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Accessing the Light Of Your Desire.

I woke with a hunger.
My sex was on fire and I knew what I needed.
I rolled over, spread my legs and moaned a sigh of desire.
Here my turn on was,
igniting me in this moment,
making me yearn for something deeper.
Yes deeper in my sex,
but deeper in my life as well.
A feeling of fear moved through my body and I could feel myself leaning toward contraction of all this yumminess.
As I pondered the sensations,
the hunger,
the cravings and creatve juices of what was birthing from this ignition,
I also feared loosing all that I had created.
Could I survive my turn on?
Could my relationships survive my turn on?
Could the life that I had created thus far survive,
and if so how would all be transformed?
 
This is the agony of turn on.
We touch on it at moments in our life and as we feel its heat upon our flesh and in our hearts,
we fear its power.
Our power.
And question if we can survive accessing a deeper level of who we truly are.
The majority of people choose safety and mediocrety.
They step back from the flames of their SOUL ignited and they choose to ignore it.
To just maybe crack the door to their soul but a hair, so they can see its radiant light flickering through the crack,
but not enough to actual feel its essence in their lives.
 
This is the SOUL.
The soul is that of fire and freedom.
It longs to have ignition.
The oxygen of the soul is the revival of turn on and when we allow ourselves a moment to breathe into our truth,
when we ask why we are settling for so much less sthan what we know is possible,
we wake up the coals of this desire.
Each inquiry of our hearts,
each questioning of our happiness,
each moment we look a little deeper is a stoking of the fire that is hungry to be seen again.
To breathe into life.
 
The only question remains,
“Will you open to your hungers or will you hide once more form them?”
 
The hiding comes through the fear of loss,
the fear of being left alone in your fire,
and being forced to sacrifice all that you have come to love and have.
 
The truth is,
all that you love and have come to have is not stagnet energy.
It moves with time and space and in our effort to try and keep it just as it is,
we squash its life and potential as well as our own.
If what we love and have is meant to be and in alignment to our SOUL,
our heart and truth,
then it will transform with us,
embracing our desires and needs and all that we are revealing,
and if it is not of soul alignment then it must move into a new dimension of relationship with us and that may feel like its ending.
 
Is there ANYTHING in this life that is truly worthy of you stepping away from your power and truth?
 
And if you say yes to this question,
then if it is truly worthy of your sacrifice of YOU,
then would it demand this of you?
And if so , is that love?
 
When we love,
truly love,
we want for the best of another.
When we love,
truly love ourselves,
we understand that we must stand in our power and want for the best for ourselves.
We must not hide our flames of desire,
we must not squelch our turn on.
Because it is this turned on desire for life,
for joy,
for love,
for sex,
for play, connection, revealing, and truth.
That is the ignition of our empowerment.
 
A candle cannot burn when in a closed container.
Yet you may believe that yours can.
Are you living life with this idea?
Are you living in fear of you rturn on and squelching your pleasure, your truth, your power?
 
Or ar eyou asking another to live in this state with the concept that if they loved you,
if they understood your fears and pain that they would just live in a constainer?
The container that you deem safe.
 
This is a year of change.
It is a year of EMPOWERMENT my love,
and you may claim that you want fo rit,
that you want for love and freedom,
but I question if you can truly handle it.
I ask you today to sit with your fear.
To ask yourself if your fear is worth you not living truely YOU.
 
 
And As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
 
Are you ready for a Year Of YOU?
Availble to a limited VIP group of powerful manifestors and individuals who want to rock out and Kick A*s in 2020 I am doing a private 1:1 opportunity to change your inner world to one of high vibration, focused intention, release of fear and self- sabotaging patterns, and development of abundance skills for life, love and money.
Message me for full deet’s on this VIP 6 -week opportunity to work 1:1 with me and make 2020 a Year of Me!
Start of 2020 and activiating your Yes year to You by saying YES to this potent opportunity today.
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Is there “Life” in Your Years? Or Are You Just Shifting Paperwork?

Keeping it all together can be effing difficult,
can it not?
 
2020 has started with a BIG BANG,
and not the kind that equates to eye’s rolling in the back of your head as you gasp for air and claw at sheets while calling out OMG! in a state of orgasm or ecstasy.
 
The last ten days had been a roller coaster ride of emotions, events, must do’s, drama, hustle and a packed schedule plus a 23 hour road trip home from Tahoe to Dallas.
 
But I would not change it for the world.
And from the looks of my calander I would say that things are not going to chill out any time in the near future either.
 
Now I am a person who thrives in hustle and bustle.
I also thrive in calm and peace, with limited movement.
And I have learned that in order for me to be living at my maximum potential that I do best with a 70/30 split on these two.
 
Life has not always been like this though,
a little over a decade ago, maybe 13 or 14 years back,
(and thank you Facebook for your memories that you share)
I had more of the nothing happening then the hustle and bustle of todays busy schedule and family. What I also had more of was toxic thinking,
limited acting on goals and desires,
a feeling of lostness and emptiness,
a not knowing of self,
and limited “happy” moments.
 
