Bored with Yourself? Here is How To Tell.

Oh girl you look out into your life and you just feel no sizzle.
You just feel little excitement.
You think to yourself,
why?
As you look around and you see all this good shit happening but it just seems sorta boring.
You know what I mean.
The more comfortable you seem to get the more average and ordinary tends to seep into your daily life and practices.
And the more average your life is,
the more it looses its luster.
But that’s what you have wanted for so long…

NOT the average.
NOT the ordinary.
F-ck NO!!!!!
Never!

But you want the comfort.
The stability.

And now you have it.
So now what?

There is not a whole lot happening is there?
There is just your daily tasks.
That thousand long list of things to get done.
The bills to pay,
and they are on auto pilot so no real interaction there.
They just seem to happen.
Your kids come and go from school.
There is the grocery shopping.
The sports events.
Choir.
The gym.
Woohoo!!!

Oh yeah, there is this guy or that guy.
You know the one’s that hold your attention for a second.
Or even longer.
They are great…
Sometimes.
They are sweet and all wrapped up in you.
But seriously…

You are bored!
You are F-CKING BORED with BEING YOU.

And it is showing up in how you react to experiences.
It is revealing itself in how you choose to show up each day of your life.
It is making itself know in your lack of orgasmic sex,
your lack of depth and surface level blah blah in intimacy…

HaHa… Intimacy.

What is that these days?
It is nothing.
Because you are bored with the level of life that you have been allowing yourself to play at.

You are lusterless.
You are not shining.
You are dull.
And YOU my beautiful are the ONLY mother f-cker that can do anything about it.

It’s high f-cking time that you STOP accepting so little from yourself.
You know you have so much more inside of you.
You know that your voice was meant to be heard.
That your words were meant to touch millions.
You know that you get things at a different level than most.
And this is your effing SUPER POWER.

Yet you keep choosing to play is safe.
To focus on stability.
To be comfortable.
And that is leaving you with this bland taste in your mouth.
It is leaving you wanting for more.
And what once seemed like so much to desire,
now is nothing.
And you are almost ready to shake the boat and if you have to,
tip the mother f-cking thing over so that you can clean yourself off from all of the shit that you have been feeding yourself and crap that you have been living.

Because you were born for so much more.
And many say that they are,
but few actually believe it to a level to do something with it.
To actually make a mother f-cking decision to and CLAIM IT.

And this has somehow become you.
But it hurts.
It is agonizing at a deep soul level.
As it should be.

You know too much.
You understand too much.
You have see the magic that life has to offer.
And you KNOW YOUR POWER.

Turning your back on your power and on your core,
stepping out of your SOULS light is what is causing all this muckiness in your energy.

So just stop it already!

Yes you are bored.
Yes you are bored with yourself.
Yes you are too comfortable.
Even in the bad shit, you are comfortable.
Yes ALLOWING who you really are to be seen is scary.
Yes you want it and you doubt.
But YOU KNOW.

And if you know then all you need do is SAY F-CK YES!!!!! To YOU.

So what is holding you back beautiful?
This comfort of average and ordinary.
This entrapment of what you have.
The fear of loosing what you have so far,
OR….
of becoming EVERYTHING you WANT?

I double dog dare ( yes I just said that… because our 4th grade selves had it right about something, DARE…)
you to SHINE.
To fully step into who you are and stop accepting this piss poor version of you.
Because sure it may feel safer to linger here and be real nice and comfortable,
but I promise you this,
it won’t last.
Because what you are not aware of is that reality that in your comfort you are also fearful of loosing it all.
And this fear will out weigh everything else and make itself a reality.

At the end of the day,
you might as well just step the f-ck up and claim what you want,
take the risk to loose it by asking for it all,
then sitting around and spinning on your average and ordinary f-cking thumbs and loosing it anyway,
because honey,
that is what can happen.
And does OFTEN.
We get stable.
We start to play it safe.
Too safe.
And we get comfortable.
We settle.
And we start to take it all for granted.
Then we fear loosing it.
And BAM as if someone cast some magic spell on us or cursed us,
it is all gone.

But you my love have a choice.
You can grab this magic moment and you can step all the f-ck in on your life.
Without hesitation.
You can get CLEAR.
NOW.

You can set the tone of your day.
Of your mood.
Your week.
And your whole life.
But playing small,
playing safe,
is for those who are pansies.
Who enjoy the average and ordinary,
not YOU!

Your soul wants to take that dare.
It wants to show itself off.
Stand out.
Be BRIGHT.
STUNNING like the diamond that it is.
And it wants it all NOW.

Your SOUL does not need faith.
It resides in the greatness of the eternal.
It KNOWS its power.
Its purpose.

Will you follow your SOULS LEAD?
Claim Your Life Today.

And as always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

Don’t wait another one, two, five, ten years to start THRIVING.
Make 2019 the year of you claiming YOU.
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So You Want Me To Coach You.

