You Say You Are in Alignment.

You say you are in alignment,
but you are broke.
You say that you are in alignment,
but you are fatigued and ill.
You say that you are in alignment,
but your life is in shambles and has you down.
You say that you are in alignment,
but nothings aligning to you.
 
 
Sound familiar?
Sound like maybe you personally have experienced?
 
I am familiar with this false alignment.
I have lived it.
Breathed it.
and been taken down by it.
 
It’s never fun to want so badly to be in alignment,
and turn around and see that you are not.
Fearful that if we admit that we are out of alignment that we will be leaning even more into all that we do not want,
so we just keep denying reality.
 
Yet, reality stares us in the face.
As we get asked to do something that we cannot afford,
we find ourselves wanting or needing something that we have to say, ” I am sorry, I cannot afford that, it’s too much.”
 
We wake up feeling like we were run over by a train,
day after day.
Or our bodies just cannot seem to feel good.
Illness bogs us down.
There is limited energy.
 
We look around our world,
and drama,
and trauma,
seem to be what makes up our existence.
 
Lady luck does not favor us,
even though we proclaim she does.
 
We know we are lying to ourselves,
we feel it in our bones.
we see it in our reflection in the mirror.
And we cringe.
 
There is a holding onto the fear.
You know that feeling.
 
That grasping in your chest.
That tightness in your gut.
That anxiety.
That melancholy feeling that just lingers.
 
And we hide.
We drink.
We eat all the wrong foods or nothing at all.
We smoke.
We “bake” ourselves.
 
And we hide.
We say its to help us let go.
It’s to help us decompress.
To help us sleep.
To help with this or that.
 
And sure it is.
 
But it is also there ,
and it is mainly this,
there to hide us from our pain.
From our lack of alignment.
 
The lies we tell.
The stories we make.
The masks we wear.
 
They do nothing but paint a picture of pain.
A pain that will devour us, if we do not get REAL.
 
Real with who we are.
Real with what we want.
Real with life.
And just open to the glory that is all around us.
Stop holding the fear,
stop practicing the thoughts,
the thoughts that kill us.
That steal from us our joy.
Our truth.
Our Abundant Life.
 
You say that you are in alignment.
But what does your alignment say about your vibration?
 
Today is a blessed day.
Or so it can be,
for you,
for me,
for all who claim it.
 
Today is a day,
that you can decide to say yes.
YES to yourself.
YES to your Abundant Life.
 
And this all stems not from the words that you speak in lies to your friends and family,
 
NO.
 
It comes from within.
The thoughts you think between the words.
The feelings you attach to those words and thoughts.
The love that you give,
not to others,
but to SELF.
 
Are you ready?
Are you ready to say YES?
 
I sure the f-ck hope you are.
This world needs you,
needs you to STOP your crazy self sabotage,
STOP your scarcity beliefs,
STOP your stinking thinking.
 
And JUST SAY YES!
 
Yes I am powerful.
Yes I am worthy.
Yes I am abundant.
Yes I am beautiful.
Yes I am vibrant.
Yes, yes, yes.
 
 
Look at that worthy, amazing soul in the mirror.
Look, really look.
And love them.
 
They need your love more than anyone else on this planet.
 
Many blessings to you this Sunday.
 
And as always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
 
Join me November 18-21st for my 3 day intensive online workshop.
Ass In The Sand – Facebook Live Workshop for Entrepreneurs Who Want It All
If you are an entrepreneur and you want to know how to take your biz from zero to $100k quickly, for real – then this intensive class is for you.
 

The Goddesses Dragon – My Tale of Surrender to the Masculine

He wants my surrender.
I can feel it at my greatest depths.

He wants me fully.
Open and inviting to his everything.
He wants my surrender,
and he is willing to work for it.
He is willing to take the journey into the depths of my being,
where he will uncover my hidden treasures,
which I fear may seem like dragons,
yet he assures me in his holding,
that he does not want to slay my dragons,
he only want to bask in their beauty,
he wants to sit with them in moments of stillness,
and he wants to just take them in.

He wants to see their beauty,
that beauty that only a deep understanding of love can handle,
that beauty that is so revealing of the soul.
Most are not strong enough within themselves to face this beauty,
this light,
this power,
the dragon.

Most fear being devoured by it.
What they begin in the courting process admiring from a afar,
they end with wanting to own and control.
Because it scares them.
It is wild,
it is fierce,
it is powerful beyond measure,
and desires to conquer the hearts of its admirers.

Few are able to hold themselves,
within the presence of this beast.

But, every now and then,
a gentleman comes about,
makes himself known,
and smiles in the presence of the magic he has found in caverns of the goddess.

And this gentleman,
this gentleman,
ignites the goddesses soul.
Sets it on fire.

And she desires to dance for him.
She desires to open herself for him,
and let him in.

Yet she is scared beyond measure,
her past tells of beautiful love saga’s,
intense love and loss.
She is fearful to become vulnerable with this man.
Because of the pain,
the pain that her heart will endure.
Yet she desires it all.
The love and depth,
are worth the pain.
Are worth the standing before her own dragon,
and smiling within its flames.

