fuck yes life | KW Coaching

THIS is My Tagline To Life and HERE IS WHY.

“CBD lovin’, anti-vaxxing, interracial family, sexually open and confident, slutty AF some may say, freedom focused, excepting of all.”

THIS is my lifestyle tagline.

THIS is my family tagline.

THIS is my belief’s tagline.

And why would this be my tag line?

Because I believe in freedom of speach, love, sex, religion,choices in life and believe that no matter who you are, ( race, religion, polical views, sex, sexual preferences, economic standing or other) that WE ARE ALL WORTHY.

Worthy of what you may ask?

Worthy of living.

Not just existing.

Worthy of all the things stated above.

Worthy of having our own opinions.

Worthy of not being shamed or stoned by others ideas, judgements, opinions or fears.

Worthy of just being us.

Many disagree with me on many topics.

And the thing that comes through the most in the conversations and debates is a desire to shush me.

To the point that recently I was multiple times told that I was a bad citizen for my views, that I was not compassionate and did not care for others, that I was a horrible human being, that I should shut up, and that if I get sick to not waste the medical systems time but to just die at home.

All of these statements came because of a disagreement in ideas and beliefs.

Differences of views.

All of these stones thrown had the strong feeling of wanting to shame, control and silence what did not align to their beliefs and views of current.

And as I read through comments of over a hundred plus,

I found myself sitting in gratitude for these individuals’ truth shares.

I am not a person that has an issue with seeing things differently then the masses,

differently then my lover, my child or my friend.

And I know that my views on life are a far cry from average and ordinary.

And it is beautiful to me that we humans are so diverse in our desires, our feelings and beliefs.

It’s what makes us each so unique.

But typically we deeply fear what is not like us.

What is not common or what we perceive as normal.

Our fear makes us want to eradicate whatever is not perceived the same as us.

And this has been our human nature forever.

The reason I do not lay claim to a religion is because religion is a prime example of this belief structure that there is ONLY ONE WAY.

I believe that we are all truly children of God no matter our race, belief, sex or preferences.

I believe that the creator moves through us all.

And that our differences are revealing how diverse God truly is.

I believe that “made in his image” does not refer to our race, sex or other but is actaully speaking of the energy, the life and consciousness, the love that resides in all of us.

I believe that we are each here to learn from one another and that one of our biggest life lessons is to learn to love our differences.

The only way that we can ever do this though is to learn to love ourselves at a deep level first.

To strip ourselves from this concept that we are here to please others ideas, views or beliefs about us.

Self-love comes from seeing our light and darkness and making peace with them both.

Self- love comes from knowing our own value.

Self- love comes from respecting ourselves enough to not sway to the worlds ideas and perceptions, nor to just give up ourselves because we make another uncomfortable with our views and beliefs.

Self- love is mandatory if we are to ever have true unconditional love for any other human as well.

And compassion can only come when we have it for ourselves first.

Same for any positive characteristic that we value such as respect or understanding.

If we believe that we are responsible for everyone elses everything and they for our feelings, fears and hopes then all we are showing is our lack of clarity within who we are.

To have understanding,

we need to listen,

we need to inquire,

we need to learn to breathe and not be so reactive,

jumping to conclusions.

We need to realize that this person that we want to have understand us,

desires the same.

The majority of our fights in our world and in our own homes comes about because we suck at communication skills.

And the ones listed above are the highlighted ones that need attention from all of us.

The radical conversations that are traveling around the world right now are just highlighting the true poison that resides within each of our lives.

It is fear.

And it is fear of differences more than anything else.

And so we run around pointing fingers and laying blame on everyone who thinks differently or looks differently proclaiming that we love unconditionally, stating that we are wanting peace, freedom, well being for all but continuing the blame game as we spew out our hatred and lack of toleration or desire to understand our fellow human beings.

All the while believing that we love ourselves and that is why we are fighting and hating.

When we speak such poison as some of the things I have heard the last few weeks it saddens my soul at how many people truly are lost within themselves and hold so much anger and hatred.

When we can get to a point where we can agree to disagree and still love our fellow human despite the difference,

then we will be in a place where we can heal and make true change in our world as well as in our communities and home.

But this will only happen when we can learn to love ourselves deeply. To look within ourselves and love all our flaws, all our sins, all our wounds as well as our beauty.

Until then,

we will remain lost and hateful.

To freedom.

To love.

To all our beautiful differences.

Be the change, start loving unconditionally today, ‘starting with yourself.

As Always,

Stop Existing & Start Living

“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

Want to learn more about self-love practices that can transform your reality from average and ordinary to a F-ck Yes Life? Message me today.

Throne-tood! – Get Some.

Throne-tood!

It’s a THING.

And it’s a thing that you gotta get some of if you want to have the life that you claim that you want.

We have been raised to have shame over loving ourselves.

We have been raised to believe that it is wrong or even bad to think highly of ourselves,

or to brag.

And it is “selfish” ( meaning bad) to ask for what we want, need or desire.

But instead the correct path to happiness is to look like this so we have been raised to believe…

Talk like shit about yourself,

hate on your body,

on your thoughts,

in your life.

Be SUPER effing critical about everything and never admit to your glory.

Downplay everything good and hype up everything that is not perfect in your life.

Make sure that you are NEVER offending everyone else,

because YOU….

yes you are responsible for everyone else’s feelings, ideas, perceptions, thoughts and actions,

so make sure to never mess up or have an opinion that does not match whomever you are with.

Put others before yourself at all costs.

Exhaust yourself and keep giving,

but don’t bitch that you are at your breaking point.

Suck it up.

Don’t show your emotions,

any of them but “blase.”

Indifference is the best path,

even if it’s not true.

Your anger,

your sadness,

your joy,

hide because it is too effing much for the world around you.

Fear everything.

