LOVE SHOULD BE PERFECT.
And yet it never is.
A long time ago when I was living in Seattle, Washington I was attending a church in Kent with a pastor that I adored. I learned so much from Pastor Jack. He was focused on teaching the congregation about blessings, about our glory and how that translated into the law of attraction.
I still make use of his teachings today with my clients almost daily and in my shares here with you as well.
Among my favorite things he shared were,
“More than enough with plenty left over.”
Which always commanded in the belief and feeling that we are always provided for,
that we always have more than enough in the things that we need with plenty left to share.
And that the leftovers are there for us to do just that …..SHARE.
And then his other reminder of truth that I have kept in my heart and mind all these years was focused toward relationships….
The relationship of marriage.
And in today’s world,
which even though greatly different than that of just 15 years ago when Pastor Jack was preaching his wisdom to me,
is still all the same.
His words of truth were simple.
“Marry your best friend.”
Those words made me look at my marriage,
and perhaps were words that supported me to divorce a few years later. Although back then I would have felt the need to confirm that I was best friends with my then husband,
the reality was not that we were best friends.
We got along on a ton of items,
but I found that I had to restrict myself in so many ways,
and that was not friendship,
and certainly not best friends.
When I am working with couples today in my coaching practice many come to me troubled and on the cusp of a breaking up because of so many things…
*Not enough sex or bad sex.
*Abuse of one kind or another.
*Lack of sexual desire.
And most couples will start off their tale by telling me that they are best friends with their spouse,
that they can tell them anything,
that they have fantastic communication.
fill in the blank from above list here.
They believe that if they had more sex/better sex or a stronger desire for their partner,
if they were physically attracted more to them,
if they had more money in the bank,
or what have you that their marriage would be perfect.
Now the reality is that if you are in an abusive relationship ( no matter what that looks like) that chances are you need to get out of it because an abusive partner often does not see their wrong and change,
if you are in a relationship that has suffered from infidelity,
There can be work done and you can repair it and even come back stronger than ever before if love and communication/friendship is at the front stage of both parties minds.
The desire for more sex, better sex or having more desire for your partner… .these things can be detrimental if the friendship and love are not there first and if both parties are not open to raw, real discussions based in truth and love to work on these challeneges,
but if both parties are wanting the connection and can be emotionally mature to take responsibility for self and speak their truth and work together on these items,
then you can have a deeply strong bond and the sex and desire can grow from it.
The relationships that come to me wanting these things,
often have one MAJOR obstacle however…
One partner is stubborn and refuses to see the truth.
Refuses to take the matter seriously or take the time and effort required to build this part of the relationship. They don’t believe that it is their problem and that the other partner is to blame for it and needs the fixing.
However that is never the case.
Relationships are always a two way street.
It always requires both people to want to connect and come together. It requires both parties to take responsibility for themselves and to not get caught up in their old wounds from the past.
Unfortunately, this is where the relationship breaks down.
People often don’t want to do this.
They want the easy street and they say,
“Love should be easy.”
“Love should be perfect.”
We are all human.
And there is no such thing as the perfect human.
If you have a list of fifty qualities that you want and count highly important in a mate,
and you believe that you will get ALL of these qualities in one person and until you get them all that you will not settle,
I ask you to look in the mirror and ask of yourself if you exhibit all fifty of them yourself?
You are never going to find someone who is 100% of those qualities a hundred percent of the time.
They are human.
You are human.
And life changes and transforms us.
Some qualities can be developed over time.
Some are just there and a natural part of who we are,
some are based on energetic connections,
while others have everything to do with our gene pool.
If you are counting any of these qualities as love though,
you are mistaken.
Qualities do not define love.
They add to love.
They sweeten the pot.
Love is something that you cannot explain,
nor does it need to be explained.
It just is.
And when it is felt on both sides now you have something special.
LOVE COMES FROM BEING ABLE TO BE YOURSELF WITH SOMEONE ELSE, UNMASKED.
When we can do this with someone,
we feel acceptance and love for self and it translates to “loving someone else” because we see the reflection of what we are feeling for self as what we see coming or going toward another.
When we “fall in love” or catch feels for someone,
what is actually happening is that we are witnessing ourselves in love. We are falling in love with self and this other person is simply helping us see our own beauty.
