You Are Worthy Of Authentic Love.

 
It’s high time beautiful that you STOP the silliness of always saying yes when you mean no.
 
Yeah I see you over there.
faking that smile.
Faking that reaction.
Feeling like you have too,
when in truth you just simply are not all that in to that shiz.
 
But you still say yes.
You say yes because its programmed into you to say yes.
You say yes because you don’t want to rock the boat,
you do not want to cause a confrontation,
you most certainly don’t want to feel separation.
 
What does it matter any way?
Your opinion, your needs or desires.
You are a nice person.
You are not greedy.
You are not selfish.
You put other’s first.
Just the way you were taught.
 
I get it.
 
The issue is that you are dried up.
You are worn out.
You just keep saying yes and thinking that your yes will fill you up because giving is so good.
 
Except you forgot to give to the most important person beautiful.
 
You forgot to take care of the most valuable player in your life.
 
YOU.
 
And so you now have so little of you left to give.
You are fatigued,
lost and off centered.
You don’t have the stamina or energy to keep going and you most likely are questioning if you can.
 
But you just said another inauthentic yes to someone,
and so you must.
You must keep your head up and smile.
 
You are afraid that if you state your truth.
If you say NO –
that this relationship you are giving yourself away for will be no more.
You are afraid you will be judged, criticized, hurt someones feelings, or worse yet be abandoned by them.
 
If you really stop and feel into this,
you should see the silliness of this idea.
If this relationship is meant to be,
if it is a friendship,
a love based relationship,
a relationship that is based on truth and trust…
then why would it go away just because you are a no to something?
 
Now, if the relationship is based simply on you doing what the other wants and needs at all cost,
and you not getting your needs met,
or there is zero allowance for your authenticity,
then perhaps it is high time that you reconsider the value of this relationship in your life.
 
Perhaps you should look at this relationship and question what exactly you are making yourself available for and WHY?
 
Does this relationship make you happy?
Does it fulfill you?
Do you feel like this relationship is equally yoked?
 
Or are you just bending over backward out of fear of being alone.
Out of fear of loss.
Fear that there is nothing better than this,
that you are not deserving of it?
 
Well, I want you to realize that YOU ARE WORTHY of love.
 
And any relationship that says that it is love but demands you to NOT be authentic to get this love, is NOT LOVE.
 
It’s a LIE.
 
You deserve much better than this.
And deep in your heart you know it is true.
It is what pulls at you when you find yourself holding yourself and trying to comfort yourself when you actually need the arms of your relationship.
 
It is that sick feeling that comes up in your stomach when you say yes to something but you know that it is not really for you, but you do it anyway.
 
It is that nervousness or that physical constriction that manifests itself when you agree and push yourself to be/do something that you are not.
 
YES YOU KNOW.
 
And it is truly high time that you STOP the silliness of saying yes when you are actually a no.
 
In saying your authentic truth you will gain respect,
you will feel more confidence,
you will be embraced more by life and others,
you will be trustworthy.
And guess what those people that DO LOVE YOU,
will still be there.
The one’s who were only there for your hand outs, your service and how you made them feel without care of you,
well they will no longer be there.
 
Or they will see you differently and love you for your truth.
 
Either way,
you are worthy of true love.
But in order for you to have it,
you have to start being true to yourself.
And love yourself enough to speak your heart.
 
Say YES.
Say YES to YOU.
Not to everyone else.
 
And as always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
 
It’s time that you start to say YES to the most important person in the room beautiful. It’s time that you accept your worth, and step onto this path that your SOUL is calling you too.
I know how hard the steps may appear.
I know that you are fearful, that you doubt if you have what it takes to make this shiz happen for you or not.
But I promise you that YOU can do it.
You can have it.The first step though is to recognize that you must let go and have faith in your process of getting there.
Listen to your SOUL and follow it’s lead.
Imagine having a coach who has been on a similar path guide you, help you discover the deeper meanings of what soul is wanting you to know.
What would it feel like to have that sort of support and guidance?
You can have this.
Message me for deet’s on 1:1 Private mentoring and coaching today.

I am looking for a girlfriend experience….

I am looking for a girlfriend experience…

I can’t help it, men wake up with cum on the brain…

It’s your fault, you are so hot, I just cannot control myself…

You teach tantra, so that means that you will have sex with me…

I want to sex you…

So what do you think? (insert below average unsolicited dick pic here)

And so many other statements that we coaches, educators, tantra teachers and WOMEN GET DAILY.

And I have left some of the more raunchy ones off of this list.

If I shared what gets stated and shown to me frequently via Facebook messenger and other lines of social media and randomly to my email or phone I would get kicked off of Facebook. Funny little note here, if I report someone on Facebook for sexual harassment or aggressive statements or out of standard pictures I get to keep the pictures and messages, it is left up to me to dispose of them. But if I say one word that someone scrolling through see’s and is upset about then my posting is trashed and I am booted for three days…FAIR????🤔

My rant here is because I want to bring to light the ill ideas that so many have of women in general.

How so many (sorry men, but it is effing true) men think it okay, normal, ACCEPTABLE and even appreciated to message and make the comments that they do to random women they do not know or even ones that they do know.

The above leading statement, “I am looking for a girlfriend experience.” was recently messaged to me here on Facebook from an old client of mine who after yesterdays communications has been blocked and is on the cusp of having a restraining order served if he does not simmer his ass down.

YES! He took it that far.