And know that you are most likely at fault for the crap no matter what,

and if it’s not you then feel offended instantly,

if anyone says different or God forbid

goes against all of these rules of how to live a happy successful life.

And just be happy with it already,

‘cus this baby is what life is all about.

This is living the dream.

This is success.

F-cking crazy as all hell is’nt it?

I mean when I write it out like that,

unless you are blind, dumb and stupid,

then you have to admit that anyone who actually thinks or feels this way is NEVER going to be thriving,

going to experience success or empowerment,

never going to feel confident.

Most likely only be used and hurt frequently,

will have a crappy backbone,

will not know themselves or anyone else for that matter,

and will simply not ever touch happiness.

So what is the answer?

Get a f-cking THRONE-TOOD!

There I said it.

It is high time that you started to value yourself.

Claiming your life, ‘calling in your blessings,

being a conscious co-creator,

manifesting a life that is full of wonder, love and success,

REQUIRES YOU TO PUT YOUR CROWN ON.

As long as you keep disrespecting God’s glory and power and not allowing his power and will to move through your life,

then you will keep falling prey to this stinking thinking love.

As long as you keep believing that God wants you to walk looking down at the ground,

tripping in misery over all that you have lost and ignoring the joy that your life could be,

then you will never feel the wonder of walking with you head held high,

your eyes meeting others in unconditional love and acceptance,

or the witnessing of the miracles that happen daily,

IN YOUR LIFE.

As long as you keep being available for scarcity,

and never picking up that crown that God has handed you,

then you will continue to suffer by your own hand.

And you will forever remain a slave to the enemy known as fear.

Oh, beautiful, don’t you see the path that you are too walk.

Can you not feel the call in your soul?

Now in our world we need more than ever before for you to RISE UP….

SPEAK UP…

LIGHT UP….

But that means that you have to accept that many who choose to remain in darkness and pain will be disgusted by your choice.

They will call you names,

they will hate on you and shame you,

they will want to tear you down in any way they can,

and they will make you doubt your path.

It will require you to have courage,

to love yourself more than you thought possible and to walk in FAITH.

And if you choose to step away from the many who still remain in fear,

if you choose to instead embrace your power,

and the love that the universe/God has for you,

then your life will be one of bliss and glory.

And THAT…

THAT is what we are each to do.

That is how we celebrate life,

honor God,

and THRIVE.

Are you ready, love?

Are you ready to finally say F-ck Yes! to yourself and your dreams and stop making excuses and sharing the thousands of reasons as to why you cannot do/be/have?

But instead just step firmly in faith on this path before you that is calling you?

Are you ready to stop giving your power just lip service but acting in faith on it?

I can tell you that many people say they are light workers,

they claim to be abundant,

they proclaim their faith,

and they say they believe in magic and miracles,

they even proudly state that they get manifesting and that they are powerful manifestors….

and they are.

For sure.

But, if you are struggling,

if you are suffering,

if you are feeling lost, tired and lonely…

Then baby, you are not really claiming your crown.

If you are not happy, (truly)

then you still have not figured it out,

and it YOU that this is written for.

It is you that need to KNOW YOUR WORTH.

It’s time to pick that crown up and have a THRONE-TOOD….

Because the life that you want for DEMANDS IT!

So Get One.

As Always,

Stop Existing & Start Living

“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

Ready to step forward and say yes to your crown love?

Ready to stop being available for suffering, pain and misfortune?

Let’s speak today about no more reasons and excuses,

and get that crown picked up and put where it rightfully goes.

Message for deet’s.

Let’s Get Real About What Define The Relationship Really Means.

“I like you pretty good, let’s see where this goes.”

Maybe I have commitment issues some would say,

and I have been told this from past lovers.

They were convinced that because I refused to be labeled,

because I refused to DTR ( define the relationship) that I was not good with commitment.

They could not just accept my looks of love and desire for what they were.

They could not accept the sweet and tender vulnerable moments shared for what they were,

They could not just go with the passion shared and the hours and days or even weeks spent enthralled with each other.

No, they wanted the MF LABEL.

And for some reason, the label is what made everything real.

Not the actual effing relationship that was presenting itself each day, each moment.

No, they could not trust that.

They needed the words spoken,

just how they wanted to hear them too mind you,

for it to actually be real.

Nothing mattered but the label.

And because I am a person who understands what labels are actually about,

I have a really tough time getting down with defining any relationship for that matter.

And here is why.

You see labels and definitions of relationships have NOTHING to do with love or commitment for that matter.

They don’t have anything to do with trust either,

and they are not offering any more security for either party as well.

What they do is allow us to compartmentalize the relationship, cause separation because now we segregate this relationship from the rest of our lives.

Labels allow us to define what the relationship “should” look and feel like. How it “should” play out and what the expectations are within the pretty little box that we have put it into allows for.

Labels are often asked for because one party or both are wanting validation for their existence and level of importance in the relationship.

This validation gives a false sense of security.

Which makes the partners feel safe and believe that NOW since the relationship has been properly defined that neither party will step out of the box that it has been filed in.

And that is what DTR is all about folks.

Validation of self through another, false security and control.

Because with this DTR what we are wanting is the safety ultimately of knowing ( well believing) that our partner is now “OUR PROPERTY” as defined by the label provided.

And of course they are down with abiding by the rules of this definition.

Funny little note, most people just assume that other people’s definitions and rules of the label are exactly what their own are and never stop to discuss these important things with the person that they are trying to do a relationship with and get a label on.

In my opinion,

(and maybe…. just maybe… I have worked with just a few couples over the last few decades) that one of the major reasons so many couples are not satisfied or in full alignment with their partner is because they miss this vitally important conversation on the front side.

The conversation around, “Why do you do relationships? And what are your needs/desires/expectations within a relationship?”

Can you imagine if we started having these inquiries between ourselves and our lovers?

And what if….

what if our lovers answered authentically.

