Know Your Pleasure Threshold?

Do you know what your pleasure threshold is?
 
For years I had no clue what that even meant.
I did not think of life, let alone my goals in terms of pleasure.
I mean you live,
you struggle,
you captivate a few precious moments,
you love,
you loose,
and you put your head down and do what you need to do.
 
That is how I was raised.
I was raised to believe that you must put EVERYTHING in front of yourself,
and for sure not focus on what felt good or turned you on.
That way of living was for whores, addicts and the not so responsible people who were selfish and immature.
 
Fast forward through a 20 year marriage,
the loss of houses, jobs and a bunch of debt,
the raising of at that time five children,
then a divorce,
a new relationship plus two more babies plus a bunch of other struggles and more stress,
and you find me believing another way.
 
That idea of pleasure is something now that I realize is a more accurate way of living and it is what God actually intended for us to live in.
 
Not the saga of suffering and loss.
Not the not having of our dreams and desires.
 
When we study the quantum field,
we learn that life moves with ease.
It is about getting into the flow of life,
the flow of soul.
And we do this with this thing called pleasure.
When we are allowing ourselves to receive pleasure we increase our vibration and we open up to the potential of miracles.
 
You have to realize that what you want, wants you too.
But it will not change it’s vibration to get you.
That is what your work is.
To increase your vibration and allow life to serve up your dreams to you.
AKA SOUL GOALS.
 
Think about it…
 
When you feel passionate about something,
when you feel those butterflies in your tummy,
when you feel turned on by something,
you are craving it.
But what are you actually craving?
 
Is it, it or is it the pleasure that it provides you?
 
It’s the pleasure baby.
You want whatever you want for how it makes you feel.
The feeling of something is the ONLY reason we go after it.
 
And what we are wanting is happiness.
Connection. Love. Intimacy. Joy.
 
All of these things equal pleasure.
It’s a different sort of pleasure though,
its SOUL based.
 
It comes from our SOUL not from the EGO.
The ego wants to experience pleasure to hide us from our truth and power.
The ego wants to enjoy pleasure to mask our short falls instead of focus us on our path.
The ego uses negative forms,
very 2D-3D forms of pleasure to derail us from success.
 
But why would the ego do this you may wonder?
 
Ego is trying to protect us.
It does have a purpose.
And that is a purpose of protection,
it is fear based.
And anything that is based in fear is not from the SOUL,
and not from God/Universe.
It is out of flow and it is a low vibration.
 
The ego does what it does because it fears change.
Change means transformation.
Change means expansion.
Change means growth.
And change can mean increased vibration.
 
But as your vibration grow’s so does your determination to remain in this thing called flow.
 
Because is FEELS SO DAMN GOOD.
And miracles happen here.
 
You think about something,
you feel how good it is,
you focus in on gratitude for being already in the flow that you are and BAM! you are given more to support that feeling.
 
But here is the thing that YOU MUST understand BABY.
 
And I want you to really pay attention to this.
 
Your goals can only manifest up to your pleasure threshold.
 
So if you are not yet manifesting like MOFO BOSS,
then look at how much pleasure you are allowing into your life experience.
 
Look at where you are denying yourself the simple joys,
where are you holding yourself back by continuing to buy into the bullsh*t concept that you are to suffer for a time frame in order to achieve your dreams.
 
You will be required to step the f-ck out of your comfort zone.
You will be required to make changes.
To transform and level up.
You will be required to break old habits and beliefs.
You will never be able to achieve that desired life you want in the same old shoes you have been walking this path so far.
 
And that will most likely scare the sh*t out of you BABY.
It may even feel too difficult.
It may even feel bad at points,
and you may “think” that is its painful to make these changes and build these muscles.
 
But if you don’t do the inner training,
if you don’t look into those shadows of self,
if you don’t learn to level up and get into flow,
then you cannot have what you want with ease.
 
You will STRUGGLE or you will SETTLE.
 
Either way it will not be in PLEASURE.
And that threshold will hold right where it is or even shrink.
 
The choice though is always yours.
I know that you are worthy of your dreams and living a high vibe pleasure threshold.
 
God does not make unworthy things.
and YOU BABY, are WORTHY.
 
Level Up Your Pleasure Threshold – Level Up Your Life.
 
And As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
 

Warrior of the Goddesses Heart

I know what I want.
I know my desire.
I feel my heart yearning.
Calling for me to breathe,
breathe life back into it.
To not fear love.
Or to be loved.
To not belittle love,
offered at my doorway.

I hear my lovers words,
the sweetness they make,
the commitment they stand before,
the desire that erupts in them,
and the love.
The love that they are carried on.

I hear him share his heart,
I feel his soul hold space,
for me as I share in return.
I share my fear.
I share my struggle,
I share my desire.
And I want to run.

Can he be the one that can hold me?
Is he willing to really love me?
Or will he crumble
from my weight,
the weight of who I am
and all I want to become.

His words are nothing new to my ears.
Unfortunate tales that many a sailor in my feminine currents have sung before him.

They all long to be the one.
They long to capture my heart.

They enjoy my body,
they are intrigued by my mind,
they get lifted by my spirit,
but they know that the true battle,
the crusade is for my heart.

And it is a heart that has been scorned,
a heart that has been tossed away as it opened deeper.

My lover looks at me with loving eyes,
he aims to penetrate my soul,
he desires for me to feel his commitment,
his certainty,
he is confident that he can hold me
and dance in my fire.

His voice echos words of my past loves.
He shares he does not want me to change.
He does not want to control me.
That he,
yes he can love me and I am not to much.

I feel his heart,
I hear his belief,
but these words are easy to say,
while you sit by the fire and get caught up in its mystery.
What will he do when my fire escapes its container?
What will he do when it desires to over take his heart?
When it burns,
burns in its glory,
in its beauty.

Sure he will enjoy its dance,
but will he be able to handle it being ignited?