That is why the best friend statement is so powerful.
In friendship there is an acceptance, an unconditional love.
It goes past all that life can change for us,
like our physical bodies appearance,
our health or financial status,
it looks past our ups and downs and even past the chemical connectors that we have on the front side of a romantic relationship that over the course of three to five years diminish and change.
But for some reason, we humans believe that love should be perfect.
That these connecting chemicals should ALWAYS be there,
that the energy and excitement of the first kiss is the way that we will remain throughout all of time,
that the person who is standing before us perfect in their skin of today will never change,
that the feelings that we are having will just remain unwavering.
Or that if we do not have all these sudden rushes of ignition but that we do deeply care and connect in all other ways that this is not or cannot be real love.
That it is “ONLY FRIENDSHIP” and we in turn lower it to that level and get frustrated that we cannot find Mr. or Mrs. Perfect that checks all of our boxes on our list of fifty all of the time.
And so we remain living in search of something that has been offered to us repeatedly. Believing that if we explore,
if we open ourselves to the love that is there before us and go as deep as we can with it that we are settling,
we are giving up,
that if they don’t have everything that they are not Mr. or Mrs. Perfect and instead are a waste of our precious time.
What we are doing to ourselves in this is denying ourselves the beauty of discovery of love.
Love is a quest of self.
Love is about finding out who we really are through our relating with another.
It is about meeting all aspects of self,
and without relationship we will never meet our authentic selves at any depth.
When we continue to look for perfection in a mate,
What we are actually saying is that we ourselves are not worthy of our own love until we become PERFECT as well.
So how will you ever find Mr. or Mrs. Perfect if you prevent yourself from growing into your whole beautiful self by denying love to be birthed through a relationship with another imperfect human who is there as your teacher of self love?
Chances are your relationship with anyone will not last in a forever sense.
That reality although harsh is still a reality.
We outgrow each other,
and as we change sometimes our mates choose a path of slower or limited growth that creates a breaking point in the relationship,
but if we have come together in friendship and love,
then even the parting is done in the same fashion.
And we each can gain what we need for our own development.
It’s time that we start to view relationships and even marriage as the opportunity to explore self and learn to love deeply through the witnessing of another that rivets us deeper into our truth.
Love is always perfect.
It is always perfect for the moment that the relationship is in.
It is never easy,
but it can always be in flow with who we are.
We create our own obstacles to feeling it by trying to make it perfect in every moment and getting irritated with the reality that love, true love requires each party to grow in connection with self first.
Where does your love stand?
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
Want to learn more about how self-love helps create the grounds to call in your soulmate love today? Reach out to me today for deet’s on 1:1 coaching now.
One of those days when my energy goes to left field…
Or maybe it’s right field.
Or maybe right at the pitcher.
It’s always interesting though on days like this where I feel the arousal of life moving through me,
I feel the hunger to devour every moment,
and the tugs of the past that will always sway around in my soul, reminding me of what I thirst still for.
On days like today,
the universe is quick to remind me of my energetic connections,
of how those fleeting yet powerful thoughts evoke response,
and how quick I can manifest many opportunities into my life to experience everything that I am thirsting for.
This quenching comes through multiple sources however,
and me being human just like you want it the way I want it and all in one package.
Even though I fully understand, appreciate and even value the multiple packages that can show up in my life,
There are some things that I crave for that I JUST WANT IN THE WAY I WANT.
And I know without a doubt that I can have them too.
I have tasted of these delicacies before.
I have been overtaken by the depth of fulfillment that can be experienced all from one source.
And it is truly intoxicating.
AND I WANT THAT!
I don’t really have a ton of patience to wait for it.
I question if I am just wasting time,
or if I just imagined it before.
Or perhaps the truth is that those sorts of things only come once in life,
and when gone they leave us with this beautiful suffering of knowing that it will never be again.
Perhaps they are only so lovely as to walk through our lives because of the deep pain that they bare on our soul.
they are there to make us question ourselves, or to learn how to be better. As if to present a lesson for us to spend the rest of our days unraveling.
I truly don’t know.
But what I do know is that these blessed little and big moments in my life are a feast that I will always run toward and sit at the table of.