OMFG! That would be amazing.

But often because so many have limited worth and self- esteem issues,

they find themselves needing to feel safe through the validation of their partner instead and therefore answer accordingly to get the result that they want from their partner instead of being truthful and having a truly intimate conversation around their differences.

All relationships at some point come to a place where the definition sorta just manifests organically.

But it is an energy that a couple will grow into as time and depth in the relationship is established,

not some words stated because partners feel pressure from what they have been told is important to ask for come date three or month six, or whatever the f-ck timeline you are working on.

If you are among the many people out there that feels that need the label to lean and trust more,

or to not have your jealousy anymore,

or to be able to be more vulnerable or intimate with your partner,

and believes that the label is a sign of love,

then you truly need to explore what your definition of love really is about.

And ask yourself if this label is truly what you are wanting or if you are actually requesting to set up agreements with your partner as to what your relationship rules are and are not.

Then ask yourself how this desire to label and set up these tidy little box homes for your relationship to get cramped in is actually serving the relationship or your supposed love for this other person?

What if you became extremely present with your partner and chose to focus on all their good traits each time you were together?

What if instead of fearing them doing something that might destroy the relationship, you chose to commit to look for how well they are showing up in it right now and how much beauty you are enjoying with them right now?

What if you opted to actually practice authentic unconditional love with them and just wanted to enjoy them in all their radiance because your desire for them was to be that person who can hold loving space without a need to contain their soul and own them?

What if you chose to just allow them to be them and you to be you?

What if you choose consciously to come into the relationship each new day as though it was a new relationship that you were excited and appreciative of?

What if you started to define your relationship by saying,

” I like you pretty good, let’s see where this goes.”

Can you imagine how much more depth, love, compassion, witnessing, love, trust, and joy would come through your partner and the relationship?

Or continue on your path,

you know the one.

The one that has you believing that controlling your partner and defining your relationship and owning them as property in any f-cking fashion is LOVE.

And enjoy all the trauma that creates and the broken expectations and pain.

Because that is the result when we attempt to control the human spirit and not allow others to live authentically.

Not to mention,

When we do this it is only supporting our fear and at our core we feel the out of alignment that is caused with God and our soul.

Level Up Your Love Now.

And Remember,

Stop Existing & Start Living

“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

Want to level up your relationship or learn more on authentic relating skills that can rekindle, ignite and bring average relationships into Enlightened?

Reach out to me about my Passion Coaching for Couples Program today.

June 27, 2020June 27, 2020

Looking For A Reason To Just F-cking Be You? Here is the Answer Luv.

I absolutely HATE being controlled.
I dislike having to seek approval from another to just f-cking be me.

You know what I mean?

How do you feel about that?
Needing validation from another to be/do/have the things in your life that you just want.
That you enjoy.
That makes your life yours.
That make you,
you?

But this is how we live out our lives.
We run around seeking for validation,
which is just another way of saying that we are asking for others permission to live our life,
or to be us.

And that has ALWAYS seemed a bit crazy to me.
10 year old Kendal, did not want to do this.
16 year old Kendal, certainly did not want to do this,
to the point that I found away to get homeschooled when homeschool was not a thing.
20 year old Kendal, figuring out the adulting thing did not enjoy this and quit her job because of this.
34 year old Kendal hated it so much that she left her husband for it.
And today,
well yeah… that shiz just don’t fly.

I still hate being controlled,
if you want me to do something,
control me in the opposite and I am sure to move the direction away from the control ( unless I see the manipulation and that is a totally different story),
But in truth what I dislike is not so much the control, but having to do what I don’t want to do.

I do not like having to do things that do not feel good to me for where I am at RIGHT NOW.

If it feels good and in alignment,
THEN SIGN ME THE F-CK UP!

If not then know I will change directions on you so quick your head will spin.
And I have been guilty of this all my life.
I have been called naive,
I have been told that I am flighty and flaky,
that I have commitment issues,
that I am lost.

The reality is far simpler than any of these options,
the truth is, I know, like I have always known that if I am not a F-ck Yes! to it then why do it.
And I change gears based on my authentic yes or no to something.

Sometimes that means that I cancel things.
Sometimes that means that I say I am going to get something done and then I do something else.
Sometimes it means that I have to own where I am at that I simply am no longer in alignment to whatever it was that I had agreed too.

And I get that the world does not like it when people operate on these sort of guidelines that I do.,
I understand that it goes compleletly against what we are taught.

But it works.
And for those of us out there that are self learners and thinkers,
that know beyond a doubt that our feelings and thoughts are what create our reality, that are not average and ordinary,
well guess what?

This is often what you will get.

What is often perceived as:

*IRRESPONSIBLE
*IRRATIONAL
*CHAOTIC
*NIEVE
*FLIGHTY
*FLAKY
*COMMITMENT ISSUES
*ATTITUDE
*SELFISH

Because we get that what makes us feel good,
that living according to our souls calling and being fully in alignment to that,
is ALL the F-ck that matters.

We get that being selfish is where it is at.
Because selfishness is not evil,
What is evil is living in fear and scarcity.
That is not of God.

We understand that yes it takes courage to live like this, because the world has not been raised to handle our kind,
the world focused on the sheeple mentality,
the mentality of keeping you in fear and scarcity.
On the concept that you are to put EVERYONE before you and that some effing way THIS will bring you joy, happiness and all your heart desires,
But don’t you ask for anything because that’s wrong.
Think of others ALWAYS first.

Drain yourself.
Take from self until you have nothing more to give.
Until your vessel is so empty you are lost.

This is what you are here for.

And that is all wrong I tell you.

God does not want you living in fear and scarcity.
God wants you to be wanting.
It is in your wanting that the universe expands and evolves,
it is through you that we all grow.