Through time and space we dance,
we open and close.
I look away but for a second,
as I sense him leaning in.
My soul wants to be taken.
My heart wants to be penetrated.
But alas,
the fear conquers them.
It masks the emotions that beg to be seen,
and it makes me retreat.

Retreat once again,
I will.
Back into my lonely cave.
Where I feel safe.
Safe in my not having.
Safe in my not being seen,
if even for a bit longer.
Yet he still see’s me.
And I know this.
He leans in further,
his lips softly open,
he asks for a kiss.

My heart shakes,
it rumbles in fear and excitement.
For all it ever wants,
wants to be chased,
wants to be desired,
wants to be opened,
wants to not be given up on.

In its wanting,
he steps a bit further into the fire,
and proclaims his presence.
Asking for my depth.
Asking for my emotion.
Asking for my fire.

And so it is,
that I breathe in.
Just one breath,
just one perhaps.

And answer him in the only way I can,
in this moment.
This perfect moment of our lives.

“As you wish.”
Comes from my lips as we meet once again.

————————–————————–

To all those who have loved and lost,
loved deeper than they can ever share,
who have tasted true love and will never settle for anything less than.

To all those who have stood in the goddesses fire,
who have been burned, who have been mesmerized by its flames and desired to conquer it.

To all those who want to feel its ignition,
who believe that they can hold it.
And dance with it.

Much love to you this day.
Open yourselves to love,
as it is what makes you feel alive.
It births your soul into all it desires,
all it needs and can be.

And let yourself be seen.

As always,
Stop Existing & Start Living

 

The Goddesses Dragon – My Tale of Surrender to the Masculine

He wants my surrender.
I can feel it at my greatest depths.

He wants me fully.
Open and inviting to his everything.
He wants my surrender,
and he is willing to work for it.
He is willing to take the journey into the depths of my being,
where he will uncover my hidden treasures,
which I fear may seem like dragons,
yet he assures me in his holding,
that he does not want to slay my dragons,
he only want to bask in their beauty,
he wants to sit with them in moments of stillness,
and he wants to just take them in.

He wants to see their beauty,
that beauty that only a deep understanding of love can handle,
that beauty that is so revealing of the soul.
Most are not strong enough within themselves to face this beauty,
this light,
this power,
the dragon.

Most fear being devoured by it.
What they begin in the courting process admiring from a afar,
they end with wanting to own and control.
Because it scares them.
It is wild,
it is fierce,
it is powerful beyond measure,
and desires to conquer the hearts of its admirers.

Few are able to hold themselves,
within the presence of this beast.

But, every now and then,
a gentleman comes about,
makes himself known,
and smiles in the presence of the magic he has found in caverns of the goddess.

And this gentleman,
this gentleman,
ignites the goddesses soul.
Sets it on fire.

And she desires to dance for him.
She desires to open herself for him,
and let him in.

Yet she is scared beyond measure,
her past tells of beautiful love saga’s,
intense love and loss.
She is fearful to become vulnerable with this man.
Because of the pain,
the pain that her heart will endure.
Yet she desires it all.
The love and depth,
are worth the pain.
Are worth the standing before her own dragon,
and smiling within its flames.

She know’s that this man,
is rare, and unique.
That he is one who can hold her fire.
At least for a time.
And she wants to surrender.
She craves the intimacy.
She craves the revealing.
She craves the integrity.
And the opening.

Physically.
Mentally.
Emotionally.

She leans in.
And she drops into his arms,
resting in his strength.
Resting in his admiration.
She let’s her emotions be seen.
She laughs,
she cries,
and she opens a bit more.

This cavern is deep.
And she realizes,
that her dragon is not to be feared.

She now understands what this gentleman has known,
the fire of her dragon will not harm when lifted in love,
it will only light the way to more caverns for them to explore.

Explore together.
The depths of their souls.

And so she looks at the gentleman,
with tears streaming from her eye’s,
and she say’s yes to the opening.

They lay together, enwrapped in the moment,
and they smile.

Blessed be to all of you who read this and venture into the depths of the goddesses caverns with hearts on fire,
and souls ignited.

Be wise in your journey and know that the dragon is there to protect the goddess from those that are unworthy,
and there to guild those who are,
into her surrender.

As always,
Stop Existing & Start Living

For more coaching, truth shares and awakened education join me for 1+1 coaching via phone, zoom or in person. Or follow me on Facebook for my morning FREE Conscious Coffee Broadcasts where I share truth bombs and alignment asskickery.

Shaky Knee’s & Stairs

Shaky Knee’s and Stairs.

These two things do not get along well.
And yest they are a match made in heaven.

Looking down from the second floor stairs,
Looking at that first step,
feeling my knee’s tremble at the core.
The energy pulsing from my core.
The cool night breeze, brushing up against my cheek as I took a deep breath in.
My lover behind me.

My knee’s.
My knee’s, shaking from the hours upon hours of pleasure.
Quivering from the core.
My core.

There is this fullness,
This feeling of alignment,
yet fear still resides here.
I can feel it being shaken loose.

That first step,
seeming so far away.
The uncertain feeling of can I make it?
The knowing that it is one of many to follow.

I am tired.
I am so tired.
I am turned on .
So turned on.
I want more.
So much more.

But FIRST, 
that step.

That first step.
Why is it so hard to land that first step.
To find the courage to JUST TAKE IT.

It’s fear.
It’s uncertainty.
It’s lack of faith.
It’s lack of belief in my worthiness.

and

YET, I KNOW that I can land it.
There is this knowing that is deeper than the fear.

This knowing that wants to be known.
It wants to be REMEMBERED.

It is there begging for my attention.
Begging for me to STOP existing in the shadows of what I can be.

It is that quiet voice that is getting loud as the day’s pass.
Saying, “YES YOU CAN.”

But these knee’s…
These shaky knee’s.

They tremble at all that could happen.
They resist the wonders that could be born from the pleasure of saying YES to myself.
They resist the DESIRE that wants to JUST LET GO.
They tremble in fear that something may happen to this me that I know, as the me that I am to be EMERGES.