I know that when presented I am eager and hungry to explore IF….
and perhaps, this is yet another one of those life moments that will forever leave its mark,
and no matter how deep it may scratch into my flesh and heart,
I know for sure one thing.
IT IS WORTH IT.
How can something that can be such an achilles heel to us be worth anything other than pain and cause us anything other than a major stumbling block in our life?
These things can be like quicksand to us if we get to caught up in them,
and yet we dive in,
and we search for them.
It is because without them,
without the knowing and the deep dive into the ravines of everything that they offer us,
we will NEVER KNOW OURSELVES FULLY.
and with that we can never know love.
We can never feel that true sense of abandon,
where we surrender into nothingness that is everything.
Where all that we are is seen and unraveled like the lessons that we gain from these moments and people who allow us time to bask in the enjoyment of the experience of life with them.
And so we wander through our days,
lost in search for yet this experience again. Ever so hungry to find it,
ever so thirsty to be drowned by it,
and we find our hearts feeling broken.
We find our minds screaming at us in dissatisfaction,
that we are so silly as to be hunting for yet another moment.
Trying to convince ourselves that, that was all the sampling of happiness, connection, love and joy that we get for this lifetime.
Giving all of our power over to just this one moment.
And feeling like we have been shredded into a million pieces and no one cares,
no one sees,
no one hears our pleas to be held yet again in this beauty,
this agonizing beauty that we fear and hunger for all in the same.
What do we crazy fickle humans do?
We manifest into our lives….
That is what we do.
We call it in and we choose to disregard it.
Because we fear its wrath on our lives.
We fear the pain.
We fear the heartache and the loss.
The death of something.
And so we deny allowing it into formation.
We say no to the very thing that we hunger for.
And we choose to sit in agony that we have chosen out of the fear of if we said yes to our dreams and our desires,
if we allowed ourselves to transform and become everything that we need to become to fully merge with this new exploration and blessing,
and we convince ourselves that this sort of suffering is better than the having of yet another altering beautiful moment that we run the risk of losing somewhere down the road.
And so we sit idle in our today,
and stay that way,
Never allowing our thirst to be quenched by the waterfalls that can carry us away to our own divinity.
To the uniting of self and love.
To the potential of who we are and how we can dance in the currents of our transformation.
Yes this is the journey of the fickle human being.
That you and I both are.
We will forever be captivated by our hungers,
our wanting and earning,
and to those we must awaken to our nature to torment ourselves in the not having.
Because when we seek…
when we ask…
It is always granted.
It is never denied by God/universe.
The denying is all up to us.
So what will we choose?
Or to have not?
It is up to you and it is up to me,
and this is how powerful we truly are.
We have the power to shackle ourselves from EVERYTHING,
yes everything that we want for.
What do you choose?
I know my answer.
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
Want to learn how you can one and for all get out of your own way? I get how difficult it can be.
How it feels like there is no way that you can ever achieve the life, the relationship,
the abundance and health that you crave so deeply for.
I understand how easy it is to contribute all that beauty and love from your past to one person,
But I tell you this,
you are the creator of your life and you are worthy of thriving.
Let me show you the path to living unbound and turned on today.
*Photo Credit @ #DandeLionImages
THERE IS A LIE WE BELIEVE THAT CHANGES ALL OF OUR UNDERSTANDING….
With all the worlds chaos and turbulence,
I am witnessing a massive amount of said “lightworkers,” christians, believers of faith and LOA, genuianly “good” souls fall prey to the misconception around a lie that they have bought full heartedly into,
and that lie is AWARENESS = ALWAYS BEING POSITIVE
It is funny how we humans are so eager to jump down one another’s throats in ego and pain,
we point fingers of blame and cuddle up in our victimhood statues of reasoning,
quick to accuse others of being blind, low vibe or even spiritually bypassing issues and feelings,
but then in the same turn of spewing out all these negative charges,
show frustration and even fear toward truth that does hurt.
Toward truth and awareness that does not fit into what we call “spiritual” or “high vibe.”
We shun the concept of awareness that is not always uplifting.
As if seeing the true pain, sorrow, or darkness that does mask each of us in it’s own way and the world in general can just be ignored fully and by ignoring and ONLY focusing in on the good that we will somehow make the evils go away.