It is hard to rattle me.
It is difficult to get to me with the distasteful pictures and comments.
I typically just delete after a good laugh. 🤣🤣🤣
With no message back.
Every now then when I am hormonal or just in a bitchy mood and had enough of the shenanigans that these pervs who seem to be dressed up as adult men send out,
on these days,
these days I get a little sarcastic.
And fire back something. 📣🤣🤦‍♀️
I consider it tossing my ego some breadcrumbs.
As I do so much work to keep light on my ego and stay aware of where it is and how it is trying to control me.

But then this shiz 💩happens.
An old client solicits me for sex.
Assuming it is okay.
Assuming that I would I guess be excited at his proud offer.
And then to his dismay, I say – NO! 😱

Sorry sir, I don’t do that.
I don’t sleep with my clients.
I don’t do sexual things with my clients.
If you want to do a coaching appointment over dinner, yes we can .
If you want and extended coaching session, yes we can do that too.
You want me to listen and give you connection that way, yes we can do that too.
You want a hug. – yes I will give you a hug if you need it.

Oh wait, you want me to come to your hotel room and stay the effing night????? ( scratching my head as I wonder where he got this idea from🤔)

Ummmmm…. let me see if that is in my pay grade? or desire grade?

Ohhhhhhhhh…..

F-CK NO!!!!!!!!!

Yeah.
And yet so many men out there think that we women will be ecstatic to just have a guy message and say, ” I wanna f-ck you.” or ” I love you. So lets have sex. Let me touch you here and there. Do this and that to you. I can show you want a real man is like.”

And we women are to go weak at the knees I guess.
And get wet, and be like “Oh my God, my soulmate has arrived! YES. YES. YES. Please, take me. Let me bend over for this two pump chump that I have been dreaming of.”

LOL.
Right?

Oh I know what will make it better.
This chick she is hot and she teaches on sex.
I will offer to pay her for the two pumps.
That will be appealing.
That will seal the deal.

SERIOUSLY GUYS?

And these same men will proclaim themselves Conscious Men.
Spiritual Men.
Emotionally Mature Men.
Wise Men.
Understanding Women Men.

Of which none really apply.

I am a woman who loves men.
I love supporting men.
I love working with men.
I love seeing men become better men.
Having the love, the relationships, the sex and abundance that they want.

But with someone that is not me.
Unless you are my boyfriend. My lover.
Which FYI is NOT an easy place to get.

Women can be easy for sure.
Some more than others.
And this has a lot to do with a lot of things.
But most women who love themselves, respect themselves and KNOW WHAT THEY WANT.

Will not bed easy.
Or with just anyone.
And for certain not with these FOOLS!

Sorry wantabe gents, I only provide a girlfriend experience to my boyfriend.
And he is my boyfriend because he is at least wise enough to not make these stupid assumptions.

SO this rant, is for all you ladies out there.
Single or taken.
No matter your relationship status,
no matter your body type,
no matter your background,
religion,
career,
education level,
or ethnic background.

I know we all get this SHIZ consistently and it sucks.
So the next time a dude sends you a unsolicited dick pic and says what do you think baby?
Simply say, ” I think you should not be sending me child pornography and I am reporting this.”

Guys, you can call me whatever name you want right now, and if you are calling me names and taking offense then you might be one of these dudes I am speaking of.

In Jeff Foxworthy terms, “Here’s Your Sign!”

This may be a controversial post…
This may have some anger and frustration attached,
and I am NOT claiming that all men are this way ( thank goodness you are not or we women would be very upset and lonely) What I am saying is that –
💩💩💩THIS SHIZ IS NOT OKAY!!!💩💩💩

Guy’s you have got to realize that if all you think you have to offer is that little picture and some fowl words, some begging and then some anger when you get NOTHING but crickets or go the eff away….

That YOU have got some inner work to do.
You have got to learn some things about women and life.
We don’t owe you anything, certainly not our sex.
Maybe a blocking on social media… but our thanks and appreciation for this crap is not owed.

You want to have a chance with a women,
appeal to her mind and heart.
Women DO NOT operate like men.
Your pictures will not captivate us and make us want you.
And we typically don’t let sex rule our lives.
Or our actions.
And if you really want a woman,
then you need to F-CKING EARN HER!

Become a man.
Start there.
We are not babysitters.
We are not wanting the immaturity,
the disrespect

Your dick….
Your sexual comments are NOT A TURN ON.

Got it?
I sure as eff hope so.

But sadly the men who need to read this,
WILL NOT.

And to the rest of you men out there,
who this does not apply too.

THANK YOU!!!!🙌

Keep doing you!
The world needs more GOOD MEN.

Okay rant over.

As Always,
Stop Existing ( And settling for so little) & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

Want to learn what women really want?
Stop allowing average or worse into your love life.
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Not All Gifts Are Gifts, You See.

I got this for you.
I got you this thing.
I got you this thing that I had to get you.
I am sure you will love it.
I know you will.
I got this for you.
It’s my favorite,
and is your’s now too.

Oh you said that you like that.
And so I it is true.
That now all you want,
is this thing.
Over and over,
I will never venture out.
I am not looking at what you say,
or do,
all I can focus on is making sure that you have this thing till you want it no more.

I love you.
I like you.
I adore you.
I cannot get enough of you.
And so it must be so,
that you too,
feel this thing I am feeling,
and want it as much.

I desire this to happen,
I crave it so much,
My mind wants to devour you,
as my body wants to taste and feel.
I cannot hear your words of denial,
I cannot allow myself to pay heed,
no you,
you must want this too.