You would think that hours of pleasure would grant me the confidence to just land the step.
You would think that hours of embracing what I wanted, would give me the faith that I could take the step and KNOW I have it.
You would think that the surrender to success, the depth of orgasmic bliss that I said YES to would show me that this world is for the taking, it is for the embracing and it supports our TRUTH when we lean in, let go and get in flow.

But every moment, I have come to learn is a new moment.
And every moment carries hope and doubt.

It is up to me in this moment to DECIDE, 
To CLAIM what I want to do with it.

It is up to me, and only me to TAKE THE STEP.

Will I let these shaky knee’s lock me up in fear?
Or will I let these shaky knee’s rattle out that fear as I step forward in FAITH?

Yes there are many steps before me.
There is risk,
But my lover is behind me.
His love carries me.

The step’s are suddenly not so steep.
The breeze, it brushes up against my cheek like a lover itself whispering his intentions in my ear.
The night sky, filled with his glory.
Like a lover filling me with his essence in climax.
There is a owl in the distance,
I hear it’s call of the night.
As if to say, “Listen to your soul, my child.”

And so I shall!
I shall LISTEN.
I shall TAKE THE STEP.
In FAITH.
In CERTAINTY.

Here is my courage.
Here is my guidance.
Here, here in this moment of leaving my lovers embrace, I open to true surrender. True guidance.
My angels are around me.

It is TIME.

Step.
Step.
Step.

Ahhhhhhhh…….
The feeling of saying YES, to one’s truth.
It is FREEDOM.

It is bliss.
It is the F*ck YES! Life.

Will you say YES?

And remember, 
Stop Existing & Start Living

Join Kendal TODAY for a F*ck Yes Life experience. Limited time access to 1:1 coaching and online coaching programs to help you master your FREEDOM based life NOW.

It’s F*cking Hard to Surrender.

It’s f*cking hard to surrender. And that’s exactly the problem that we all have.

We want the orgasm.

We want the connection.

We want the effing firework’s.

But we won’t just allow surrender to over take us and just blow our f*cking mind.

You know it’s true!

If your like many people, just reading the word surrender had you go into some sort of convulsions and excuses in your body. Maybe you said, ” I surrender all the time. I know how to go with the flow and just be.” Or maybe you felt some constriction in your chest, back or stomach. Maybe, just maybe you simply shook your head and said, “yep! that’s right, surrender is f*cking hard.”  No matter what your response was as you read the title to this musing, you know its right.

Surrender is f*cking hard.

Why?

Because it’s scary as shit, that’s why.

Let me share a small tale with you and sorta tattle on myself in the process.

In recent month’s I have been struggling with surrender. I know how to and I can do it damn good and pleasurably as well too. I fully understand the blessings that I will reap if I just let go and surrender however, since about last July I have been stuck in what one may call a holding pattern. Just trying to maintain my energy, my emotions, and carry on as things sort themselves out. The issue with this holding pattern that quickly became a habit was that it had me locking down all my emotions and feeling. It had me restricting myself from fully embracing life in all ways.

You see when we restrict ourselves from surrendering to life and living faith based, even if it appears that we are only doing so in this aspect of our life and not over there or there, we are in fact limiting the supply of blessings and preventing the fullness of our dynamic ability to connect to God.  You don’t get to say, ” I am not going to feel that, but I will feel this fully.” No, the universe does not operate like that. If you want to experience the highs of life and all the joy, bliss and beauty, then you have to be willing to experience and learn from the contrasting feelings and emotions that life offers up as well.

After all you and I are not here for life results. We are here for life experience.

You don’t get to take all the shit you gather up here with you. You get to take with you the emotion, the memory, and the experience of this life.

That’s it.

Your fancy car’s, houses and wardrobe won’t do you a damn bit of good in the after life. Neither will being the most responsible, dutiful citizen. Sure these are all wonderful things, and certainly make life more enjoyable and pleasant, but the reality is that ultimately THAT’S NOT WHAT YOU ARE HERE FOR!

You are here to learn to connect.

Yes that is what you are here for. What I am here for and everyone else.

It is that simple.

No matter what your faith or religion is, the truth is still the same.

Connection is ALL THAT MATTERS.

Think about it. What are we searching for when we are “looking for God,” or sitting in silence to pray or meditate? What are we wanting when we read scripture and ask for guidance from God?

Connection.

Connection to God.

Connection to something greater than self.

Connection to ourselves.

Connection to others.

Without connection, no other goal matters, because if we are not leaning in and surrendering to God’s love and direction by becoming the witness within ourselves and embracing our own love for self as well as the love that is given FREELY by God/Universe then we can NEVER achieve any of our dreams, goals or desires long term.

We may get a taste of them for a fleeting moment but without the full embrace of our worthiness of receiving them and this means SURRENDERING to what our spirit knows at its core and living from our truth instead of this fictitious mask that we all love to try and play some role in, then we will never truly be blessed with all that is stored up in heaven for us and is right here waiting to be enjoyed in this lifetime.

Yet, here we are still arguing in so many ways about why we cannot or should not surrender.

Maybe it’s trust issues.

Maybe it’s a belief that you cannot have what you are desiring.

Maybe you are fearful of being abandoned by whomever or even God if you just get the f*ck out of your head and allow yourself to drop down into your body.

Maybe you are scared you will be too much, show to much or even that you may enjoy it to much.

Who the effing cares what the reason is that you are choosing NOT to surrender to your greatest and highest orgasmic life, the fact is that I am willing to wager that you are NOT!

Unless you can sit there and say, “Kendal, my life is so amazing, I cannot imagine anything being better. I have all my life in perfect order, I am living on purpose and am a total F*ck YES! to every day.  I have all the abundance and well-being that I could ever desire.” And here is the kicker to that statement, you may say, yeah Kendal, that’s right and I am damn good at surrender.

Well, what does you life picture show?

