YOU LOVE HER POWER BUT YOU FEAR IT AS WELL.
The wild woman.
Her beauty and mystery,
something that you desire to taste more of.
The way she moves,
the curl of her lips as she speaks.
You watch her every move wanting more.
She is free and open,
she laughs and plays as though she has an innocent heart,
but the fire in her eyes reveals a woman who knows herself,
a woman who was born to lead and command great army’s if need be.
You feel her power by just standing in her presence.
You feel her hunger when you come near.
She is wild and crazy,
she is untamable and unfiltered,
She is coy, collected and breathless.
And you want her.
You want to experience her touch,
her kiss, the smell of her soft skin.
You want to hold her gently as well passionately.
She tests your manliness,
she toys with your thoughts and energy.
She is deliberate.
And you know this.
But you want more.
Believing that you can hold her.
Believing that you can carry her.
Believing that you want nothing more than her radiant light to expand through all the heavens,
you cannot imagine a world without her beaming beauty and strength,
and yet you fear it.
Deep inside your being there is terror.
It is unsettling and true.
You do not feel worthy of her,
you question if you are strong enough.
She rattles your inner most cages and shakes you to your soul,
can you conquer this greatness of the wild woman,
and do you even truly want to?
Will she let you penetrate her soul?
Or will you just be among the many who have tried and only fell by entering her body?
You want to be the one.
You desire her so.
You want to be the one that takes her breath away,
the way she does yours.
And so you try….
you stand firm in her fires,
you open yourself to utter destruction.
You know that you love her,
and feel confident if just for this moment in time that you can hold strong and breathe her in and hold her.
But the wilderness of the wild woman’s soul is not to be captured nor contained by any.
She was born free and free she must remain.
She is a goddess,
she is a witch,
she is a siren,
and a Queen.
She knows her power and will allow for it only to be pushed down for so long,
and then you will feel her rise once again and claim her rightful throne,
and under her foot will fall many.
All those who wanted to own her,
to conquer and control.
These are the boys who thought they were men.
These are the men who thought they were kings.
But they shunned her light as they spoke sweet words of love.
They harnessed her joy as they held her tight in their insecurities.
They jailed her passion, her sensualness and power with their jealousy and fear.
And she allowed them.
She let them rule her for a time,
in hope that she could be happy.
Here in the misery of her weakened state,
She is a wild woman.
And in her beauty you will be lost,
you will desire and crave,
you will want for her light to never dim,
but will you be like all the rest who have fallen?
Claiming her as your own.
Trapping her power.
Wanting it all for yourself.
As if it were something that you could take or understand.
Far from average she is.
She was never meant to be tamed.
There is no domesticating a wild woman,
you would be wiser to destroy the most beautiful of stain glass windows, then to try.
If you love her let her remain free.
Watch her dance for you as she will.
She will make you laugh and feel full in her intoxicating ways.
Let her move you as only the wild can.
But never, never hold on too tight.
Or know that her light may be put out with your hand.
Delicate and strong,
the wilderness will always call her.
She is a wild woman,
and you are but a man.
To all my beautiful wild women out there.
You know who you are. 🙂
My sisters you are deserving of kings,
enjoy all the men that you want,
but never settle for a throne that is not yours.
Hold your power and joy before you.
Feel into your hearts and pussies for answers,
ignore the trumpting judgments of those who do not see your truth and radiance,
they are blinded by the shadows of their own fear.
You are a wild woman and always will remain.
Open yourself to the universe,
open yourself once again to the gift of receiving.
It is here in your womb that you know your truth.
Listen with your heart of the wild.
Now run forward my fellow Queen.
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
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LIVING FOR SELF.
One of the hardest lessons I keep learning in this lifetime is just this.
The constant reminder that we are truly not here for anyone’s else’s happiness but our own.
Its a difficult lesson,
Because we are trained from our birth forward that putting others feelings, well being and happiness “should” always come before our own.
However the reality is not so.
You will never find happiness or fulfillment in putting yourself on the back burner of your own life.