It is sort of like the child who is afraid of monsters in the closet so they hide their head under the blankets of their bed and tell themselves as long as I think happy thoughts then there will be no monsters,
but in reality the monsters they are hiding from are their abusive parents fighting in the hallway.
We will never make the evils of this world go away.
That is the truth.
What we perceive as evil is here for a reason,
it is upon this planet to create contrast.
Without contrast in our world we can never know what we desire or want for,
we would not evolve and expand.
It is only through contrast that we fully experience living.
But here is the conundrum for humanity,
how are we to manifest good if we witness the bad and get caught in it?
The key is getting caught in it or not.
There is this concept that feeling sad, angry, upset or any emotion that is not even keel is not good, is not natural.
It is encouraged in many belief structures and in how we raise our children to hold in the pain and anger and not let it out unless we want to be perceived as weak.
This is a falsity and one of the most unhealthy programs that we teach.
WIth this we have enwrapped ourselves in the idea that AWARENESS ….
is only and always to be UPLIFTING.
And when we share awareness that is not uplifting that we are in turn trying to fear monger.
Now don’t get me wrong, what we are all witnessing in our world of current and for many generations is just that from our leaders and media,
we are for sure being programmed by our trust in them and through television programming systems,
just as planned by those that control.
I am not speaking of the agendas of those who crave more power and are corrupt to the core,
I am speaking about the rest of society waking up to the truths that these dark souls are hiding in plain sight from us.
I am speaking about the fact that in order for you to heal anything or make powerful uplifting changes that you must….
First, become AWARE of the issue. And this may not be uplifting to awaken to the reality of a nightmare.
And second, see what the contrast that this nightmare is offering to your level of desire.
From here we can make significant change.
And yes focusing in on it after this point,
getting caught in all its entrappings of fear and darkness will not change it to what you desire for instead but, rather help it to gain power through the momentum of your fear around any such troublesome topic.
Your awareness transformed to true sight of what the opportunity that is actually being offered,
which is a desire for something better,
for love and peace,
equality and safety,
can then be fully embraced.
It is here in this AWARENESS which is uplifting when we empower ourselves with our true heart,
that what we focus on grows.
Here we can now CONSCIOUSLY move ourselves from witnessing the nightmare to putting our focus on what is good in our world.
When we consciously choose to move our focus and experience onto good we create more good.
And we do not get caught in the nightmare although we are aware of it existing.
This is not spiritual bypassing or ignoring of any sort,
it is being proactive with our life expression, thoughts and feelings.
It is not just hiding our heads under the covers and “trying” to think good thoughts,
but in turn moving ourselves authentically into good feeling experiences which means to focus on the sun coming up each day, the people in our lives who love us, our dog excited we are playing fetch, our child hugging us, our lover desiring us, the food in our fridge, that our car works, our heart is beating, the birds are chirping, Ozarks has a season 4….lol
Whatever makes you genuinely feel good.
That is the ticket.
And to hold this good feeling though for just one minute each day without doubt.
Did you catch that?
Doubt destroys the feeling.
Doubt pulls us back to the fear and the hiding,
and from there we fall into our pain bodies and fight amongst ourselves which in turn keeps the fires of our world burning ever so more greatly.
To create the world and the life that we desire most for,
we must become AWARE and we MUST learn to find the beauty and empowerment in our own darkness,
When we can be grateful for our darkness we will then be able to see its truth in its offering to us and make conscious choices to breathe into life the world we crave most for.
Embrace the contrast.
And AS Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
Learn to manifest an unbound life today.
NEVER APOLOGIZE FOR EVOLVING PAST PEOPLE’S COMFORT ZONES.
It’s challenging to stay the course of your truth.
Our human nature is to want to “fit in” and to be “normal.”
But that is not our soul course.
The soul desires truth, expansion and freedom.
We human’s get caught in our perceptions and ego and want to keep everything in a safe little container where it is easily explained, accepted and does not rattle the cages of our fellow human beings.
Here we feel normal and safe.
And when we see things differently,
we may feel guilty for our views and thoughts as they do not correspond to the majority. People will call us names, accuse of being crazy, nieve, under educated or even fear based.