And if you fall prey to the concept that living your life based on the permission of someone else is what you are to do,
that validating yourself through the ideas, beliefs and desires of another is what you are here for,
to be servant to them and cast yourself aside,
then well baby you are simply wrong.

You can never fill another’s glass from your empty pitcher.

This means you MUST approach life from a more selfish manner and learn how to take care of you.

You say that you want to manifest all this abundance,
the love and connection,
the freedom and opportunities,
you say that you want to be able to make a massive impact on the world,
to touch lives,
to help others heal,
or to lead the people in your life to a happy way of being.

Well then you gotta quit on this concept of living from the permission of others.

You will NEVER know your own worthiness or value if you rely on somelese to tell it to you.

If you are looking for the pat on the head from another to tell you that you are on the right path or doing good,
needing that validation,
then you will forever fall for whatever someone else deems acceptable for your life.

Sad but true.

Cuz’ you see baby,
it’s all up to you loving you enough to stop the crazy concept that you need validated and permission for being you.

You were born worthy luv.
You were.
But you gotta accept that.
And it starts with you knowing that by doing all the damn things that you keep doing that you hate,
that makes you feel like shit about yourself,
that makes you fear,
that causes you separation from your truth,
is the culprit to the suffering and void that you feel.

You must start living according to you.
For you.

And no one else.

You see when you feel those negative emotions,
you know,
shame
guilt
anger
jealousy
bitterness
fear
loss
confusion
prejudice
blame
suffering

those emotions are ONLY there to tell you one MF thing.

YOU ARE NOT IN YOUR TRUTH.
YOU ARE NOT LIVING ACCORDING TO YOUR SOUL.
YOU ARE OUT OF ALIGNMENT WITH GOD.

These are not you and they are not for you,
that is why you are feeling like shit baby.

But you have to start interpreting these emotions correctly in order to navigate yourself the right direction.

You must realize that you are here to want and desire.
You are here to love.
You are here to experience.
You are here to connect.
You are here to share.
You are here to BE YOU.

And if you can get this point, ‘then you join the 0.01% of the world that gets it.

You join those of us who are THRIVING and LIVING as intended.

And if you continue to choose otherwise,
but expect different results,
well let’s just say that, that might be kind of silly, right?

Because as long as you keep doing your stinking thinking and needing someone else to validate your existence for you then you will remain unhappy and lost and most likely not very successful in many subject areas of your life.

And I don’t want that for you.
I believe you are worthy.
That we all are worthy.

And that God wants you to THRIVE.

But you have to believe it too.
And want it.
And have the COURAGE to claim it.

SAY AMEN OR YES IN THE COMMENTS IF YOU WANT TO CLAIM THAT LIFE OF YES FOR YOU NOW.

And As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

Let’s get you saying yes to you once and for all .
You can have it.
You can.
Message me for deet’s on my coaching opportunities available worldwide now.

Watch: HUSTLE ENERGY! This is where the MAGIC is.

To The Man Who’s Sleeping With My Wife.

Adobe Stock Photo.

Dear Brother –

I am in joy. I am also scared.

First, thank you.

Thank you for showing up in her life in the way that you have. You’ll be exchanging eye gazes, sweet energy, laughter, meals, and touch with her. I know this will bring her joy. And her joy is my joy. I know it’s hard to believe, but the freedom for her to explore with you is evidence of my unconditional love for her.

To me, true love means wishing for my beloved to be fulfilled in every possible way, even if that fulfillment comes with some emotional work for me.

You see, we men have existed in a double standard narrative for thousands of years. Men have been mostly respected (or at least tolerated) for having more than one lover. Women have been slut-shamed, punished, and even murdered in some countries for loving more than one.

There is a revolution of this narrative taking place and we can join this wave of change together.

Brother, you are something I can never be. You are other. You are her novelty, her adventure. You are not me. When she shares her life story with you (the story I know oh so well) she will have the chance to be mirrored back with a new

curiosity.

And that feels amazing for me to know.

To try to take this experience away from her would be to exercise a conditional love, a selfish love. If exploring new love can bring her immense joy, then who am I to interfere? Conventional love is conditional love. It says… “I love you, except for this one condition: I will not share you for as long as you are with me.”

So I choose unconventional love, which says… “I love you unconditionally, therefore, your joy is my joy, even if that joy does not come from me.”

If you are reading this, then you likely have shown up in my life as a true brother, open-hearted and caring. She wouldn’t have it any other way. You honor the roots she and I have intertwined and the commitments we have made

to each other. Like us, you’ve done the work to transcend most of your conditioned insecurities.

You’ve aligned yourself with the idea that our core human needs (certainty, love, significance, variety, growth and service) are served by the ideal that we all have the capacity to love more than one, if we do so in a conscious way.

She is a divine feminine goddess. She is beautiful inside and out. She lights up any room she walks into. Her heart is enormous. She is committed to her own personal growth and to leaving this world better than she found it.

She is a woman that I am sworn to protect, yet one that I do not possess.

Despite my patriarchal conditioning, keeping all of her goodness to myself would be a sin. I have chosen the path less traveled in that I honor her freedom to radiate out love and take in love, to be seen for all the good that she is, by other than just me. This freedom means more mirrors to mirror back, which leads to more growth, more healing, and more service for her to experience. All of this makes me happy to imagine.

Still, I am scared.

The little boy in me is scared of being abandoned. The high school kid who was dumped by his girlfriend for the star soccer player right before Prom. And the man who lost two big loves to other men on this road less traveled. This is my wounding.

I am keenly aware that there are many wounded men out there who have not been able to show up for women in the ways they need to flourish. I am afraid that someone new may upset all the healing work we’ve done together, or worse, re-wound her. While I don’t know you well (yet) and only time will tell, I trust that everything will unfold the way it’s meant to unfold. I also trust in her judgment.

