Love & Marriage: It’s an institute you can’t disparage… or can you? by Scott Beauregard

wedding1Having been married in my past and when that marriage ended, as all too many in current society do, in divorce I was lost for a period of time.   I struggled with the concepts of what society says is the path to happiness.    I started to look deeper into my own thoughts and beliefs about marriage.   While It may seem in this piece that I’m condemning marriage that is not truly the case.   I’m not condemning marriage, but more condemning the reasons we enter into a marriage contract.  

 

In doing research based on this subject it quickly became apparent that there is not reliable historical information regarding marriage and rarely is the word “love” mentioned in all of the definitions and histories of marriage.   Let’s look at the current state of marriage and its role in keeping us disconnected from our true selves.   Although attitudes are starting to change slowly when it comes to the definition of marriage,  this is not going to turn into a political debate. It has been commonly held that marriage is the union of one man and one woman for quite sometime.    Look at that last statement again, specifically, “union of”.    What does that bring into your mind?    A partnership, a combining of equal parts?  If it is so that this union of, and we can even expand it out to two people, is an equal partnership then why are people so lost and looking, searching for that one connection that will “save” them.    The divorce rate is through the roof.    Domestic abuse and violence is at an all time high.    We don’t seem to be learning anything and making the same mistakes over and over.   

 

People both men and women, straight, gay, bi, have relationships with 6-10 different people in their lifetime.   All under the guise of finding “the one”.    The one that will allow me to be happy.   As those numbers point out there’s not “the one”, although in rare instances it does happen or at least appear on the surface.   That older couple that has been together for 50, 60, 70 years, we’ve all heard those stories about a love that endures.    It is obvious that these rare occurrences that the couple understands something about unconditional love or they hide the true nature of the relationship from even themselves.   

 

wedding-cows-heartlandboostMarriage is a contract not of equals, but of property.    That’s right property.    It is nothing more than a contract where the man agrees to provide security and physical property and  woman agrees to become property of the husband for the security and physical property that is or will be owned and for the purposes of procreation so the physical property is in the hands of known relations.    Men have through fear convinced women to give up their true feminine nature for stuff basically.    Women have accepted the mantle of chattel on the antiquated notion that they will be provided for.   If this is not true in this day and age why is it that more and more women have given up their feminine energetic natures and taken on more masculine natures in their lives.   

 

asian-couple-man-carrying-womanSo many people today still think that their happiness can come from another person.    This is a crazy notion.   One of the questions asked often in my counseling/coaching sessions is “Who can make you happy”, over 90% of the time the answer is “I can”.   Next question is can anyone else?   answer no.    This is followed up with a question creates a lot of confusion.     “Who can hurt you?” almost every person says “anybody”.    When that is questioned with “If you are the only one that can make you happy,  how is it that “anybody” can hurt you?”

 

If a good number of people can realize at this time that they are responsible for their own happiness why is it so difficult to accept that one is just as responsible for the hurts that come into one’s life.    They bring this perception into the marriage contract and that is a pretty good indicator of why the divorce rate is so high.    That and the fact that it is INSANE that women in this day and age would agree willingly to trade themselves for physical property and the illusion of security.  

 

It’s not all their fault.  The male has done a superb job of selling a bill of goods for hundreds or thousands of years that this is the only way it will work.    The old patriarchal paradigm of conquest, control, and ownership is still in full effect today.  Things are starting to change slowly.  People in general are starting to take off the blinders.    People are getting married for the first time later in life or choosing not to get married at all.    Society is growing up and women are starting to wake up to the fact that the male will not give up what they have gained easily and the woman will have to take responsibility for becoming whole again.  The male also bears responsibility in becoming whole but too many males still have that macho I need to conquer my world mentality.    Using tantra and coaching it is possible to heal individual males and females, and couples as well.