Is that true?

What would your spouse, lover, friend, or family say?

No?

I admitted a bit ago that I have been having surrender issues since back in July.  The rest of the story is pretty simple.

There was this boy and this girl and they were fiercely in love, until one day when one of them was not. That day the world came to a STOP for the girl and her surrender give a shit button BROKE. Try as hard as she might to recover it from the damage that it under took, she found herself running from the pain her heart felt and the anger it held.  She shut that shit down, because it was not good or productive and she focused in on the blessings in her life. She focused in on what she could CONTROL and dedicated herself to family and career.

Month’s passed and the girl tried repeatedly to pull that band aid off her bleeding heart and just surrender to life again and have faith that things would get better. That it was okay for her to open herself up and feel connection to someone again other than her family. Day after day, she tried everything possible, but always came back with the same result, a meh experience.

Almost hopeless, she decided that she had no choice but to just allow and see what would happen. Because in all of her trying she was actually pushing herself away from the thing that she desired so much. Her focus and dedication to “make it happen,” was creating resistance to surrender and preventing her from enjoying the rapture of connection, joy, and orgasm that was being presented to her repeatedly.

But then it happened!

Just like that, she had broken to a point where she no longer had the strength to hold the resistance and try and force something to happen.

There she lay, under her new lovers body, his focus completely present with her. Penetrating her not just to fantastic physical levels of depth, but as well to her heart and soul. Stroke after stroke, he lead her to go deeper inside herself where she had no choice but to meet up with her heart and just experience what it had to offer in this orgasmic surrender. The physical feelings were lovely and deep, but the emotional sensation brought tears to her eyes and as she found herself trying to hold them back, she could now feel her own resistance to her surrender heavy on her chest and tight in her pussy.

Here was the threshold that no one could carry her across but herself.  Here, she had to make a choice and either stand strong in her resistance to receive or open and surrender her physical body more so that her emotional, mental and spiritual bodies could be penetrated and carried to the alter of God once again.

Her choice was a most delicious one.

A life altering one.

She chose to go deeper.

She chose to lean into love.

Lean into her orgasm, her abundance, her radiance.

She chose to STOP Surviving & Start Living.

What will you choose?

Why You Need To STOP Following Me…NOW!

I am writing this to invite you to STOP following me.

To unsubscribe from my newsletter, my Facebook and anywhere else that you may be checking in on my work.

YES, I am inviting you to say GOOD BYE Kendal.

Here is why.

2018 is a year of you could say transformation, but in truth it is a year of me saying YES to my AUTHENTIC SELF and my desire to be a crusader. My burning passion to speak the words that I have been holding back for my entire life that NOW want to be birthed from my lips and my finger tips. It is a year where you will see me make harsh but loving statements that may push you far past your comfort zones and even giving me the middle finger.

It is a year where you may say, “ OMG! Kendal went and got saved!” – LOL

And perhaps I did.

Or perhaps the possibility is that I am just choosing to allow 2018 to be the year that I STOP standing in the shadow of shame around my spiritual beliefs and desires and what I have come to learn from walking a path of CERTAINTY and opening to the blessings that are all around.

Perhaps, the possibility of 2018 is that my soul can no longer sit still and be quiet and give what society and many of my readers and followers “think” they need or want, where the focus is on sex and how best to stroke a clit or a cock.

Because ANYONE who has ever coached with me or worked with me in any capacity can bear testimony that my teachings are 98% based in CONSCIOUSNESS training NOT sexual skills. 

 

Here is the thing, no matter what title I give myself, I coach the same. I speak the same. I praise the same. I work on the same issues, the same blockages, the same fear based thinking and habits that DESTROY your relationships, your intimacy, your sex, your ability to experience abundance, peace, joy, connection, health and vitality. NONE of this is changing, because it is my calling to help restore consciousness and connection between humankind and the creator ( whatever name you use). The principles and soul technology that I coach on remain the same. It has always been and always will be at the core of what I do and how I live my own life. 

The difference and the REASON you need to STOP FOLLOWING me now, is because I am going to be a base ball bat.

I am NOT going to apologize for stating things the way I know them.

I am NOT going to hold back any longer.

I am NOT going to cower in the ego based fear of how you may receive me or not.

I am NOT going to allow the programs that many of us subscribe too, conquer me another day around how I should look, act, speak, teach,  or coach.

So here is the thing…

IF YOU CHOOSE, to keep following me, you may grow even more discontent with your life and what you have CHOSEN to SETTLE for.

You may get very mad at my emails, my video’s, my conscious coffee’s, my articles, courses, workshops and talks.

You may start to ask yourself tough questions, such as, Why am I not happy?” – ” Why do I never feel truly connected, seen or loved?” – ” What am I really searching for?” – ” Why does my life feel like a chore?” and “Is this really all there is?”

You may start to observe things from a deeper state of calm, where the mind chatter starts to be put to bay.

You may start to truly feel life and yourself.

You may discover an orgasmic life, where you cannot help but smile from the joy coming from deep within.

You may start loving yourself.  Forgive yourself and others.

You may awaken your compassionate heart.

You may actually start seeing the MAGIC in your daily life and OMG! You may actually EXPECT miracles to occur on a regular basis.

You may start living  instead of just existing.

You may awaken one morning and say, ” It is TIME. Time for a change. Time to open. Time to love again. Time to STOP FEARING.” 

Yes, you may do these things, but they will come with the price of having your ego pushed around. Your stubborn thinking patterns rearranged and the mental masturbation practices that you have grown so comfortable with as your truth and logic stripped down to what they really are: ILLUSION.

You see, I am trying to SAVE YOU the heartache of following me any longer. Why fill the space in your email, or on this screen with words that will cause you to QUESTION your reality. Your Thinking. Your heart. Your trust in something greater than yourself.

Why follow someone who believes so strongly in this mission, ” Be the change you wish to see in the world.”

Why continue to follow someone who BELIEVES YOU, yes you, deserve GREATNESS.