We are all here for the same reason,
To expand and thrive.
Through our wanting for more in our life experiences we expand the universe.
It is through our conscious creation and desire that life manifests and we create everything that is, that was and ever will be.
We grow this desire and our wanting by experience of all that we do not want for,
Such as lack in any subject area that we want abundance in.
But for us to have the life that we are desiring we MUST become the person who can take hold of it. Meaning WE have to grow ourselves.
We have to become our truest self and get into alignment with out desires.
As vibrational beings this means that we HAVE TOO PUT OUR HAPPINESS FIRST.
No more playing around and taking responsibility for everyone else’s joy while we sit in toxity of giving our last drop of us to this other who at the end of the day cannot even fully gain happiness through our exhaustion.
Sure we can offset anothers sadness or life issues to a degree,
But cannot eternally fix anyone else’s shit.
We cannot actually make anyone else happy for the long haul.
Just like gratitude, love and the feeling of abundance is an inside job. All we can do is assist someone feeling those things in the short term, but if they do not find it within and know thier own worthiness then at the slighted retraction of our energy,
They will fall the fuck apart.
This is how you know that someone has become dependent on your energy.
Not realizing it often when we are in this state of dependence we are actually being what is known as an energy vampire,
One you must feed on the kindness,
The love, the empathy, and even the sadness or anger of another to keep themselves stable in life.
Those who are not acting from thier authentic selves, who are out of alignment with God thus thier own soul and who do not know themselves, love themselves, often are guilty consciously and subconsciously of doing this.
And they can make those around them feel guilty for thier life misery. They will play and toil with others emotions, acting the victim and helpless lost soul just to get thier feeding.
But this is where we all must realize that NONE OF US are here to save anyone else.
And we cannot even help them save themselves if we do not care for self first.
Its just like the speech we have all heard on the airplane at take off about the oxygen masks.
“Put it on yourself first before helping anyone else, including your child.”
This is because you are of zero help if you can’t breathe, if you are passed out or worse dead.
And the same applies to our day to day life and relationships.
You are of zero use if you exhaust yourself to the point of fatigue, disease and illness, depression all under the belief structure that you need to put every other asshole on this planet in front of self.
You MUST LIVE FOR SELF.
You must get selfish and love yourself enough to say no to everyone,
Especially when they are playing on your emotions and hoping you will feed them.
They need to learn how to love themselves enough to align the fuck up to source and not need your beautiful ass anymore.
They need to take fucking responsibility for thier own lives and energy.
For thier emotions.
And stop handing over the reigns to each and every Joe that passes by.
And you my dear,
You need to just do the same.
Its time to take back your power.
Take back your life.
Take back your energy and LOVE YOU.
Because baby you are so worthy of being in alignment and feeling fucking awesome.
You are worthy of living the life that you desire.
You are worthy of happiness, love and abundance.
Well being and satisfaction of who you are.
But you will never get any of this as long as you keep sacrificing your energy for all the vampires that you love.
Stop enabling them,
And start being you.
With all my love on this transitional day.
Stop Existing & Start Living
Coaching for Grown A*s Believers
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THE ABSENCE OF WHO I AM, REALLY SUCKS! 🤯🤯🤯
Hating on self?
Or maybe you say that you don’t hate yourself.
You don’t dislike yourself even,
you are just frustrated.
Down on self because you are not feeling great in your skin.
And I get it.
I truly do.
We all go through these times.
And hey here is a little secret for you….🤫
I am currently in one of those moments in life where I am a bit down on myself. I am not in this moment in love with my body.
I am not in love with how I am feeling in my own skin,
and I am having issues looking myself in the mirror.
and even feeling sexy.
I sorta feel a bit grossed out by myself.
The way I got here is not really important.
And that is a tough concept to get through our human minds,
because we want to have our reasons, we want to analyze and figure out the reason behind the problem.
But that will never get the solving that we desire of the problem.
Because we are stating that we have a problem to begin with instead of just letting go of all this self-judgement and turning back to our truth.