 

  When two people centered in the divine self, the unconditional love, the pure awareness, is it possible to create a union of equals.    This is not to be seen though as an answer to fix the marriage contract though.    It is only the understanding of what a relationship is supposed to be, for a reason, a season or on the rare occasions a lifetime.  This can be applied to any relationship, friends, lovers, parents, children, etc.  When we are centered in awareness and connected to that unconditional source, it becomes easier to love without attachment to thoughts of would, should, could.  Which puts expectations of action or inaction, on the other person which will just lead down a path of hurting the self or other person with those expectations.

 

While there will always be those that prefer the marriage contract to the alternative, if we can get to the point of being centered within ourselves we can more easily handle the points in time when the current relationship we are in no longer serve the highest and greatest good of either party while maintaining the unconditional love and respect of the other party.       

Read more from Scott at Authentic Living

Balance or Harmony by Alexander Brighton

So many people that I’ve had conversations with have told me that they are seeking balance in their life.    I decided to go look up the word balance on dictionary.com.   It read a state of equilibrium.  Searching further equilibrium means a state of rest due to the equal action of opposing forces.     When you have two or more opposing forces that are exerting equal action you can develop balance.    As we move through our daily lives we have more than 2 opposing forces at any one time.    Rarely do these forces exert equal action or force.     So if you can only have balance with opposing forces exerting equal force then the realization of balance never develops.   

 

How many times have we been faced with opposing thoughts(forces)?  Here’s an example that we’ve all faced.   I have to go to work, however, I’d much rather stay home and spend time with a loved one.    These are not applying equal action on us.   If the need for money is greater it will exert greater force.     If the need for connection with the loved one is greater than the need  of money then taking the day off would be exerting greater force.   Balance or equilibrium needs opposing forces to be created.    Opposing forces create a duality within us.     That duality rarely ever has equal action on both sides, there for balance is missed and our lives are lopsided.    Like that shopping cart with the one flat spot on the wheel that goes clunk clunk clunk as we walk through the grocery store.

 Whats the alternative then? Harmony.

Again going back to dictionary.com harmony means a consistent, orderly, or pleasing arragment of parts.    When we move away from trying to get opposing forces to exert equal action at the same time, we can start to build harmony in our lives.   Instead of dealing with the duality of opposing forces, build your life so there is agreement with all the different forces in your life.    I will go to work today and then take my loved one out for a nice dinner, or make a nice dinner. Even when something is out of balance it can still be in harmony.    That shopping cart that I mentioned earlier.   If you are out of balance and out of harmony with your life that constant clunk might push you to the point of madness.   

However, if you are out of balance AND in harmony  you might notice that that clunk is in perfect time with the music playing in the store and smile.  Some that I have talked to want to find balance for every aspect of their life.    This is mostly impossible.    Just take gender as an example I hear people all the time state they want to balance their masculine and feminine energy.   These are opposing forms of energy.  Very complementary but opposite.   Whether  you are male or female you have both energies within you.    However they are rarely ever to the point that they are applying or exerting equal action in your life so then how can you balance them.    Working to get the masculine and feminine to be in harmony though, that’s beautiful.   They no longer have to be exerting equal action.   You could be 75% feminine and 25% masculine and still be in harmony.    The energies working in harmony to create the consistent, orderly, or pleasing arrangement of parts or energies in this case.  You give up the battle of duality of trying to be 50% feminine and 50% masculine.   

As you start to apply the harmony principle to your life you will start to find that things may come into balance naturally.   Harmony allows us to take a step back from the constant battle of duality.    It allows us to build ONE life that flows by taking these forces and into a simultaneous combination.    Where each force becomes a note on the music of your life.     A piece of music that you are the author of.  

 

What do you want the music of your life to sound like?

Read more from this Daka/Soul Coach HERE

Learn more about Alexander Brighton and his unique approach to healing through  the “I AM Experience”

How to Date A Goddess Wombman — Aurora Kozinn

Dear men,

There are many kinds of women. Each type- New Agers, Hippie chicks.. whatever category you connect to — has it own energetic vibration.