That is  your natural state of being and that God desires nothing more than to grant it to you.

But FIRST….

You must say GOODBYE.

Goodbye to ego.

Good bye to fear.

Goodbye to doubt.

Goodbye to those things that hold you back.

Goodbye to your disbelief that God wants you to be HAPPY and have what you desire most.

And that maybe your DESIRE,  to JUST be AVERAGE and just get through the next day.

So in that case you may need to say goodbye Kendal….

Because, I want to THRIVE!

I want to call down my blessings. And every day, I am granted the beauty of magical experiences, beautiful people and opportunities. Many reasons to smile. And even more reasons to share my joy. My faith, my life work, my heart and my soul. 

Will you stay or will you go?

I cannot say.

You have free will.

Choose NOW. Because NOW is all you have, all you will ever have. Do not build your life of fear of tomorrow, but on the blessing of TODAY.

STOP Existing – START Living, This coaching is for Grown A*s Believers.

Touched By Heaven in the Chilliest of Hours

2017-12-02 07.05.49

The weather has certainly changed here in North Texas. On my 6:45-am walks the bitter cold seem’s to go through all my layers of clothes. The chill of the morning breeze feels fresh though and after breaking into the day with a prayer of gratitude and my morning 6-AM Facebook Live session of Conscious Coffee for about 20 to 30 minutes every day I am pumped and ready to get my heart rate up as I listen to an hour of power motivational education and then end with one of my favorite up beat songs as I find myself skipping home.

But then again, how can one NOT be pumped about life and where they are headed when they have a great expectation for the blessings that are but right before them?

The other morning half way through my walk during my 15 minutes of power yoga on the hillside I found myself viewing the beauty of nature. The sunrise (see picture in this note here) was simply amazing. I could in this moment find myself singing the lyrics to the song, Testify by NeedtoBreathe….

There’s no denying beauty makes a sound
We can’t escape it
There’s no way to doubt
Mist on the mountain rising all around
Give me your heart give me your song
Sing it with all your might
Come to the fountain and
You can be satisfied
There is a peace, there is a love
You can get lost inside
Come to the fountain and
Let me hear you testify

I was thinking as I kneeled into pigeon pose staring at the sunrise that I was truly in gratitude for all the tests of my last year. All the the sorrow, pain, and frustration was actually the foundation for a great testimony. I could hear Les Brown saying, “With no test there is no testimony.”

My heart soared with not just gratitude at the comfort that came down on me in this moment but I found myself feeling like a small child who was anxiously awaiting Christmas morning but not truly understanding when Christmas was coming. Just a knowing that it was coming. This knowing filled me to my soul and I could not help but smile.

Looking back over the last year to 18 months I can almost see the path from heavens eyes and how things have been at play long before I caught on. I can now see how things that in the moment felt miserable were actually setting the stage and clearing out what was needed to free me into what my true desires are and always have been.

I have had moments of doubt creep in on my being and set me back here and there, but they last for just a flicker in time. The universe always has a way of speaking its commitment to me, its love for me and its backing of my desires. I have said many a time that I am a deeply spiritual person who believes that God is always present and communicating. It is us who choose not to listen.Not because we don’t want to hear the messages but because we are not yet ready to handle the blessings. We must grow our vessel you could say to the capacity to actually hold the blessings so that we don’t loose what is given.

Here is where what we humans perceive as suffering comes in.

Suffering is in our lives to bring us awareness that we are not in alignment to our desires. Suffering teaches us the most valuable lesson. The lesson of letting go of our ego’s need to try and control, even the hands of God, and instead open to surrender through love, gratitude, forgiveness and AWARENESS.

If we want something we must first become aware of how we are blocking our blessings.

Often they sit right in front of us and it is like we have a heavy cloak over our heads so that we do not see them as we stubble and turn away, fearing that God is not there. Fearing that we are not worthy. Fearing that this presence of a creator that has been so highly spoken of and taught about is nothing more than a fairy tale.

In our fear we place dead lines and we try and force the GPS system of the Divine to take the course that we believe is best for us instead of moving forward in courageous certainty and love.

However, every now and then someone stops FEARING the “What If’s” and the “Yeah But’s…” and just Let’s Go and Follows.

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It is this sort of moment, you find yourself on a crisp morning in pigeon pose on a damp grassy knoll, staring up at the sunrise and see a rainbow beaming from behind the clouds. The cool breeze of the winter morning no longer chilling but instead invigorating and joy beaming from the depth of your soul.

In moments like this you STOP your own self-inflicted crucification of pain and not receiving and open your arms to all that is to come…

Open your arms to the KNOWING!

Will You Open Up To Your Blessings for Now and 2018?

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Are You A Fuck Yes to Your Full Potential?

“The ONLY place you need to be – is in your magic zone. We all have a magic zone. We all use our zone. All the time. The trick is being conscious to what we are creating and making sure that our magic zone is being used for all the bliss, joy, play and abundance it was intended instead of the suffering, fear, destruction and chaos so many of us choose to use it for. — What are you creating?” – KW

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Be Your Full Potential This Coming Year!

Here we sit yet once again at the end of one year and the ushering into another. You would think that the whole world would be truly celebrating that we as a world society get to move forward into the next arena of life on this planet. You would think that each and every soul on this planet including yourself would be ecstatic with joy and hope for the new year and all it has to offer. After all new years is all about getting a fresh start. Having learned what we needed from the past year we can now move forward with an excitement and expectation of greatness. However it is more common for for us to be experiencing pain, suffering, fear, anger, remorse and almost a desire for this time to not move forward but to somehow reset to the beginning of the current year so that we can travel through it with 20/20 vision and make different choices, see things differently, and act differently.

For more than 80%of the population we may have a desire to make this new year one of all our dreams coming true, or at very least sticking to most of our goals and making some positive life changes so that we can feel accomplished at the end of the day and year. We desire that the feelings we are having and trying to ignore through too much alcohol, food, partying and random excessive entertainment with games and television, we desire not to ignore these feelings but to simply NOT have them to begin with. Therefore we desire CHANGE. Transformation.