Now it is important to be aware of habit changes,
of sabotaging thing that we have introduced into our lives,
into our thoughts and emotions,
that may be contributing to the support of this self-disgust.
The reality is that you can say that you love yourself all damn day long but if you are not loving your body enough to get it moving and consuming healthy foods, staying hydrated and getting enough sleep,
plus if you are choosing to stay in toxic relationship that are not feeding your heart and soul,
and you are not leaning into YOU…
then you simply are lieing your f-cking ass off to yourself about loving yourself.
You have to fall in love with yourself.
You have to own up to your power and stop making yourself so damn small.
Stop fearing the impressive, expansive person that YOU ARE.
And that my love is why you are so full of this yuckiness to yourself.
👉The reason that you don’t like yourself is because you’re not up to speed with yourself. 🛸🤯💃
You got that love?
YOU WERE BORN TO BE MARVELOUS.
You were created powerful, worthy and came into this world knowing such,
but it got stolen from you by the “good” lessons that your parents and the adults in your life taught you,
what society and school/church showed you,
and you started to believe that you were not powerful, worthy and abundant.
You started to believe that your light was dim.
and this means that you let go of being marvelous.
And that my dear was YOU.
So now the absence of you, really sucks!
It really does not have you feeling your best.
You are struggling to look into the mirror or make eye contact.
You are feeling frumpy and negative,
hating on your fleshy suit and hating on who you have allowed yourself to become.
When the answer to your problem…
if you want to call it that…
cause us humans love to solve problems, right?
Is that the reason that you are not liking yourself,
let alone in love with yourself ( an me too here),
is because you’re not ALLOWING yourself to be yourself.
You have cast your truth out.
And you sit back in your disgust over who you are right now,
and you maintain powerful focus on what needs to change, needs fixed, where you f-cked it all up at.
The worst thing that you can do though is just this.
Holding yourself in focus and finding a critical thought about you.
Because that action,
that manifestation that you are creating,
TAKES YOU AWAY FROM WHO YOU REALLY ARE.
And you are powerful AF!
You are deserving.
You are beautiful and strong.
You are courageous and loving.
You are intuitive and caring.
You are worthy and abundant.
That is who you are.
That is what you are to be living, RIGHT NOW!
And it is up to only you love to take yourself from this absence of self and get the f-ck lined back up.
Synchronize to your TRUTH.
Here is where you will fall in love with you and become mesmerized by staring into your own eyes,
lost in the sea of you.
You will be captivated at your heart and your beauty and you will not just think that you are worthy,
you will KNOW without a doubt that you are,
because your soul knows.
Your souls never has questioned your worthiness or your power.
That is why you are feeling so bad love,
because you are questioning what your soul deeply is certain of.
And when you come back to YOU and who YOU REALLY ARE,
well that is when whatever the problems you are having with your body and life right now, will just wash away with ease.
Time to start loving on the most important person in your world wouldn’t you say?
And STOP trying to be all this or that for everyone else that is not you.
With all my love, beautiful.
Remember Who You Are.
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
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A hunger that you just can not fill.
This has been something that I have been playing with the last few months.
that’s not true.
It’s been something that I have been dancing around with for years now.
And I am f-cking hungry!
Which makes me irritable.
Makes me depressed some days.
Makes me look out into my life and question all that I have and all that I want,
and makes me look at what I am blessed with and say,
“Is this as good as it gets?”
I sound like a spoiled rotten bitch though when I say that.
And perhaps I have become one.
maybe I am supposed to be one.
maybe you are too.
Maybe, just maybe we are all supposed to want for more in our lives.
In our love and in our sex.
But the fear of being perceived as greedy,
and not appreciative stops us from going after what we want for.
The fear of what others will think.
That is the leading sabotager of our dreams.
And damn we are really good at finding reasons that we cannot be fulfilled in life.
Why we “should” settle,
and why we need to just shut up, sit down and stop searching, stop craving, stop wanting.
We are great at thinking that there is something wrong with us,
that we are bad people because we want for more.