She know’s that this man,
is rare, and unique.
That he is one who can hold her fire.
At least for a time.
And she wants to surrender.
She craves the intimacy.
She craves the revealing.
She craves the integrity.
And the opening.

Physically.
Mentally.
Emotionally.

She leans in.
And she drops into his arms,
resting in his strength.
Resting in his admiration.
She let’s her emotions be seen.
She laughs,
she cries,
and she opens a bit more.

This cavern is deep.
And she realizes,
that her dragon is not to be feared.

She now understands what this gentleman has known,
the fire of her dragon will not harm when lifted in love,
it will only light the way to more caverns for them to explore.

Explore together.
The depths of their souls.

And so she looks at the gentleman,
with tears streaming from her eye’s,
and she say’s yes to the opening.

They lay together, enwrapped in the moment,
and they smile.

Blessed be to all of you who read this and venture into the depths of the goddesses caverns with hearts on fire,
and souls ignited.

Be wise in your journey and know that the dragon is there to protect the goddess from those that are unworthy,
and there to guild those who are,
into her surrender.

As always,
Stop Existing & Start Living

For more coaching, truth shares and awakened education join me for 1+1 coaching via phone, zoom or in person. Or follow me on Facebook for my morning FREE Conscious Coffee Broadcasts where I share truth bombs and alignment asskickery.

Don’t Sacrifice Your Life for Anything.

Change vs. Embrace
This is the statement of today that speaks so loud to me.
 
It carries with it the reality of how f-cking crazy we humans can be.
 
And none of us can escape the crazy.
These sort of thoughts based in fear of loss,
are among the worst.
They prevent us from truly living up to our full potential.
 
We fear change.
We fear embracing who we really are.
It feels like we have to give something up in order to become ourselves.
 
But that is silly.
It is all about expansion,
not about reduction.
 
Change does not mean that we have to sacrifice anything.
It means that we will make different judgments,
different choices then what we would under an old way of being. That is all.
 
Same with embodiment of self.
Once we start to embody ourselves,
we start to embrace all that we could be,
could have, ‘could do.
and we STOP accepting less for our lives.
 
This is only scary because we typically do not feel worthy of claiming this level of greatness into our lives.
 
The lack of worthiness causes us to doubt.
Tells us that we will loose.
tells us that things can not continue to be this great,
that there is a price that must be paid.
 
And so we move into stagnation.
We pause.
And we pause some more.
Until the pause causes us to embrace the pause,
and then we fear movement even more.
 
We look out at our world and we see evidence that standing in our truth will cause relationships to break,
will cause careers to fail or change, will cause discomfort in life. And we fear the pain.
 
What we forget it that all birth,
no matter what the birth is based on,
will come with pain.
The pain of discovery.
The pain of consciousness.
The pain of feeling who we are and how much we have been denying who we are.
Hiding from ourselves.
Hiding from our desires.
 
Change vs. Embrace
 
They are the same and yet not.
When we focus in on change, we lean into the belief that there is something about us that is not good enough and it needs to change.
 
When we focus in on embracing who we are, we often lean into the belief that we are too much and the world cannot handle us, therefore we will loose.
 
Either way, we are scared of loosing.
 
And at the end of the day,
you know what will happen when you keep denying your truth?
 
Do you?
Think about it.
 
If you look into dis-ease you will discover pretty quickly that all dis-ease is just that, a dis-ease in the body which stems from something (emotional/ psychological) that we are masking, hiding from and not wanting to give the time of day to.
 
Why are we hiding from these things?
Because they carry pain.
It may mask itself as anger, frustration, anxiety or depression, but they are all some pain that is stored up.
 
And one of the biggest pains we carry with us,
is the pain of not stepping into who we are meant to be,
who we want to be, or showing up in life the way we know we should.
 
The pain of potentially,
okay let’s be real here,
most likely,
 
Going to die without living out our mission.
Our purpose,
with our music still in us.
 
And the true sad thing is…
that by hiding from our truth,
ignoring out of fear of loss our beauty,
our power,
our music,
we end us killing ourselves.
 
Yet we will proclaim proudly,
that we are willing to sacrifice our lives in order to keep all that we fear loosing NEVER realizing that if we loose our lives that we will as well loose all that we are trying to not loose in the first place by denying our truth.
 
Silly yes.
But so f-cking true.
 
 
Just look at your life.
Look at your best friend.
Your sister.
Your uncle.
or anyone.
 
We are all guilty of this sin.
We all consistently say no to our truth out of fear,
and we all reap the rewards of the physical and emotional pain that it brings with it.
 
The key to stepping into who you are.
To EMBRACING Yourself and living unappologetically as the beautiful, powerful you that God intended,
is SIMPLE as F-ck!
 