Ouch!
Ouch!
Ouch!
Alright.
I get it.
Really I do.
I know that I don’t act like I do.
I know that these lessons just keep knocking me in the head,
year after year,
but truly I get it.
I just cannot seem to act on it.
I try.
REALLY I DO.
I mean I do the work.
I do it daily.
I faithfully do it.
I think I am showing up.
I think I am in living in alignment to my soul.
I think I am authentic.
But ya know,
things just are not coming through the way that I hoped.
The money is not washing in like a great river yet.
My body still feels fatigued and overwhelmed.
My mind has a lot in it.
I mean look at all that is on my plate.
I have so much responsibility.
Half the time I don’t know what end is up.
I have success.
I have some really sh*t in my life.
And I stay focused on my gratitude for it all.
But I feel like I really have to struggle to get anything to manifest.
I have to make it happen,
and if I pause to try and enjoy my life at all,
then everything that I have been working so hard at just crashes.
It is ridiculous really.
Why even bother.
Why do I work so damn hard if it all can be washed up into nothing overnight pretty much?
Oh gosh gally geeze,
I cannot help it though.
There is this pull inside of me.
This desire for something more.
It is like I am forever hungry and no matter how much I consume I wan for more.
I am being pulled this way,
but it scares me.
It terrifies me.
I don’t think that I am ready.
I mean do I know enough?
Am I good enough?
Can I really live that life?
You ask me what it would be like if I just stopped living in accordance to everyone else’s expectations and opinions of what I should be doing?
You ask me what I truly believe about myself and my life at my core?
And I shake inside.
And yet cannot grasp the sensation of what it would be like if I just let go of what everyone else wanted of me.
How could I do that?
Wouldn’t that be wrong in some fashion?
Make me a bad person?
Sh*t IDK….
It feels good.
It does.
But it also rattles me.
It feels so strange.
You make it all seem so simple.
It has to be harder than this.
Right?
I mean how can it be this effing simple?
And yet I watch you.
I watch so many others live,
no not just live but THRIVE and they seem to do it with hardly any effort.
No struggle.
It is just them.
To THRIVE.
Everything flows to them.
They have lady luck on their side without a doubt.
God favors them.
And then there are those of us who work our a*sses off,
day in and day out.
Living for the weekends.
Our holidays and bonuses.
And we wake up with struggle on our mind,
fearful of what will happen in our day.
With our work.
With our spouses.
Our children.
Our health.
and we fear the day.
But then,
I look….
I look out and I see you.
I see you in ease THRIVING.
How can this be?
How do you do it all with such grace,
such love,
in joy and abundance always.
Why do things just seem to come to you?
Is it really as simple as you share in our work together?
Can I really have it too?
And quickly?
Okay,
I get it.
Okay, not really.
But I want too.
I desire change.
I want to be coachable.
I will surrender to the process and I will not just do the work externally,
I will be absorbed by it.
I will breathe it.
I will soften into myself,
in faith and I will allow myself to be seen more and more each day as you tell me too.
No longer will I hide my greatness out of fear of others thoughts.
No longer will I move in the shadows of my ego.
I will take your hand and let you lead me to all that i want.
Applying with certainty all that you share.
Yes.
Yes.
I get it.
Coachability.
Surrender.
Certainty.
Authenticity.
Yes I am ready.
Lead me.
Sign Me Up.
I CLAIM MY LIFE TODAY!
As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
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Awesome, then let’s get you on the FAST TRACK NOW.
WARNING: My coaching is not for the faint at core, 
the weak of spirit or heart. It is not for the one’s who want to point fingers.
No, my coaching is for the 1%ers who are wanting CLAIM their FULLNESS in LIFE.

You Make Me Want To Look Pretty

You make me want to look pretty.
You make me want to dress up and be my best in your presence.
You make me want to smile.
You make me want to be light in my heart.
Open.
and connected.
You make me want to be beautiful.
Because that is what I am.
I am all of this at my core love.
And I know that you can see it.
I know that you feel me at my deepest,
and that you hunger for me to give you more of myself.
You light me up.
You make me feel joyous.
You turn me on at a spiritual level.
You ignite my soul.
Your energy,
your support,
your words of encouragement,
the way you smile and say nothing at all.
You tell me that I am beautiful.
You make me want to reveal my all to you.
I want to spread my wings,
and let you in.
I want to be captured by the light that your eye’s reflect back to me.
I want all of this.
Because I am all of this.
And you see me.
You call me out in my dark hours.
You resist my attempts to hide my beauty.
You dig in my caves and you ask for more treasure.
And you know that it is treasure.
The treasure of my soul.
The treasure of my truth.
And you see me.
You are not blinded by the tales of others.
You are not hindered by the notions of the world around us.
No, you choose.
And you consistently choose,
to see me.
And for this my love,
You make me want to look pretty.
You make me want to dress up and be my best in your presence.
You make me want to smile.
You make me want to be light in my heart.
Open.
and connected.
You make me want to be beautiful.
I want to show you who I am.
I want you to feel me.
I want you to crave me.
To taste more of me.
I want to open,
open wide in love to you.
Because it is with your onlooking,
that I can see myself.
It is through your eye’s that I take down my masks.
The veils of my fear fall to the ground,
they are not needed,
in your embrace.
Yes, my love.
You have that way about you.
You have the presence.
The love.
The attention.
That my soul desires.
I want to suck you up and never let you go,
and I want you to do the same of me.
Absorb me love.
Hold me love.
And savor.
Because this is me.
This is my beauty.
This is my soul.
And it is naked before you.
asking for your presence.
Basking in your sight.
Becoming juicy at your touch.
Yes this my love is me.
And because you see me,
I am standing stronger.
Because the way that you look at me,
I know that you know me.
I know that you feel me.
I know that we are the same.
And so as I stand here,
eye to eye,
you look back from the mirror,
and you say,
” I love you. You are beautiful.”
And yes my love you are correct.
For this is me.
And this is you.
And we are one.
As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