I persist with this love-style because it remains my deepest truth. I push forward with the faith that there are others out there (hopefully you) who share in our freedom to love more than one for life. Others who no longer wish to exist in a competitive landscape of disposable relationships or a “zero-sum game” where one’s gain is often another’s loss.

Brother, we are not adversaries, nor are we competing for the heart of this woman. You know this. Her heart belongs to no one but her. This goddess, with her free will, gets to choose how to share her space and her time. If you are ever confused, scared, or not fully expressed, please know that you’re in good company. It will always be my intention to uphold a safe container that is full of heart-centered, open, peaceful communication for everyone involved.

So I thank you for the joy. I thank you for coming into her (and my) world, and I ask that we see each other, love each other, and build our brotherhood from our common ground… this beautiful soul. While nothing is expected from you, I do wish to know you, learn from you, and share with you. I look forward to playing together, creating together and exploring all possibilities in friendship.

AND thank you for scaring me.

Thank you for allowing me to do the work I still need to do. I am human and am still shedding the discomforts that we’ve all been conditioned to carry for many generations. It is my mission to release these discomforts and I am grateful to have you (and her) on this journey with me. Thank you in advance for being patient and for being gentle with me.

Treat her well, brother. She is worthy of and will expect nothing but excellent care, high-quality love, and mindful communication. One benefit of our love-style is that no one gets to settle for mediocrity or complacency. We all are motivated to grow each day and show up as the best versions of ourselves.

Lastly, please remember this: your joy is also my joy. Genuinely.

Love,

Your Brother,

* This essay is a companion to my love’s Letter To The Woman Whose Man I’m Sleeping With. Both letters were inspired by the exquisitely vulnerable essay “A Letter To The Women Who Sleep With My Man” by Wilrieke Sophia. Visit https://freelovediaries.com/all-entries/ for more.

Here to serve,

xoxo

Shai Fishman from LEVELED UP LOVE

June 16, 2020June 16, 2020

There Are Only Two Kinds Of People… Which Are You?

WTF Did you do over the weekend?

Did you live?

Did you THRIVE?

Each day we gain a new opportunity to do just these things.

And each day so many people choose to just get by.

To survive the day.

Does that sound fun to you?

“I am going to survive this day.”

What have you got going on?

“Nothin’ much.”

So you see luv,

if you desire to live that F-ck Yes Life,

then you have to flip the switch to living it….

cuz surviving your life is never going to happen,

and no moment is ever promised to us.

If you don’t choose to flip that switch to living the life of your dreams,

regardless of what your friends and family say or think,

no matter what is happening in our governments, economy, or what debates are up,

then you will simply NEVER,

let me repeat that for you….

NEVER have the life that you claim that you desire.

Matter of fact you may even find yourself among the many who sit back and dissect and analyze all those who are out there living.

You may discover yourself so far out of alignment with your truth and your worthiness that you get caught up being a judgy, critical and even upset about others lives, person.

About what they choose to do or not to do.

You may discover that you are caught in the drama and chaos of the world that is always around us,

falling prey to its life stealing ways,

believing that, that is what you are to focus on.

Never realizing that it’s sabotaging you from the gift that you were given from God….

YOUR LIFE TO LIVE.

And living is not about just getting through the day and paying your bills,

about appearing to do what is expected,

or about people pleasing to the degree that you have nothing left to give to yourself.

Living is not about you doing anything that someone else deems appropriate or right for you.

Did you get that luv?

Living IS NOT about you doing what someone else “thinks or believes” is right for you.

They are not living your life.

And if you believe that you are here to please and be liked by everyone else,

then you’re simply being silly.

This way of “wantabe living” will only land you in a depression, exhaustion, emptiness, lost, and feeling unworthy, unloved, and broken.

It may feel good to help others,

and don’t get me wrong,

It’s a damn good thing to be compassionate and helpful.

But, if you are being helpful to the point that you have lost your boundaries and value,

then you are not helping anymore.

You cannot help those around you when you yourself are empty.

And the way that you fill yourself is by LIVING.

Is by THRIVING.

The more you do this,

the more you have to give.

The more you can be compassionate and in love with all.

I am a firm believer that the reason there is so much anger, hatred and jealousy in our world,

is because we have been raised to believe that loving ourselves, giving to ourselves, taking care of self first makes us a bad person. However, we crave just that at our core.

And so we hate ourselves.

ANd when we feel this shitty about ourselves we have no space for love for someone else.

We have no tolerance for our differences,

no ability to agree that we can disagree and still remain friends or lovers.

You see it is impossible to see clearly the world around us, when we are not thriving.

Any point outside of thriving, (which BTW is exactly what your life was intended to be about, it’s your set point if you allow it),

Any point other than thriving is you viewing the world from your pain body. From your trauma, your fear, your ego, your need to control, because you cannot fathom letting go of the suffering.

Thriving is a foregin concept to the majority of the world.

To the point that we finger point, try and shame, hate on and dissect those that are doing it. It scares our ego’s.

Because thriving means that you fully accept yourself, love yourself and KNOW WHO YOU ARE. You also, get that you cannot control others, nor should you desire too, that’s not loving….

That you cannot give to the point of exhaustion and crossing your own boundaries.

You understand that the best you,

is the you that loves you.

And that you are not going to be a wonderful person to the majority, simply because you are not doing what they want you to do.

THRIVING my love is about you expanding horizons,

getting to know yourself and falling in love with that amazing soul who looks back at you in the mirror,

NO EFFING matters what anyone else says or thinks about you on this planet.

THRIVING is about you surrendering to your heart,

and enjoying your life to the fullest.

THRIVING is about you accessing your DESIRE and knowing that you can have it,

that what you desire, desires you as well.

THRIVING is about being in alignment to God/Universe.

There are only two kinds of people on this planet….

Those that are in alignment.

and….

Those that are not in alignment.

We are all both of these at times, the true question comes down to where to reside most of your life?