Just Do it!
Grow a f-cking pair,
and put one foot in front of the other.
Take action, by leaning into the now.
Into what your heart says.
And say YES.
Say YES to yourself.
 
Because you are worth it.
You can have it.
And God wants you to be powerful,
bright and beautiful,
abundant and over flowing with blessings.
 
Claim your life.
As always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
www.kendalwilliams.com
 
Join me November 18-21st for my 3 day intensive online workshop.
Ass In The Sand – Facebook Live Workshop for Entrepreneurs Who Want It All
If you are an entrepreneur and you want to know how to take your biz from zero to $100k quickly, for real – then this intensive class is for you.
Pre-registration coming out this next week.
Look for it or message me to get on the pre-launch list.

An Ode to the Gentleman.

You say you can hear my smile in my voice.

You say that you want an opportunity to court me.
You say so much…

It is not your words.
It is all in your actions.
In those looks you give me.
The way your lips turn slightly different with your smirk,
The way you take my hand,
the groans that you make when you are close.

You say so much,
in the way you stay present with me.
The way you always make sure to be the gentleman.
You lead me strong.
You lead me with love.

You say that you believe that people grow tired of each other,
and without saying,
you let me know you fear that I will grow tired of you.
You fear that I bore easily.
But your desire for me speaks,
in all the little things.
They do not go unnoticed.

You say that if we did it right,
then we would not grow tired,
because the thing that bores,
is that when two come together they do less than more.

You are right.
And so I lean into your lead.
I lean into all that you say.
With your words.
With your smirk.
With your groans.
With how you hold me.
With how you protect me.
With how you remain present,
and
dance in this beautiful energy.
This energy that we have danced in,
and we have paused from,
and find ourselves back in.

Yes you say so much.
So much I want to hold on too.

So much that causes my heart to quake.
So much that scares me,
because in your presence,
I feel beautiful.

In your arms I feel held.
In your embrace,
I feel loved.

And when you look at me,
with your everyday sultry eye’s,
and smile.
I feel like your queen.

Cherished.
Adored.
and
Desired.

You say so much,
in so many ways.
And it is these things that captivates my soul.
It is these things that ignites my heart.
It is these things that opens me,
Open’s me to your love.

To the man that you are.
The man that I had tried to ignore.
The man that is patiently waiting.
Waiting for me to return,
return that look,
return that smirk,
return that holding,
and surrender,
once more.

To all the gentlemen who remain strong masculine,
leading in love, in compassion, and desire.
To all of you gentlemen, who understand that courting is vital, and leading is your part of the dance.
Thank you.

You are loved and needed.

As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living

Explore my Passion Coaching for Couple’s of Private Solo-Coaching. Two Private Coaching Spot’s open NOW. 

Bounce the F-ck Out of That.

Bounce the f-ck out of that negativity….

Bounce the f-ck away from those negative peep’s…

Bounce the f-ck out of that negative loop of assuming that someone is doing something to you…

Bounce the f-ck away from ANYTHING that does not feel good over the long haul in your life.

Now I know,
and I am reminded often,
that many feel that they cannot do this.

They have to stay put in the enviroment that they are in.
They have to.

Because, you see it is the responsible thing to do.

Are you this person who believes that you are captured in the the job,
the relationship,
the house,
the financial situation,
the sexless life,
or the just getting by and existing?

Is this your reality?
Are you lacking turn on for life?
YOUR LIFE?

I fully understand.
About a decade ago, I felt this way in all the above areas and more. I felt completely lost in my life.

I hated where I was living,
I had hardly any close relationships outside of my immediate family ( my husband and children).
I hated my body.
I hated my financial picture. ( If you can call it a picture, it was more like a nightmare)
I had no purpose,
no passion.
No orgasm in the bedroom or outside of it.

I was scared shitless every day that I woke up and I had no hope of getting out of the situation.
I sunk into the deepest depression of my life,
not wanting to wake to even care for my five children any longer.
I weeped constantly,
drank far to much,
blended codeine with booze just to escape my world.

Sleep seemed like the best option on most days,
but I never had the time for it.

I felt trapped with no way to escape and the well I was in just kept getting deeper.

Yeppers that was a decade ago.
Just a little over.
12 years to be exact.

People would tell me to be grateful.
People would tell me that in order to be responsible and a good parent,
a good person even,
that one had to compromise of themselves.
Do whatever it takes.

The man I think of like a father,
told me one day on my front porch in one of my deepest moments, “When you chose to have kids, you decided right then to stop doing what you want. You can’t have what you want when you have kids. You gotta be responsible and put them first.”

I wanted to puke when he said this.
I agree,
that family,
our children for sure come first.
You don’t go out and drink, party and do silly shit when you have kids.
You think about your responsibilities,
and you make them a priority.
You pay your f-cking bills,
you take care of your family.

But do you have to compromise all of yourself?
All of your life?
All of your desires?
All of your joy?

NO the F-CK you DO NOT!

But you know what you MUST do?
That is,
IF you proclaim that you want that F-ck YES Life.
IF you claim that you want to have it all.
And keep it real.
God.
Family.
Business.
Everything Else.