Who’s Claiming You Love?

Well F-ck!
There you go again.
Chasing everything that you don’t want because you got caught up in everyone else’s stuff.

Thinking that, that is what you should do if you love them.

And what has happened to you love?
Oh, I know….
you lost yourself.

Yet again you forgot about the most important person in your life.

YOU.

You forgot to make time and space for you.

And look what has come of it.

Your world is in chaos.
Your exhausted and overwhelmed.
You are running on empty.

And as much as you want to point a finger outward,
and say that they made you do it.
Say that you had no choice.

You know that it is bullsh*t!

So what are you going to do about it?

You may want to put your head down and force your will.
You may want to fully retract yourself from everything and go into hiding.
You may think that you cannot stop this cycle and that you have to just keep on going.
You may still believe even that you need to do that.

But the reality,
is far from what you think it is love.
The reality is that it is HIGH time that you PAUSE and take a moment for YOU.

At all cost too.
Because the other cost’s are far too great if you let them manifest into existence.
I mean if you keep doing what you are doing,
what do you think will end up happening?

Suddenly things will change on their own?
Suddenly someone will stop everything and say, “Hey, no don’t keep doing all of this for me and everyone else, let me carry that for you, and you just go take a holiday for yourself…”

That is laughable.
And it won’t happen.
Because you are not allowing it to happen.
Because you somewhere in your crazy thinking and feeling believing that it cannot happen and that you don’t deserve it to happen,
even though at your core,
if you ask yourself what you truly want,
you may be shocked to discover that you believe and almost expect that someone will come save you from the choices that you are making and from the actions that you are taking and all that you are carrying.

And if you get really real with yourself you may even feel some anger or bitterness around this.
I mean look at all that you are doing for everyone else.
Right?

Seriously.
You do it all.
You carry all that load for everyone,
and surly they will notice.
Surely they will see it and want to say thank you.

Not just say thank you,
but REALLY say THANK YOU.

And then you will be happy!

Okay love,
this has got to sound a bit whacked to you.
I mean you know logically that it is not so.
You know that ONLY YOU can make the changes in your life that are needed.

I mean you get that you are responsible for your life.

I hope you do.

Because that is the only f-cking way out of this mess you have yourself in.
The only way out of it,
and the only way that you will be happy,
and feel confident, strong, and in love with your life and yourself is IF you,

YES YOU…

Claim your LIFE TODAY.
And claiming your life is more than just just talking about it.
It is actually meaning it at a deep SOUL LEVEL.
And then HONORING that and taking the steps that you are called to take despite everyone else.

As always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for grown A*s Believers”
www.kendalwilliams.com

Only One Person You Need To Be A YES Too.

You know you are beautiful.
Just the way that you are.
Yes you.
You are so freakin’ dynamic,
you are a powerhouse of abundance.
You are magnetic.
You are lucky as sh*t.
You are smart.
You are AMAZING.

And yet you doubt yourself.
You listen to what this world tells you,
about it’s fears.
About it’s expectations.
You listen as though those statements need to be your reality.
You listen and you wonder,
what is wrong with you?
Why is it so damn hard to connect with others?
Why do you still feel empty?
Why?
Why?

And you blame yourself for everything.
You feel responsible for everyone.
Always looking at how you can help more,
be more, give more, sacrifice more.
But it seem’s that no matter how much you give,
you still do not achieve what you want.

CONNECTION.
FULLNESS.
JOY.
ABUNDANCE in all things good.

You taste of these delicacies,
but they are fleeting.

They wrap themselves around you for moments in life,
but life is filled more with overwhelm, suffering,
struggle than all that you want.

WHY? You scream from the top of your lungs to God.
Are you not worthy?
Are you not enough?
Or are you too much for this world?
Perhaps too much for those in your world?

You sit and you think,
you over think.
You feel,
and you feel yucky about how you are showing up.
About how you are not being all you know that you are.
And you fear loosing your life.
The years pass so quickly.
You watch your children grow and become parents themselves.
You watch your own parents age.
And the clock just keeps ticking.

Life does not change.
Moments come and tease you.
But they only linger for a few breaths.
And then they are gone.