If you have no clue….

look at your world.

Let yourself get real with how you perceive this world,

your life,

how you truly feel about it.

Are you in love with your life?

or something other than?

It’s time to JUMP INTO THRIVING.

You are so worthy.

You are so ready.

Make the leap now and claim it for yourself.

The magic is all you baby.

——————————————————————————-

***Side note: This picture was taken yesterday during my first jump, such a thrilling experience that I aim to repeat in the near future 🙂 but the weekend was loaded with adventure, from doing a ghost hunt in an 1845 jail, to exploring deep connection with my lover, staying in VRBO chicken coop, just because it sounded interesting, showering outside under the starry sky and more…No matter your life situation love, you can live an adventure, I know because I have done so. I have had to raise five children on $17k a year, I have been homeless and camped for months pretending that we were just having a summer adventure when in truth I could not afford a roof over our head or food, I have stood over the ER bed of my child who was in a sever accident and wondered if there were a God, I have been diagnosed with painful illnesses, been through miscarriages, years of depression, divorce, rape, physical violence that broke my body, and more…. and you know what? My spirit said, “LETS THRIVE! You are worthy.”

And today, my life is totally different. So different that people dislike and judge me for THRIVING and sharing it.

So much so different, that I think about something and it easily manifests in days. My life is now magical because I get that thriving is who I AM.

And you are too.

———————————————————————————-

As Always,

Stop Existing & Start Living

“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

Ready to leap into a life that you love?

Lets connect and get you expanding and saying F-ck Yes! to your thriving life now.

It’s time you stop just getting by.

You are worth so much.

Message me for deet’s.

The Power of Facebook Memories….What it means to your F-ck Yes! Life.

You gotta love Facebook memories.

Don’t you?

I mean they make us laugh,

Make us smile,

Make us feel our hearts tug,

Bring up sadness,

Missing,

And appreciation.

Facebook memories….

This last weekend I have been off camping in a tipi out in Hawkins Texas. Its been a lovely experience with my youngest two children and boyfriend.

The pictures that are capturing all these fantastic and fun memories are something to be grateful for.

And if you are a scrapbooker like myself,

(Well in truth I have not scrapbooked for a decade, but I take pictures with the concept and image of one day getting them scrapbooked)

Then you can for sure appreciate the memories being stored for later creative projects.

And then there are those darn Facebook memories…

One year ago today….you were at this Jimmy Buffet Concert.

Four years ago today…. you were strolling down the beach in Jamaica with your ex.

And you were hiking Dunns Falls and eating lunch at Margaritavil.

Seven years ago today…. you were enjoying a romantic dinner and sexy time with another ex that you thought the relationship would last a lifetime with for how in love you were.

Eleven years ago…. your children were calling you a hippie mama and you were proud of the title.

Lol… just some memories from my life on today.

But you know what I noticed?

As I looked through all the pictures….

The authentic smiles and connection.

The joy and laughter.

The love.

Although fleeting,

And ever changing,

It was there and it is here today as well.

And for this I am grateful 🙏.

The people in our storyline tend to change,

As humans can be quiet fickle and our egos and hearts tend to whisk us all about.

But when you choose to focus on what matters most,

The love and connection.

The beautiful memories and moments shared,

Then the players in our stories are always perfect.

They are there for a reason in that season of our lives.

And when we can embrace that truth,

It makes our lives so much more fluid and enjoyable.

As I looked back on the memories of today over the last decade,

I felt a host of emotions.

I felt my heart expand and sink.

I looked into the eyes of these now strangers,

And asked silently,

What happened here?

I also saw clearly that it was not all bad,

It was not all fake,

It was not time, energy, love, LIFE wasted.

Not at all.

It was time shared in love.

And this is my message to you today,

See the beauty of your past and the players in it.

See the love and the life we’ll spent.

Because when you do this…

You capture more of this.

You allow more good times.

You make yourself more available to living in love.

To receiving joy, connection and love.

And doesn’t that sound better then looking at those years gone by from a feeling of bitterness, anger and loss?

I mean think about what you desire.

Look at what you want for.

Are you living in the energy of it now?

Can you feel it present in your past?

Do you know how to manifest it into your tomorrow?

By seeing and feeling it ALIVE in you now.

And looking for the evidence of it in your memories and in the makings of today.

Be in gratitude for your memories.

For your storylines and for those who danced the dance with you.

It is perfect just the way it is.

As are you.

As always,

Stop Existing & Start Living

“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers ”

Message me for deets on how to get the most out of your forever and live a F-ck Yes Life now.

The Land Of Nobody…

Good Morning Beautiful!

How did you sleep?

Were your slumbers restful and pleasant or did they have you tossing in your bed?

Did you wake refreshed, vibrant and charged for this day or are you among the many of the walking dead,

those who cannot bear the idea of waking because it’s just another groundhog day?

Day in and day out,

the same events,

the same stories,

the same people.

Waking with a feeling of “why?”

And does any of it,

Especially me, even matter?

Looking about your life and questioning if anyone truly cares.

Or are they only there for what you have to offer,

at their convenience.

Yes, you know that feeling.

That feeling of,

“Nobody sees me. Nobody loves me. Nobody cares.”

This beautiful is the Land of Nobody.

And it is not a pretty place to reside.

It is not a place that you can manifest your dreams from,

it will never call into your life your ideal lover,

the money that you crave for,

the health or success.

It will never bear the fruit of happiness.

Because you see beautiful,

the Land of Nobody,

is a fictitious land that you have created your misery from.

It is a land that you have bought into,

because it is what you feel comfortable in.

Oh yes,

I just said that beautiful.

The Land of Nobody is one that brings you comfort.

That is a hard pill to swallow I know.

But it is so true.