Well you must BOUNCE the f-ck away from those negative things.

And here is the gig,
most of those negative things are right between your two ears.

It’s the thoughts your thinking.
And it’s the peep’s your hanging with.
Look at the vibe that you are living in.

You can easily tell where you are vibing at by what is showing up in your world.

And you can tell how you are vibing,
by the way that you FEEL.

Yes,
I just said that.

THE WAY THAT YOU FEEL.

12 years ago,
I felt like shit.
I thought negative thoughts.
I got support of those thoughts from the people in my life.
I looked only at the negative in my life,
and it just kept multipling.

I did not do the mindset exercises daily that I do today.
I did not work my ass off internally to create the internal enviroment that would give me the external enviroment that I wanted.

And when I did apply myself there,
I did not believe it.

Because I had practiced too many negative thoughts and my beliefs came from them.

SO I had to DECIDE.
I had to really get serious with the most important person in my life.

And that was not my children.
It was not my husband.
It was not any family or friend.
It was not my bank account.
Or any one I owed money too.

It was not even God.

It was ME.

I had to have a pow-wow with ME.
And DECIDE what I wanted.
And what it would feel like to have that.
I had to start acting from a place of already having it.

I had to start with creating more of the thoughts I would have if I was already where I wanted to be, then what I was comfortable thinking in my current situation.

I had to put myself into situations that felt weird.
Uncomfortable.

I had to brainwash myself into believing something different.

And that meant…

I had to…

Bounce the f-ck out of that negativity….

Bounce the f-ck away from those negative peep’s…

Bounce the f-ck out of that negative loop of assuming that someone is doing something to you…

Bounce the f-ck away from ANYTHING that does not feel good over the long haul in your life.

SO what did I have to compromise to have the F-ck Yes Life of today?

EVERYTHING.

Everything that I was comfortable with.
Because it was not in alignment to what I claimed I wanted.

So,
there you have it folks.

You want it.
But are you willing to have it?

It’s always your choice.
You manifest your life.

What do you choose to think about?
Feel like?
Focus on?
or who are you hanging with?

These are the things that lead you to one door or another.

As always,
Stop Existing & Start Living

Join me November 18-21st for my 3 day intensive online workshop.
Ass In The Sand – Facebook Live Workshop for Entrepreneurs Who Want It All
If you are an entrepreneur and you want to know how to take your biz from zero to $100k quickly, for real – then this intensive class is for you.
Pre-registration coming out this next week.
Look for it or message me to get on the pre-launch list.

Crazy F-cking Gratitude + One Wild Ride.

I am so f-cking grateful.

Are You ⁉️⁉️

I sure the f-ck am.
Today I was driving home from the furniture store where I was buying a new couch for my front room plus bedroom furniture for my munchkins jungle themed room that if I can swing will look like a mini Rainforest Cafe,

And as I was driving I found myself in total gratitude for so many things.

I also found myself laughing out loud,
alone in my car,
over how crazy my year has been.

I mean really f-cking crazy.

Anyone who has been following me know’s the tales of this year but if you are new to the story line,
LET ME CATCH YOU UP…..

Started the year tripling my income after coming out of 2017 with massive emotional stress of figuring out how best to support my aging mom with dementia and all that comes with that.

Then entered the month of love (February) with my heart getting crushed from a man I never thought could ever take me to the low’s that he did in saying good bye abruptly.

Turned around and got my heart and body crushed by my other main man ( as you may have figured out, I am a polyamorous sorta girl on some days or years, and these two gents were my two leading men).

Had a pushed move into a new home, which I manifested in less than three days.

Found myself in a new neighborhood.
New home.
72 hours after a shocking experience.

Then had to deal with a summer of custody issues,
legal battles.

And had to buy a new car.
Furnish a home.
Heal my body.
Stay afloat.
And keep on coaching my beloved clients.

In the process of all of this,
my three eldest children ( age 23, 21 and 19) who were living in Maui moved home and needed to stay with me.

My eldest daughter conceived her first baby while in Maui,
So through all of this,
walking my baby girl through pregnancy as well.

Friendships have been tested.
Intimate relationships have been tested,
some new ones have been birthed,
some old one’s have been reignited in different ways.

And at the end of this day,
I find myself sitting here at my new breakfast nook table,
with my house under construction,
furniture being delivered tomorrow,
my baby boys coming home to me tomorrow,
my house not upside down,
but merging with the energy that I want.

I find my romantic life,
not healed or longing for what was,
but ignited to what can be.
And excited about the souls that have entered my world.

I find myself looking at my family,
as it shrinks in one way,
and expands in another.
Some children move out,
some are here,
some come and go according to a schedule that just is right and best for them and the situation,
while a grand baby ( a baby boy 😊) grows in my daughters womb.

I look at my business,
in its ebbs and flows of this year,
that impress and scare me.
Not because of a low,
but because the low is far higher than my high of last year. 🔥🔥🔥

I look at my life.
I look at my life.
Awe..
Yes in awe.