Today, as I have been up since 5-AM and going strong,
I have been pondering this 70/30 balance of my current life and what it has to offer my desired dreams and lifestyle. What would I change? What do I crave more or less of?
Where am I not showing up the way that I want? Where am I allowing myself to be limited?
 
I was reminded by a quote I posted 9 years ago by Abraham Lincoln, ” And in the end, it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years.”
 
About the importance of remembering to LIVE.
 
It’s not even about the hustle and bustle as I call it,
because we can get caught up in this hustle and bustle and busy work and “think” that it is living when in fact we are just shifting papers on the desk of life and getting no where in a hurry.
 
Living is not about business.
Living is about breathing in the moments.
Feeling fulfilled, connected, happy, sad, orgasmic, empty, creative, adventurous.
 
Living is about FEELING life move through you.
And when we are just shifting papers on our desk of life,
we are not living.
Sure we may have a clean home and our bills paid.
We may have three masters degrees and all the fancy electronic devices known to man.
But can you say you feel fullfilled?
 
Most people cannot.
Most people feel lost and without life purpose.
Searching for the elusive thing called happiness.
And this is because they are not focusing on putting life into their years.
They are filling years with busy work.
 
So what can you do to not expereince this empty hustle and bustle but instead put life into your years?
 
You can start with these basic focal points:
🔥Get Clarity Into Who You Want To Be In Life-
Who do I want to become as a person, and what do I really want right now in my personal and professional life?
What areas of my lacking in and why?
Where do I feel certainty at in my life right now?
🔥Get Real About Your Energy Levels-
Do I have the physical stamina and vibrancy to accomplish my goals and feel energized about life every day?
What are major factors contributing to the way I feel?
🔥Check In On Your Personal Courage –
Where am I stepping up and leaning in on my edge right now in life? Wheree am I backing down?
🔥Get Real About What Your Productivity Really Is-
Where am I getting sucked into distraction?
Where am I holding my focus and crushing it with my dreams, desires and goals?
How can I get better?
🔥What Does Your Impact/Influence Say About Your Life-
Do I have the level of influence/respect/intimacy that I need and want to accomplish my goals and dreams with my family, lover, friends, business co-workers/partners or anyone that I need for support to make my dreams/goals happen?
What areas of my life am I lacking influence/impact/respect/intimacy in that I need to accomplish my desired life?
 
I don’t know about you,
but I want to CRUSH 2020.
I want to totally 💃💃💃 ROCK OUT the year!!!
 
And in order to do that I know that my CERTAINTY and CLARITY in myself and my desired outcome needs to be formulated.
 
That means that in reality,
there is no effing time for the busy work of shifting papers on my life desk.
There is ONLY time to focus on LIVING, EXPANDING and ENJOYING.
 
And the successful one’s know this.
We get it.
You may wonder how we do it?
How do we balance and harmonize family, business, spiritual, health, travel, romance and all the other little shiz,
it’s simple….
 
We focus on putting life into our years instead of getting caught up on the dust in the corners of the desk.
 
We focus on being present, active and taking NO EXCUSES.
Especially from ourselves.
 
We know what we want.
And we don’t just give it lip service.
We step the F-ck IN on our desires and MAKE THEM HAPPEN.
 
I want your 2020 to be effing AMAZING too.
 
🎉🎉Are you ready to make it a year full of living?🎉🎉
 
As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
 
Are you ready for a Year Of YOU?
Availble to a limited VIP group of powerful manifestors and individuals who want to rock out and Kick A*s in 2020 I am doing a private 1:1 opportunity to change your inner world to one of high vibration, focused intention, release of fear and self- sabotaging patterns, and development of abundance skills for life, love and money.
Message me for full deet’s on this VIP 6 -week opportunity to work 1:1 with me and make 2020 a Year of Me!
Start of 2020 and activiating your Yes year to You by saying YES to this potent opportunity today.
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Let Your Metamorphosis Happen.

Are you scared of the permancy?
I know that I sure am in area’s of my life.
Let’s look at this topic of permancy.
You may be most familiar with it in the area’s of death and marriage.
 
Both seem so certain not to change.
One we enter into with the hope that it is a guarantee,
a commitment.
The other we fear happening because we “know” it is a guarantee.
 
And both feel like an ending point to most.
But many also feel like both or at least one is also a gateway to something new.
 
In truth,
both are gateways to something new.
A new existance.
Something that we cannot understand,
that we are uncertain about.
 
Both require faith.
Both require us to let go of our ego’s and to lean into the unknown.
 
And another reality is that we have permancy happening all around us,
all the time.
 
We also have this thing called death all around us, all the time.
 
We have many little deaths occure throughout our life times,
and they are requirements in order for us to expand and grow.
In order for us to become authentically US,
and stand in our power,
we MUST expereince lot’s of little deaths throughout our lifetime.
 
Your power is birthed in the running toward these deaths and the acceptance of them.
 