Especially when we are a people of so many blessings.
The reality though love is something totally different.
The reality is that the way that this universe and God evolve and expand is through our wanting.
Our desires birth into existence everything that we currently have and everything that will ever be.
The issue with our desires is that they make those around us uncomfortable.
Especially when we start speaking about our sex and money.
These two things we are damned for no matter which way we turn.
If we want more of them then we are damned and greedy, we are sluts and only focused on gratification of self.
If we want for less of them or allow less of them in our lives then we are told that we are not worthy of everything else in life because we don’t have enough of these two things which means that we are unattractive, stupid, weak, disliked, etc.
So no matter what we do, when it comes to our sex and our money we are f-cked and not in a fun or good fashion.
So what can we do with these unholy hungers that we have and we run and try and hide from but that creep up and make themselves known in the most inopportune moments?
How do we curb our cravings to have the love, the sex, the money and abundance without feeling shameful and guilty for wanting more or better? Or any for that matter.
Or for wanting to change things up and play with what we have to try and create something more robust and expansive?
First we have to KNOW…
I mean truly KNOW with all the certainty that we can muster up that WANTING is natural and healthy.
The craving for something is a showing that our soul wants it for us as well and is already in pursuit for it and has found a path.
The negative emotions that stem from our craving of wanting something more and better reveals that we are out of alignment with our soul and with our power. We would not be able to feel this negative vibe if we were in alignment.
You see when we are in alignment we feel f-cking great.
We are focused,
we are clear minded,
we feel powerful and turned on to life,
We have confidence and are loose in our life, able to flow toward what we are wanting because we are allowing ourselves to be taken to it versus constricting ourselves and causing ourselves to get caught up in worry and fear.
Next we have to realize that ALL things…
Did you read that?
ALL THINGS CHANGE.
They must change.
In order for us to grow,
to gain what we claim we want,
in any subject area of life,
we must allow for evolution to occur.
We cannot have what we want by remaining the same person that we are today.
Even if we have a dynamic relationship,
a bank full of money,
great health and everything that we “think” that we can want for,
we still must allow for evolution to happen within ourselves and our lives as well as within any one of these areas if we want to maintain the area and/or expand/heal it.
You will never find happiness by insisting on things to remain the same.
Just like you cannot expect things to remain at the same level of connection,
the same level of turn on,
or anything else.
Life has its storms,
These storms are about you developing your ideal version of you.
These storms are something for us to learn how to move through in confidence and love,
and that in the storms of life,
we must expect that things will pull from us or push up against us and often this will feel uncomfortable.
But the discomfort is there to alert us to the areas inside of ourselves that we need to learn to lean more into,
speak more truth from,
see more authentically,
reveal in vulnerability more,
and to trust and love on.
These raw spaces that get revealed are the spaces that evolve us to our highest potential.
And thus create the life that we want.
Bringing our dreams into reality.
And it is saying that it is time that you start to pay mother f-cking attention to your SOUL.
It’s time that you start to take notice of that hunger before it becomes a ravenous beast that will destroy you and everything in its path to getting fed.
I am hungry.
I am craving more in all areas of my life and I have an amazingly full and abundant life.
My cup runneth over for sure.
And I want to keep it that way.
Because the truth of the matter is,
only with a full cup can you truly share without fear,
and help others.
Only by valuing yourself to the levels that God values can you give your gift in this world.
And only through the pursuit of evolution through love,
of self can you grow your soul and experience happiness.
Because happiness is not about the things that you have but who you become gaining the things that you have.
Who are you today and what does your tale say about your journey?
Stop existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
Join me later this month for an expansive workshop about magick, love, sex and the law of attraction. We are going to be putting together the pieces of your puzzle and breaking down the barriers that have been holding you back from saying yes fully to your desired life.
My heart felt like it was being crushed.
My chest had a weight on it that no matter how I tried to calm my breathing,
no matter the stretching and massaging that I provided my chest,
the pressure and constriction simply would not stop.