There are so many people in my life that I know are experiencing these sensations. I have seen people go through divorce this years end, have been served papers for it or finished a long process with it. Many uncertain as to the standings of their relationship status. I have seen many people loose their jobs, their homes, cars. Not have enough food on their tables for nightly dinner. There are many who I know who are dealing with death this season in one way or another and even some that have been diagnosed with a terminal illness and find themselves feeling like they NOW don’t have the time to give and share all that they thought they were going to be able too. I have seen people question their purpose all year long. I have seen people try and make their purpose their relationship. I have seen people dig and get mad to the point of quitting because they have no clue what to do with what is surfacing and they have no idea how the things coming up serve them healing what they had originally set out to work on.

I have also seen many people discover love. Purpose. Direction.

Everything that I have seen has NOTHING to do with what we choose to typically focus on at this time of the year. That being how many presents we got or gave, or the deal we got or even the president of the USA. None of the things that truly matter are the things that our media or lifestyles has us focusing on.

The things that matter are REALLY SIMPLE.

The bottom line for every human being is the same.

We ALL WANT HAPPINESS.

Everything that we do is an attempt to achieve this sensation.

We change or stay in a relationship because we hope it will make us happy.

We keep a job or strive for a new one because we hope it will lead to happiness.

We exercise and change what our diets are to loose weight or firm up our bodies, not because we truly care what we look like, but because we are hoping that the look and feeling of our bodies will make us happy in some way.

We learn new things to bring more joy into our lives. Weather that is through experience or money.

We offer our helping hand not because we truly believe that it is needed, wanted or should happen (although we convince ourselves of this) but because we hope that in our pursuit to be a “good person” that we will be happier.

EVERYTHING – everything, that we do is about OUR happiness.

So why is it so damn fucking hard to actually do the things that will truly make us happy and give us ever lasting change and the creation of our FUCK YES LIFE?

Why do we choose to find excuses as to not do the things and get the help that we need in life to make the life that we desire?

You know it is said that if you desire something, that the thing desires you as well. In other words, the things we crave at our soul level are calling to us and asking us to do the things that we need to do to grow ourselves and create the consciousness required to connect to our desires.

Each and everyone of us has a the same ability to make the choices that we need to make for ourselves to create the life that we want for this coming New Year.

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The only real question’s you need to ask yourself are these:

What are your top 1-3 areas of change/transformation that you know you need or want to work on in this new year?
What is the long term impact of not making these changes?
If things stay the same what does it mean to you and what does it look like?
What is different NOW compared to 6 months, a year ago, five years ago?
What is your commitment level to yourself to make these changes?

What is the ONE thing you need to do in life to die happy?

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Make this year a year of your full potential.

You deserve your greatness to be revealed.

It is truly fucking time to STOP playing small!

Our world needs YOU!

I can tell you that the world needs more men, women, couple’s turned on, vibrant, living on purpose and by their desires.

The world needs people who are transforming the world through their passion for life. This is ONLY done through opening up NOT to more work – but more PLAY.

More PLEASURE.

The ONLY secret you ever need learn to have the life that you know you deserve and desire is the lesson to ALLOW YOUR OWN PLEASURE.

We have had our ability to receive pleasure in all forms taught right out of us. Our world is so focused on living by scarcity and taunt economics. No great thing every happened without allowing for some deliberate slack. In the slack we prevent the hyperactivity of our minds, energy and drive. In hyperactivity we loose fun, pleasure and joy. Everything becomes work and we cannot breathe or flow.

When we embrace that “slack” equals room to change. Room to grow. To create. We then open the doorway to the creation of our desires.

We gain compassion, understanding, direction.

There most certainly is an art to living in your bliss. But it is a most delicious process. And for those of us who choose to transform our lives and therefore the lives of all on this planet through pleasure, play and happiness we KNOW that it is a venture well worth moving into.

But it requires Your ALL.

Are you ready to make this a year of your full potential?
Are your ready t o have the Fuck YES Life you deserve?
Are you ready to live out the year having the relationships, the sex, the money, the career, the travel, the health that you want?

This and MORE is possible.

Take my hand and take the plunge into your GREATNESS!

jamaica3

Email me about being in the Pre-launch group for my New Fuck Yes to Life Coaching – and discover the top 10 focuses you need to play with to have the life you desire in 2017!!! DON’T Wait. The Pre- launch pricing will only be offered to the first 50 people who si

Orgasmic Womb-man Hood

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“When I gave birth, that was the first time I truly let go and surrendered. And it taught me how amazing that feels. Giving birth made me realize the power of being a woman. I have so much more substance in my life.” – Beyonce

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Orgasmic Womb-man Hood one of the most divine blessing that the feminine has been bestowed and yet we have been programmed to believe that these deeply spiritual and even orgasmic events in our lives are horribly painful and that we should not surrender ourselves to them but instead block these precious orgasmic moments of life transformation with anesthesia or short-circuit the whole event and have a C-section. This naked musing is posing the question to all women and men who dare to consider another side to the Miracle of Life. And in the questioning of the possibility of orgasmic birth we may also discover a different take on pain and suffering in our lives in general.

In pain you will give birth to children so claims the Holy Bible. But does that make it so? According to many for hundreds of years, yes it does. The bible said and therefore it is. But then why can over 21% of women surveyed say that they actually experienced orgasm during birth?

Being a mother, myself and having experienced labor five times and soon to be six, I can say that suffering and pain are not always there. At least not in the way that we perceive them and truthfully the lesson here is just that. Our expectations change the way pain is perceived.

Pregnant Mother Nature 019When we look at the orgasmic gift of birth we will discover that the same organs that are stimulated during sexual orgasm are also being stimulated during labor. As Christane Northrup, M.D. author of Women’s Bodies, Women’s Wisdom has said, “The molecules of nature’s ecstasy are released in high quantities during labor.” Therefore it is simply science that a woman can have an orgasm during child birth and many women today are looking at possible ways to increase their chances of doing just this. I am one of them!