It is a gift that I give you.
And even though you say no,
I know that you want this.
Because it is true.

Your words are like nails on a chalk board,
why do you argue with me?
Your silence is deafening,
why don’t you give thanks for all that I do?

It must mean more to you.
I must be with you.
I know that you feel something,
you say it is nothing,
you say it cannot be so.
But,
I love you.
I adore you.
I want more of you.
So it is this way.

My desire has me blinded.
My hunger has me deaf.
My heart pains at your denial,
so I will show you,
yes I will.

I know that you will love it.
I know it will be so.
Just give me this moment.
To absorb all you are.
Stop making such a big deal of it.
Why are you hiding over there?
I know that you will love it.
So let me show you my dear.

You make me feel so alive.
You make me smile with your presence.
You make me feel superhuman,
so accept this gift I am giving.
Accept this “love” I am offering.
Stop denying it.
You know you want it.
You know you love it.
You like it.
You want it.
You do.
—————————————————————————

A tale I hardly speak of is the tale of being a rape survivor,
however I wish to express this today as when I walk through this world, I see so many rapes in so many different fashions.

The above is a share that was activated by a trigger from someone in my life recently.

Although there was no harm done,
although I am certain that there was no intent of such,
not even a trigger.
I find it my mission, to speak out loud and have a voice for all those who cannot.

So bare with me here,
as what I am saying may possibly cause you ill feelings,
for your guilt as much as any other human for the rape offenses that we all have made and played down without notice to the messages of ego shared.

No matter what it is.
No matter the gift.
Realize this…
Not all gifts are gifts you see,
for a gift can only truly be received in love when the receiver desires the gift,
wants for it some way,
or truly is something that speaks their name.
But, many a gift has nothing to do with the receiver,
and everything to do about the giver,
who longs to be seen.
To be accepted.
To be loved.
At all cost they will go.
Not noticing the one that they love.
They place their hunger before the heart of another.

No matter the event,
no matter the intimacy shared.
If it is not two sided in wanting,
then it is nothing more than a taking.
You think it is romantic,
you think is sweet,
you think is no big deal,
but when we steal an intimacy with another,
we ignore all that they are.
We crave more for our desire.
We fear more about our pain,
our rejection of not getting,
of not having or experiencing,
what we want is all that matters,
and so we paint a picture of what will be and ignore all the strokes of anything different.

A kiss,
a hug,
a tender touch you see.
All can be innocent and precious,
but when not wanted they are a trespass.
Just as the gift that one might give that is not desired,
can be nothing more than a nuisance.
A problem you see.
We trespass others in so many ways.
From touches to things.

Be aware is all that is stated here.
A lesson for me and you.
We all are guilty of taking.

Ask yourself this,
“This action, this thing, these words that I share: are they from my desire to have what I want or give what is wanted?”

As always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

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Level up your relationships.
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((Don’t Dry F-ck Your Woman’s Emotions – Rare Is The Man Who Understands This))

Dry F-cking My Emotion’s.
This is the statement of today that resonates it’s eerie truth about my heart and soul. And if it lingers and speaks to me,
I am sure that it will call to many others as well.
 
((The Depths Of The Goddess Can Only Be Revealed In Trust – Rare Is The Man Who Understands This))
 
We open ourselves up,
full body, mind and soul.
We awaken in beauty,
ready to receive love and be love,
and we long to dance.
We want to be breathless in the arms of our lover.
We want to be carried away.
At a woman’s core,
there is something that know’s that it wants her lover to take her.
Take her not in some dominant fashion of control.
But take her into her depths,
where she can open,
surrender and devour life more fully.
We know that we have this inside of us.
We feel our passion,
our truth,
our goddesshood,
but to fully tap in we must venture out into the seas of the unknown.
We must trust.
We must be willing to expand,
reveal and surrender.
These waters that we must dive into allow our true beauty to be seen and felt,
are filled with emotion,
filled with desire,
filled with our dreams, hopes and fears.
These are the waters of vulnerability.
Where a woman can only venture when she fully trusts at a deep level her lover and herself.
 
However, when she does expand into these pools of deep soul and reveal herself she offers more than just a vision of ecstasy.
She offers her truth.
She offers her core.
She gives her very heart over and trusts that it will be adored and loved as much as she is loving her mate.
Here her lover will experience what he may never have known existed.
Here her lover may see beauty that only he had read about once upon a time in a poem or fable.
Here he will feel himself,
at a level that he has never tasted before.
And he will find it intoxicating.
 
Not knowing exactly how he arrived in this strange land of the divine feminine,
he finds himself in a candlelit setting,
a room where his soul has always wanted to be,
but uncertain as to his worthiness of being there,
he may question it or not even truly see where he is at.
 
As he dances with her,
swimming beside her in these emotions of love and freedom, fire and passion, he fears what he has never tasted before and yet craves for more.
Until he can handle no more.
These waters are strange,
they are dark and light,
he is uncertain at to where the tides will carry him,
and often he chooses to abandon the dance before he is carried too far out from his shore of comfort.
And so,
without even trying he finds himself asking for her depth.
Asking her to reveal more of her beauty.
Asking her to trust him more fully.
To allow him to carry her.
Hold her.
And go deeper.
But doing so as he swims away.
Back further and further he swims.
With each backward stroke he moves himself away.
Wondering why she turns around.
Why her beauty is fading.
Why her truth is harder to hear.
And as they drift apart,
he remembers her not any more as the goddess that opened him to his rapture,
he no longer longs to dive into her waters and explore or caverns of mystery,
he no longer desires to discover what lies beneath and makes her swirl.
No he quickly forgets her mystery.
He looses himself in the comforts of what he had known before.
Where life was just about the shore.
Where he sat and looked out at the waters,
unable to feel them.
 