Instead of fearing the transition points of our life,
open yourself to them.
Allow yourself to get caught up in the current of them and enjoy the process of them.
Though some may be painful,
realize that the pain and the suffering that you are expereincing is not of the soul or even the heart.
It is of the ego and the constraights based in a concept of fear and control that is causing you the pain and suffering.
 
The SOUL knows your path.
The SOUL knows your truth.
The SOUL has no doubt.
The SOUL is not in pain.
 
But when we expereince pain and suffering,
when we fear the unknown,
when we fear the transition points and get caught up on the idea of permancy and it being some end point,
we are buying into the mirages of our ego.
 
This life you are living is far more than blood pumping through your veins,
or your lungs taking in oxygene,
or the thoughts that you say your brain or mind create.
It is far more than these limbs that you use,
or this body that you expereince.
This life,
is God moving through you.
And the permancy of this life is just that.
 
MOVEMENT.
CHANGE.
BIRTH.
BIRTH.
and more BIRTHING.
 
This process is of you brithing yourself,
you experiencing YOU,
experiencing your divine being at multiple levels of awakening.
And with each awakening you must let go of the old paradigm’s of self and understanding and you must allow for what you once percieved as YOU,
to become a carcass to be disposed of.
 
What you perceive as YOU,
is not really YOU.
 
YOU ARE MORE.
 
So much more.
And when you lean into this awareness of how bountiful and big you really are,
the fear of death is no more.
 
Instead you see it for it’s truth.
It is a birthing of your SOUL.
 
We expereince death in our relationships,
in our ways of being, relating, thinking, judging.
We expereince death of our goals, dreams, desires and beliefs.
We expereince death in actual physical states with loved ones and self.
 
And often we get caught up on these deaths.
We linger in the morning of them.
We weap and agonize ourselves about what has been lost.
We get trapped in our remorse,
in not speaking what we had wanted,
in not getting closure like we wanted.
We torment ourselves with death and its permancy of things not being the same any more.
 
We desiree to control what is not for us to control,
but instead for us to breathe into and feel life in.
This corridor of death,
is just that,
a transtioning space.
A door.
A gate.
 
Each transition point brings with it an exposure to newness,
to deeper understanding and expansion.
 
If we choose to view death as though it is birth,
the sadness is limited and potentially no more.
Not saying that one will not expereince morning,
as anytime we go through transition,
we mourn.
Mourning is natural and healthy.
But know that if you find yourself getting caught in the mourning,
that this is not of SOUL.
It is your ego at work.
Holding you in an old paradigm,
an old frequency,
and not allowing you to metamorphosis.
 
This is where the work then lyes.
To go deep into self and discover where you can unhinge your cages of the old and set yourself free.
 
You cannot avoid death.
You cannot avoid all the mini deaths within this human expereince that you will have,
they are hear to set you free and bring you closer to your soul aligned path.
 
But what you can do,
is stop allowing yourelf to just fade through this life.
You can realize that life is a choice.
Just because you are breathing,
with blood pumping through your veins and thoughts bouncing through your mind,
DOES NOT MEAN YOU ARE LIVING.
 
Living is a choice and with that living comes the movement and gateways of death.
 
And remember,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
 
Are you ready for a Year Of YOU?
Availble to a limited VIP group of powerful manifestors and individuals who want to rock out and Kick A*s in 2020 I am doing a private 1:1 opportunity to change your inner world to one of high vibration, focused intention, release of fear and self- sabotaging patterns, and development of abundance skills for life, love and money.
Message me for full deet’s on this VIP 6 -week opportunity to work 1:1 with me and make 2020 a Year of Me!
Start of 2020 and activiating your Yes year to You by saying YES to this potent opportunity today.
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Your F-ck Yes Life Depends on Your Flexibility and Willingness to Lean Into Your Edge.

I am going to be a guest on The Union – Real Talk About Personal Growth next week (January 14th). It’s been two years since my last appearance on the show and so much has changed in the course of that time.
 
This morning I finally got a moment to sit down and review some of the questions that was posted for us guests to reflect on.
 
I found myself in so much gratitude for the inquiry that was being offered as it allowed me to dig into this moment in time and where I am at, what I am currently being challeneged with.
 
The question that touched me at a deeper level than others asked was,
 
“What edge are you leaning into?”
 
I ask this question of my inner circle peep’s often, but sometimes admittedly, I forget to stop and inquire with myself on this topic.
 
Leaning into our edge is where we grow.
It’s where we expand ourselves.
It’s where we meet our soul.
And feel our heart.
 
Leaning into our edge in any area of our lives is what we all hunger for,
and typically feel this call to do just this around the turn of the new year.
 
It’s why we make the proclomations and affirmations that we do.
 
We set our intent with the DESIRE to lean into our edge and expand ourselves because we understand that without the leaning into our edge,
we can never have the life that calls to us.
 
But that edge is scary as F-ck!
Is it not?
 
It sounds so easy often to make changes,
we have this burning desire,
we have expereinced the consequences of where our current actions have gotten us and how it makes us feel,
the life path that we are currently on based on our ideas, views, beliefs and actions of yesterday,
and often we are not happy with where we are at or who we are in this moment.
 