And my eye’s tear up.
I still feel all of the pain,
all of the trauma.

There is still much to heal.
Much to let go of.

And I SMILE.
In gratitude.
I sit here.

Knowing how f-cking blessed I am.
In gratitude I sit here.
Because sometimes the path to something better,
is painful beyond measure.

Sometimes the path to what we truly desire,
Is birthed on a road of loss and turbulence.

Sometimes the things that will bring us fully into who we are meant to be,
only come about because we had to grow ourselves through the storm that we were lost in.

Sometimes,
Yes, sometimes….

(and so it is in life, that the sometimes is actually most of the time.)

But you know what makes it all better?
You know what can set one out from the crowd?
You know what keeps you in alignment to all that you want,
all that you desire,
all that you know is on the other side?

GRATITUDE.

#1 KEY SECRET to manifesting miracles.
Living a happy life.
Being turned on.
And having it all, even in the storm.

IS GRATITUDE.

I had gratitude the morning I looked in the bank and my account had $32k in it – OVER NIGHT.

I had the same gratitude when the man I was deeply in love with said his goodbyes.

I had the same gratitude when my partner physically assaulted me.

I had gratitude when I paid the attorney.
I had gratitude when an old lover said he wanted to see a smile on my face.
I had gratitude when a new lover shared his heart with me.
I had gratitude when a dear friend told me I am the reason he is alive.
I had gratitude when my friend screamed in her pain at me.
I had gratitude when my daughter told me I was going to be a grandma.
And I had gratitude as I crumbled under the stress.
As I looked in my kindergartner’s eye’s as he screamed how he hated me, when I told him he had to change schools.

And so many more moments over this year.

GRATITUDE.
I am f-cking grateful.

Are you?

I encourage you to take a moment RIGHT NOW,
write down 20 things that you are grateful for.

Read them 3x.
and then repeat this process every morning and every night for 30 days.

See what manifests in your life.
See how you feel about your life.

And as always,
Stop Existing & Start Living

Join me November 18-21st for my 3 day intensive online workshop.
Ass In The Sand – Facebook Live Workshop for Entrepreneurs Who Want It All
If you are an entrepreneur and you want to know how to take your biz from zero to $100k quickly, for real – then this intensive class is for you.
Pre-registration coming out this next week.
Look for it or message me to get on the pre-launch list.

Facebook jail and other shameful events of my week.

Facebook jail and other shameful events of my week.
 
Yeah so that happened folks.
I got put into facebook jail.
You know the place.
That suspends all your activity for 3 days,
which feels like two weeks.
 
Really I am not a facebook junkie,
but….
I might be on here a little bit.
And it is my primary social media platform for everything that I do,
so when I ended up in jail the other day,
I found myself questioning what to do with my life.
 
But first you may wonder why I got put in jail.
 
Right?
 
I am mean I am a good girl who NEVER does anything but follow societal norm and rules after all.
So how could I be tossed in jail?
 
LOL.
 
I pissed someone off in New York I think it was with my article from this Tuesday on oral sex and intimacy
 
And so the lock down happened.
I actually feel sorry for this soul as she obviously was highly offended by my article and took a great amount of time in her day to come research my posts and video’s, comment on them and bash me around when she was not a FB friend of mine or a follower of my page in any way.
She still could not stomach that somehow this post has showed up on her wall.
 
Anywho,
Enough of that.
 
What I ended up doing instead of sharing on Facebook, was even more shameful than my post.
 
I had wine two nights in a row with old lovers of mine.
I stayed out until 2-am, enjoying their company and basking in their masculine love.
 
I enjoyed some fantastic wine.
Laughed a bunch, with out care.
Snuggled.
Got a massage.
And forgot about the facebook slammer.
 
I turned around and had some great sex,
enjoyed multiple orgasms,
connected deeply with my lover.
Laughed some more.
And forgot about the facebook slammer.
 
I played with my children.
Enjoyed Halloween with my family.
As well as go cart races,
and back yard laser tag fun.
Food with friends.
And more laughter.
And yes,
as you can guess forgot about the facebook slammer.
 
I enjoyed wine with a friend and my daughter until the late night hours while we sat and created my two new mentor-ship programs for pre-launch in a few weeks.
 
I helped a friend push through on his business goals.
And helped 7 clients take steps toward their dreams,
with tears streaming down their faces in gratitude.
 
I spent time with both my baby daddies,
and I did it in love and in peace.
Enjoyed my moments.
And I laughed.
 
Oh, and I almost forgot….
I cleared almost $8,000 in the 72 hours of slammer time.
 
So there was my shameful few days while in Facebook jail.
Jail that I was put in because someone in another state that does not follow me, is not friends with me, and has no freakin’ clue anything about me or my coaching,
 
has SHAME of their own.
So deep the shame that they felt victimized by a picture and some words that came across their feed.
 