There was this low grade level of anxiety rising in my system as I could feel my body fighting with me.
But why was this happening?
I was not fearful of travel.
I was not feeling out of sorts with my lover who was sitting right there with me.
There was nothing that I could consciously come up with in this moment that would support the pain that I was in.
Fast forward a few hours….
We had landed. Gotten our car. And made it to the fauntleroy ferry in West Seattle. I was feeling far calmer now then just a few hours prior in the Uber ride to the airport.
However as soon as our Jeep rolled onto the ferry and we got parked the overwhelming feelings of being crushed and the anxiety made themselves known again.
Breathing deep as I could in the moment I quickly walked myself to the upper deck of the ferry and called my breath as I looked out over the harbor to Vashon Island. The wind encompassed me with the soft smell of sea salt in it,
the waves crashed up against the sides of the ferry, the sun let me feel delicate moments of warmth on the skin that was revealed and here I was in this moment,
There was no reason in this moment to stand here on this ferry and cry,
yet the tears came anyway.
And as they did the release into whatever was holding in my chest and begging me to let it go left with them.
Here on the ferry overlooking the water I surrendered to the unknown.
I let myself go into what logically made no sense.
I was happy.
I was excited to share my love of Washington with my lover for a few days.
I was feeling relaxed until I was not.
And my mind wanted answers.
My mind wanted to become Sherlock Holmes and figure it all out,
make reason for the pain,
and my holding of it.
But my soul and heart understood its truth.
My body and mind had been arguing you could say.
They were not in alignment.
And THAT is what was causing me to suffer.
WIthout realizing it I was not surrendering to the beauty and release of this trip. I was holding onto an old concept,
I was holding onto the version of me who used to live here in Seattle all those years ago and STRUGGLE in life.
who missed so much of the greatness of this place.
Here I was 15 years later, holding onto these fragments of self.
Not letting myself release fully into who I have become.
Who I have grown into being and the life that I have today.
The fear of the old me was actually creating physical pain in the current. The old thought programs and beliefs around money and relationships that I use to try to exist in life were being unmasked in my energy and my current state of who I AM was being asked by my old sabotaging thoughts and ideas to lay down and shut up.
And here was the significant constriction that I was feeling.
The feeling like I could not breathe.
The feeling like my chest was going to explode and my ribs were being broken from the inside out.
The agony in my gut.
And the intense headache that came with it all as my whole being just wanted to flee the idea of this trip I had planned.
I was not surrendering to me.
I was not surrendering to this moment.
I was not surrendering to life or what it was blessing me with.
And I was not surrendering all because of an old concept and old beliefs that were trying to make themselves current.
I was out of alignment.
The issue with my alignment was causing me the pain and the fear.
The only thing that could save me was my own surrender into the depths of the unknown,
into this moment.
into this experience.
into life and what it was offering me.
And as I did so,
the tears streamed down my face,
the wind whipped itself around me,
the waves crashed against the ferry boat,
the sun shone through the clouds and asked to warm my skin,
and I took a deep breath letting it all go.
My world was right again.
My body let go of everything that it was holding,
and it let go of the need to falsely try and control what it could not control.
It let go of this moment in life and allowed the moment to JUST BE.
Without a need to know what was going to come next.
Without the need to hold onto the moment and ask that it never change or leave.
My SOUL was again in the driver’s seat,
and in it I was aligned.
Some would look at moments like this or times that they feel these same constrictions and fears, anxiety and “gut reactions” as signs to turn and go another direction.
and sometimes they can mean just that for sure,
However often they are signs that we are on the tipping edge of everything that we desire to be birthed into our world and our old versions of self are there testing us.
Asking us if we are sure that we truly want everything that we have proclaimed that we do.
Many people at this moment misread what their body, mind and emotions are speaking to them and they turn away from EVERYTHING.
They will say,
“That’s just too risky.”
“I need to see it to believe it.”
“I need to know that this person is as invested as I am.”
” I don’t want to hurt so and so or get hurt.”
“Timing is wrong, I can feel it.”