At your core you know this is not right.
At your core you feel that you have missed a turn.
That it should not be this way,
this hard.
You know that you were built for more.
You know that you were built to share a message,
to impact this world,
to teach your children through your living what life is to be like.
And it is NOT to be about paying bills and building companies for others.
It is not to be lived for the 5 o’clock hour.
Or holidays and weekends.

It is not for masking with drugs, alcohol, addictions and fear.

No.

Life is for LIVING.
Not surviving.

But THRIVING.

But how?
How does one thrive?

It’s simple my love.
It’s really freakin’ simple.
You get greedy.
You get selfish.
You become a YES not to this world and all of it’s inhabitants,
but to YOU!

You fall in love with yourself first before you go and try and find someone to fall in love with or to love you.

You get present and stop living in your past,
pulling it forward and recreating it for today.

You stop worrying about the future,
and get happy about your now.
Because your now is your future of yesterday.

Fill yourself up BABY.
Don’t wait to be filled.
Don’t wait for someone else to save you.
You don’t need saved.
You just need to open yourself up to your joy.
That thing that you have been hiding from all the while trying to be responsible and pay your bills and fit into the social norm.

I can tell you this love,
those who are focused on fitting into the social norm,
will never find all that you are looking for,
all that they are wanting.

No they will not.
They will only find more of everyone else’s troubles, ‘fears, judgments and hold themselves in the norm of surviving, but never THRIVING.

Yes Love,
you want it all.
Your soul wants you to have it.
God will support you.
And all you have to do….

Is CLAIM YOUR LIFE NOW.

SO what are you waiting for?

“Stop Existing & Start Living”
Coaching for Grown A*s Believers

*Now accepting applications for my VIP 1:1 F-ck YES! Life Coaching. Message me for deets.

You would be perfect if you were different.

 
“I love your strength.
I love your independence.
I love your drive.
I love your passion.
Your creativity.
Your intelligence.
Your sexiness.
Your playfulness.
Your beauty.
Your light.
 
You make me want to be a better person.
You make me feel so good.
You make me so happy,
so free and turned on to life.
I feel like I can do anything.
 
You are perfect.
I love you so much.
 
But why my love do you not answer me in the way that I desire?
Why do you not feel the way I wish you did about our love,
about our relationship?
Why my love are you so aloof at times?
Too busy…
Too busy for me.
 
Why do you flirt and play with others,
so carefree and unfazed?
With that smile.
That laugh.
That light shining so bright.
And not with me in that moment.
It’s like you don’t need me.
Does our love mean nothing to you?
 
 
When you are with me, the world is perfect.
When you are away from me my world is dark.
There is a void that is too much to bare and I feel like I am suffocating from its immense emptiness.
I fear I am not good enough.
That you want for something more.
I fear loosing you,
and so I wish that you were different.
Not in any of the ways that you are perfect.
 
No.
 
I want you to remain all of that.
But I want you to need more of me.
I want you to be by my side more.
To share more in each day.
I want you to focus just on us.
I want you to desire only my attention.
 
I don’t want you to take time away from us to be around another.
I don’t want you to ignore me in any way.
I don’t want you to flirt and play with others.
I don’t want you to get caught up in what you are doing and forget about me, if even for a day.
 
I need you to want me.
I need you to need me.
I need you to be here more for me.
I need you to value my emotions more.
I need you to make me happy all the time.
I need you to be what you are not.
 
You would be perfect if you were different.
But alas my love you are not.
And this makes me mad.
It makes me sad.
It makes me wish I did not exist on some days.
My heart hurts so bad.
I wish it would stop.
I wish that you understood my pain.
I wish you could feel my love more.
I wish that it mattered more to you.
I wish that you were different.”
 
How does this tale resonate with you my dear?
Can you feel the pain of the lovers heart.
How we humans desire for all these beautiful characteristics in our mates and want for them to want so much of us as well. To be our everything and us theirs.
 
We lay our emotions,
our moods and mental health into the arms of another.
Thinking that this is what love is.
If only they loved us then they would care enough to change their ways and be more of what we need.
They would bend over backward to make sure that we were stable in our vibration.
They would make sure to not rock our hearts.
They would make sure that they did what we needed.
If only they loved us the way we love them.
 
Right?
 
WRONG!
 
The above is nothing of love.
It is of addiction and need.
It is co-dependency at its finest.
And the sheer fact that we desire for all these beautiful characteristics from our mate but need them to be the opposite for us to “feel love” which is not love but need is revealing just how conditional our relationship truly is.
 
The feeling of love never comes from another.
It comes from the great love that each of us hold within us.
When we are in relationship, the relationship highlights that which has always been present within us.
When we turn this power over to the other person,
we become a victim to the ebb and flow of the others life and emotions. We disown ourselves and create an unhealthy relationship that is not based on love, but based on fear of loss of the relationship.
 