We know that we are so much more.
And that this life of ours has so much more to give us.
 
So we hunger for change.
We desire personal development.
We crave healing.
 
And at our core,
at our core we get that the US of today cannot remain if we are to have the US of tomorrow that we want so badly for.
 
And so we lean.
Scared out of our minds,
our hearts race,
our tummies churn with anxiety.
We cautiously or hastely step forward hoping that we survive the ledge that we are on.
 
We fear falling.
We fear loosing.
We fear getting it wrong.
We fear not being accepted in our new skin.
We fear so much and it feels like we could die.
 
Many people in this leaning in back down from the ledge.
They slow their roll and get off the raggedy edge that shakes their internal cage of normalcy.
 
They step back into comfort.
Supported by excuses and good reasons as to why it’s just not time yet to make these changes.
 
Others, step a forward and pray that they survive.
Thinking to themselves that they can do it,
but doubting every step and looking at the potential risks with a passionate focus,
causing themselves to focus on the pain of change and development instead of bringing their attention to the beauty of the birth of themselves.
The raggedy edge shakes them,
and spins them until they are dizzy and exhausted.
Trying to hold onto the wheel of life they try to maintain course and control the outcome,
and then one day say,
“It’s not working!”
and lean back into the comfort of what they have always known.
 
And then there are others,
these others are CERTAIN of their SOUL guidance.
They are confident that the path is perfect and always leading them to a greater version of themselves.
Teaching them about the ebb and flow of life and how constriction leads to expansion.
They feel into all levels of emotion that rise from their own awakening into themselves and even though they may need to pause on the path to catch their breath,
they NEVER stop or turn back.
 
Pushing forward,
leaning further.
 
Allowing life to teach them the power of flexibility.
 
This is what today I came up with while jotting down my answers to the inquiries asked of me for next weeks show.
 
My realization is that this last decade,
and especially the last two or three years has shown me with great intensity the imporatnce of flexibility.
Of not getting caught up on anything and becoming ridgit to how I wish for anything to manifest or develop,
but instead to just breathe in the beauty of the transformation with certainty that it is moving me to my highest and best.
 
I bring this inquiry to you today as well.
And I ask you to really sit with the question,
 
“What edge are you leaning into?”
 
And if you have no edge,
then ask why no edge?
What am I fearing from leaning in?
And how is this serving me to be the person that I know that I can be and to have the life that I want so badly for?
 
Your power will be birthed from your flexibility in your mind and thoughts, your heart and emotions, your physical body and how you choose to move in it.
 
Lean with faith.
God/Universe has your back.
Trust in that calling you feel.
 
As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
 
Are you ready for a Year Of YOU?
Availble to a limited VIP group of powerful manifestors and individuals who want to rock out and Kick A*s in 2020 I am doing a private 1:1 opportunity to change your inner world to one of high vibration, focused intention, release of fear and self- sabotaging patterns, and development of abundance skills for life, love and money.
Message me for full deet’s on this VIP 6 -week opportunity to work 1:1 with me and make 2020 a Year of Me!
Start of 2020 and activiating your Yes year to You by saying YES to this potent opportunity today.
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The State Of You and Your Business.

Your business.
My business.
God’s business.
 
If we could only keep this in mind in our relationships, work and life expereinces.
Life becomes so much more pleasent and in flow when we live according to this understanding about business.
 
As we start off this new year,
this new decade I am already being faced with so many people coming to me caught up in the nets of anothers business,
or that of God’s.
The desire is to try and to control an outcome of something that makes one feel nervouse or frustrated because it is not happening the way they “think it should go,” but the reality is that 80% of the business happening in our lives in all subject areas, we have zero control over because it is not actually our business but that of another individual or that of God.
 
Now our ego may try and brainwash us into the idea that we can control it,
that our opinion, ideas, judgements and fears mean something in the face of the events happening,
but the reality is the opposite.
 
I use to give way to many f-cks over other people’s business or that of God’s.
I would get my panties in a wad over so many things and find myself sitting in frustration, suffering, fear, worry and exhaustion from it all.
I believed that my state of worry and desire to change things or people was worth something to me,
worth something to others,
to life or the outcome.
 
It took seven children and two ex husbands to teach me otherwise plus a a couple lovers who openned me up to the reality that all I was ever in charge of or had any amount of control over was ME.
 
My business.
 
And what is the “my business” portion of this life?
 
My business is really simple.
And the simplicity is what allows us to let go of all the chains of the need to control.
Keeping it simple is how we access our natural state of flow and well-being.
 
The state of My Business is:
👉Staying present within self and the moment.
👉Recognizing that we are all individuals that have free will and make our own choices.
👉Realizing that your need to control is a fear based reaction.
👉Realize that the ONLY things that you can control are your own thoughts, feelings and actions.
👉Underestand that a request that you make is just that, a request, not a commandment or law.
👉Know that you are the ONLY one that can make YOU happy. Happiness is an inside event first.
👉Know that you are NOT responsible for any other person’s thoughts, feelings or actions on this planet.
👉Know that everything happens for a reason and that even sometimes hardest of events is teaching each player a valuable lesson of their own.
👉Know that God does not expect you to fix it for everyone or have all the answers. Just to look within and know you are worthy of a good life and of love.
 