That they felt they were being attacked.
And so they were.
But not by me.
Not by anyone.
They had choices to feel the shame,
and blame with pointing fingers.
Or to feel the shame,
and laugh at it’s silliness.
It’s illusion.
Because shame is just that.
An illusion.
 
And folks,
this week, for me,
has been built on my old wounds from shame.
I have had to face my old shame programs daily.
I have been shamed by my children,
by friends and by foe’s,
by my ex’s and even by Facebook.
 
But in the end,
all that shame,
is NOTHING.
Nothing but an illusion to my truth.
Just like your shame is an illusion to your truth.
 
Shame covers our light,
in hopes that we will fear an outcome,
that we will fear what other’s perceive of us.
 
Shame hides us from our truth.
That we are brilliant.
That we are beautiful.
That we are strong.
And that we can be-do-have our dreams.
 
Shame, shames us in order to prevent us from reaching our goals.
 
But it only win’s,
If we…
If YOU….
BELIEVE it.
 
Instead of believing the shame,
try living life,
find your joy.
Find your turn on.
And laugh in the face of shame.
 
Then brace yourself,
because shame will never stop.
It is a fierce force of fear,
it will try and shame even your joy.
Your laughter.
Your smile.
Your kindness.
Your orgasm.
Your power.
Your every breath,
if you will let it.
 
Just remember though…
You are the BOSS.
 
And as always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
 
Join me November 18-21st for my 3 day intensive online workshop.
Ass In The Sand – Facebook Live Workshop for Entrepreneurs Who Want It All
 
If you are an entrepreneur and you want to know how to take your biz from zero to $100k quickly, for real – then this intensive class is for you.
 
Pre-registration coming out this next week.
Look for it or message me to get on the pre-launch list.

How Eating Pussy After You Cum Builds Intimacy.

He came hard and strong.
He came deep and long.
He vibrated my whole body with his orgasm and carried me deeper into my own.
My pussy twitched, squeezed and swallowed him up with her orgasmic sucking of his cum.
My heart raced,
as he pushed deeper,
pressing up against my cervix,
opening her,
quivers, convulsions, followed by moans.
The wetness intensified,
and he softened.
Still stroking,
allowing me to ride my own orgasmic wave,
as his cock relaxed within my warm embrace.
Together we breathe deep.
Hearts racing.
We kiss.
Without notice he moves in hast downward,
devouring me with his mouth.
Spreading open my legs,
his lips,
his tongue,
sucking, kissing and enjoying the cocktail of our juices together that flow from my flesh.
My pussy ignites at the comfort that he enjoys this with.
Teasing my clit,
nursing softly on her even,
as he penetrates my pussy with his fingers and licks her soft lips.
For a moment, my mind wonders,
panics even,
in fear that he will not be okay with our blended juices,
and will step away from me, leave me here on the verge of vulnerability.
Here where my body is opening and craving more.
But then I find myself in gratitude,
in love even with his confidence,
his comfort in himself,
as a man,
in our sex,
and with my body.
He does not stray away from the moment,
but instead hungers toward it.
His strength in his own acceptance is powerful,
is beautiful and refreshing.
He heals my soul and my sex at a deeper level in this moment without even realizing it.
The lesson he shares with me is to love yourself.
Accept yourself.
And with this acceptance of self,
others too will embrace and accept you at a deeper level.

Yes.
Yes.
Here is what we crave as humans.
Here is what we all want.
Acceptance.
Connection.
To be able to be raw, real and ourselves.
And to be embraced this way.

But how do we truly achieve acceptance in life,
with other human beings?
With our lovers?

We do it by accepting ourselves.
We do it by embracing ourselves.
We do it by being real and raw with who we are.
And learning to love our flaws,
our humanness.
We do it by being turned on to connection.

I hear from many people,
“I want depth in a realtionship.”
” I don’t want sex to just be friction. I want to be felt, seen and to really feel and see my partner”
” I want to feel love and connection.”
” I just wish I could be accepted for who I am.”

You will never have these things.
IF – You are not first accepting yourself.
and
IF – you are not truly turned on to connection.

What do I mean by turned on to connection?
Turned on to connection means that you need to actually appreciate, accept and even enjoy other human beings.
You need to WANT to connect.
Not just say that you want it and then turn around and bitch about it.
Or claim that you hate people.
If you hate people,
then how do you ever expect to have any of the above things?
If you hate people, then you more than likely are highly judgmental of people and thus of yourself,
which leads us back to self acceptance.

And if you cannot accept yourself fully,
then you will never be able to accept another.

Which will leave a feeling with others that you are judging them.
Because you are.

In our sex,
we are most critical,
judgmental,
and fearful of our humanness.
We fear that which we desire the most.
because it shows our humanness.
Our flaws.

My share above about an experience with a lover is one that I bring up because I have experienced the direct opposite as well.

Years ago, I had a lover that turned me on in so many amazing ways,
his scent,
his flavor,
his kiss,
his smile,
his voice,
his personality,
his body.