Goddess Wombmen, for example, are the most seductive and the most empowered wombmen in the world. They love their body. They live in their body. And they fully express their divinity through their sensuality. It is her nature to do so.

If you are a man interested in dating a goddess, be fair warned, she is Kali- Aphrodite. As Aphrodite the goddess of love she will envelope you with kisses and juicy sexual practices. She will glow and you will be in awe of her glow.  But , because she is Aphrodite, her love will span beyond you. If she wants to be sexual with a man, this is her prerogative.  She cannot be contained by any man– her “containment” is only found in her deep devotion to her guides’ voices and her connection to spirit.

Her Kali is cutting through your illusion of what a woman “should” be.  A goddess is never “your” woman, but this goddess will bow down at your feet if you display to her you ARE the sacred masculine.

Kali takes you on a journey to discover your own sacred masculine potential. When goddess Kali shows you her dark moon, hold space for her. She will challenge you to become Jesus, Krishna, Buddha, Shiva…

She will cut away your beliefs that “This is how women are” in regards to the old paradigm.

All a goddess knows is love without abandon. She believes in living by emotional nurturance, support, ecstatic and sensual dance, and sacred love making.

To date a Goddess, you must be sensual, support her independence, allow her to love freely, and honor her sacred sexual dance.

The God/dess knows that Sacred Masculine men are equal, and the counterpart to Goddess Wombmen.

 

To be clear, if you’d like to be with a goddess, you must be GOD.

If you want to change the world…Love a Woman – by Lisa Citore

Love a Woman

If you want to change the world…love a woman….really love her. Find the one who calls to your soul, who doesn’t make sense. Throw away your check list and put your ear to her heart and listen. Hear the names, the prayers, the songs of every living thing…… If your eyes aren’t filled with tears, if you aren’t bowing at her feet, … you haven’t ever grieved having almost lost her.

If you want to change the world… love a woman…..one woman beyond yourself, beyond desire and reason. We have given ourselves so many choices we have forgotten that true liberation comes from standing in the middle of the soul’s fire and burning through our resistance to Love. There is only one Goddess. Look into Her eyes and see…..really see if she is the one to bring the axe to your head. to severe you from the old life so that you can enter the new.
If you want to change the world… love a woman. Love her for life….beyond your fear of death, Don’t tell her you’re willing to die for her. Say you’re willing to LIVE with her, plant trees with her and watch them grow. Be her hero by telling her how beautiful she is in her vulnerable majesty, by helping her to remember every day that she IS a Goddess through your adoration and devotion.
If you want to change the world… love a woman in all her faces, through all her seasons and she will heal you of your double-mindedness and half-heartedness which keeps your Spirit and body separate- which keeps you alone and always looking outside your Self for something to make your life worth living.
If you want to change the world… love a woman, just one woman . Love and protect her as if she is the last holy vessel. Love her through her fear of abandonment which she has been holding for all of humanity. No, the wound is not hers to heal alone. No, she is not weak in her codependence.
If you want to change the world… love a woman all the way through until she believes you, until her instincts, her visions, her voice, her art, her passion, her wildness have returned to her- until she is a force of love more powerful than all the forces that seek to devalue and destroy her.
If you want to change the world, lay down your causes, your guns Lay down your inner war, your righteous anger and love a woman… beyond all of your striving for greatness, beyond your tenacious quest for enlightenment. The holy grail stands before you if you would only take her in your arms and let go of searching for something beyond this intimacy.
What if peace is a dream which can only be remembered through the heart of Woman? What if a man’s true love for Woman, the Way of the Feminine is the key to opening Her heart?
If you want to change the world…love a woman to the depths of your shadow, to the highest reaches of your Being, back to the Garden where you first met her, to the gateway of the rainbow realm where you walk through together as One, to the point of no return, to the ends and the beginning of a new Earth.