I still get caught up in the desire to control events and other people’s reactions or actions.
I still get caught up in the concept that I am responsible some how for what another person chooses to do,
as if I forced them into the action or feeling by doing something on my side.
I still fear loosing people in my life by stepping forward and just being me and not getting caught up in their shiz.
I still fear looking aloof,
like I do not care or love because I am choosing to do me instead of getting lost in someone else’s business.
 
But, I am here to share with you on this beautiful January morning in 2020 that all of that and more,
most likely anything that you can come up with for a reason as to how you are ceratin that you CAN ACTUALLY control something or someone,
or that you “should” sit and worry about anothers actions, ideas, etc.
are all in reality based in fear.
Based in your ego.
And are only there not because you care so much about the other or event,
but that at your core you are fearful of what it means to you.
How it will imapct you.
And what you are loosing because of this event or action.
 
It is a YOU based action to worry.
It is a YOU based action to control.
It is a YOU based action to get your panties in a wad over what someone said, did, etc.
 
And all of this is keeping YOU seperated from your happiness.
Seperated from your SOUL truth.
 
How do I know this?
Because worry feels like shit.
 
Because fear is not of our soul or of God.
Because power may feel good in the essence of having it for a moment,
but it bares with it the void of true connection, love and acceptance.
All the things that every human being desires.
 
The Business of YOU need not go any futher than the acceptance of the reality that YOU can only control YOU.
 
And the most loving thing you can do for another,
the most powerful impact that you can have on an event,
is to KNOW YOUR TRUTH.
 
Know who you are and what you are charge of.
 
Anything else is an opinion based on your life expereinces and perception which is not like any other soul on this planet.
Anything else is based on your own fears, programmed thoughts and views, hopes, desires and can never be expected to be like any other person’s.
You have no effing clue what anyone is ever feeling, thinking or what they have actually lived.
You have no concept of the path that God has set up for anyone or what thier life lessons are.
 
But by trying to step into the midst of anothers business or that of God’s you block your own truth,
your own happiness and abundance.
You cause speration.
And seperation does not feel good.
 
It feels like worry.
It feels like fear.
It feels like you are out of control.
It feels like you have lost.
It feels like a disappointment.
It feels like you are being emptied out and tied up.
 
This is not your true state of being.
 
And if you make the choice to stay in your own business from this moment forward the best you can and when you accidently step into anothers business or God’s out of an old habit to just pause and step back out of it and back into what you can have impact on,
 
Your business.
You will discover an inner peace.
A love like you have never known before.
Self- love.
And through this your reactions and ability to connect will forever be changed.
 
I wish you a year of YOU.
A year of a powerful you.
 
And as always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
 
Are you ready for a Year Of YOU?
Availble to a limited VIP group of powerful manifestors and individuals who want to rock out and Kick A*s in 2020 I am doing a private 1:1 opportunity to change your inner world to one of high vibration, focused intention, release of fear and self- sabotaging patterns, and development of abundance skills for life, love and money.
 
Message me for full deet’s on this VIP 6 -week opportunity to work 1:1 with me and make 2020 a Year of Me!
 
Start of 2020 and activiating your Yes year to You by saying YES to this potent opportunity today.
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Your New Decade Will Go How You Want It Too. Gauranteed.

Happy New Decade!
2020 is HERE! I am so excited and I got to ring in the new year just outside of Tahoe.
This year is more than just a another New Year.
It is a New Decade.
It is the start of the roaring 20’s all over again.
Just think about it.
A hundred years ago, the world went into the roaring 20’s and we the people wanted to know oursleves more. We wanted to set ourselves free from our bondage in different ways.
Women started speaking out more.
War was in the back drop,
people were struggling from a shit economy state.
Things were in upheaval,
but the people,
the people wanted for more.
And even in the midsst of everything going on in the world,
they craved MORE.
And they wanted laughter.
They wanted fun.
They wanted connection.
And they had something that many of us today struggle with.
 
They had DETERMINATION and a FAITH.
That it could happen.
That life could be better.
And they were willing to work for a better life.
 
Here we are yet again in an era where there is struggle,
war, a change in governments, uncertainty.
The rich get richer,
the poor get poorer,
and many cast their eye’s downward in fear of today and tomorrow.
 
But you do not have to be among these who fear.
You can CHOOSE differently.
You can walk your own path.
You can have an aundant life.
A turned on life.
A life where you live by your soul’s calling,
and your hearts desire.
You can.
 
I know it is possible, ‘because I have done it myself.
I have come from out of my inner depths of fear and worry.
I have learned how to face my inner dragons and not slay them but rule them and use them for what they were intended.
 
To give us a choice.
To provide us with certainty in who we are.
To teach us about our light.
 