In my previous labors I did indeed feel pain, however I never experienced the sort of trauma that Hollywood would have us believe it is. Unfortunately for many women that I know they did not have the same more pleasurable experiences that I had. There is a lot that goes into it though and much like in other areas of life when we expect to experience pain we tense our muscles and our stress levels go up, causing our pain to increase.  But what if we actually learned how to surrender to this state of human experience?

What if we actually found romance and a sensual aspect to the painful events that all human beings must and do live through? What if instead of dreading pain and KNOWING that we were going to suffer, we decided to lose our fear and inhabitations and move toward the pain?

On the other side of ALL pain in our human experience is human ecstasy.  But we can only experience these points of high yummienessPregnant Mother Nature 078 if we are willing to surrender fully into it and transform the pain into sensational life energy.  When we surrender and give permission to those we are with to also surrender with us into our humanness we open the doorway to Orgasm. Weather it is in laboring a baby, a business, a divorce, or something else we step into our manifestional vortex of transformation through the power of surrender.

The SAME surrender needed to experience ORGASM!

A key note to this process that is among one of the most difficult for our society today, is to NOT medicate, mask, block or numb the pain of experience. In today’s world we are constantly being fed someway to “prevent” or “stop” painful events. We are told that we should want the highs in life but not the low’s and in order to achieve this we can pop a pill, have a drink, veg out to our favorite numbing event, or discharge our stress energy through unconscious sex or over indulging in some other way. All of these “anesthesia of physical experience” do nothing more than cause harm. They do not provide more highs and less low’s, they bring us to ground NUMB.

But when we look out into this world what do we see?

Zombies.

Pregnant Mother Nature 051Our world is a waste land of human zombies. We are plagued by a sexually repressed culture.  One where more and more people are turning inward and shutting down. Depression, anxiety, sexual issues, mental illness, anger, fatigue, and dis-ease are all at an all time high. More and more cases of people suffering from being bipolar, ADD, ADHD, and stress induced illnesses are being reported.  Sexual crimes and abuse in many fashions are also growing at phenomenal rates. This is what “Lost” looks like. This is what “numb” looks like.

Most people never tap into and harness their greatest resources: their “procreative” life force energy which can give increased energy, mental clarity, creativity and fulfillment in our lives. It is this same energy that a woman can tap into during labor and transform her pain into Orgasm. It is this divine energy that can catapult our world and heal us at levels that traditional medicine and therapy cannot even perceive. Rapidly too!

So how do more women experience Orgasmic Womb-man hood?

How do more people in general embrace this powerful liberating force and stop the insanity of being a zombie?

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We have to learn how to surrender in grace not fear to ourselves and our intimate relationships first. Followed up with embracing the fact that we HAVE NOT been taught how to love, sex or labor in life, but that there are people who can help. We have to be willing to step into those dark spaces of our subconscious and allow ourselves to really be seen, heard and felt. And we MUST recognize that how learning to harness our sexual potential is a Master Key to harnessing our life potential. Just as with the final contractions in labor we know that our sweet innocent angel will soon be in our arms, we also must know that with the final contractions of our sexual orgasm WE will soon be in the arms of our dream life.

Everything is interconnected and there is nothing that has not come from mind.

Our Divine Power to Create like the Creator is housed withing Our Wombs and in the embrace of Orgasm.

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Create the life you desire! Live Orgasmicaly today and every moment and transform those rough, edgy spots that could be perceived as pain and suffering into surrender so that you can bask in Orgasmic Bliss. 

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La Petite Mort of the Heart

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“At the moment of mutual climax, each as individuals has no more significance to the other than the gates of heaven for the one within.” – Swami Saying

christmas-queen of hearts 049“Breathless we kissed each other, fully intoxicated not only in our love for each other but also for the divine essence of its rapture that we were entering into. His whiskers teased my flesh as his lips tasted my bosom and slowly moved downward across my stomach and then his breath, warm and igniting cascaded across my vulva. A flicker of his tongue here and there, gentle thrusts of it entering the ripples of my yoni’s lips. I could feel my hunger growing as I became wetter and wetter. As he devoured my sacred palace of love and enjoyed its sweet nectars I slowly allowed myself to enter the mystical world of orgasm. A medative state manifested with each releasing moan of pleasure. Soon my flesh wanted to feel more of him, a deeper state of orgasm and full unity of deep penetration into a new realm of mystery, love and liberation. 

Pulling him upward, asking him to enter me with his wand of light, my anticipation grew and time seemed to pause. I could feel the inner realms of my pussy quaking and begging to grab a hold of his hard cock and suck on it as it thrusted within my palace.

 At last the moment of his arrival.

 A deep sense of pleasure, comfort and connection came through my being with each stroke.  Deep penetrative strokes blended with christmas-queen of hearts 048deep penetrative kisses, our hearts began the dance of this love making.  Slow, gentle and almost relaxing as the energy increased our hunger for each other with each quiver of our flesh. Chakras opening and aligning our vibrations. At times he would pause, breathe deep, allowing the orgasm to travel up through his being as well as the energy surging from his cock to pulsate my cervix and upward through my core and into my heart.  Once climax (ejaculation) had been recycled, he continued with rhythmic motion as my vaginal muscles squeezed, massaged and pulsated around him.  Then just as energy was intensifying, he escorted himself out of my pleasure palace and asked if he could penetrate me to a greater depth, teasing my anal rose bud with his cock.