When we look to our relationship for security in life,
for our source of joy, peace, happiness or love, we deny ourselves of our truth and we are not in soul alignment.
The fear of loss is signal to this fact.
When we are feeling worry about loosing,
fear about not being good enough,
or a neediness of another we are not standing in our own power. Thus being a victim to the moment. The relationship and our expectations of what we have come to call our relationship reality or norm.
 
And so we focus in on what the other is not giving us.
We become determined to fix it.
To fix them.
To make them understand.
Because if they love us then they will want to do this.
 
The issue is that a consciously aware, embodied person who is turned on to life and in love with themselves and thus stable in who they are cannot become a person living from this other state of being without destroying who they are and becoming something else.
 
They must remain true to who they are.
And this truth is what makes them:
Strong
Independent.
Driven.
Passionate.
Creative.
Intelligent.
Sexy.
Playful.
Beautiful.
Lit Up.
 
It’s what makes them SOULFUL.
And makes you feel like you can conquer the world when they are in yours.
 
In order to keep a soulful person in your life,
the only answer is to BECOME ONE YOURSELF.
 
Which means to get selfish.
And fall in love with your beautiful self.
See your power and STOP giving it away.
Stop being needy, and dependent on anyone to “make you happy.”
Stop masking your sh*t and do your internal work.
Your soul work.
Get right with who you are.
Because YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL MY LOVE.
 
Claim Your Life Today!
 
“Stop Existing & Start Living”
 
Message me for deets on my VIP Coaching to Live Your F*ck Yes! Life NOW!

True Reflections.

I don’t think you are where you think you are.

Ya know?

I mean you sit there and share with me everything that you want. 
You tell me how talented, skilled and gifted you are. 
You tell me how you understand the laws of the universe. 
You tell me how much you know you must take that leap into your calling.

And yet in the same sentence you tell me how you are not worthy. 
How you still HAVE to go through these challenges.
You tell me this and that. 
And you are correct on all of it.

But I find myself questioning, 
I question if you hear all that you share.
Do you hear your fear of change?
Do you hear how badly your soul wants more?
Do you hear the fact that you are pulling the trigger, when you keep denying all that you can be?

Yes. 
You, 
and only you are the one. 
And I tell you this as your friend, 
as your sister, 
as your lover, 
as one who is walking this path with you, 
step by step, 
you my dear are not where you think you are.

None of us are.
And yet we are.
We are where we are, 
and it perfect right where we are.

But your perception my love, 
is off kilter. 
In so many ways you see yourself in a light that you have not yet opened too. It is within you, 
but you have not embodied it. 
Therefore, you are not there.

You are still hiding in your own shadow.
You are still wondering through the woods of your chaotic fears and thoughts. 
Justifying each step as a lesson. 
A lesson that you believe you must learn, 
that you must move through, 
in order to be worthy of stepping on your path.
And all you ever need to do, 
is look at where your feet have already landed.

There my love. 
Look where you stand, 
and you will see that you are not lost.
You are not too small, 
or too much, 
to weak, 
or unworthy.

No. 
You my love, 
are already standing on your path. 
There is nothing more that you must do, 
to receive all that you crave.

You are ready.

Yes you are.

The only thing that is holding you, 
is your fear of saying yes.

Yes to all that you desire. 
Yes to all that you can be. 
Yes to all that this world wants from you.
Yes to all.
To all that you know.

You are there my love, 
you are right there at the gates of everything.

And yet you do not see.
You do not believe. 
You insist instead that you are somewhere else, 
and that your path is still to be found. 
That you must search, 
that you are lost, 
that you , 
that you, 
that you……

Cannot have.
But assure me in affirmations, 
that you know all that you need. 
That you are a creator of your life.
That you can manifest with ease.
And that you know the steps that you must take.

And there you are, 
sitting there, 
with that lost look in your eye’s, 
that fear in your heart, 
and a smile on your face.

You hope that no one see’s.
But the stench of your illusion wafts through the room.
And the sweat on your brow, 
shares more than a heat in your groin.

You are stuck my love, 
you are stuck, 
and you must know the truth. 
The truth of how to unstick what is not glued.

Your TRUTH.
Your VOICE.

Unstick what is not glued, 
by standing up, 
on your soap box, 
and speak it loud.
Preach it to the empty room, 
and as you preach , 
they will hear, 
they will come, 
and they will follow. 
Your message my dear one, 
is one that needs to be shared.
It is a covenant with God, 
to share it, 
share yourself, 
authentically, unapologetically and with boldness.

Here my love.
Here you are.
Here, 
right here, 
in the mirror. 
The mirror of your life, 
of your message, 
and on your path.

Now STEP.
Step into your greatness my love.

And say F-ck Yes!

As Always, 
Stop Existing & Start Living

Start 2019 off with a swift asskick into your desires and success in achieving them. 
Explore the F-ck Yes Life Now!

The Ego of Prayer

“I’ve been praying.

I have been praying but it does not seem that my prayers are being heard.

They must be falling on deaf ears, or heaven has shut its gates to my plea.
I am in such need.

I am fearful, scared, and uncertain.