This year is a new dacade.
It is YOUR decade love.
But you cannot have a decade of all your soul’s desires if you don’t set the tone for calling it in RIGHT NOW.
 
You have been given the free will to have the life that you want.
And that simply means to realize that you are powerful.
Your thoughts, actions and feelings determine your life.
 
Be aware in 2020 of your power.
Be aware of your TRUE feelings about things,
and act from there.
Be aware of the thoughts that you get lost in when you are daydreaming,
are you day dreaming or day nightmaring?
You have a choice.
 
But FIRST…..
You must make that choice love.
You must OWN your WORTH.
And want for that future in the roaring 20’s of now like there is no tomorrow.
But,
wanting is not enough.
You must FEEL what you want as though you already have it.
You must think the thoughts that you who has that life would be thinking.
You must be taking ACTION like the you who is already living that life would be taking.
And you MUST…
you absolutely MUST say YES! to your SOUL.
Without doubt.
Without fear of others judgements.
 
This decade is for YOU my love.
OWN it.
 
2020 demands that you have 2020 vision into what you desire for.
Into the person that you want to be and that you must become in order to have the life that you want for.
 
2020 requires YOU to be a YES to YOU.
Are you ready?
 
Let’s get goin…
 
Stop Existing & Start Living
 
Make thi sdecade GREAT by being a YES TO YOU.
 
Message me for deet’s on my 2020 January Special for A Year of Me!
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Too Busy Livin’ to Give A Shiz!

Too busy livin’ to give a shiz!
And that’s the way it is supposed to be.

When the rest of this world is caught up in competing with the Jones.
When everyone around is pointing fingers in judgement and lookin’ with a critical eye.

You will find me laughing.
Doing what feels best to my soul.
Connecting with the wild ones like myself.

When you look at me and compare your life,
Compare your relationship and your sex,
When you wonder how I live out loud and keep smiling.
When you convince yourself that I must have chosen the rougher path

Or that I am crazy.
Or somehow not happy.
That I am faking it.

You will find me making love on the golf course under the stars.
Drinking fine wine in a meadow watching fireflies light up the woods.
You will see me speaking my mind with out care,
Writing my life story,
The way that I want it.

Not the way that you or anyone else believes it should be.
No my sweet critic,
I once was you and I know the sadness that this need to judge, to compare, to try and control another or worse to try and control my own soul brought me.

I feel you.
I get you.
This virgo knows how empty you most likely feel,
And how the critical ideas of knowing more or a better makes you feel fulfilled.
Feel like a person who cares.
Who wants a better world.

I also know the expanding darkness of not seeing your own light by hiding from your truth that this way of existing brings.

You are hiding luv.
You are avoiding your truth
Your SOUL.

Insecure.
Lost.
Lonely.
Fearful.
Full of worry, wounds, and frustration.
This is the life you are choosing.
And all because you fear living.

You fear BEING YOU.
So you turn to me and you point your fingers in disgust.
You want to tell me how I should live.
Oh but honey,
I am too busy livin’ to give a shiz!
Too busy livin’,
Creating my moments,
Dancing into the masterpiece of my life and rolling in the wet paint to care what you think.

I may be messy.
I may have chaos.
I may show my feelings,
My highs and lows without remorse.

I may not be your version of perfect.
But there is something I have that you want.

I have my connection to SOUL.
I am livin’ my life.
In full expression.

And my advice to you baby,
Is to put down your judgements,
Your bitterness and your criticism.
Stop competing and comparing.
It only shows your seperation from self.

Step into love.
Step into compassion.
And give yourself permission to be YOU.

Stop hiding
And as always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers ”

Message me for deets on 1:1 coaching and my 2020 Time to Be Me New Years Program.
Limited opportunities for this powerful 6 week opportunity to full claim your truth.

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Undervalue Me, Undervalue You – It’s All the Same.

Seriously WTF!
Here I sit working with clients today, the day after a yummy relaxing Christmas, where I find myself in total gratitude.
I sit here doing some marketing,
following up with my 1:1 clients,
signing a couple new 1:1 clients and getting them started with the onborading process,
when some misunderstanding soul,
reaches out and asks:

“So what do I get for the $197 that you are offering in your 12 Days of F-cking Awesomeness Bundle?”

Now you have to understand that we online coaches/marketers and educators welcome with open arms inquiry of all kinds,
and we love making sure that our followers are happy and getting exactly what they think they are.

Matter a fact today’s online world is ALL about giving away more in value then expected.

The smart online educators, coaches know the impact that they can have and offer up a massive amount of free or low cost education and content and are feeding their followers daily.

We aim to share massive value in our online courses and workshops. We want you expanding, learning, and being the best versions of yourselves and get that not everyone can afford our private rates.

So when asked the question above,
of course I shared that this was a massive savings.
I mean shiz, you are getting up to $1800 of value and then some, because the same content in private would cost you ten’s of thousands of dollars in coaching hours.

But RIGHT NOW you save even more and get it for ONLY $197.

It’s a no f-cking duh sorta thing!!!