And the goddess,
left to drown in her own waters,
seeing the dryness of his shoreline,
realizes how he will never truly be able to hold her.
Never truly be able to carry her heart.
For the sand can never hold water forever.
It can only appear too.
and then it will sink.
Sink into its own space.
And rest there.
 
The goddess finds herself.
Because this is the only one who can ever hold her.
Who can carry her.
She knows of the beauty of love,
she craves it all the same.
As deeply as the pain may bury itself in her heart,
she knows of its bliss.
She loves its dance.
She will never stop searching the shorelines.
 
And as these shore’s cut into her waters,
asking for her depth,
wanting her to reveal all the mysteries in freedom to them,
she moves forward,
swallowing them up for moments and sending them back to the land they call home,
leaving them with a faint memory.
A calling from her soul.
And she searches.
Searches for the ONE.
The ONE that can swim in her waters.
The ONE that can watch the sunset and rise on her waters,
bask in her reflection,
never tire of her expanding depth,
never run from her tide pools,
never sink into his fear.
 
Rare is the man who understands this truth of a woman.
 
As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
 
Want to learn more about how to reveal your woman’s heart and soul?
 
Want to understand the true nature of a woman?
What opens her up?
Turns her on?
And draws her near?
Well then gentlemen,
Don’t wait for her storms to devour you.

Sex, Love and Fear.

Snuggles.
Intimacy.
Kisses.
Time shared.
SEX!

Mmmmmmmm….. sounds good, huh?
Sounds like something you want.
That you desire more of in your life.
Me too!

I sit here this morning contemplating so many things,
and I often find myself excavating past lessons so that I do not repeat them in current time and space.
As I analyze things, especially how I choose to do relationship I see how difficult I might be to have a serious one with.
And I do not believe that it is the fact that I enjoy multiple people in my life that is the difficult thing.
What is difficult for most is my integrity about it.
I share openly about my feelings.
About my past.
About my desires.
I share how I feel.

The issue is that we are taught that we should not want anything more than the relationship we have.
That the relationship we have is to complete us,
to make us happy, and to provide all our needs.
If it does not then under no conditions should you turn to someone else to get this met.
ESPECIALLY someone you may be attracted too or them to you.

I hear the statement,
” Be cautious of the situation you put yourself in.”

I hear the concern in this statement.
I hear the plea of if you hang around people you like, are attracted too then you may stray,
and straying equates to you leaving.
Because you have to make a choice.
Because there is ONLY so much love to go around.
Because you cannot have multiple relationships successfully.
Because it makes ME uncomfortable.

Okay, here is where I get a little uncomfortable.
Uncomfortable in my truth.

My truth is that I can NEVER go back to a way of living where I shut myself down from the world,
from other people,
and/or from men.
I f-cking love my male friends and lovers.
Whether current lovers of not, I may be enjoying time with them.
And when it is imposed on me that I need to not do this,
I feel shackles being put on me and on my emotions,
my heart,
my desires,
my energy.
And YES you better believe I will be making a choice.

I am poly my nature.
In all things I do.

I do love many.
I do enjoy many.
And may be likely to have intimacies in multiple ways with a few.

The one’s who capture my heart,
capture my essence for a season of our lives dancing together,
are the one’s who are confident enough in themselves and who get the difference between love and need.
Who can embrace my feminine wave of love.
These are the ones or THE ONE that will hold me a lifetime.

Now I am not speaking on sex here.
When I say intimacy,
I mean depth in revealing.
Sex can be this intimacy,
however sexing will only be as deep and intimate as we allow ourselves to be revealed in it.
Sex can just be that, sex.
It can be friction based and meaningless.

Sex does not mean love.
Sex does not mean commitment.
Sex does not mean intimacy.

Sex is a communication tool,
a physical communication tool .
And if you show up at only a surface level in your daily interactions with a lover,
then your sexing will only mimic the same.
Surface sex.
If you have depth, intimacy, surrender, authenticity in your daily interactions then your sex can go to this level as well,
or it can still be held in a place of disconnect if we are letting everything be heard in other ways but are scared to speak our truth in the bedroom.

Sex DOES NOT mean intimacy.
or love.

It can however deepen our intimacy and love.
It all depends on our level of surrender with our partner.

In the land of poly,
many believe that poly means to have multiple sexual partners. But this is not true,
poly is about something much more frightening than sex.
It is about LOVE.

Loving multiples.
And in love we can go deep with someone,
and we might open the gateway to sex.
Good sex.
Might I even say gourmet sex?
Because of the love,
because of the more authentic relating.

But poly DOES NOT equate to sex,
lot’s of sex,
or sex with many.

You can be monogamous in your sexing, 
and polyamorous in your relating and intimacy sharing.

And you can have success in this.
Just like you can have success in an open relationship with open sexing, or a swinging relationship.
Just like you can have success in a monogamous relationship.

A successful relationship is not about the sexual labels you put on it.

It is based on the confidence that each party has in themselves first, the self-love they have, and their ability to show up authentically in the realtionship. Which means authentic communication.

Year spent together does not equate a successful relationship.

Happiness does.
Unconditional love, and forward moving growth,
individually and together gives you opportunity to have this.

The most happy people on the planet are the one’s who have multiple close relationships. The healthiest people are the same.
Healthy mentally, emotionally and physically.
All requires intimacy shared.