I have fallen to my knees, each and every night.

And asked for guidance, through this difficult time.


I’ve been praying.Lord, please help me.”


You may never want to read my words again, after you read this post.
Just a simple FYI.


I am going to preface this with, I am not condemning prayer.

I am not saying anything of the sort.


PRAYER is POWERFUL.

Prayer is wonderful.

Prayer is NEEDED.


However much like anything though,  it is best when done in perfection,  or as close to it as we can get.


And that is not to say that we cannot be human in our prayer and mess the eff up here and there.


But in order for us to get the answers that we desire,

which is WHY WE PRAY to begin with,

then we MUST do prayer right.


Proper prayer,

is not about the way you fold your hands,

or bow before an alter.


It is not about where you choose to go to pray,

or what faith you choose to follow.


It is not about the forgiveness of sins,

or the asking of such even.


Proper prayer,

is simply about VIBRATION.


When we pray we do so from fear.

We pray from a place of brokenness.

We pray from a belief that we do not have,

that we have done something to deserve this suffering,

that we are not worthy, and MUST ask for forgiveness.

That we must cower before the alter of our choice,

and we must make ourselves small.


We believe that whatever we are needing,

wanting or crying out for is not within our scope.


And so we pray.

We pray for help.


And this sweet one, is not the energy of God. This is not the energy of the divine..

This is not in love or of love.
This sort of prayer is one based in inverted pride.

Therefore ego.


No,this is not how God desires his people to show up.


This is not how we show off God’s power.

Through begging.

Through suffering.

Through bartering.


Eff…. NO!
Proper prayer….

Proper prayer, as stated before is all about VIBRATION.


And vibration starts with your thinking.

Then your feeling.

Yes your emotions that are attached to those thoughts.


Proper prayer should ALWAYS be a prayer of GRATITUDE.


Find gratitude in the things that you have around you,

even if your life is sh*t.


Find gratitude in the life you have been given,

even if you are scared, suffering and lost.


Find gratitude in your struggle,

because it shows you where your work is at.


And that work that it is showing you is nothing more than a change in VIBRATION.


Gratitude is the ONLY proper prayer

.As any other will only lead you to further low vibe thoughts, fears, and concerns.

Thus you will embody suffering through the emotions that you feel based on this belief that it is out of your grasp to be FRUITFUL.


Prayer is about turning it over.

Showing your FAITH.And LETTING GO to GOD.


We do not let go, when we are attaching our inverted pride to any situation. Instead we are owning victimhood and a scarcity mindset.


In order for us to live in grace, abundance and joy, we must let go of our need to control through our fears and wounding.


Thus making every prayer a PRAYER OF GRATITUDE instead of FEAR.


Let God’s power show through you,

by leveling up your prayer life,

and step into CERTAINTY,

where all things are possible,

because God is GREAT.


This is the life of a believer.

And a prayer achiever.


Your VIBE Dictates Your Prayer.


As always, Stop Existing & Start Living


If you are ready to make the leap then reach out to me today. I am running a Christmas special where you get 2-months of coaching for FREE. Check it out and use the SANTAGIFT code in the why you want to work with me HERE

Sex, Love and Fear.

Snuggles.
Intimacy.
Kisses.
Time shared.
SEX!

Mmmmmmmm….. sounds good, huh?
Sounds like something you want.
That you desire more of in your life.
Me too!

I sit here this morning contemplating so many things,
and I often find myself excavating past lessons so that I do not repeat them in current time and space.
As I analyze things, especially how I choose to do relationship I see how difficult I might be to have a serious one with.
And I do not believe that it is the fact that I enjoy multiple people in my life that is the difficult thing.
What is difficult for most is my integrity about it.
I share openly about my feelings.
About my past.
About my desires.
I share how I feel.

The issue is that we are taught that we should not want anything more than the relationship we have.
That the relationship we have is to complete us,
to make us happy, and to provide all our needs.
If it does not then under no conditions should you turn to someone else to get this met.
ESPECIALLY someone you may be attracted too or them to you.

I hear the statement,
” Be cautious of the situation you put yourself in.”

I hear the concern in this statement.
I hear the plea of if you hang around people you like, are attracted too then you may stray,
and straying equates to you leaving.
Because you have to make a choice.
Because there is ONLY so much love to go around.
Because you cannot have multiple relationships successfully.
Because it makes ME uncomfortable.

Okay, here is where I get a little uncomfortable.
Uncomfortable in my truth.

My truth is that I can NEVER go back to a way of living where I shut myself down from the world,
from other people,
and/or from men.
I f-cking love my male friends and lovers.
Whether current lovers of not, I may be enjoying time with them.
And when it is imposed on me that I need to not do this,
I feel shackles being put on me and on my emotions,
my heart,
my desires,
my energy.
And YES you better believe I will be making a choice.

I am poly my nature.
In all things I do.

I do love many.
I do enjoy many.
And may be likely to have intimacies in multiple ways with a few.