They will shun and mock,
shame and want to contain you.
But this only show’s their uncomfort in your evolution.
When we step out on the limb of personal evolution we bring forth in other’s their lack of evolution,
we shine a bright light into their darkness and fears,
and by just being ourselves we make them question the reality that they have been raised to believe is truth.
The majority of people will step away from you at this moment.
They will tell you that they can no longer walk alongside you because of a difference of opinion,
because your views are too far out there,
because your lifestyle does not align to what they believe is right,
and that you should care that they are cutting you loose.
Many will argue with you in a pursuit to change your mind and educate you as to “WHAT IS” and want you to listen to their understanding and CHANGE so that you will be living in accordance to what they perceive ass truth,
thus allowing them to feel safe and right once again.
But I tell you this,
to limit your growth and hinder your evolution to make another comfortable will NEVER make you happy,
and it will not prevent people from walking away from you.
All it will ever accomplish is to limit your full potential and create a life that was not lived by soul guidance,
but instead by the judgements, opinions, ideas, and beliefs of others.
You own no one a reason,
and most certainly not an apology for being authentically you.
No matter your beliefs,
no matter your views and fears,
if they feel aligned and good,
if they build you up and make you happy,
then they are in YOUR SOUL ALIGNMENT.
And to be in soul alignment means that you are in alignment with the universe and God as well.
You will never feel good, happy or joyous about any other path.
All other paths will bring about fear, anxiety, frustration,
a desire to control others, hatred,
and have you sitting in your ego,
where you feel trapped by the ways of the world around you.
Our emotions are our GPS to our true path. To our most rewarding, abundant and happy state of living.
If you are happy,
then you know that you are in soul alignment,
and through your joy you will create the life of your dreams.
This will make others extremely uncomfortable though.
And this will pull many away from you.
As you walk in ease and flow,
as you show that you can be aware of the world as they perceive it without getting caught up in it,
and as you continue to thrive,
you will make them extremely uncomfortable,
and most will choose to criticize you,
attempting to break you back down to where they feel comfortable again.
NEVER APOLOGIZE FOR YOUR EVOLUTION AND UNDERSTANDING OF THE LAWS OF THE UNIVERSE OR YOUR ABILITY TO BE AUTHENTICALLY YOU.
This is your life.
Live it for you.
Anything else is you giving your life to another,
and existing through their fears and wounds.
If you are reading this musing today then you are already awakening more to your divine nature,
you are starting to see clearly the truth of how our universe works,
and you are questioning your reality.
You have desires,
and you know that there is a power inside of you that wants to be unleashed.
I want you to know that all you need to to tap into that power is to start to say yes to you.
And thank those who turn away and challenge you,
be in gratitude for the naysayers,
they are revealing to you that you are stepping away from average and ordinary thinking and feeling,
they are showing you your evolution,
that you are rising above the norm and stepping into your power.
They are also showing you upfront if they are truly your tribe or not.
Those who evolve past the majority’s comfort zones are always perceived as crazy.
But all great leaders, game changers and visionaries over the course of human history have broken free from the common mindset of their time,
they did not look at the world through average and ordinary eyes.
They chose to be different,
because they knew somewhere inside of them that that was what they must do to achieve their soul’s happiness and do what they came here to do.
Today is your day love.
It’s time for you to step onto your path and say yes to your soul.
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
Message me for deet’s on how to claim your power and follow your GPS today. You are worthy of a life that is thriving.
IT TAKES COURAGE TO HAVE AN AUTHENTIC RELATIONSHIP.
I have this belief that ALL…
Yes ALL people who are in an intimate relationship with another need to go through the inquiry and inner work as well and relating work that those who have successful open relationships do.
I believe that no matter how you label your relationship,
that you should explore authentic relating for what it really means.
Most monogamous couples “think” they know each other.
“Think” they love each other unconditionally.
“Think” they are best friends and trust each other.
“Think” they are doing it right and will have success.
Most people who decide to open up their relationships choose to do so at a low period in their primary relationship and “think” that opening up will fix something.
“Think” that you can just overnight shift gears and that this thing called inner work and couples work to set agreements, learn each other and communicate are not needed.
That you can go zero to 100 overnight so to speak.