Closing yourself off to the world is a death sentence in an essence.

Closing yourself off to the world and ONLY allowing intimacy to be shared with but ONE is putting all your eggs in one basket and putting an unrealistic expectation on the ONE. As well, as expecting that you as an individual can survive with only this one food source.

Because relationships are food.
They are emotional, mental, spiritual food.
They effect our body, mind and soul.
They impact us at a deep level.
And not having them does not mean that we are not effected.
Avoidance of relationship DOES equate avoidance of your heart and soul.
It is hiding from all the intimacy and truth that you are meant to share.

We hide out of fear of getting hurt.
We choose to not get involved,
to not catch feelings,
out of fear of getting burned.

If we do step into a relationship,
we then revamp our whole world and expect our partner to do the same, by not having relationship outside of the primary relationship. Often this simply means to pull away from anyone that there may potentially be “feelings” for.
And we do this out of fear.
Fear of loss.
Fear of being abandoned.
Fear of having too much love.
We close off because our ego’s affirm to us that it is not safe to love.

NEWSFLASH!
Love will not hurt you.
Love is not limited.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.” ( 1 Corinthians 13:4-8)

So why do we fear it so?
Why do we handcuff it so?
Why do we cover it with our self-centered need?

Because we do not understand.
And we equate many a thing to be love.
We fear what we do not know.
We fear what we cannot control.
We fear that we will loose if we love,
therefore we choose to turn our backs on love,
as we embrace its doppelganger of lust and need.

Authentic loving,
is authentic relating.
Authentic intimacies,
come in many ways and are what brings joy and surrender to all relationship.

Sex is never a reason to fear loss.
Love will never create loss.

The only reasons we change seasons with a relationship is because we have either out grown the relationship or have not grown to the next level within it,
or it was based on need ( not love) and those needs are no longer being met.

Level up your love life,
by tapping into your authentic self.
Embody yourself and open to love.
This is the answer to your happily ever after.

As always,
Stop Existing & Start Living

If you are ready to make the leap then reach out to me today. I am running a Christmas special where you get 2-months of coaching for FREE. Check it out and use the SANTAGIFT code in the why you want to work with me section.

No One Gives A Sh*t About Your Troubles.

No one really cares if you succeed or not.
No one really gives a rat’s rear end if you pay your bills or not.
No one really ultimately gives a shit.
How do I know this is true?
 
Well think about it…
Your friend tells you about their troubles,
the man next door shares about his job loss,
the woman at the school shares she has cancer,
your aunt says that she is terminal,
Your kid says that they are stressed about this or that,
your buddy at work get’s canned.
 
Sad but true.
These events happen every day.
You hear about them,
and you say,
OMG! I am so sorry.
I will pray for you.
You ask what you can do.
You feel bad for a few moments or even revisit the feeling here and there through out the day,
but at the end of the day,
you sit down on your couch,
you snuggle with your kids or your spouse,
or crash alone,
you watch whatever series on TV that you are caught up in,
and you ignore the miseries of others.
 
Right?
So why think that anyone else is doing something different when you share your sob stories.
 
the reality is that no one really cares if you succeed.
And to top it off,
almost everyone will eat away at your
TIME
ENERGY
MONEY
HEART
and whatever else they can absorb from you in the process.
 
Your friends,
Your family,
and any one that you allow too,
will step into your life and enjoy all that you have to give,
and keep taking from you until you say no,
or drop from exhaustion.
 
So why do so many of us, ‘find ourselves wrapped up in other people’s drama, if this is true?
 
Why do we allow for others to just leach off of us,
if at the end of the day it does not really matter?
 
Why do we extend ourselves to the point of breaking in some fashion, if no one really gives a shit?
 
Now I know that this may seem a little pessimistic here.
And I am not saying that we should not help.
That we should not ask for help.
 
What I am wanting to do is bring attention to the harsh reality of being human and living in a world of fellow humans.
 
We are all greedy mother f-ckers.
 
We want what we want and we want it for ourselves.
Even when we are “helping another” it is for ourselves.
 
It is most likely our ego,
wanting a pat on the back in some fashion,
even if it is just from ourselves to say, ” Yeah, I am a good person.”
 
Here is the reality,
here is the thought behind this share,
so often,
this aspect of our ego’s that desires to be just that,
“A good person,”
will lead us down the path of filling up our schedules with other peoples business.
 
The business that leads us to no where land.
The business that takes us into stress,
into chaos, and misery.
Worry and doubt.
The business that if we get real with ourselves,
we are stepping into because of our own fear of moving forward.
 
And so we fiddle around in this or that,
being a good person.
 
Taking the short term payout,
of feeling good about ourselves,
all the while,
denying our dreams.
 
When we allow others to dictate,
to control,
and to take priority on our schedules.
and in our lives,
our thoughts,
we hand over our power to them .
And we in essence say,
” I am sure that you will put me before you and do what is in my best good.”
We say,
” I have weak or no boundaries.’
” I do not value my own time or energy.”
” I need a reason to be a victim.”
 
And we do these things,
because yes we want to be good people.
We want to be liked.
We want to help others.
We feel lead to do them.
 
All great reasons.
However, all ego based.
 
And these ego based reason.
will NEVER lead us to the results in our lives that we desire.
They will only lead us to something other than success.
And that would be FAILURE.
 
And we will continue to experience this as long as we over give of ourselves based in ego.
 