The one’s who capture my heart,
capture my essence for a season of our lives dancing together,
are the one’s who are confident enough in themselves and who get the difference between love and need.
Who can embrace my feminine wave of love.
These are the ones or THE ONE that will hold me a lifetime.

Now I am not speaking on sex here.
When I say intimacy,
I mean depth in revealing.
Sex can be this intimacy,
however sexing will only be as deep and intimate as we allow ourselves to be revealed in it.
Sex can just be that, sex.
It can be friction based and meaningless.

Sex does not mean love.
Sex does not mean commitment.
Sex does not mean intimacy.

Sex is a communication tool,
a physical communication tool .
And if you show up at only a surface level in your daily interactions with a lover,
then your sexing will only mimic the same.
Surface sex.
If you have depth, intimacy, surrender, authenticity in your daily interactions then your sex can go to this level as well,
or it can still be held in a place of disconnect if we are letting everything be heard in other ways but are scared to speak our truth in the bedroom.

Sex DOES NOT mean intimacy.
or love.

It can however deepen our intimacy and love.
It all depends on our level of surrender with our partner.

In the land of poly,
many believe that poly means to have multiple sexual partners. But this is not true,
poly is about something much more frightening than sex.
It is about LOVE.

Loving multiples.
And in love we can go deep with someone,
and we might open the gateway to sex.
Good sex.
Might I even say gourmet sex?
Because of the love,
because of the more authentic relating.

But poly DOES NOT equate to sex,
lot’s of sex,
or sex with many.

You can be monogamous in your sexing, 
and polyamorous in your relating and intimacy sharing.

And you can have success in this.
Just like you can have success in an open relationship with open sexing, or a swinging relationship.
Just like you can have success in a monogamous relationship.

A successful relationship is not about the sexual labels you put on it.

It is based on the confidence that each party has in themselves first, the self-love they have, and their ability to show up authentically in the realtionship. Which means authentic communication.

Year spent together does not equate a successful relationship.

Happiness does.
Unconditional love, and forward moving growth,
individually and together gives you opportunity to have this.

The most happy people on the planet are the one’s who have multiple close relationships. The healthiest people are the same.
Healthy mentally, emotionally and physically.
All requires intimacy shared.

Closing yourself off to the world is a death sentence in an essence.

Closing yourself off to the world and ONLY allowing intimacy to be shared with but ONE is putting all your eggs in one basket and putting an unrealistic expectation on the ONE. As well, as expecting that you as an individual can survive with only this one food source.

Because relationships are food.
They are emotional, mental, spiritual food.
They effect our body, mind and soul.
They impact us at a deep level.
And not having them does not mean that we are not effected.
Avoidance of relationship DOES equate avoidance of your heart and soul.
It is hiding from all the intimacy and truth that you are meant to share.

We hide out of fear of getting hurt.
We choose to not get involved,
to not catch feelings,
out of fear of getting burned.

If we do step into a relationship,
we then revamp our whole world and expect our partner to do the same, by not having relationship outside of the primary relationship. Often this simply means to pull away from anyone that there may potentially be “feelings” for.
And we do this out of fear.
Fear of loss.
Fear of being abandoned.
Fear of having too much love.
We close off because our ego’s affirm to us that it is not safe to love.

NEWSFLASH!
Love will not hurt you.
Love is not limited.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.” ( 1 Corinthians 13:4-8)

So why do we fear it so?
Why do we handcuff it so?
Why do we cover it with our self-centered need?

Because we do not understand.
And we equate many a thing to be love.
We fear what we do not know.
We fear what we cannot control.
We fear that we will loose if we love,
therefore we choose to turn our backs on love,
as we embrace its doppelganger of lust and need.

Authentic loving,
is authentic relating.
Authentic intimacies,
come in many ways and are what brings joy and surrender to all relationship.

Sex is never a reason to fear loss.
Love will never create loss.

The only reasons we change seasons with a relationship is because we have either out grown the relationship or have not grown to the next level within it,
or it was based on need ( not love) and those needs are no longer being met.

Level up your love life,
by tapping into your authentic self.
Embody yourself and open to love.
This is the answer to your happily ever after.

As always,
Stop Existing & Start Living

If you are ready to make the leap then reach out to me today. I am running a Christmas special where you get 2-months of coaching for FREE. Check it out and use the SANTAGIFT code in the why you want to work with me section.

Never Stop Manifesting The Cup of Coffee

About 20+ years ago I started focusing in on the law of attraction.
I wanted to take charge of my manifesting and I wanted to create the life of my dreams.
Having always been spiritually focused,
and enjoying quantum physics for my pleasure reading,
it came to me that this thing known as the Law of Attraction might be worth investigating.
After all there was a history of exploration around it.
Anyone who has ever read Think and Grow Rich, or any of Napoleon Hill’s work as well Earl Nightingale, Dale Carnegie or Norman Vincent Peale just to name a few greats, I am sure would agree that there must be something to this law.

Through the course of time,
I have had many a positive and a negative experience with the law. The thing that I have had the toughest concept with was personal responsibility.