And they step away from life.
They step away from some of the best moments of living.
They turn away from the experiences that will grow them into that next version and they do it all in the name of “having a feeling.”
They do it based on logic.
They do it because they look at the suffering and pain,
the anxiety as a symbol that THIS IS NOT THE PATH.
When that is not at all what is being said.
Your SOUL is saying this FEAR that you are having right now is here telling you that THIS….
THIS is the perfect path that will transform you into that next beautiful version of who you were born to become.
This fear that you are having is here because you have control issues and life is not for controlling, it is here for you to love and enjoy,
and in your loving and enjoying of each delicate moment and your release into the unknown you BIRTH YOURSELF.
And you BECOME.
But you must SURRENDER.
In the small moments as well as the big ones.
Because the universe/God is not looking at the size of the moments,
but at your ability to be in alignment with SOURCE.
That is the meaning of FAITH.
That is having CERTAINTY that you will always get what you want for and need.
That is how you make MAGICK in your life and THRIVE.
Can you surrender to life?
We are all being asked to do just this.
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
Message me for deets on the Magick Minute.
LOVE SHOULD BE PERFECT.
And yet it never is.
A long time ago when I was living in Seattle, Washington I was attending a church in Kent with a pastor that I adored. I learned so much from Pastor Jack. He was focused on teaching the congregation about blessings, about our glory and how that translated into the law of attraction.
I still make use of his teachings today with my clients almost daily and in my shares here with you as well.
Among my favorite things he shared were,
“More than enough with plenty left over.”
Which always commanded in the belief and feeling that we are always provided for,
that we always have more than enough in the things that we need with plenty left to share.
And that the leftovers are there for us to do just that …..SHARE.
And then his other reminder of truth that I have kept in my heart and mind all these years was focused toward relationships….
The relationship of marriage.
And in today’s world,
which even though greatly different than that of just 15 years ago when Pastor Jack was preaching his wisdom to me,
is still all the same.
His words of truth were simple.
“Marry your best friend.”
Those words made me look at my marriage,
and perhaps were words that supported me to divorce a few years later. Although back then I would have felt the need to confirm that I was best friends with my then husband,
the reality was not that we were best friends.
We got along on a ton of items,
but I found that I had to restrict myself in so many ways,
and that was not friendship,
and certainly not best friends.
When I am working with couples today in my coaching practice many come to me troubled and on the cusp of a breaking up because of so many things…
*Not enough sex or bad sex.
*Abuse of one kind or another.
*Lack of sexual desire.
And most couples will start off their tale by telling me that they are best friends with their spouse,
that they can tell them anything,
that they have fantastic communication.
fill in the blank from above list here.
They believe that if they had more sex/better sex or a stronger desire for their partner,
if they were physically attracted more to them,
if they had more money in the bank,
or what have you that their marriage would be perfect.
Now the reality is that if you are in an abusive relationship ( no matter what that looks like) that chances are you need to get out of it because an abusive partner often does not see their wrong and change,
if you are in a relationship that has suffered from infidelity,
There can be work done and you can repair it and even come back stronger than ever before if love and communication/friendship is at the front stage of both parties minds.
The desire for more sex, better sex or having more desire for your partner… .these things can be detrimental if the friendship and love are not there first and if both parties are not open to raw, real discussions based in truth and love to work on these challeneges,
but if both parties are wanting the connection and can be emotionally mature to take responsibility for self and speak their truth and work together on these items,
then you can have a deeply strong bond and the sex and desire can grow from it.
The relationships that come to me wanting these things,
often have one MAJOR obstacle however…
One partner is stubborn and refuses to see the truth.
Refuses to take the matter seriously or take the time and effort required to build this part of the relationship. They don’t believe that it is their problem and that the other partner is to blame for it and needs the fixing.
However that is never the case.
Relationships are always a two way street.
It always requires both people to want to connect and come together. It requires both parties to take responsibility for themselves and to not get caught up in their old wounds from the past.
Unfortunately, this is where the relationship breaks down.