Litterly you could take the next year to work through your chosen bundle and come out the other side with some massive shift in your:

Money
Sex
Health
Confidence
Relationships
and life in general.

But this sweet confused soul thought that I was offering up my private coaching for $197.

OMFG!
I would go broke and be homeless and a really shitty coach to boot for under valuing myself so much if I did that.

The reality of my private coaching practice is that I fall in love with my peep’s.
I get real, raw and authentically down to the core with them.
Knowing them at levels that they may have never been seen at before and teaching just how amazing they really are.
My clients become my friends,
my family,
my tribe.

I give to them random moments on any given day to lean on me.
We text constantly.
We talk on the phone through beautiful and tradgic moments.
We grow,
share and are deeply intimate in our vulnerabilty.

And although I wish I could offer this sort of relationship for such a price of $197 or even free,

it is honestly priceless and those who work with me I am confident would second my statement here.

A coach who does not chage what they are worth,
simply does not value themselves and has not stepped into their power or self- love yet.

A coach who does not know the power of their words,
their views,
their stories and gudiance,
and offers it for free or for some rediculous price because they feel that servitude should mean being a broke a*s who is struggling instead of thriving,
simply does not believe in the value of coaching.
Or the value of who they are and what they have to offer.

They themselves don’t get it and most likely don’t have a real mentor or coach in their lives pushing them up.

And I don’t know about you but,
but who would you follow?

The person selling you snake oil because they themselves don’t get it and don’t value it.

OR.

The person who leads by example,
lives it,
breathes it,
has evidence of it and
is not afraid to value themselves.
Their time.
Their energy.
Their education and experiences.
And demands that in order for you to work with them that the first step is to do the value yourself enough to INVEST.

We all need to start somewhere when we decide that we want to work on ourselves.

We have to choose where we can start.
And aultimatley it does not matter where you start.
What matters is:
1) you start somewhere
2) you value yourself enough to invest in YOU
3) you are coachable

Everything else will follow.

My question for you today is simple.

Do you value YOU?

If you are in business for yourself are you charging what you are worth? Or are you scared of your value?

If you are wanting change in your life in any area do you value that area of your life enough to say YES to the change?
And the helping hand that you most likely will have to hire in some format to guide you to your desired outcome.

You are worth the life that you want.
You are valuable in this world and to the people you share your message with and yourlife with.

Never undervalue the work that you do.
The art that you make.
The message that you share.
Or the changes that you need tomake to have the life that you want.

When we under value anothers help,
we thus under value ourselves too.

Realize that.

And KNOW You Are VALUABLE.

I love you.

As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

Reach out to me today to learn about my 2020 New Years Resolution Special on my 1:1 coaching.

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Birth Control, Turn On, Surrender and The Truth on Female Sex

He asked if I would get on birth control for him.

We were really clicking.
The conversations,
the touch,
his kiss.
OMFG! it was hot and I wanted him so badly.
I wanted to move forward and I wanted to explore the sex.
But I did not want any more children.
I had five children already and I was not interested in having any more at this point,
especially not risking it this early in the game of a new relationship.
Plus, even though something inside of me truly trusted that this man was clean,
I knew that you just never know,
and disease is a serious thing.

Weeks went by and the desire for each other grew as the days passed. Finally I decided that I trusted him enough to go bare with him in sex and that I “should” just make sure that no babies came from this,
so I went and got myself on the pill.

I had not been on birth control for the last 5 plus years, my system was clear of anything of the sort and I was feeling good. I felt emotionally stable after having one of the lowest points in my life in a deep dive into depression prior to getting off of birth control. My body was strong and I felt great in my skin. My health was awesome.

What could go wrong?

I wanted this man.
I wanted this sex,
this expereince.
The intimacy of bare sex.

And so why not make sure to guard us against the one thing that I knew we did not want.

A child.

I got on the pill.
Everything seemed normal enough for a few months.
No big red flags waving.
My moods were normal, nothing too rocky.
No weight gain or fatigue.

But then I crossed over the 90 day mark.
Then I felt weepy.
Sad.
Depression was setting in again.
Weight started to slowly come on,
just a few poundss but I noticed it.
And my desire for sex,
the reason I had decided to start taking birth control again anyway,
yeah the desire for it was dwindling.
I was feeling each day more lost in who I was.
I felt the mask I had worked so hard at letting go of,
being picked back up again.
Now instead of laughing authentically and enjoying my life,
I found myself working ever so hard just to maintain composture and not get mad or cry for no reason.

My emotions were out of control.
I felt like I had time lapsed back a decade and I could not figure out what was happening or why.
Never did I think it was the birth control.

Months went by.
My sex dried up.
I was no longer the woman that he met,
and I also found myself to not be attracted to him any longer.
It was like we were completely different people,
and I for one was for sure.

The once beautiful possibility of a lovely relationship came to an end and I found myself bouncing around with a few other quick flings,
searching for the woman that I had lost somewhere along the line and wondereing why I was attracting these men that I really did not care for but seemed drawn too.