If you want to claim that F-ck Yes Life.
If you want to build a multi-six or seven figure business.
If you want to have a phenomenal relationship.
Or any other dream or goal,
then you have to stop f-cking around.
And you have to make YOU #1.
Because no one else on this planet is going to,
and nor should they.
 
It is high time that you go do what you need to do,
to become whom you need to become.
 
Stop making excuses by getting caught up in everyone’s else’s live’s,
INSTEAD get caught up in your own.
 
Say YES to the most important person in your life.
YOU.
 
And as always,
Stop Exisiting & Start Living

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The Goddesses Dragon – My Tale of Surrender to the Masculine

He wants my surrender.
I can feel it at my greatest depths.

He wants me fully.
Open and inviting to his everything.
He wants my surrender,
and he is willing to work for it.
He is willing to take the journey into the depths of my being,
where he will uncover my hidden treasures,
which I fear may seem like dragons,
yet he assures me in his holding,
that he does not want to slay my dragons,
he only want to bask in their beauty,
he wants to sit with them in moments of stillness,
and he wants to just take them in.

He wants to see their beauty,
that beauty that only a deep understanding of love can handle,
that beauty that is so revealing of the soul.
Most are not strong enough within themselves to face this beauty,
this light,
this power,
the dragon.

Most fear being devoured by it.
What they begin in the courting process admiring from a afar,
they end with wanting to own and control.
Because it scares them.
It is wild,
it is fierce,
it is powerful beyond measure,
and desires to conquer the hearts of its admirers.

Few are able to hold themselves,
within the presence of this beast.

But, every now and then,
a gentleman comes about,
makes himself known,
and smiles in the presence of the magic he has found in caverns of the goddess.

And this gentleman,
this gentleman,
ignites the goddesses soul.
Sets it on fire.

And she desires to dance for him.
She desires to open herself for him,
and let him in.

Yet she is scared beyond measure,
her past tells of beautiful love saga’s,
intense love and loss.
She is fearful to become vulnerable with this man.
Because of the pain,
the pain that her heart will endure.
Yet she desires it all.
The love and depth,
are worth the pain.
Are worth the standing before her own dragon,
and smiling within its flames.

She know’s that this man,
is rare, and unique.
That he is one who can hold her fire.
At least for a time.
And she wants to surrender.
She craves the intimacy.
She craves the revealing.
She craves the integrity.
And the opening.

Physically.
Mentally.
Emotionally.

She leans in.
And she drops into his arms,
resting in his strength.
Resting in his admiration.
She let’s her emotions be seen.
She laughs,
she cries,
and she opens a bit more.

This cavern is deep.
And she realizes,
that her dragon is not to be feared.

She now understands what this gentleman has known,
the fire of her dragon will not harm when lifted in love,
it will only light the way to more caverns for them to explore.

Explore together.
The depths of their souls.

And so she looks at the gentleman,
with tears streaming from her eye’s,
and she say’s yes to the opening.

They lay together, enwrapped in the moment,
and they smile.

Blessed be to all of you who read this and venture into the depths of the goddesses caverns with hearts on fire,
and souls ignited.

Be wise in your journey and know that the dragon is there to protect the goddess from those that are unworthy,
and there to guild those who are,
into her surrender.

As always,
Stop Existing & Start Living

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Why Saying No to $60k May Keep You In Soul Alignment.

What would you give to make an extra $60,000 a year?
What would you sacrifice for this?
Would you be willing to step out of soul alignment for a good chunk of change?
 
Last week I was offered just this.
An extra $60k a year for really minimal time on my part.
It is an amazing opportunity to boot.
And I feel blessed to have it knock on my door.
 
But as I sit here over the week and feel into my heart.
Into my gut.
Into my core.
My soul…
 
I feel disgusted in truth.
I have been dancing around with this feeling all week,
telling myself this or that.
 
Telling myself that it was fear.
That maybe I had worthiness issues,
or even that I was being lazy.
 
However,
my gut feels nasty gross at the thought of saying yes to this opportunity.
I feel like my boundaries are being pushed on before they ever are.
I feel like I might have to fight for my boundaries and end up in a piss poor situation that could not only break open old wounds that I have done so much effing work around, but perhaps scar me even deeper.
 
I keep hearing certain statements made in my inquiry process that just do not sit well in my body and if I lean in to those feelings, I find myself being a f-ck no to the opportunity.
 
I feel edgy.
I feel nauseated.
I feel fear.
 
So what do I do?
Do I lean into a situation,
and opportunity,
because it appears to be so financially rewarding and even will help me in building my brand better potentially and gaining further exposure to potential clients and other opportunities?
 
OR…
 
Do I listen to my soul.
Listen to the reality that no matter how great it may appear from the outside, that my soul is not in alignment to it?
 
I tend to pause in moments like this.
I pause.
I do research.
And I sit with it a few days.
I understand the power of the ego,
and how it wants to raise havoc in our lives, preventing us from not stepping into all that we can be-do-have,
by getting us to embrace fear, shame, guilt, uncertainty or scarcity thinking.
Making us believe that something is something more or less than what our soul knows it to be.
 
The truth is simple.
Soul alignment is ALL that matters.
 
Whether,
you are looking at a relationship,
a job opportunity,
a new business,
a diet or workout,
or any life change or event,
right down to deciding on what you want for dinner.
 
Because even your dinner should be in soul alignment.
If you are willing to sacrifice and not be in alignment with the food you put into your body,
then where else are you willing to say yes or no when you mean the opposite.
 
When it just does not feel right,
but you feel shame, guilt, fear over stating your authentic answer?
 