People often don’t want to do this.
They want the easy street and they say,
“Love should be easy.”
“Love should be perfect.”
We are all human.
And there is no such thing as the perfect human.
If you have a list of fifty qualities that you want and count highly important in a mate,
and you believe that you will get ALL of these qualities in one person and until you get them all that you will not settle,
I ask you to look in the mirror and ask of yourself if you exhibit all fifty of them yourself?
You are never going to find someone who is 100% of those qualities a hundred percent of the time.
They are human.
You are human.
And life changes and transforms us.
Some qualities can be developed over time.
Some are just there and a natural part of who we are,
some are based on energetic connections,
while others have everything to do with our gene pool.
If you are counting any of these qualities as love though,
you are mistaken.
Qualities do not define love.
They add to love.
They sweeten the pot.
Love is something that you cannot explain,
nor does it need to be explained.
It just is.
And when it is felt on both sides now you have something special.
LOVE COMES FROM BEING ABLE TO BE YOURSELF WITH SOMEONE ELSE, UNMASKED.
When we can do this with someone,
we feel acceptance and love for self and it translates to “loving someone else” because we see the reflection of what we are feeling for self as what we see coming or going toward another.
When we “fall in love” or catch feels for someone,
what is actually happening is that we are witnessing ourselves in love. We are falling in love with self and this other person is simply helping us see our own beauty.
That is why the best friend statement is so powerful.
In friendship there is an acceptance, an unconditional love.
It goes past all that life can change for us,
like our physical bodies appearance,
our health or financial status,
it looks past our ups and downs and even past the chemical connectors that we have on the front side of a romantic relationship that over the course of three to five years diminish and change.
But for some reason, we humans believe that love should be perfect.
That these connecting chemicals should ALWAYS be there,
that the energy and excitement of the first kiss is the way that we will remain throughout all of time,
that the person who is standing before us perfect in their skin of today will never change,
that the feelings that we are having will just remain unwavering.
Or that if we do not have all these sudden rushes of ignition but that we do deeply care and connect in all other ways that this is not or cannot be real love.
That it is “ONLY FRIENDSHIP” and we in turn lower it to that level and get frustrated that we cannot find Mr. or Mrs. Perfect that checks all of our boxes on our list of fifty all of the time.
And so we remain living in search of something that has been offered to us repeatedly. Believing that if we explore,
if we open ourselves to the love that is there before us and go as deep as we can with it that we are settling,
we are giving up,
that if they don’t have everything that they are not Mr. or Mrs. Perfect and instead are a waste of our precious time.
What we are doing to ourselves in this is denying ourselves the beauty of discovery of love.
Love is a quest of self.
Love is about finding out who we really are through our relating with another.
It is about meeting all aspects of self,
and without relationship we will never meet our authentic selves at any depth.
When we continue to look for perfection in a mate,
What we are actually saying is that we ourselves are not worthy of our own love until we become PERFECT as well.
So how will you ever find Mr. or Mrs. Perfect if you prevent yourself from growing into your whole beautiful self by denying love to be birthed through a relationship with another imperfect human who is there as your teacher of self love?
Chances are your relationship with anyone will not last in a forever sense.
That reality although harsh is still a reality.
We outgrow each other,
and as we change sometimes our mates choose a path of slower or limited growth that creates a breaking point in the relationship,
but if we have come together in friendship and love,
then even the parting is done in the same fashion.
And we each can gain what we need for our own development.
It’s time that we start to view relationships and even marriage as the opportunity to explore self and learn to love deeply through the witnessing of another that rivets us deeper into our truth.
Love is always perfect.
It is always perfect for the moment that the relationship is in.
It is never easy,
but it can always be in flow with who we are.
We create our own obstacles to feeling it by trying to make it perfect in every moment and getting irritated with the reality that love, true love requires each party to grow in connection with self first.
Where does your love stand?
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
Want to learn more about how self-love helps create the grounds to call in your soulmate love today? Reach out to me today for deet’s on 1:1 coaching now.