All were yummie as f-ck.
I could devour the man for hours if he would let me.
But then would come the moment where I might take him in my mouth and enjoy giving him pleasure. Afterward, my desire to be snuggled and kissed were high and I would lean into these, he on the reverse side would lean away.

Avoiding the post blow job kiss.
Avoiding the post sex snuggle.
Even if he had not cum in my mouth he was challenged by the fact that his cock had been there and would no longer deeply kiss me.
In our sex, after he came, he would retract himself quickly from my body,
he would never venture downward to make sure that I was fulfilled,
and he would want to shower afterward.

Any one of these things, let alone all of them together revealed a deep intimacy issue and acceptance issue.

Not with me primarily, although that was the side effect.
But with himself.

Never allowing him to fully embrace the beauty and turn on of what our relationship could have been and offered.

The end result was a break up.
And why?
Because his disconnect to himself created a space that left me feeling it was not safe to surrender to him,
that he found me nasty in some fashion,
and that our sex was not about connection or love,
not even healthy play and f-ck buddies,
but that I was just a masturbation toy to him,
a piece of meat,
that he used and then was disgusted by.

I felt like I was far from accepted.
I felt disgusting.

Yet, with other lovers like the one above,
where he embraced us both,
remained turned on throughout our whole experience,
and accepted us both in all our humanness,
left me feeling beautiful,
turned on,
wanting him more,
and open.

Here is intimacy.
Here is authenticity.
Here is love,
first with self, then with another.

And the ONLY way to have it….
Acceptance of self.

No matter what you may be desiring in life,
the first step toward it is based in this truth.
If we can not accept who we are,
then we do not really know ourselves either.
Therefore, we cannot move forward in soul alignment.
And we will not achieve our desired life.
Have our desired relationships.
Or enjoy the F-ck YES! Life that we crave at our core.

Take this moment to STOP and appreciate yourself.
Look in a mirror,
really look,
deep into your own eye’s,
tell yourself that you love yourself.
Notice where your self- criticisms come up, ‘where you harbor pain, anger, frustration about yourself,
and just lean into it with love.

Embrace yourself fully and life will embrace you.

As always,
Stop Existing & Start Living

For more coaching, truth shares and awakened education join me for 1+1 coaching via phone, zoom or in person. Or follow me on Facebook for my morning FREE Conscious Coffee Broadcasts where I share truth bombs and alignment asskickery.

Why Things Are Not Manifesting For You: You Are Missing This Most Likely

The comment that rings loud to me from today is, “You can see who is in integrity. You cannot manifest over $22k overnight if you are not!”

Yes this comment.

So true is the statement that I knew I had to share it.
If you question WHY things are not happening for you in your manifestation process,
look no further than your integrity.

Integrity is key.

It is integrity with soul.
It is integrity with God.

And it is integrity with the world around us and the people in our lives.

We cannot manifest at the levels of blessing that we are intended to out of integrity unless we do so with a darkness attached which will only posses us somewhere down the road.

And cast ill karma onto our lives.

If you want clean manifestation that comes with ease and massive flow,
then you must not try and by pass the key component of integrity.

You must stand clear within yourself.
Clear within your relations with others.
You must listen to your soul and stop the actions of ego.

It may seem like it would be an easy thing to do.
After all,
all you are being asked to do is to stand in your own truth and speak it. Act it. and show up for and in it.

But the reality is that we humans love drama.
We are addicted to drama.
And we bask in our suffering.

It may sound sick,
and it is.

However, it still is human nature to do just this.
So we create our stories,
we share our tales,
and we devour the attention they bring us.

never realizing that we are sacrificing all of our dreams and desires,
our souls mission,
for this fraction of “feeling alive” through self created drama for attention.

Sad but true.

Many a time,
we find ourselves acting from the place of our inner fearful, self-centered bratty twelve year old state.
We throw our fit.
We beg for understanding.
We stop and we demand.
We point fingers in blame.
And we tell more tales in hopes of gaining a compassionate ear.

Weaving these tales until we can no longer find ourselves,
we continue on this spinning drama cycle where when we finally stop to breathe,
we meet reality.

The harsh back hand of reality swings over our lives and screams for us to wake up.

Our world has crumbled.
We are in the wreckage alone.
The power is still ours.
It has always been ours.

But we must face our addiction,
we must put down the need to feed on the drama.
If we ever want the opportunity to manifest the blessings that God wants for our lives.

Here we stand.
Here we weep.
Here we must come,
battered and bruised from the wounding of the drama we self- inflicted and the lessons we refused to handle in love and grace.

The answer has not changed.
The answer still remains.

Integrity is key.

Standing strong in it we create our blessings.
We manifest our desired life.
Our F-ck Yes Life!

And we smile.

Without it we fall.
Our world crumbles with every touch of our hand.

And we weep in not understanding.

Not understanding that all we ever had to do was be in our truth,
step into our soul alignment.
And live from here.

Integrity.

Will you step into it with me?
Will you embrace your self blessing power?