Both cases are detrimental to the relationship.
And it’s because the number one issue in relationships is communication.
And I am sure you may be among the many who believes that you communicate well with your partner.
You may think that you got this fully taken care of ,
but I ask you, is this true?
98% of couples that I have worked with over the last 15+ years come in telling me that they are good if not great communicators,
that their partner is their bestie and they can tell them anything.
But not three sessions into coaching and the truth is discovered.
They suck at communication.
Because they keep it at a surface level.
There is no depth in relating.
And if they touch on depth,
it causes confrontation,
triggers old wounds and fears,
and both parties end up dancing in their ego’s and speaking from their pain bodies instead of their heart centers.
So they avoid it.
They shut their truth down,
they tell their partners a softer version or nothing at all,
and they hide the best they can from themselves for as long as they can as to not rock the perfect picture of a loving connected relationship that they are wanting to paint.
When the hard fact is that they have challenges.
It takes courage to speak up in a relationship.
It takes courage to be real in a relationship.
It takes courage to listen without trying to change, control or freak out about what might be being shared in a relationship.
It takes courage to remain stable inside yourself when living authentically with another.
And it takes courage to be raw and real with yourself so you can do all the above.
But f-ck is it worth it,
just like you are worth it and so is your relationship.
You see, if you are among the many who are not operating at this level of authentic relationship but desire open communication, unconditional love, acceptance, honesty and truth in the relationship and from your partner,
then how is it ever going to be possible if you live hiding from yourself and basing your feelings and actions in fear of losing your partner?
If you are making your partner responsible for your happiness and worthiness then how can they ever just be themselves and state their truth to you?
If you are holding expectations as to what they need to do, how they need to act then how can they share their truth with you about anything that may pose a difficult conversation? And how is this unconditional love?
If you define yourself based on your relationship,
which simply means you are not strong in WHO YOU ARE,
then how can you be truthful with another?
To be authentic, truthful and honest with another you first must KNOW YOURSELF and be strong at your core so you are not rocked by another.
Remember that humans are fickle.
We ebb and flow,
we all are live waves in our feelings, emotions, thoughts and that we get caught in our wounds as well as our desires.
In authentic relating we understand that
there is your business,
there is my business,
and there is God’s business,
and that we each are ONLY RESPONSIBLE for one of those.
Anything else is sticking our noses where they are not needed.
The most unconditional loving person is the person who knows themselves, loves themselves first, and can embrace their shadow self as well as their glorious light.
They know their worth and it is not dependent on any outside source.
This is a person who can love deeply and unconditionally.
This is a person who can truly be honest and real.
This is a person who is self-empowered and therefore has the ability to allow for their partner to grow, to speak, to change.
As it is so intended.
relationships need to evolve over time.
This means that both parties need to do the same.
Expecting ourselves, our partners or the relationship to remain the same,
causes stagnation to our individual growth and the evolution of our love and relationships.
This is the coward’s path.
And it typically results in two things:
It takes courage to relate authentically.
It takes courage to relate in unconditional love.
It takes courage to catch our control issues in a relationship.
It takes courage to see our fear based actions, feelings and thoughts for what they are… fear of our own inadequacies, fear of our worthiness and lack of value, the lack of personal acceptance cast onto our partner, and fear of abandonment.
But when we stand in courage and face our truth,
love ourselves through our fears,
we open the gates to deep, penetrative love and acceptance with our partner.
THIS is what we all crave and desire.
You are worthy of this beauty.
You are worthy of this sort of love.
Offer it to yourself and your partner today,
by starting with seeing YOURSELF authentically and leaning into those difficult conversations.
Reach out to me if you want information on how to go about just this and more.
Learn authentic relating no matter your relationship title to create an evolved loving relationship that fits your soul’s path now.
And As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
A few years ago I was out at a local pub that my ex and I would pop into and have a drink. It sorta was his “Cheers” for anyone who can remember the show.
You know a place where everyone knows your name.
And I was sitting down enjoying a martini with a woman that my ex was friends with her and her husband for years prior.
We were chatting about all sorts of stuff, among which was professionalism.
She informed me that she could NEVER work with someone who had tattoos.
She went on to tell me that tattoos make you unclean.