Just as true as it is that this land will not bring you what you claim you want for,

and most certainly will not bring you what your soul is calling you toward,

and you see THAT is exactly why you are feeling so lost in yourself,

so alone,

so unloved,

so fearful,

so unseen,

unheard,

uncared for or valued.

And it is from this place of “UN” that you keep calling in the evidence to support your comfort in suffering.

You feel all the “UN” because IT IS NOT TRUE.

Your soul KNOWS differently.

Your soul see’s who you really are and what your life has to offer,

but you are withholding yourself from all your glory by focusing in on the finding of the evidence,

the proving to yourself and anyone who will listen,

that you are in the Land of Nobody wants me.

And the sad truth beautiful is that as long as you sit here,

focused on the “UN” and the nobody with such passion,

you will NEVER be able to “fix” the problem of what you are manifesting.

You will never feel loved.

You will never feel valued.

You will never feel wanted.

From this space.

And you will certainly not attract anyone into your world that will “MAKE YOU” feel that way.

Because you have created and keep creating a great momentum around not having it show up for you,

that even when the universe/God sends things into your life,

to show you how abundant and loved you really are,

you reject them by looking the other way,

or pushing your will onto life in an attempt to control it and “make it” happen,

thus supporting your need to show that you can’t have it without a fight.

Your belief is that life is hard.

That you must suffer.

That you have to work hard to get things that you want.

Your belief is that life is out to get you in some fashion and does not have your back.

But that belief is just a thought that you keep active by focusing on finding evidence for it.

You “think” it is such and therefore it is.

But you have to change the thoughts in your head,

and the way you are feeling about your life.

You have the WAKE THE F-CK UP.

And start witnessing what could be by putting your focus on that and then not trying to force it into existence.

God/Universe does not like being controlled like that,

Does not like having its hands tied,

and if you keep tieing them then you will keep getting what you have been,

because what you want for gets offered day in and day out,

opportunities to have it knock at your door,

but you keep your door locked up tight not allowing the Universe/God to reveal to you your value, your worthiness.

So if you won’t let the energy that has created universes to show you a brilliant life worth living and enjoying,

and all your dreams manifesting,

then how the f-ck do you ever expect the people in your life to show it to you?

YOU BEAUTIFUL have to open up to it.

You are the only one who can access any of it.

Putting your needs and desires onto others and then getting mad that they won;t do what you want,

when you want,

how you want,

is a self-centered, spoiled, egotistical action.

And will only keep providing you with not having.

So if you are among the millions who woke up today,

focused on not having what you want in life,

feeling like you are unloved,

unappreciated,

“UN” somethinged….

Then this message is directed at you.

Because I fully understand that feeling of “UN”

that feeling of walking around the Land of Nobody,

and I can tell you that no solution or joy ever came from this place.

And we each may venture into this land every now and then,

but it is up to us,

and ONLY US,

venture right back out.

So take back your power beautiful,

stop handing it over to the ebbs of your life,

stop looking to not be supported,

and instead KNOW that you are with certainty.

Know that you are loved,

because you love yourself enough to wake the f-ck up and feel it for yourself,

you love yourself enough to stop disrespecting your life,

and instead to open up to it and receive its glory.

You are worthy beautiful.

You are loved.

You are appreciated and valued.

Venture In Certainty for what you want not what you fear.

And As Always,

Stop Existing & Start Living

“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

Let’s do this!

You and me,

this summer.

Break free from your shiz once and for all and fall in love with the dynamic, powerhouse that YOU are.

No one is like you.

And you have a life worth sharing,

worth enjoying.

You have one life love.

One.

Let’s make it a F-ck Yes! One NOW.

Message me for deet’s on how to do this.

The Seemingly Meaningless Things.

Today I stayed in my nighty till 1pm.

Why? Because that’s what felt good for this moment.

Seems like a who the eff cares sorta thing, right?

Cuz’ it does not ultimately effect anything.
But that’s not true.

It effects everything.
Because its all about my vibe.
About how I am feeling right now.

The other day I was out at my community pool…
(And f-ck yes! We are happy our community is opening back up.)
And the water 💧 was so freaking cold.
My youngest two kids were yelping for me to get in the water and play and I was really not wanting too.
Willing yes.
But wanting…. not so much 😕.
I did want them to be happy.
I wanted to enjoy a fun moment with them.
But as I ventured into the cold depths of the pool I felt my body tense. My limbs tightened,
My heart ❤ starting beating faster and I found myself holding my breath.

I was now constricting my energy.
I was withholding my truth.
I was locking myself up.
And I felt frustrated that I was in this coldness.
My ego instantly started to play its games with me…

“You need to smile and bear this, don’t let them see your pain, frustration, or lack of wanting to be here.”

“You have to do this.”
“F-ck! This is too cold. Wish they did not want to do this.”

And my emotion to these statements?

Bitterness.
Frustration.
Shut down.

And as I got splashed, and jumped on,
I grew sad because my body was hurting.
And I was feeling trapped.
I was feeling like I had no choice or that if I stated my truth that I would upset my loved ones.

Which was NOT the emotion that I started this afternoon with.
It was however the emotion I was choosing for this moment,
By the actions I was allowing myself to take that I was not a 💯 percent too.
And so….
I also, in this action 🎬 allowed my vibe 😎 to totally be changed.

And if left unacknowledged,
And consistent action to follow where I chose to what perhaps I was willing to do,
But not willing,
Then my mood would stay low vibe.
My emotions would be darker, full of blame,
Irritation, and…
My energy…
It would remain constricted like my body was feeling from the 🥶 cold.
I would remain tense to life.
Tense to my desires.
Tense to those I am around and love.
Tense to my truth.

And then you know what 😳 happens?

I end up magnitizing and manifesting more things into my life that cause me to remain constricted.

More things that I may be WILLING to do…
But am not WANTING to do.