Soul alignment at all cost is where it is at.
 
It can feel like the most challenging thing to do.
Which should,
when you think about it seem silly.
 
Silly because,
since when is saying yes to our soul,
yes to what we know to be right and good for us,
yes to alignment,
something that should be challenging?
 
It should not be challenging.
It should just be.
It should just be a no duh sorta thing.
 
RIGHT?
 
But it is not.
Reality is that ego has us all by the balls quiet frequently.
It has us jumping through hoops of fear and doubt,
acting from a place of scarcity and unworthiness,
instead of faith, love and abundance.
 
The things that feel good.
Even when they give us butterflies in our tummies.
 
The things that make our hearts smile.
And make our souls proud.
 
For me,
soul alignment is my only focus.
 
I won’t take on a new client even if I do not feel aligned to them.
 
And I certainly will not allow anyone into my personal life,
or my bed that I am not feeling aligned too.
 
If I step out of soul alignment,
which I do all too often on accident and because I am but only human at the end of the day,
I quickly look at where I stepped away from soul,
and do whatever it takes to get back into my flow.
 
If soul alignment is not your cup of tea,
you believe that it is just a pot a crap that all us new agey peep’s and supporters harp on because it is the hot topic,
bu that the real truth is that you just gotta compromise, shut up and bend over and take it, or that you have to spend all your time and energy doing what you don’t feel like doing because that is how life works and that is how success is achieved,
 
well then…
 
I am sorry.
 
Not really.
But I know that I cannot change your mind on this.
And that that very belief makes you out of alignment with my soul,
 
so why bother?
 
Back to the point of this share,
Soul Alignment.
 
You are either in it or you are not.
 
I can tell you that when I wake up to my munchkins jumping into bed with me,
snuggling up and saying, “Mommy, mommy I love you.”
And I feel good about who I am,
all that I do,
and all that I can provide.
I know that this feeling is what matters most.
Because as soon as I start to ignore my soul and the emotions and feelings that is guides me with,
I actually loose myself.
 
And in loosing myself,
I sacrifice my life.
In this sacrifice,
I also potentially sacrifice all that I can be-do-have,
and say no to the f-ck yes life that I desire.
 
So what are you willing to sacrifice for an opportunity,
a relationship,
or anything else that is not a f-ck yes to your soul?
 
Look at the true price of it.
 
It’s always your choice.
 
Praying you decide wisely and in favor of soul alignment.
 
As always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
 
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The only question any morning is…

One of those mornings where it’s to freaking’ cold to get out of bed.

Where I just find myself not wanting to even venture to the bathroom to pee.

Brrrrrrr….

Talked Levi my 12 year old son into going downstairs and making mom coffee.
Such a sweet boy.
He made it, brought it up to bed side and kissed my forehead as he asked if he could snuggle after school with me some and then left to make it to class on time.

Yes it is one of those mornings.

It is one of those mornings, where I feel hormonal, tired and non-productive. My lower back is aching and my ovaries are screaming at me.

I can feel my energy drained even though I have not even started my day yet.

I can feel my temperament a little off as well.
I am sensitive.

Yes it is one of those mornings.

It is one of those mornings, where I lay here focusing in on my gratitude’s in life, on the blessings and the joys. I snuggle under my covers and think of all the beauty God has given me. The opportunity and the love.

I am grateful.
Yes it one of those mornings.

It is one of those mornings where my Our Family Wizard buzzes and I see that my baby daddy has messaged me bright and early, thinking our son is still ill like yesterday, I open the message to see what’s up and discover that I have a boundary being pushed on. That his desire is to control my world and dictate my day to me despite what I have already shared. My ego flares and my heart aches. Fear rises up inside of me as I feel suddenly overwhelmed and lost in life.

Yes it is one of those mornings.

Brrrrr….

It is a day of turning inward.
It is a day of standing up.
It is a day of honoring my body.
It is a day to remain present.

Like every day.
It is a day in life.

And the truth behind today,
is nothing greater than the truth of yesterday or a day last week or last year.

It is just a day.

Perhaps you have noticed that in life we are always offered many options as to how our day will unfold.
Thus how our week,
our month,
our year
and our lives,
will unfold.

It comes down to the thoughts we choose to attach too.
It comes down to the games we decide to enter into with our ego’s.
It comes down to what we choose to focus on.

This is what makes all the difference.

I am often asked, ” But how do I stop thinking about this or that? It’s so bad, so stressful. It worries me. I am fearful of it.I cannot just not think about it.”

No you may not be able to stop the thoughts from coming through.
You may still feel the concern, the worry, the fear.
But here is the truth,
YOU and ONLY YOU make the choice to focus on it or not.
You are the one who chooses to attach to that thought, to that emotion and allow it to guide and even control your actions, your future thoughts, your future feelings and your life.

If you want to live a Freedom Based Life,
If you want to wake up every morning and feel in charge and in harmony with life,
In flow with your life and purpose.
And most importantly in love with who you are and where you are.

Then you must let go of the need to attach to these unsupportive thoughts.

You must let go of the idea that you are a victim to the thoughts.

Or a victim to anything.
You must let go of the idea that someone else or something outside of yourself has any control of how you choose to show in life,
to feel,
to think.

If you want a F-ck Yes Life!

And baby you deserve this.
Then you HAVE to LET GO!
You have to KNOW that the only thing you can ever do,
is stay present and do everything within your power to focus on what makes you feel good.

This is your ONLY work.

So yes….