And that only under educated people had them.
Her passion about the subject was powerful,
She certainly had a hatred toward tattoos and it sounded like she looked down on anyone with them no matter whom they were.
Yet she counted me as someone to go out to see Andrea Bocelli with,
to kick back and enjoy drinks and dinner with by the pool,
to share her relationship issues with,
and amazingly she even hugged me to say hello and goodbye.
In the midst of her deep sharing on her hatred and disgust toward people with tattoos and how unprofessional and unclean they were,
I sat there with my hands and arms on the table not inches in front of her,
baring both arms with….
You guessed it.
TATTOOS on them…
Yeah, she was preaching her disgust to her friend.
I shared with her that I worked with many people who had tattoos, and she said yeah but those are people who need life coaching, help in life, not people who are professionals.
Because my clients have always been those who are professionals, business owners, CEO’s, doctor’s, attorney’s, poloticains, fellow coaches and therapists, etc.
85% of my clients are in the upper 2% of America.
And guess what?
They have tattoos.
Many of them do.
When I shared this with her,
she huffed and said,
“Well, if I ever found out that my doctor had a tattoo he would not be my doctor anymore. I cannot have someone like that touching me.”
Yet she hugged me hello and goodbye.
Her logic made no sense.
As most critical, judgemental people who are caught up in
“it’s my way or no way, and you are stupid and need to shut up or be removed from humanity if you think, feel or act differently then I do, ” rationalize.
These same people will turn and point fingers and call everyone who is not caving to their beliefs and fears self-centered, bad citizens, using their privilege, elitists.
In my line of work I get hate from time to time.
And I actually am grateful for it,
because it shows me area’s that I can improve my own inner world. It also show’s me that I am speaking from a perspective that is not average and ordinary.
And that thrills me because I do not want an average and ordinary life,
Living a F-ck Yes! Life and changing others lives to having that as well requires you to not go with the attitude of average and ordinary.
There ain’t now THRIVING in average and ordinary.
There is not GREATNESS in it either.
My mission is to help ignite as many people to their power and worthiness and tap into their abundance and flow with God as I possibly can in my lifetime,
and this unfortunately stirs many of the ordinary thinkers and perceivers of life out there to want to strike me down for many reasons.
“You need to shut up because…”
“You are not professional because..”
“You are wrong because….”
“I can’t trust you because….”
“You are stupid because….”
From my typo’s to my purple or blue hair,
from my open relating and tattoos to my I don’t give a f-ck what you think and use of the “F” word,
my authentic relating drives average folk crazy mad that they cannot control it and that despite all my flaws and my typo’s and tattoos I am THRIVING in relationship, money, health and making a positive mark in this world because I CHOOSE to do so.
I write this today,
because at waking my thread was bombarded with my fellow coaches and leaders out there being under attack for all the above reasons and more.
The judgment and criticism spewing around in hatred is like a storm that has no way to settle,
and it is sad to me that so many people in the world right now are living with such disgust and rage in their heads and hearts that they find a need to try to tear down another just because of differences of views, desires, beliefs or even looks.
This kind of stinking thinking WILL NEVER solve any problems.
It will only keep the fires burning and cause more pain and suffering.
When we can come back to actual critical thinking,
using logic and heart in harmony,
viewing our fellow human as just that,
another human with their own dreams, desires, fears, beliefs and opinions,
and that, that is perfect,
that being human does not mean that we are all cookie cutter the same,
then we will be able to heal ourselves and our world at a deeper level.
Until then we remain blind to love.
Blind to healing.
Blind to true world or local community.
Until then we have lost our humanity,
and are slaves to our fear of difference.
Where are you at in your judgements of your fellow humans and how are you desiring to control those who are the same as you?
Can you imagine what life would be like and who you would actually be if you put down all your fear based thinking and just allowed yourself to be YOU?
This is your truth love.
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
Ready to stop your stinking thinking and claim your true power now?
Let’s chat. Message me for deet’s on how to get started.
It’s a THING.
And it’s a thing that you gotta get some of if you want to have the life that you claim that you want.
We have been raised to have shame over loving ourselves.
We have been raised to believe that it is wrong or even bad to think highly of ourselves,
or to brag.