 A deep breath of connection as I opened myself to him in this intense lovemaking fashion. Face to face, heart to heart, he slowly, gently penetrated me. Pausing allowing my muscles to accept and flex as they needed so that they could fully invite him in. Then nudging deeper and deeper within me.  My breath was held for a moment and then overtaken with an intense pleasure that was beyond words. Slow strokes of his member gently allowing me to die into this passionate pleasure of bliss.

christmas-queen of hearts 055Loosing myself with each stroke, my hands uncontained reached over my head, grabbing at pillow, the head board, whatever they could find. The intensity of bliss raptured like a comet coming into contact with the sun. I begged him not to stop, but instead to take me further. I wanted to become so vulnerable to this higher state of consciousness, to this land that we rarely touch. I wanted to feel as though he and I no longer existed, we were nothing and yet everything. Fully united and yet cosmic sparks of the creators bliss. As books, a lamp, a candle and who knows what sprayed off the night stand and onto the floor from my hands gone astray I only could find myself longing for this “la petite mort” to never end. For in this small death of my heart I too was being reborn into a new alignment of greater vibration and climactic understanding of self and of God .”

Many a great student of the sacred sexual arts as well as of spiritual development knows that enlightenment is something that we are all Open UR Heart born with; it is not something to chase after and to attain. The path to what we call enlightenment is held within our own sacred wombs. It is a treasure box of mystery and of bliss that the majority of human kind is scared to open yet craves to experience.  Abram Maslow, through research he conducted involving people who he identified as “self actualized” came to the conclusion that people who reach this level share some commonalities… one being that they “routinely experienced orgasm as a spiritual experience, mystical even.”  Napoleon Hill in his 1938 publication of Think and Grow Rich discovered that all the greats of time shared the ability to transmute their strong sexual energy into a driving force that would allow them to manifest the life that they desired.  He called this transmutation the ability to transform mediocrity into genius.

If we were to explore all the enlightened cultures of the world gone by we would see that they all revered sex and its magical ability to manifest abundance and bring its students to a higher divine state of consciousness.

“The goal of life is to make your heartbeat match the heartbeat of the universe. To match your nature with Nature.” Joseph Campbell

Fulfillment in Love

Here is the secret of “The Secret” or the Law of Attraction or Affinity. There are many things that we can do to set ourselves into the vortex of creation but among them the most powerful and most pleasurable as well as fun is to allow ourselves to experience La Petite Mort (the little death) through the life altering state of orgasm. In this state of living expression we destroy our false parts and give birth to our true nature, that being one of a god/goddess; the creator of our own destiny. Many people experience “orgasm” as climax or a high peak that lasts but only a sniffle in time. This is sad that such an alchemizing event is belittled into a momentary muscle spasm of stress release. We view our relationships and our orgasms as something of minor use. In today’s views many people think of their relationships as economic agreements of convenience. These relations are of no real use other than to save money on taxes, get another to feel committed and abide what the contract states or to keep the status quo in good standing for society. Often these contracts are sold to us at youth as a sign of abiding love and something we should desire, but once we grow up and walk down the isle of this lie we discover that most of the time the contract is actually only self imposed shackles that detour us from our true nature and divine ability of create a beautiful world. FACT is our relationships can be significant catalysts to designing the life we desire. They are the harvesting ground for the planting and nurturing of our DREAMS. Each orgasm that we allow to devour us takes us to a new thresh hold of life experience and understanding, bringing us a step, a leap or a bound closer to awakening to the enlightenment of God that lays dormant within our cells.

When we fully surrender to orgasm at this level it becomes what Maslow described in his discovery, “… a spiritual experience, mysticalchristmas-queen of hearts 066 even.” It is in this sacred space of orgasm that we can discover ourselves again and again. Each time at a new vibrational level. To quote Joseph Campbell. “We must be willing to let go of the life that we have planned, in order to accept the life that is waiting for us.” This can only happen through surrender and when we are willing to surrender at this level of living we embrace these multiple mini deaths of self and realization and sometimes even larger, more monumental deaths and we come to the place that Anais Nin spoke of: those who live this deeply have NO fear of physical death.

christmas-queen of hearts 080In orgasm we physiologically change. This is done through hormones and neurotransmitters shifting and being released into our systems. Our physical bodies release fluids that cleanse us and nourish, we for a moment in time escapes the conscious mind and the ego and are liberated into greater parts of the Tree of Life. Yet so many of us allow ourselves to not explore this deep timeless state of surrender and rejuvenation. We prevent ourselves from our maximum capacity to attract all that we long for into our lives by only experiencing superficial orgasms. In a full state of surrender into orgasm we can experience space and time without separation. It is truly this transcendent state that we all crave and try to achieve in any way that is possible. For many though we try and touch this place of mindlessness in an unhealthy way or one that allows us to breathe in life through adrenaline. Weather the vice is an after work drink to relax the nerves and set the conscious mind at bay or an exciting sky diving lesson, it is the experience of life in a higher state of vibration that we are craving. It is the touching of the creator’s big toe that our heart and souls desire to embrace in experience during this physical reality.  M. Scott Peck in his book, “Further Along the Road Less Traveled,” says that in order for us to reach the highest spiritual climax possible, through intercourse naturally there has to be a deep spiritual connection between lovers. Once we reach that “brief peak point of little death” we lose some sense of physical reality no longer completely grounded in the earthly world, a loss of ego, self, separateness… it is a state of ego death.  When we release the ego all that we are left with is LOVE. In this state of blissfulness the world will rearrange itself just for us allowing us to become the great alchemists of it.

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In this spiritual climax we can overcome all obstacles. We can choreograph our life according to our soul’s purpose and heart’s desire and we can call down the blessing from heaven that God longs to share. Here we don’t just exist and make it through another day, content with a mediocre reality, her we excel in life experience and truly LIVE the life that we were destined for. Here in this state of orgasm we reach a new level of mind blowing meditation and climactally embrace the world.

All you have to do is ask yourself if you BELIEVE that YOU are worth your dreams? Or would you rather settle for a life of average and ordinary, one where the after work cocktail and the superficial sniffle of the average orgasm is what you are allowing to be the highlights of your life exploration?

The power in your coming desires to GIVE you the life you always have dreamed of.

–KW

Sacred Sexy Love