It is one of those mornings.
It is a morning of snuggles,
a morning of sweet gestures,
a morning of love and kindness,

It is a morning of hormones,
of back aches and fatigue,
a morning of frustration,
of ego trying grab hold,

It is a morning of gratitude.
It is a morning of power.
It is a morning of self-love and acceptance.

It is a morning where once again the opportunity to Claim the life we want is at our bedside.

The only thing to decide this morning is,
Am I F-ck YES or a F-ck NO.

Will You Embrace Your Power and Claim Your Freedom Based Life?

As always,
Stop Existing & Start Living

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Embrace Your Power – Claim Your Life
“5 Step’s to a Freedom Based Life”

THIS is the THING that will prevent you from having it all.

The reason you will never have the relationships,
the lifestyle, the money or anything else that you really want is because your f-cking scared to death to call it in.
 
to ask for it.
To set the stage for it.
Your f-cking scared to death,
that if you actually just let it rip,
that the world would run away from you and that you would loose all that you have,
and having what you have is better than not having anything at all,
even though it is a long shot from what your soul desires.
 
 

Isn’t that right Baby?

 
So you sit there in your suffering.
In your fear of making changes,
taking steps,
and sharing your heart and soul.
 
 
The comforts of your dis-satisfaction and smallness with life,
is something that you cannot seem to let go of.
 
And THIS,
 

This is the THING,

that will will prevent you every God damn day from having what you really want in your:
 
Finances
Career
Relationships
Sex
Health
Lifestyle
Faith
 
 
This morning I sat down to checked into my email, like I do every morning around 10am. My phone had been popping off with text messages from five old lovers and I questioned what the heck was going on in my energy to call in all this attention from relationships of the past.
 
I questioned if I was stepping down in my vibe?
I questioned if I was feeling un-seen, unloved or something else?
Was I simply needing attention?
Or was I getting so TURNED ON TO LIFE that my vibe was magnetizing and calling in those who desired the turn on as well?
Who need the feminine creative flow and surrender to take them to that level of depth within themselves to manifest a life that they want more than what they have within the comforts of the now.
 
As I have been sitting here analyzing these messages,
these men, and all the emotion and feelings that come up for me, I see many things.
 
To start with my judgments.
My fears.
My patterns.
My love that I hold for each of them still today.
 
And all of these things play a role in my lessons.
And in who I have become.
In gratitude and with the help of each of these gentlemen.
 
SO as I sit here and look at what the potential message is,
I see that there are some factors to what I am needing in my current life that these men could fill for me,
 
However, the question comes,
Do I open an old door that did not work back then and try again or do I keep it shut?
 
It comes down to my current needs, desires and boundaries.
In this particular case I will focus in on my boundaries as boundaries are something that MUST be developed, reevaluated and adjusted often. What is a boundary in one case may not be in another and as we learn and grow,
as we come more into who we really are and get into greater alignment with our soul,
 
our boundaries change.
 
Boundaries are part of CALLING IN what we want into our lives.
 
Without healthy boundaries, we never gain the life that we really want. Instead we push it away from us in one way or another.
 
You know what I am speaking of,
Don’t you?
 
You are a doormat.
The go to person, who never feels appreciated,
just used.
 
This is boundary issue.
 
You are the center of attention, always.
You have no space.
You are fearful of saying no,
for whatever reason.
So you are fatigued and worn out emotionally, mentally and physically.
 
This is a boundary issue.
 
You feel alone.
You look around you and you have no real relationships.
You hate people, because in your view, “they are all stupid.”
So you sacrifice relationship for the most part to avoid the drama of others.
 
This is a boundary issue.
 
If it is going to be, it is up to me.
You cannot rely on anyone but yourself.
You don’t even want to.
So you keep things nice and tidy,
limited relationships, outings or anything.
And you play within your own means,
never asking for shit.
 
This is a boundary issue.
 
You expect that others should just do/act/love/need as you do.
You think that by always doing what is needed for another,
always making yourself available,
and being a yes, is good.
will get you what you want.
 
This is a boundary issue.
 
You don’t think that boundaries are that important.
You think that others need to just relax and chill.
Stop being so serious.
And you don’t see yourself over stepping,
getting shocked when someone claims you did.
 
This is a boundary issue.
 
To name a few.
 
We are all in need of understanding our boundaries and learning how to play within the multiple relationships of our lives, boundaries as well.
 
But the tale of today,
is to make you aware that BOUNDARIES are a vital part of your manifestation process.
 
It is important for you to explore what you are needing, wanting and feel good about in any given situation.
 
And here is the real kicker….
 
If you feel uncertain,
negative,
like you want to say no,
have fear, doubt or some other ill sensation or emotion,
then what you need to get right with is this:
 

THAT IS YOUR SOUL SAYING F-CK NO!!!!!

So Listen Damn It.

 
If you want to create that #freedombasedlife that #fuckyeslifestlye then you have to HONOR your boundaries.
 
You will NEVER call in what you want to manifest.
You will NEVER vibrate at the frequency that you want or need to have the life that you desire, as long as you are saying yes when you are actually a
 

F-CK NO!!!!

 
What will I do with these five old lovers?
I will listen to my soul.
 
That is what I will do.
Each man presents a different boundary to set,
to feel into,
to learn more about myself with.
 
Each man is here offering me an opportunity to get deeper into SOUL ALIGNMENT.
 
And so I will.
That is what I will do.
 
How about you?
What will you do with the boundary lessons offered you today?
 

And as always,

Stop Existing & Start Living

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