And it is “selfish” ( meaning bad) to ask for what we want, need or desire.
But instead the correct path to happiness is to look like this so we have been raised to believe…
Talk like shit about yourself,
hate on your body,
on your thoughts,
in your life.
Be SUPER effing critical about everything and never admit to your glory.
Downplay everything good and hype up everything that is not perfect in your life.
Make sure that you are NEVER offending everyone else,
yes you are responsible for everyone else’s feelings, ideas, perceptions, thoughts and actions,
so make sure to never mess up or have an opinion that does not match whomever you are with.
Put others before yourself at all costs.
Exhaust yourself and keep giving,
but don’t bitch that you are at your breaking point.
Suck it up.
Don’t show your emotions,
any of them but “blase.”
Indifference is the best path,
even if it’s not true.
hide because it is too effing much for the world around you.
And know that you are most likely at fault for the crap no matter what,
and if it’s not you then feel offended instantly,
if anyone says different or God forbid
goes against all of these rules of how to live a happy successful life.
And just be happy with it already,
‘cus this baby is what life is all about.
This is living the dream.
This is success.
F-cking crazy as all hell is’nt it?
I mean when I write it out like that,
unless you are blind, dumb and stupid,
then you have to admit that anyone who actually thinks or feels this way is NEVER going to be thriving,
going to experience success or empowerment,
never going to feel confident.
Most likely only be used and hurt frequently,
will have a crappy backbone,
will not know themselves or anyone else for that matter,
and will simply not ever touch happiness.
So what is the answer?
Get a f-cking THRONE-TOOD!
There I said it.
It is high time that you started to value yourself.
Claiming your life, ‘calling in your blessings,
being a conscious co-creator,
manifesting a life that is full of wonder, love and success,
REQUIRES YOU TO PUT YOUR CROWN ON.
As long as you keep disrespecting God’s glory and power and not allowing his power and will to move through your life,
then you will keep falling prey to this stinking thinking love.
As long as you keep believing that God wants you to walk looking down at the ground,
tripping in misery over all that you have lost and ignoring the joy that your life could be,
then you will never feel the wonder of walking with you head held high,
your eyes meeting others in unconditional love and acceptance,
or the witnessing of the miracles that happen daily,
IN YOUR LIFE.
As long as you keep being available for scarcity,
and never picking up that crown that God has handed you,
then you will continue to suffer by your own hand.
And you will forever remain a slave to the enemy known as fear.
Oh, beautiful, don’t you see the path that you are too walk.
Can you not feel the call in your soul?
Now in our world we need more than ever before for you to RISE UP….
But that means that you have to accept that many who choose to remain in darkness and pain will be disgusted by your choice.
They will call you names,
they will hate on you and shame you,
they will want to tear you down in any way they can,
and they will make you doubt your path.
It will require you to have courage,
to love yourself more than you thought possible and to walk in FAITH.
And if you choose to step away from the many who still remain in fear,
if you choose to instead embrace your power,
and the love that the universe/God has for you,
then your life will be one of bliss and glory.
THAT is what we are each to do.
That is how we celebrate life,
Are you ready, love?
Are you ready to finally say F-ck Yes! to yourself and your dreams and stop making excuses and sharing the thousands of reasons as to why you cannot do/be/have?
But instead just step firmly in faith on this path before you that is calling you?
Are you ready to stop giving your power just lip service but acting in faith on it?
I can tell you that many people say they are light workers,
they claim to be abundant,
they proclaim their faith,
and they say they believe in magic and miracles,
they even proudly state that they get manifesting and that they are powerful manifestors….
and they are.
But, if you are struggling,
if you are suffering,
if you are feeling lost, tired and lonely…
Then baby, you are not really claiming your crown.
If you are not happy, (truly)
then you still have not figured it out,
and it YOU that this is written for.
It is you that need to KNOW YOUR WORTH.
It’s time to pick that crown up and have a THRONE-TOOD….
Because the life that you want for DEMANDS IT!
So Get One.
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
Ready to step forward and say yes to your crown love?
Ready to stop being available for suffering, pain and misfortune?
Let’s speak today about no more reasons and excuses,
and get that crown picked up and put where it rightfully goes.
Message for deet’s.