And so instead of living this life the way I enjoy 😉 the most,
Which is in ease and flow,
With tons of laughter, play, connection, joy, love, abundance of good shit…

I would shut it all out.
Granted my little tale to you today is only that…
A tale.
It was a flicker of thought and emotion that went through my being and announced the path that I was potentially stepping on.
But I recognized it.
I saw what those seemingly meaningless thoughts and emotions were saying.

And so I got my booty out of the 🥶 cold.
I went and did what felt good.
Laying in the 🌞 sun.

And my week has been gentle with me.
Full of what I enjoy.

It could have been different.
And often people come to me with a desire to live their f-ck yes life, and they want to know HOW 🤔.

It always comes down to these seemingly meaningless moments.

These thoughts and emotions that are left uncensored,
And how they will lead us astray.

So if my tale speaks to you today.
Here is your HOW.
Here is what you MUST start to realize.
And what is most important.

Do what you enjoy.
Don’t be led astray by what you “think” you need to do to appear a certain way to anyone else,
Or to make someone else happy,
Especially if you are a F-CK NO!

Time to get really baby.
Time to know your truth.
Its with you always,
You just have to listen and act from there.

As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers ”

Let’s do this thing luv.
You and me.
Stepping into who you really are and claiming your F-ck Yes!Life now.

Message me for deets.

Speak Up Your Life.

Speak Your Vibe Up!

Speak it,

yell it,

talk about it.

You speak things into existence.

So be effing conscious of what you are manifesting.

The last few days I have been working with a bunch of people,

beautiful souls each and every one of them,

intelligent, courageous, strong, passionate, spiritual, loving people.

This is my tribe.

These are my clients.

And I am so proud of where each of them are and how they keep witnessing themselves and loving themselves into greatness.

However, the last few weeks there is a running theme.

And the theme is shitty talking,

I mean trash talk. Not smut talk, not crazy sexual talk,

but sheer trash thoughts that don’t make them feel good about life or self.

I see them getting caught up in loops of pain and suffering,

using terms such as,

“I can’t.”

“I tried.”

“I am stuck.”

And so many others.

These words are speaking them down.

Down in vibration.

Down in thought.

Down in emotion.

Down in movement and growth,

healing.

My response typically lands me a middle finger response or a “F – You!” as they don’t enjoy being told to STOP IT.

It’s not that easy to just STOP IT.

Beacuse these words are so natural and they are clarity based on relaity. There is passion around these words of “I can’t and I tried.”

It is a natural statement and feels so authentic.

But I want to bring you into a different reality,

the reality that if you are going through something similar as my client shere and feel like you are struggling, that you have been working your butt off but barely making it, that you have tried and tried and tried, but life just keeps showing you pain and struggle,

that you can change it.

You can speak up your vibration.

You can focus your words into creating a different reality for you to observe.

So instead of saying “I can’t”

Try saying “OMG! this _______________ is so amazing. It is the most magnificent thing.”

Skip the I can and go straight to the creation of what you are wanting.

For instance….

Say you are making $50,000 a year but you want to make more. You are putting in the time and effort but you are not seeing any change in income yet,

instead of saying,

” I am trying to figure out a way to make extra money to offset things but nothing seems to be popping for me.”

Say…(to yourself outloud in the mirror)

“I am so excited, I just made an extra $500 this week!”

“I am earning $75,000) this year, it’s magnificent.”

When we use words such as magnificent, fantastic, wonderful, beautiful, incredible they carry with them a higher vibration. We instantly change our energy.

But what is more important to realize here is that our words,

all of them CREATE.

They are the nails, the boards and the glue of our lives manifestations. From our words we build what our life experience is. And this is why so many people are struggling with their health, wealth and relationships.

Just yesterday I was speaking with a beautiful young woman that I am currently working with and I shared with her that when I turned 30 years old everyone around me told me how it was all downhill from here. That I was going to feel the age, I was going to gain weight and could not lose it, that I would start to get sick more and end up on medications and that I was now old.

I laughed about that and said, “That’s not my reality. My 30’s are going to be magnificent. Playful, healthy and strong.” I told myself how beautiful I was and how great I felt.

And guess what, it was so.

When I turned 40 I heard all the same shiz.

Except people told me that I was lucky that it did not happen in my 30’s, but now….

now it was for sure going to happen.

I was on the back side of my life.

And here I am at 44, mother to seven, and I feel great.

I get told all the time I don’t look my age,

I have vitality.

I take no medications.

And I still speak up my vibration to,

“That’s not my reality.”

I keep speaking my reality to what I want and I speak it daily in my thoughts,

to myself in the mirror,

I allow myself to act youthful,

I play,

I enjoy adventures,

I enjoy life.

And so it is that my life experience corresponds to what I am speaking into existence.

So many folks do the opposite though and they grow old and sickly just because they believe that when they hit a certain number of age that that’s the way it is supposed to be and they speak their lives down.

This is true with any subject area of our lives.

We can speak it up or we can speak it down.

So if you are one of the naysayers to your life and you are speaking about how you can’t, or how you are struggling,

how life is hard, how much pain you are in, how much crap keeps happening to you,

then all I can say is….

STOP IT!

Stop creating your misery.

Life is not doing anything to you that you are not asking for.

That you are not speaking into your experience.

And the more you play those negative records on replay,

the more you emotionalize the fear and pain, the struggle and drama,

and believe that its normal,

that its just the way it is because of your age, your income status, your sex, your country or religion,

the more you create with certainty.

It does not have to be that way though.

You can SPEAK UP YOUR VIBRATION,

thus the things that attract into your life expereince.

But you have to be willing to take responsibility for what you are saying to self and to everyone you come into conversation with.

You must watch your words.

They have power.

As Always,

Stop Existing & Start Living

“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

Want to learn how to Speak Up Your Vibe to Manifest the Life that You Really want to be living?

Message me on deet’s for my 1:1 coaching opportunities now.