Or will you turn away and continue to wonder why?

As always,
Stop Existing & Start Living

Join me for 5 Intensive Weeks in a LIVE Global Facebook Workshop Starting October 22nd, 2018. Where I show you how to Embrace Your Power and Claim Your Life. Learn how a single mom of seven developed the skills to go from fear and scarcity, making $17k a year to abundance and joy making a multi-six figure income a year.

I will be sharing mind shift strategies that I have adapted through the years to manifest the Freedom Based Life that I now live today.

Limited Workshop Spot’s due to the 1+1 Private Focus Sessions that come with this workshop.
Grab Your seat now for

Embrace Your Power – Claim Your Life
“5 Step’s to a Freedom Based Life”

The only question any morning is…

One of those mornings where it’s to freaking’ cold to get out of bed.

Where I just find myself not wanting to even venture to the bathroom to pee.

Brrrrrrr….

Talked Levi my 12 year old son into going downstairs and making mom coffee.
Such a sweet boy.
He made it, brought it up to bed side and kissed my forehead as he asked if he could snuggle after school with me some and then left to make it to class on time.

Yes it is one of those mornings.

It is one of those mornings, where I feel hormonal, tired and non-productive. My lower back is aching and my ovaries are screaming at me.

I can feel my energy drained even though I have not even started my day yet.

I can feel my temperament a little off as well.
I am sensitive.

Yes it is one of those mornings.

It is one of those mornings, where I lay here focusing in on my gratitude’s in life, on the blessings and the joys. I snuggle under my covers and think of all the beauty God has given me. The opportunity and the love.

I am grateful.
Yes it one of those mornings.

It is one of those mornings where my Our Family Wizard buzzes and I see that my baby daddy has messaged me bright and early, thinking our son is still ill like yesterday, I open the message to see what’s up and discover that I have a boundary being pushed on. That his desire is to control my world and dictate my day to me despite what I have already shared. My ego flares and my heart aches. Fear rises up inside of me as I feel suddenly overwhelmed and lost in life.

Yes it is one of those mornings.

Brrrrr….

It is a day of turning inward.
It is a day of standing up.
It is a day of honoring my body.
It is a day to remain present.

Like every day.
It is a day in life.

And the truth behind today,
is nothing greater than the truth of yesterday or a day last week or last year.

It is just a day.

Perhaps you have noticed that in life we are always offered many options as to how our day will unfold.
Thus how our week,
our month,
our year
and our lives,
will unfold.

It comes down to the thoughts we choose to attach too.
It comes down to the games we decide to enter into with our ego’s.
It comes down to what we choose to focus on.

This is what makes all the difference.

I am often asked, ” But how do I stop thinking about this or that? It’s so bad, so stressful. It worries me. I am fearful of it.I cannot just not think about it.”

No you may not be able to stop the thoughts from coming through.
You may still feel the concern, the worry, the fear.
But here is the truth,
YOU and ONLY YOU make the choice to focus on it or not.
You are the one who chooses to attach to that thought, to that emotion and allow it to guide and even control your actions, your future thoughts, your future feelings and your life.

If you want to live a Freedom Based Life,
If you want to wake up every morning and feel in charge and in harmony with life,
In flow with your life and purpose.
And most importantly in love with who you are and where you are.

Then you must let go of the need to attach to these unsupportive thoughts.

You must let go of the idea that you are a victim to the thoughts.

Or a victim to anything.
You must let go of the idea that someone else or something outside of yourself has any control of how you choose to show in life,
to feel,
to think.

If you want a F-ck Yes Life!

And baby you deserve this.
Then you HAVE to LET GO!
You have to KNOW that the only thing you can ever do,
is stay present and do everything within your power to focus on what makes you feel good.

This is your ONLY work.

So yes….

It is one of those mornings.
It is a morning of snuggles,
a morning of sweet gestures,
a morning of love and kindness,

It is a morning of hormones,
of back aches and fatigue,
a morning of frustration,
of ego trying grab hold,

It is a morning of gratitude.
It is a morning of power.
It is a morning of self-love and acceptance.

It is a morning where once again the opportunity to Claim the life we want is at our bedside.

The only thing to decide this morning is,
Am I F-ck YES or a F-ck NO.

Will You Embrace Your Power and Claim Your Freedom Based Life?

As always,
Stop Existing & Start Living

Join me for 5 Intensive Weeks in a LIVE Global Facebook Workshop Starting October 22nd, 2018. Where I show you how to Embrace Your Power and Claim Your Life. Learn how a single mom of seven developed the skills to go from fear and scarcity, making $17k a year to abundance and joy making a multi-six figure income a year.

I will be sharing mind shift strategies that I have adapted through the years to manifest the Freedom Based Life that I now live today.

Limited Workshop Spot’s due to the 1+1 Private Focus Sessions that come with this workshop.
Grab Your seat now for

Embrace Your Power – Claim Your Life
“5 Step’s to a Freedom Based Life”