Yes responsibility.
We are each responsible for what is coming into our manifestation zone.
What we are attracting to us.
It is difficult to take responsibility for the crap that manifests in our lives.
I am sure that you would agree.
It is hard to look at these things and say with certainty and even enthusiasm,
“Yes! I did that. – I attracted that. – I own it.”

I mean how often do we want to own the random flat tire,
the hot water heater blowing up, the car accident, the personal injury, the job or relationship loss?

We never want to own these things.
yet this is where the power of our manifestation is seen and we MUST pay attention too.

I will even go to the level that we should be excited about the sh*t that manifests,
as it shows us that we are manifestors.
And damn good one’s at that.

Owning our power means that we do not ignore any manifesting that we have going on for ourselves.
It means that we have to be just as full of gratitude for the free random coffee that we manifested to the flat tire.

It is all us.
It all came from our thought vibration.
And this is where we learn our truth.

Are you sitting there, reading this and agreeing?
or are you disagreeing?
It does not matter BTW.
It just is.

That is the thing about universal laws.
they don’t care if we believe in them or not,
they still happen according to their design.
It is up to us to become conscious and start making use of them to our consistent benefit ( manifesting what we perceive as positive) or remain unconscious and just let the cards fall will they will.

It is up to each of us.

However, if we choose to CLAIM OUR LIVES,
if we choose to move forward toward the F-ck Yes! Life,
then we MUST become conscious of this law.
We must start to own all of our manifestations,
not just those that feel good to us.

I so often hear people say,
“So I started using the law of attraction 5 years ago.”

LOL….
This cracks my ass up.

“Started using…”
Honey, you were born using the law of attraction.
You use it every moment of your life.
You use it in your waking hours,
you use it in your sleeping hours.
You use it when you are pooping,
when you are eating,
when you are having sex,
or an argument.
When you are paying your bills,
or when you are on vacation.
There is NEVER a moment that you are not using the law of attraction.

It is about THOUGHT VIBRATION.

And if you “think” you are “thinking the right thoughts” but crap just keeps manifesting in your life,
then guess what?

YOU ARE STINKING THINKING.

It is not rocket science baby.
It is a universal law,
a law that is based on the frequency that your thoughts are sending out.
That is it.

The ONLY other component that matters to it,
is how you feel about these thoughts.

The emotions attached to these thoughts.

If you are sold hook line and sinker on the fact that you will always be living pay check to pay check,
or that you will never find love,
or you will never have the body you want,
or whatever it is that you are CERTAIN that you cannot have,
then guess what baby?
You are right.

And feel that feeling,
that sensation in your body as you think about not having it.
Feel that anxiety,
that sadness,
that disappointment,
that anger.

If you are waking with a subconscious thought that is affirming that you cannot have,
and you wake with one of these sensations,
then it should just make sense that you not manifest ANYTHING other than things that support these feelings.
So you pour hot coffee on yourself,
you break a dish,
you scratch the side of your car,
your shoes don’t feel right,
you feel bloated,
etc.
etc.

The opposite is true to though luv.

If you wake with a feeling of gratitude,
a feeling of love in your heart, ‘excitement for the day,
for life and all that you can make happen.

If you feel into how good it feels to wake up,
and KNOW that you are the CREATOR of your world,
that you are so supported.

So very supported.
The whole universe wants to give you what you want.
What you are VIBING TOO.
So all you have to do is BE HAPPY.
And more things that make you happy will manifest like magic into your world.

F-ck YES!!!!!!

This is the F-ck Yes!! Life that I coach on.
This is what I help people every day achieve.
This is the life that I wake to daily,
and if I don’t then I consciously make up my mind to change my VIBE ASAP.

Today,
today is like any other.
Today I woke,
I was tired, but I stretched and said my gratitudes before my feet hit the ground.
I moved on through my moments of motherhood,
of taking tired kids to school,
I dealt with my ex and christmas items,
I looked at some bills,
and I drove in rush hour traffic to take my daughter almost 2 hours away to state testing for homeschool.

And you know what?
I walked into the conference space that her testing was at,
fifteen minutes early,
I laughed and connected with the ladies who were setting everything up for the students and a few moments later,
one of the women said,
” Excuse me mam, would you be interested in a white mocha latte from Starbucks? It is untouched. I ordered it on accident for someone who is not here. Do you want it?”

F-ck Yes!!!!
A small manifestation.
But showing where my VIBE is.

I said yes and gave my thanks.
I opened to receiving.

I said yes.
And gave gratitude. (KEYS to receiving more)

often in the start of awaking to the law of attraction,
we are told to just go manifest a cup of coffee.

I want to say,
NEVER STOP MANIFESTING THAT CUP OF COFFEE.

Your belief of your power starts and is consistently supported here.

So what will you manifest today?

As always,
Stop Existing & Start Living

If you are ready to make the leap then reach out to me today. I am running a Christmas special where you get 2-months of coaching for FREE. Check it out and use the SANTAGIFT code in the why you want to work with me section. HERE