And then,
then I stoped taking the birth control.
I committed to my health and well being and I decided that if I were involved with someone sexually that I could just use a condom and not rely on this hormone imbalancer.
Not long there after I went in for my pap-smear and was told of cells on my cervix that were irregular.
The doctor let me know her concern of what this could mean.
I did some deep detoxing and investigating on what I could do to naturally irradicate these irregular cells.
I discovered that there was ton’s of studies done on birth control and the links to different types of cancer and cell mutation.

In my research I found out that it took up to 2-years to clear your system of birth control. To my plesent surprise I I was blessed with a clean bill of health again after crossing over the two year mark from taking the pill.
PLUS, guess who was back in her own flesh.
Emotionally stable again.
Focused.
Healthy weight.
And turned on,
plus able to have good orgasms again.
Yes! I was back.

And for the first time in my adult years I had fully digested the connection between how delicate my hormones were and how easily they could be set off,
causing massive issues from depression and lack of desire, to actual cancer.

PLUS, I discovered the science showing how birth control can and does change who we are attacked too. Explaining why so often we find ourselves with someone that we typically would not be attracted too without the extra hormones in our system.

And my question came,
“Why would a man who loves a woman ever desire to put her into this situation just so he did not have to wear a condom?”

“Why woudl a woman take this sort of risk with her health?”

“Why would we willingly put something in our bodies that could change who we are attacted too and expect it not to make that big of a difference in our relationship success?”

and finally….

“Why is this never spoken of? Not made public knowledge when the facts are out there and not that hard to discover?”

The answer is simple,
We just don’t know.
We have not been informed.
And we have been focused on population not on health.
An educated person will gaurd against having unwanted children and at the same time will want what is best for their own health and well being as well as their partners, as well as wanting to be attracted to people that are a match for them verses the opposite.

But the education is not there.
And the desiree to inquire,
to seek out the truth is spoken of often but hardly ever followed.

Today I ask you to STOP the insanity of living blind in your sex and relationships and to actually inquire, witness and do your work or learning yourself, and knowing what is good for you as well as those you merge with.

This is maturity.

As Always Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers’

Message me for deets on 1:1 coaching and education today.

 

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What You Are Accpeting For Your Norm, Is NOT Who You Are.

It’s not your NORM.
But it feels like it is.
It may be common,
it may be abundant in your life,
But I swear to you…

It’s not your NORM.

And what am I referring too?
I am referring to that feeling of anger.
That feeling of fear.
That feeling of judgment, bitterness, shame, guilt,
Or even questioning.

Your worry is not normal.
Your suffering is not normal.
No matter how prevalent it may seem,
It’s still is not your NORM.

I tell you this with certainly,
That when you feel out of sorts,
when you are caught in negative emotion,
When you feel rageful, vengeful and vindictive.
This is not normal.
This is not who you are.

You sit in such comfort with your chronic ideas of what just is. Accepting life for how you have been told to view it. You watch your life drift by never fully engaging with ALL that you are.

Always searching for happiness,
But only ever gaining small morsels of it at best.

Believing that the drama is normal.
That its just how life is.

But you KNOW at your core its not true.
You know because you are looking for who you are always. You feel the seperation from your truth.
From your SOUL.

There is this strange calling inside of you.
A feeling of something more.
A sensation of your greatness.
But you are trapped under the misery that feels like the reality you must live.

It’s not your NORM.
Your norm is that of love.
Of feeling good.

Now that may sound a bit 60’s flowers child for you.
A little too new age even.
But its the actual truth of who you are and what your state of normal is to be and always is at your SOUL level.
The discord you feel is simply because you are not looking at any given situation through the eyes of God or SOUL. You are viewing it from the disadvantage point of forgetfulness of who YOU ARE.

You have turned your back and closed your eyes to love and THIS is what is causing your worry, fear and suffering.

But there is blessing in your pain

The blessing is the lesson of learning what you do mot want from life and the building of desire for what you do want.

All you need do to embrace the life you want so badly for is to STOP ACCEPTING this ill state of feeling.
Stop allowing yourself to fall prey to what you have always perceived as normal and instead see it for the blessing that it is.

There to reveal to you that you are out of alignment with SOUL.

That you are buying into a faulse reality instead of what is true and you are putting value on things that do not matter nearly as much as you believe.

Soul is not upset about that car cutting you off on the highway.
Soul is not upset that your child drew on the wall.
Soul is not upset that your spouse is not acting the way you want or think you need.
Soul is not upset that the government is doing what it is doing or that your friends said the things they said.

Soul knows that all happens for a reason.
That each event in life is stepping you closer to what you want and that the ONLY thing holding you back is this crazy concept of what you call normal.

Are you ready to embrace the truth?
Are you ready to finally say YES TO SOUL?
Then take the step needed.
The only step ever needed and let go of upur suffering.
Your worry and fear.
Your regrets and your shame.
Let go of your needing someone or something to be different then what it is.
Let go of your you negative vibe.
And JUST LET YOUR HEART BE FELT.
Your soul lead.

You know who you are.
Be you.

And as always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers “`